the mermaid | by kay wiz | LESSONS

"Arguing with a fool proves there are two."
— Doris M. Smith —


Kagome sighed heavily, pausing for a single moment to wipe the putrid, sticky sweat from her brow. She winced up at the burning sun, groaning mentally – she did not have the energy to do it out loud – as she realized there was not a single bit of shade in her general vicinity. Her long sleeves were already rolled up to her shoulders by her grubby hands, her hair tied high on top of her head. She had long ago rid her feet of her socks and shoes, and they were now bare and muddy from her previous chore of planting rice, one that exhausted her quickly because she really, really needed to learn how to stay in shape.

She stared at the unscathed wooden training pole in front of her, panting with fatigue as her hands' pink glow began to fade away. She muttered a quick curse under her breath, beginning to panic at the lack of energy she was creating. She pushed herself, her hands glowing suddenly with a burst of light before dying out soon afterward.

"Do not overdo it," Kaede ordered calmly without even breaking a sweat, and Kagome wondered if she was seriously the only one around who could feel how hot it was. "Take your time and relax."

Kagome just sighed again. She had asked Kaede herself to help train her so she could be strong enough to help Sesshoumaru regenerate his arm, but she had no idea it would be so difficult, not to mention tiring. This bit of training in itself was supposed to test the strength and control of her miko abilities, and if she succeeded in performing this technique, she could use it in an offensive battle. But just how was she supposed to master this skill if she was so damn exhausted?

Planting rice to begin with was a heavy task, one she insisted she could do alone, despite Inuyasha's protests (he had since returned from wherever he was that morning, but he hadn't told her a thing about what he was doing exactly). She was not physically strong, and she tired easily. She had hoped it would be a nice start to discipline her work ethic by doing her own planting in the fields, but she was beginning to wonder if she maybe started a little too big.

Whether the pressure on herself worked or not, she couldn't say. In fact, she couldn't say much at all, considering the state she was in. She talked Kaede into training her already – and immediately after her planting of rice – and she had to force herself to remember her personal goal in order to not regret asking Kaede in the first place.

She tried again, closing her eyes and focusing her ki to move into her right palm. It was a slow process, but a successful one that tickled her skin with the movement of her miko energy coursing through her veins. Her fingertips twitched at the familiar warmth gathering there, and although her eyes were shut calmly, she could still feel the pink color. It was a strange feeling she had somehow grown accustomed to, but it was something so difficult to explain, even in her head, that the only words describing it was that she was feeling a color.

"That's it," Kaede muttered loudly enough for Kagome to hear through her focused state. "That's it…"

With the encouraging words from the elder miko, Kagome concentrated, the glowing light in her hand growing steadily to the size of a tennis ball. Just a bit more, she thought to herself, sending out a sort of mental wave into her arm, causing the light to grow even larger. She continued to pant with exhaustion, but her task was near completion, and the pink blaze had almost filled her entire palm.

"That's it!" Kaede's proud smile was mirrored in her voice. "Go on, now."

Her eyes snapped open, but her lack of physical energy made them droop soon after. She began to walk, one foot slowly passing the other in a weak step, but she refused to give up now. Her paced steps sped up as she moved along, and they continued to quicken until she was nearly sprinting with anticipation. Her panting grew heavier as she willed herself to keep going, hoping the ball of light in her hand would stay strong for just a little while longer.

She was nearing the six-foot Muk Yan Jong protruding from the dirt ground, and she was hurrying towards it rapidly. Just yards away from it, she lifted her glowing hand behind her head, running faster and faster and preparing herself for the impact with the wood in front of her. She positioned herself, just about to come in contact with the training pole, and then—

She stepped on a rock.

She stumbled, the annoyingly painful jabs into her bare foot distracting her and pissing her off to no end, and although her miko energy had successfully barged into the vertical log right in front of her, her power was not enough because of her stagger. She looked up slowly, scowling at her injured foot as her ki quickly evaporated from her palm and disappeared altogether, and the sight before her made her look down all over again.

