Hello! Again, thank you to all of my readers! I worry that I can't write other characters that good. And Eren is one of them. Please enjoy! :3
Her words sent a shock-wave of murmurings among the occupants of the room. Eren took a step forward as if to say something, but a glare from Levi made him step back against the wall. Erwin leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table and crossing his hands in front of his face. His steady gaze reflected Annie's.
"You're absolutely sure of this," he said slowly.
"I wouldn't waste my breath lying to you," Annie said. It was unclear whether the cynical undertone in her voice was directed at him or not.
"I don't think she's lying, Commander," Hange said, not sure if she was excited or not. If Leonhardt was really telling the truth, then that meant there were two less enemies to fight, but two less titans to study and learn from. She could tell Erwin was thinking along the same lines.
Erwin nodded. "Same here. Well, Leonhardt, that information is much appreciated. Do you have anything else you'd like to tell us?"
Annie shook her head once. "No."
"Alright. Your guards will now escort you back to your room. We're going to take a day or two to prepare some things before you'll need to keep your word. Meals and other anything else you need will be delivered to you."
Levi stood, and Annie took that as a cue for her to do so as well, the Corporal leading her out the door.
Once she had exited Erwin motioned for the 104th recruits to leave as well.
"Hange, I want you and your squad to set up the harpoon traps in the clearing. Do it tonight, if possible."
"Consider it done," the Squad Leader said.
"Everyone else, report the details of this meeting to your soldiers as soon as possible," Erwin said. "But just the bare minimum, however. I know that some of you are going to have objections, and before you voice them, let me say that no, I do not fully trust Annie Leonhardt's answer, but I do believe that she wants to survive more than anything, and keeping her survival tied to our main goals will ensure that she will continue to cooperate with us.
"I know how risky accepting her into our ranks is, but having her as an ally is better than as an enemy, especially if we hope to utilize her further. Rest assured, she will be well guarded."
Rico nodded. "As long as we keep that in mind, I think things will go smoothly."
"I must also ask that you tell your soldiers to treat Leonhardt as a soldier. I know that most of them will treat her as an enemy, but make sure they don't go out of their way to purposefully attack her.
"I realize that they will probably never see her as an ally of humanity, or even as someone they would be willing to work with, but for the sake of humanity, they're going to have to."
The other occupants of the room nodded in agreement.
"I still am not fully on board with this plan,"Darius said, "but I trust your judgment, Commander Smith. All of us in this room are hesitant to go along with this, but all of us want to fight for humanity."
"I understand. A large part of the reason that there are so many soldiers here if because of your support. I must ask you to voice any doubts either here, or find me in my office," Erwin said.
"Hopefully, once we retake the walls, with two shifters and a large amount of soldiers at our side, the Survey Corp can go back to fighting the titans," Hange said. "I don't like this one bit, having to put aside our goals to fight our own damn species."
"No one likes it," Marlowe said, "but at least it's something we know we can handle."
Erwin nodded. "Alright, anything else?"
No one else spoke.
"Brzenska, I want you to take Squad Six along with Squad Hange to check the traps and clear out any titans. If no one else has anything else to say, then you are all dismissed. You know where to find me if you come up with any objections," Erwin said.
He got up, walking to the doors, the rest of officers following him out and going their separate ways.
0~o~0
Eren made his way down the stairs, an unwavering, determined look in his eyes. He should be allowed to see her; who was the one who took her down and beat the Female Titan? It was him, and the Corporal was treating him like he would have some kind of mental break down if he was able to see Annie.
I'm not weak like that. There was a touch of resentment in his thoughts. I'm capable of talking to her. What, does Levi think I'll get angry or something? I won't. Anymore.
He remembered how Annie had looked when Levi and Hange had escorted her to the meeting room. Lean, gaunt even, and tired. And even though it seemed impossible, weak. But despite all that, she still looked bored, and it seemed as if to him that feigning disinterest was her natural defense mechanism. A perfect poker face was something he had never managed to keep for long.
