Y A M A Z A K I ' S  D I  A R Y

A/N: I've finally updated! Huzzah!

Congratulations to all the new members of the Yamazaki Monroe Fanclub who survived hazing and initiation! I salute you (Yamazaki style)! *holds up index finger and closes eyes*

Please read and review!

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September 4, 1

The most absolutely positively most dearest diary,

I have the flu. My head hurts, my tongue is swollen (because I bit it), and I feel faint. I have seen enough soap operas today to know that this is serious. I am going to write my will now.

Yamazaki's Will

To Mother and Father, I leave my fake-moustache collection, my teddy bear that Chiharu made for me, and my estate.

To Syaoran Li, I leave my Sakura Shrine. You have been an inspiration to us all.

To Sakura Kinomoto, I leave my Syaoran Shrine. You have been an inspiration to us all.

To Tomoyo Daidouji, I leave my Penguin stocks, so that she can be richer than she already is.

To Chiharu, my first love, I leave my "2¥ off" coupon for "Twin Bells".

To Naoko, I leave an IMpotent charm that I got from the Tsukimine Shrine (but I actually just made it out of cardboard now.)

To Rika, I leave my rifle collection.

To Terada, I leave my homework.

To Kaho, I leave my best wishes.

To Yukito, I leave my refrigerator.

To Touya, I leave my Yukito.

To Eriol, I leave NOTHING! In your face!

Now that I've finished that, I can pass on into the next life without fear of my possessions going to the wrong people. Wow, I think I hear the Grim Reaper knocking on my figurative door.

Goodbye, faithful inanimate object. If I could have you buried alive with my, I would.

It wasn't death. It was just Eriol! Apparently, he heard that I was sick and came to bring me my homework. He says it is all due tomorrow. Funny, we usually don't get work on Sunday…

Well, I guess he isn't SO bad after all, since he went to all that trouble to bring me my work. Maybe he doesn't want to scare me out of an education after all! What a good friend, maybe I should leave him something in my Will.

To Eriol, I leave NOTHING! In your face! my two yachts.

There, all fixed. Now, I need to call Chiharu and ask her about question one, since I don't remember being taught about atomic mass.

Chiharu says that we don't have any homework. As if I am supposed to believe that! She even said that we didn't even have school today! She is going to fail in life with that attitude. Not me, though. I am going to the top. In fact, I feel better right now! I think I will go to school!

I am at school now. Mr Madei, the custodian tried to make me leave, but I escaped and am hiding beneath the music teacher's desk. I just heard a scream; I think he found my trap. You see, I spilled oil all over the floor in case he came this way. Now it's just a matter of staying alive. Yes...

I think I will write "study hall" on the board like I did once before. Ah, it seems like so long ago. I miss those days of study halls and detentions. Now, as I sit here hiding from Madei, I realize that by coming to school, I have ruined my life. Eriol once told me that "in a world where ignorance is bliss, t'is folly to seek wisdom", or something like that.

Mother is here now. She wants me to put down the meter stick and to come home. Well I can't do three things at once! I am still writing in the diary, can't she see? Oh, no! She is trying to take you away! Noooo!!

Love,

Yamaza—

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A/N: Review! And Yamazaki might leave you something in his will! ^_^;