The dent in the log was not even the size of a golf ball. In fact, it was barely even the size of a gumball. And it was not particularly deep, either.

She cried out frustratingly. All that time and energy, all that sweat and hard work, and she had barely done a thing, thanks to her little slip-up and that damn rock!

Kaede came up behind her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Do not worry, Kagome. You have worked much too hard today. Perhaps it is time to stop for now."

"No!" she cried immediately, barely leaving a paused between Kaede's words and her own. She had to master her powers before the next week and a half were up! Once Sango returned, she knew they would all have to leave to hunt for the Shikon shards, and Sesshoumaru would be long gone. She needed to learn these skills as soon as possible or she would never be able to help the taiyoukai, no matter how strange it sounded.

"Kagome, take a rest. Perhaps you should return to your time for a while and relax."

"No!" She sat on her knees, her hands on the ground in front of her, and she looked up at Kaede. "I haven't reached my limit yet! I can do it again, you just watch!" She began to stand up, struggling quite a bit, considering she was still drained and it was only just past noon, which was the hottest point of the day.

"Kagome," the elder miko said again, "you have no more energy in you. You will most likely not recover until much later tonight, when you will be…preoccupied. I suggest you go home and bathe, and I will speak to Inuyasha about letting you rest for the remainder of the day."

"But the work—" Kagome looked up, horrified and still trying to stand.

"The work will be taken care of." Kaede bent down, holding out a hand for Kagome to grab onto. The younger priestess refused it and pushed herself to the near limit in order to stand on her own, which she finally accomplished, though she looked like she would topple all over again if the wind would just blow a little stronger.

"Inuyasha won't be—"

"I shall speak with him."

Kagome sighed loudly, giving in very reluctantly. She nodded carefully to avoid any oncoming headaches, and began to walk back to the village, stumbling with fatigue. Kaede followed, stepping in front of her so she would stop. Bringing her hand to Kagome's forehead, she focused her own invisible ki to mesh with Kagome's own pink and dwindling one, supplying the tiniest bit of energy in her, enough so she could walk on her own.

"Thanks, Kaede," Kagome smiled weakly, not completely amazed at the action, as she could also perform that same technique herself. She had learned some skills over the last two years, but it was the difficult ones she wished to master.

"Come along, Kagome," Kaede suggested quietly, and the trainee followed her temporary shishou without complaint.


Sesshoumaru stood from his current spot at the base of the tree, thoughts of Hanabi swimming through his head, no pun intended (because Sesshoumaru did not joke, after all). That wretched girl, plaguing him like she was!

Jaken and Rin watched him as he moved for the first time in hours, since the reappearance of Inuyasha, to be exact. Ah-Uhn still slept, basking in the warmth of the sun shining through the treetops.

Sesshoumaru blinked slowly, wanting to shake himself so he could be rid of his thoughts of that vixen of a mermaid. She would not be on his mind any further, he decided. Whatever it took to think of something else for a change would be welcome to him.

He turned away from his wards, walking away in his usual paced tempo. He needed to get out of here, away from this area where he was caught stroking that lily of hers and where Inuyasha learned a bit about her. He refused to think about it. He refused to be reminded of her.

"My lord!" Jaken screeched. "Where are you going?"

"Silence, Jaken."

"Yes, my lord!"

Jaken began to pick up Ah-Uhn's reins, Rin watching and waiting, but Sesshoumaru's words cut them short.

"Stay here."

The others watched his back disappear, staring at him innocently until his form was out of view completely. Sesshoumaru was aware of their gaze, but it did not unnerve him. His mind was too preoccupied with his frustrations, he did not bother to care.

Hanabi.

No, she was not to be thought of! She was not to be puzzled about any longer, and she was not to be obsessed about. He was not supposed to look forward to their meeting tonight, and she was not supposed to make him feel so inferior just by smiling at him. That lily in his pocket and the handmade necklace hidden beneath his armor were just ordinary tokens, nothing special.

He was not sure what he despised most: the frustrating and new feelings stirring inside him, or the way he thought he could lie to himself in the first place.