He paused on the steps, next to a flickering torch, stopping to think. He had to answer this question now. A question he had asked himself so many times now.
Do I hate her?
The answer was no, originally. He had been upset, confused, and betrayed. Annie had actually… been somewhat nice to him, sharing her thoughts occasionally, on humanity and the military, and teaching him the skill of a martial art she had told him was called Muay Thai.
No, I can't hate someone that was once a comrade to me. I can't hate her, no matter what. I only the titans, and even if she is one of them, she's not now. She's going to fight with us and fix everything-
The deaths of the Levi Squad's members flashed through his head, making him grimace and hold onto his head, leaning against the cool, rough wall.
Damn it, Annie? Why? How am I not supposed to hate you!? How am I not supposed to view you as a monster, a cold blooded, unfeeling killer?! That look in your eyes- don't look at me that way! I don't want to fight…
Hands shaking, he sank slowly to the floor, head in his hands.
What am I supposed to do!? Can't we go back to the trainee days when the world was in black and white!? Titans and humans, the soldiers and the cowards, the good and the bad… you messed it up, Annie! You ruined all of it! And now everything's gone to hell!
How am I not supposed to want to tear you apart again!? No one will tell me what to do… why won't anyone tell me what to do?! How am I supposed to know what to do…
The dirt of our training field was holy ground, and I wish we could go back. Damn it, Annie. I know I'll get no answers, but at least talk to me.
Eren knew that talking with Annie would yield no answers, only create more. He was trying to understand her so bad, and it was driving him near insane. However, if she was truly agreeing to work with them... maybe it wouldn't be so bad.
He took a deep breath and steadied the tremors shaking his hands and then stood, smoothing down his uniform. He resumed his trip down the stairs, trailing one hand along the wall as he descended. A few minutes later, a guard escorted an angry looking man up past him. Eren paid no attention to them, walking purposely forward, and he eventually reached the bottom, and was relieved to see Mikasa standing guard. She looked slightly surprised to see him.
"Eren… "
He heard the hesitation in her voice; was his sister going to let him talk to Annie?
"Mikasa, you know why I'm here," he said. "Are you going to let me in, or not?" His voice came out harsher than he meant it to.
"I'm not going to stop you; you have the right just as anyone else does, but she's been refusing to speak with anyone for the last hour," Mikasa said, choosing her words carefully. "Are you allowed to?"
"Yeah."
"Alright, Eren... just don't lose control. It's not worth it getting worked up over her. You're not allowed to get within a yard of her. I'll be watching."
Eren nodded and walked over to the door, studying Annie through the barred window. "Hey, Annie…"
0~o~0
Annie had been refusing visitors all day. Or it could have been all night; she had no idea what the time was. The idea of food made her feel sick to her stomach, and she had neglected to eat the cold meal on the dresser at the side of the small bed. She sat on it, leaning against the bed frame, knees drawn to her chest. Both hands were chained to the floor by a long string of thick, metal links, allowing her some movement. It was, at least, better than being tied to the bed itself.
People had come in all day, yelling threats and obscenities before being forcefully escorted from outside her room by one of the soldiers. It was just after another person had been escorted away that someone walked inside
There had been the low, tense murmur of voices outside, and then familiar tones sounded through the door.
"Hey, Annie…"
She looked up for a second, seeing Eren. She waited for him to continue.
"Are you going to talk to me?"
Annie thought for a moment. She shrugged once. "Sure."
Eren looked behind him, at someone Annie couldn't see, and then he stepped back, enabling his sister to unlock the door. Her gaze promised bloody threats if anything was to happen to Eren.
This was amusing to Annie, somehow.
Eren stepped into the room, closing the door behind him. He took a step forward, then seemed to decide against it. He didn't seem to know what to do with his arms, placing them at his sides, then crossing them, and then finally stuffing them in his pockets.
"Annie-"
She cut him off immediately. "Before you ask anything, I'm probably not going to answer most of your questions, so it's best not to bother asking."