He stared into space without paying attention to where he was going, no thanks to his obnoxious thoughts, and he had walked for over a quarter of an hour by the time he realized where he was.

He could see a clearing straight ahead. It was the clearing, the one where he disappeared to for the past three nights – four, if he counted tonight. He had tried before, and there was no use trying again: the barrier that led him to the lake was nonexistent during the daytime.

All the same, he growled at the irony of it. He had walked to escape his thoughts of Hanabi, yet he had subconsciously brought himself to the very place where he first spotted her.

He turned to leave and walk away from the dreadful place, but a scent lingered on his sensitive nose, and he was surprised of how long it took for him to catch it. It was Inuyasha's wench again. Was it not enough that he had to be bothered by her and her companions just yesterday? She was a nuisance, he had decided throughout the time span in which he knew she existed.

His gaze intensified in concentration as he remembered that first time he came to this clearing, before he had seen Hanabi. He had detected that girl's scent nearby, her presence disappearing from somewhere in this clearing. Perhaps she came here often?

His delicate and pointed ears picked up the sound of rustling paper. Paper? Why would the miko have paper, unless it was some sort of sutra? But something was off, he noted. He was aware of the sound of such paper, considering all the books and scrolls in his father's old library, not to mention the sutras present in all the futile missions to exorcise him, but the sound of this paper was…strange. It did not sound the same, but it was paper nonetheless.

Curious, Sesshoumaru brought himself closer to the edge of the clearing, hearing the sound again not long after. He came closer and closer to it, the miko's undeniable scent becoming clearer to his clouded senses.

He took one last step, bringing his body next to a tree just in view of the girl. His golden eyes widened minutely at the sight of her. He was not surprised by her looks, as she seemed exactly the same as always, in those strange and degrading clothes of hers. He was not surprised that she was alone, knowing his irritable half-brother. He was, rather, surprised at what she held in her hands:

A book.

The girl was reading a book!

How was that possible? How was such a common and vulgar girl capable of reading such a thick text? She looked calm reading it, and so very used to it. She did not seem overly-captivated by the story, and it was as though she had read many such things before.

Sesshoumaru was aware of the limits of education for both humans and demons. Both could read simple things, such as prices and a few words written on signs, but very few of each could easily and effortlessly be able to read sentences of kanji and be able to understand them, let alone an entire book. And so casually, she was reading it!

The girl turned the page, not yet noticing his presence so close to her. She was really a very ridiculous miko, not even noticing him. He wouldn't be surprised if she was attacked and killed without her even realizing it, but it was not something he worried himself over; as far as he was concerned, there would be one less human in the world if that happened.

Listening again to the sound of the turning page, his eyes narrowed in suspicion and confusion. The pages were not made of the same rice paper he was accustomed to. They looked smoother and less yellow; they were a genuine white, and the kanji was written with such a precision that each stroke was not smeared, but, rather, perfectly written. The ink did not look like the kind he had seen either, and not a single bit of the book's words looked like they had been written with a brush; not even the thinnest of them could have written such small kanji.

The girl sighed, pausing in her reading to take a breather and look around. It was awhile before she looked in his direction, but once she did, she made a double-take, her eyes widening significantly. She blinked a few times, as though trying to make certain he was really there, but even when reality seemed to crash on her, she did not run or cry out for Inuyasha, something that rather startled Sesshoumaru.

The entire time she watched him, he remained still and stoic, only moving to look down at her once she regained composure.

She gaped for a few more seconds – looking even more ridiculous than usual, he mentally added – before quietly forming the words she struggled to speak.

"Sesshoumaru," she said calmly, although still utterly shocked, "what the hell are you doing here?"


Kagome mentally praised herself for not stuttering, like she thought she would, but also wished she hadn't blurted it out the way she had. Her bad mouth was probably just reminding him why he hated humans so much. Whoops.

But honestly, she thought as she blushed from his disapproving look at her, what on earth was Sesshoumaru doing there? Surely he was much too busy to bother himself with someone like her.