"Ok…"
Neither of them spoke for a solid two minutes, and Eren seemed to be gathering enough strength to speak to her. He sighed once, and then spoke.
"... So are you against humanity or for it, now," he asked.
"Hmmm… I don't know," Annie answered matter of factly.
"What does that even mean?" Eren half shouted.
"What does it mean?" Annie asked, crossing one leg over the other. It was unclear whether she was purposefully being cynical to infuriate Eren or not.
"Damn it, Annie, give me a straight answer," Eren says, gritting his teeth.
"How about you ask me a question I can give a straight answer to?"
"Why?" Eren asked, crossing and then uncrossing his arms.
"I can't answer that."
"Meaning you don't want to answer that."
"True," Annie said, her voice level, never rising or falling.
There was silence; it seemed Eren didn't know what to say next. He breathed out slowly.
"C'mon, Annie… why?"
"I had a mission, that's all I'll say."
Her answer made him almost explode for a second time. "A mission that you waited for years to complete!? Those years we spent training, why wait!? We were alone together so many times! I don't get it!"
"We didn't know you were the mission until then."
Eren leaned against the wall, contemplating the answer. "Ok, fine."
Silence soon invaded the room, making the air heavy and tense, though Annie appeared unbothered by it. She had expected Eren to be more angry, but it looked like he had been able to get his frustration under control. He had matured, it seemed.
It was a strange conversation, a jolting, halting talk, almost abstract in the way one participant would ruin the flow of words with a simple line. Finally, Eren spoke, his voice softer this time. It was also flat, and he made sure to stare directly at her.
"You killed a lot of people."
"I know." She responded immediately, as soon as he had finished the sentence, and her sudden answer ruined his train of thought. It was a few seconds before Eren started to talk again.
"I can't forgive that-"
"No one can."
"I can't forget that-"
"No one could."
Eren ran one hand through his hair, looking around the small room. "Since day one, even before I knew how horrible humans could be, I wanted to go outside the walls, those silent, giant guards that protected us from danger with solemn faces. They were worshipped like gods because they seemed to be supernatural. Always there, in your line of sight, at the back of your mind. Casting a bigger shadow than intended.
"And then when I found out how rotten and selfish the people around me could be, I still wanted to fight for now, when those bastards have cut the population in half again, hiding themselves behind those walls, I'll still fight for them, because when I die, I'm not going to leave behind a world solely populated by titans. I refuse to. I'm going to die and leave behind a world where humans are here alone, where there's no need for walls or even 3Dgear, and as long as I'm alive and fighting, not one more titan will enter the walls.
"I can work with you, fight with you, be a comrade with you once again, but only if I think I can trust you. Humanity is at its worst now, and because of that, we're going to have to be at our best. I'm glad you're on our side now.
"So, Annie, when we're finally ready to fight. To launch our attack on our own species, you'd better make it clear whether you're a titan or not."
Eren stood there with his mouth open, as if to say more, a slight look of shock on his face, as if he wasn't sure what he had just said. He finally shook his head once, as if to clear it, looking down at the floor.
"Interesting speech, Eren."
HIs gaze snapped up to hers. Annie had crossed her arms, her head tilted to one side.
"But let me stop you before you get to far. See, I don't want you to get caught up in any of your delusions."
Eren stepped forward, opening his mouth indignantly, but Annie snapped her fingers, effectively shushing him.
"I've said too many times, in my opinion, but I think you need reminding. Let me make this clear before you go on: I'm not on your side. I'm on my side, and my side alone. I don't fight for you. I don't fight for Erwin. I don't fight for freedom. I don't fight for humanity. I don't fight for the titans. I fight for myself, and for that alone.
"Now, it may seem like a selfish goal, but if you put in perspective, my life is really all I have. All I have to bargain, give, take, or protect. Don't try and delude yourself by trying to fix everyone else's moral compass. Remember that, Eren, and we'll understand each other just fine."
This appeared to shut him up for a few moments, and Eren didn't respond.