She had come here to this familiar clearing in hopes for silence and relaxation, once she had finished bathing and had grabbed an easy-to-read book from her shelf; she was still completely exhausted from her earlier training, and she refused to read something complicated. Speaking of which, she was so tired that she had not even sensed Sesshoumaru's presence. It would not do, she realized, for her to be so clueless while by herself and surrounded in a youkai-filled area.

Kagome blinked at Sesshoumaru's lack of response. He said nothing, but instead moved closer slowly – albeit with long strides – staring at the book in her hands all the while. Kagome fidgeted, still sitting in the grass. If this wasn't awkward, she didn't know what was. She couldn't stand such tension.

"Well, what is it?" she bit out rudely, a bit frustrated under his scrutinizing gaze. She immediately tensed, her eyes widening as she grit her teeth. Idiot, she thought to herself. He's going to crush me!

She looked up at him, catching his heated glare. He did not respond to her impolite words, opting to move his gaze back to the open book in her hands yet again.

"Read it."

Kagome blinked up at him, her uneasy face settling to one of confusion. "What, out loud?" Sesshoumaru glared again, and she regretted her words for the third time in a row. "Uh, I mean…yeah, sure!" She stammered a bit, shaking her head and clearing her throat nervously. You would think he would be easy to remain calm in front of, considering all that's happened between us these past few nights.

"Uh, let's see…" she muttered to herself again, trying to find the beginning of a sentence, aware of the taiyoukai's stare as he read the kanji himself – and upside-down, no less – as he stood in front of her. He seemed to be checking if she was reading correctly, the insufferable demon.

Clearing her throat one last time, she read aloud. Her voice was smooth and clear, and she only hesitated when her tongue got tangled and she slipped up her words a little (it was hard not to slip up with a gorgeous, scary demon hovering over her shoulder). All her years in reciting textbooks during school had taught her how to be efficient in her literary skills.

She finished a sentence and paused to swallow, but when she opened her mouth again to continue, she only got a word or two out before she was interrupted. And she had only read about two paragraphs, too!

"That's quite enough, Miko." Sesshoumaru's words were sharp and annoyed, successfully halting Kagome in her smooth reciting. He seemed bothered, as though the thought of her reading in general was ridiculous, and that she was tricking him somehow by doing what he asked her to do in the first place.

Kagome couldn't stop the glare she directed at him. "Hey, you're the one who asked me to read, and I've done it. You don't have to be so rude about it!"

Sesshoumaru scowled at her, baring his fangs as he lifted a dangerous and clawed hand. He grabbed the collar of her shirt, roughly forcing her to stand, the book grasped by her fingers. He brought her close and glowered at her before pushing her away and looking back down to the book.

Kagome had to catch her breath after being handled the way she was, and she rubbed the base of her throat, irritated and making it very clear that she was so. Sesshoumaru paid her no mind, but instead flipped to another random page, successfully losing her place in the book, and pointed at a spot, silently commanding that she read it.

"Uggh!" she growled at him, shoving his hand away from her precious text. He growled himself, in response, his eyes flashing dangerously. Kagome blinked nervously, catching that she was being just as rude as he was, and that he would possibly kill her if she didn't just shut up and do what she was told. All the same, she hated being forced into obedience, especially by someone who was acting as spoiled as that ruddy Sesshoumaru was.

She never would have guessed that such a kind, gentle demon that spoke to "Hanabi" would suddenly transform during the daytime, as she did, into someone so impolite and infuriating. But what could she do about him? What choice did she have now?

She began to read once again.


Sesshoumaru clenched his fists beside him, thanks to the troublesome girl in front of him. She was entirely frustrating. If she could just obey her superiors and read that damn book of hers without complaint, he would not be so willing to break her neck and shut her up. If he did that, though, he would never gain all the proof he needed that the miko could actually read.

She was proving, so far, that she could indeed comprehend the kanji, but he refused to believe it so easily. She was reading so clearly and without falter, but he rejected the idea that it was possible, and that, perhaps, she could even read better than he.

Maybe she had just memorized that page she was on before. He would trick that girl and flip the page, making her "read" something she had not prepared herself for.

There was no way Inuyasha's wench could be so…educated.

He glared at the girl one more time, and she submitted, reading the next few sentences he commanded she read. He watched as her eyes darted up and down as she moved from kanji to kanji, her intense stare at the characters never shifting. Her diction was quite good, he was reluctant to admit, and her voice was loud and clear.

"That's enough," Sesshoumaru interrupted again. He fumed, frustrated because that silly girl of a miko had read once again, and he had read the kanji himself to make sure she wasn't just making up the story as she went along. He was furious to admit that she had read correctly, word for word. Maybe she had memorized the entire book.

One more test, he decided, flipping the pages once again to a spot somewhere in the middle. Pointing to a new set of kanji, he glared as she, as usual, gave one straight back before looking down again and reading, not putting up another argument, which Sesshoumaru was grateful for.

She continued, her voice obviously irritated and huffy, most likely at his rudeness. He didn't feel guilty whatsoever. She read and read, and he didn't stop her as quickly as before. He was determined to allow her to recite the words in her book for as long as it took for her to make an error. But her reading was flawless. She did not hesitate upon any difficult word, nor did she mispronounce anything. At times, the flow of her words shifted, and she would speed up or slow down or stumble a bit over her tongue, but none of these slip-ups were any excuse for him to lash out at her, although he very much wanted to.

"Miko," Sesshoumaru angrily interrupted for the last time, "your book makes no sense whatsoever." And it didn't, because it kept saying things about disappearing cats and children turning into pigs and really, what kind of nonsense was this girl reading?

She looked up from her book and gave him a sharp, angry look. "First of all, my name is Kagome, not Miko." The taiyoukai simply looked away, far from amused. "And second, my book does make perfect sense. It's supposed to be funny, and something can't be funny unless it makes sense, you know, at least not in books."

"It's ridiculous, not humorous," he bit back at her, his temper easily rising with every second he stayed in her presence. There was something about her that infuriated him, and her know-it-all attitude was definitely not helping. He was not amused with how she was able to keep up with him in both reading and comebacks, because she was a human and humans were obviously below youkai in every way possible.

The girl, Kagome, cried out at him, making frustrated noises in the back of her throat. "Do I have to remind you again that you were the one who wanted me to read this to you in the first place? If you have so many problems with it, you don't need to waste time for either of us simply because you think I—"

"How is it that you can read?"

She blinked, pausing and staring up at him as though his question made less sense than that book of hers, when, in fact, he believed it to be a very logical question, and one in dire need of an answer.

"What's it to you?" she stalled, her eyes narrowing in his direction as she stuttered only slightly.

"I suggest," he continued, "you answer my question without complaint, Miko."

The word alone made her blush with anger, and he noticed her gnawing at her lip, struggling to keep her ludicrous words to herself, but to no avail. "Kagome!" she corrected. "And I do believe that it's none of your business whether I can read or not!"

Sesshoumaru glowered at her, his fangs shining in the sunlight dangerously. How dare this inferior girl defy him. He was her lord (he believed) and a taiyoukai who could so easily destroy her without a passing glance, and she dared to speak to him the way she was. "You will tell me, Miko, why it is you can read."

"My name is Kagome!" she cried, loud enough to scare some birds from their places on branches in the trees. She angrily threw herself at him, her hands pink and glowing.

Sesshoumaru stared, not entirely surprised by her ki, but more so because he had never seen her use her hands with her power at the same time. Before he could blink, though, the light had vanished, and the girl instead ran straight into his chest.

His eyes glowed red.


Sesshoumaru's metal breastplate jammed into Kagome's sides, whisking her breath away as she gasped for air to recover. She tensed, aware that she had just collided straight with a very dangerous taiyoukai, and that she couldn't even hold her miko energy in her hand for longer than a second because she was already so weak and tired from the morning's activities and training.

I'm screwed!

She looked up slowly, book still in hand, and tensed even more at the blood red color of his eyes. She shivered nervously, terrified for her life. She had seen his eyes, as well as Inuyasha's, in that shade before, but despite her familiarity with the sight, she had never been more afraid in her whole life.