"Anything else you want to ask," Annie said.
"Oh… uh, yeah. So, you're really going to train me to control my titan form better?" Eren asked, his voice a bit brighter now that the subject of the conversation had receded into a hopefully less tense topic.
"That's what I said."
"So, would you be able to teach me how to use that crystal ability to harden my skin while fighting?"
"No. I don't think your titan form possesses that ability. It's not something I can teach you to do. Oh, and make sure to tell this to that insane woman … Hange. I'm not going to answer a bunch of questions about titans," Annie said.
"And… I was wondering, would you still be able to teach me now to fight, like before? I've, uh, been practicing."
Annie could've smiled at this, but she didn't. "Sure, though I'm not sure it'll be allowed."
"Well, anyway, Annie. I guess… if you're going to help save humanity, I think you can start to try and make up for what you did. I don't know if it'll change what I think of you, because, honestly, I don't know what I think of you. I guess… I have one more question."
Annie waited for him to continue.
"I doubt this one'll get an answer, but… do you think our morality is defined by our actions or what's in our hearts?"
"No one can see what's in your heart, so they judge you by your actions," Annie said, her voice flat. "That's all I have to say about that."
"I think our actions reflect what's in our-"
There was the sound of a low conversation outside, and it quickly grew loud and angry. The door suddenly burst open, and someone stormed in.
Eren turned around, and he took a step back when he saw who had entered. Corporal Levi.
"Sir!-"
"Jager. Out. Now." Levi's deathly calm voice was a sign that he was furious. His eyes flashed.
"But Corporal! There's no problem-"
"Did I say you could see the fucking titan?" Levi asked, closing the space in between him and Eren in a matter of seconds.
"No, but, I was talking-"
"You idiot. I never gave you permission to talk to her. Get out, now."
Eren gritted his teeth. "Nothing happened, Corporal. I don't know why you're angry at me. Yeah, I disobeyed orders, b-"
"Exactly, Jager. You disobeyed me. And you're still disobeying me. I told you to get out of her cell," Levi snapped.
"I was talkin-"
"I don't need to hear about you goddamn heart to heart with this beast. She's not going to tell you anything but lies. Nothing."
"You don't-"
Levi grabbed Eren by the front of his shirt and threw him out the door, slamming it shut behind him. Angered shouting ensued as Mikasa got involved.
Annie was frozen for a moment, and then she shook her head once. Don't even try, Eren. She stretched her legs out and leaned against the head board, hearing the sounds of a struggle, most likely Eren succumbing to his anger and Mikasa carrying him away. A shout echoed through the hallway.
0~o~0
"What the hell?! There's no reason fo-"
"I told you, Jager. Neither the Commander or myself granted you permission to see her," Levi said, his voice low and furious, tossing Eren into the hallway. He stumbled back and slammed into the wall.
Mikasa started forward, a dark look in her eyes. "You told me you were allowed in, Eren. To try and talk to a heartless monster."
"Dammit. We were in the middle of a conversation," Eren growled, standing. "I didn't lose control or anything. You were worried for nothing!"
"Upstairs, Jager. Now," Levi said. "Go."
"There's no use talking to a titan," Mikasa said flatly, grabbing Eren by the back of his shirt when he opened his mouth the object and walking him to the stairs. "You would have destroyed our last hope, you, if you had gotten angry and transformed, for a useless conversation. You remember how she killed them all, and then laughed when we found her out. Use your common sense, Eren. You don't even have a reason to believe anything she says."
"Dammit, Mikasa!" Eren said, jerking away from her. He placed one foot on the first stair, and then looked back, meeting Mikasa and Levi's eyes, and then turning his gaze to that small, barred window.
"If there was nothing in her heart, she would have done nothing!"
And with that, he started up the stairs, hands clenched into tight fists, passing Krista as he walked up.
0~o~0
Well, your logic is rock solid, Eren, Annie thought, listening as Levi left and Mikasa resumed her position.