She was alone, alone and powerless, and she was the main cause of his anger. She had never been at the receiving end of those burning eyes filled with bloodlust, and she had never been as defenseless as she was now. Even if she had her arrows with her, she highly doubted she could defend herself without her energy.

She opened her mouth to call for Inuyasha, but she couldn't find her words; she was still out of breath from the collision with Sesshoumaru's spiked chest. She took a step back slowly, hoping to calm him down enough so she could flee, but her resistance was, indeed, futile.

One of Sesshoumaru's sharp claws shot out so quickly, she couldn't even pick up the action, and he grabbed her by the neck tightly, lifting her to his eye level. Her book dropped to the ground, pages landing first, but Kagome didn't notice as she automatically moved her hands up to grab onto Sesshoumaru's wrist, maroon stripes painted on his flesh.

She whimpered softly, unable to tear her frightened eyes away from his deadly ones. There was no possible way this could be the same Sesshoumaru who had treated her so kindly every night. She didn't know this demon. He was a stranger to her.

Although she was scared, her temper definitely did not disappear. It only grew as she became bitter at this Sesshoumaru, a feeling similar to hatred bubbling in her chest. She did not know this demon at all! Whether he knew it or not, he was betraying her and her trust, and she glared at him through her horrified stare.

Sesshoumaru did not seem to notice, or if he did, he did not care. He ran his index finger against the creamy flesh of her throat, slicing it open enough so it bled. She hissed at the stinging pain, her grip on his wrist tightening reflexively.

"Your insolence is unnecessary, Miko," he growled at her. His voice was deeper than usual, and anger seeped through; it was an anger so frightening, Kagome could not help but shudder with terror. She was thankful tears did not prick her eyes; she was never one who wanted to be seen as a coward, especially because she was among the weakest of her friends.

She wanted to cry out, but she still couldn't, in her situation. She was bleeding just a little, but why couldn't Inuyasha smell it? Why wasn't he coming for her? She was desperate for help, struggling to get away from the taiyoukai's deadly claws.

Sesshoumaru did not bode well with her struggling, and his grip tightened around her throat, choking her and causing her to cough before she regained her ability to breathe shallowly.

Sesshoumaru growled lowly and threateningly at her, and her hatred for him grew. It burned her chest and crushed the friendly feelings for him that she had somehow gotten a hold of after those few nights. She looked down at his own neckline, spotting a very familiar handmade necklace beneath his armor, and she had never been more infuriated in her life.

There was no way this was the same Sesshoumaru.

She cried out angrily, finally finding her voice, but no words. She clawed at his wrist, although he did not flinch, and she thrashed and kicked at his armor, making sure to avoid the sharp spikes at the top. She grunted with every kick she gave, digging her nails into his flesh at every second, and she ignored the flow of blood from her neck – the cut had gotten deeper the more she struggled, but that was not an accident.

Sesshoumaru's eyes flashed in their terrifying state as he growled loudly and angrily. He intentionally slashed his claws against her throat, rewarding her with numerous shallow, but bloody, cuts.

Kagome did not let up on her actions, going on a rampage powered by her disgust and loathing. Her attacks were useless and did not harm him, but they successfully angered him to the point when he could not take it any longer, and he roughly threw her to the floor.

She gasped at the contact, the grass not cushioning her fall in the slightest. Her neck stung painfully, and her back seemed to be bruised, considering how hard he had thrown her. She was a yard or two away from him now, flat on her back and unable to get up quickly. She had reached her limit now, exhaustion piling on her and adding to every ache in her body.

Sesshoumaru took long strides toward her, his eyes softening to pink, though it was obviously forced. He kicked her book to land right beside her before standing at her feet, glowering down at her.

"You should learn your place, Miko," he said calmly and softly, although it was the most frightening voice Kagome had ever heard. "I should annihilate you right this second, but I will resist."

Kagome found her voice, but it was strangled and soft. "Why?" she whispered, still angrily and full of hatred. "Why don't you just kill me now and get it over with?" She immediately regretted her words. She did not wish to die, especially not at his hands. Thankfully, he did not attack again.

"Next time, I shall kill you." His eyes narrowed even sharper. "You are to be kept alive for now, but only because of Inuyasha."

Kagome stared up at him, gasping for air. "W-what?"

He ignored her and continued. "In every battle I have had with him, I have been able to harm him so wonderfully." His eyes grew darker for a split second. "And it is all thanks to you, Miko." She shuddered, gaping and trying to catch her breath. She was at loss for words. She did not understand, nor did she want to, but Sesshoumaru continued nonetheless. "The hanyou must always waste his time in saving your 'precious' life." His stare became serious and cynical, and Kagome's eyes widened in realization. She didn't want to hear the words she knew were true. "You never fail to get in his way. You are a weakness, you are a hindrance, and you are a burden."

Kagome lost her breath again, without her even realizing it. Every word Sesshoumaru had uttered just now was true, down to the dot.

She was a burden.

Everything seemed to click at his words: why Inuyasha had always yelled at her; why her friends always had her do the dirty work, or why they would use her as a babysitter, rather than show up in battle. It was why they all got hurt…why Inuyasha always had to get hurt. It was why Inuyasha could never be happy. It was why Inuyasha could never be with Kikyou without screwing things up. It was why…

Everything was her fault.

You are a burden.

"So I shall not kill you now."

Kagome shut her eyes tightly, the rest of her remaining still as salty tears leaked from beneath her closed eyelids. She did not take notice in Sesshoumaru leaving her in the clearing, storming off angrily with his eyes still pink with frustration.

You never fail to get in his way.

What was she but a nuisance? What was she but something else to protect? What was she but a useless shard-detector that always, always, always got in the way?

You are a weakness.

She sat up from her place in the grass, careful of her bruised back. Her tears of self-pity flowed from her eyes, dripping down beneath her chin and mixing with her bloody neck. Her hands twisted around each other in her lap, nearly cutting off her circulation.

You are a hindrance.

She didn't know why she was crying like this. She was just proving herself to be just as weak as everyone seemed to believe she was. And it was all his fault.

Sesshoumaru.

He had frustrated her, commanded her, terrified her, degraded her, hurt her. Where was the Sesshoumaru from the lake? Where was his kindness, his compassion? Where were his words, and where was his embrace?

Where was Sesshoumaru?

And now he had put the truth right in her face, and she couldn't handle it any longer. She didn't know why she was here. She didn't know why she was just lying around, why she seemed to think it was okay to be lazy and read peacefully when there were more important things going on, more important things she should be doing.

No, no more. She would need to train harder than ever, no longer to help Sesshoumaru, but to help herself. She would not let his words be true any longer. She refused to be what he said she was. She would train harder than ever, and she would prove herself. She would be able to hold out on her own, and she would no longer cause harm to her friends.

She would not cause harm to Inuyasha.

She would show that damn Sesshoumaru. She would show them all. Sesshoumaru was wrong. He was wrong.

She looked at the book at her side, sprawled on the ground face-down. Her tears flowed freely now, and she bent her knees upward, hugged them to her, and buried her head within them.

This would be the last time she cried.

This would be the last time she got in the way.

This would be the last time Sesshoumaru would accuse her of such things.

Her shoulders shook, her hair curtained her face, and she sobbed.

You are a burden.


A/N: Revised. It was a little hard to do this one, since I was editing a chapter about a really hot and sunny day when in reality, I was sitting – soaking wet because I was stupid enough to forget an umbrella or a hood or something – on campus in the pouring rain. Well, that's San Francisco for you, I guess.

I know I've had a really messy way of writing POVs in this story, but hopefully it's a little cleaner and easier to understand in this chapter. It always bugs me when Kagome and Sesshoumaru's thoughts go back and forth, but I'm always too lazy to fix it. Hmmm.

Fun fact: this original chapter came out on the one-year anniversary of this story. It's a shame there's been so little posts since then (oops) but I'm going to try to update a thousand times faster! But don't hold me to it hahaha