A/N: Hey, welcome back, kiddies.
So did you all see the previews for the new South Park episode this week? It's called The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs. It seems like I'm not the only one who has taken a liking to long, crazy titles.

Speaking of long things (get your mind out of the gutter, kiddies) this chapter isn't. It's actually the shortest chapter of them all. The one that's 1,088 words. But it's also one of my favorites, for like no reason. I just like the way it ends. XD
So, yeah, I'll update this puppy again on Wednesday, in time for the new SP, and again on Friday, in time for my birthday. I wanna know how old you all think I'm turning, so leave your guess in a review. ;D

Enjoy!


VII. Pyramids

"Yes," he said, somewhat seriously, dismounting me quickly. He opened the glass cabinet door that was under his entertainment center, where there were stacks of games and games and games and more games.

"Up for a little bit of Wii Sports?" I asked. "I'm a mean Wii bowler. Or maybe some Tekken 6, if you're up to it?"

Kevin turned around, smirking. "How are you so sure I have those games?"

"Um, everyone has them?" I said. Well, that wasn't necessarily true, Tweek doesn't have any gaming systems because they're too expensive and he thinks that the underpants gnomes are in league with the Nintendo manufacturers, Craig really only has an Xbox and a Wii and is saving up for a PS3, and Token has like four PS3's, two Xbox 360's, a PlayStation 2, and some other crap imported from Europe that doesn't even exist in the US, unless it's in Token's house.

"I don't own anything that comes after the fifth generation," Kevin said.

That didn't sound very good. "F-Fifth generation?"

Kevin stood up straight and acted, again, like he was about to tell me the most life-changing thing on the planet. "Meaning, I don't own anything newer than a Nintendo 64."

I thought I was suffering of heart failure. "You mean… no PS3? No Wii? No Xbox? Not even a damn PlayStation 2?" How could this guy live with himself? First vinyl records, now this?

Every kid freaks out about gaming systems. Every kid wants to have the latest gaming system, because it's cool, right? Where did Kevin Stoley go wrong, of all people? He was the last person I'd expected to be this old school.

"Well, yeah," Kevin said. "I'm just not into the new stuff. It's too flashy for me. I stick with the classics, 'cause I grew up with 'em. Are you getting me here?"

"Too flashy?" I said. "Too flashy? Dude, the new generation is like incredibly incredible, not flashy. I mean, if you're gonna judge new games, you should at least own a few."

"Oh, no," Kevin spoke loudly, stepping closer. "You are not starting something with me, are you? Because I can go on about this forever, I'll tell you that right now."

"I'm not starting anything with you, I was just saying that you shouldn't be judging video games that you don't own, let alone have played."

"I'm not judging any games, I was just saying," bastard started to mock me, and you could freaking tell, "that those games just aren't my style, alright? Is that alright with you, Clyde?"

"Myehmyehmyehmyehmyeh," I teased, moving my hand up and down like a blabbering puppet, "Myehmyehmyehmyeh - no. Do you honestly expect—" I began to laugh a little bit, "—expect me to play two-dimensional baby games on an ancient granny system?" I thought for a moment how the phrase "baby games" may have cancelled out the term "granny system," but I was hoping that Kevin wouldn't quite catch that.

"You're really annoying, do you know that?" Kevin said. He crossed his arms, nay, he put his hands on his hips. He put his hands on his hips. What kind of guy put his hands on his hips? "How do I even put up with you? I mean, do you think you're really making yourself come off as intelligent when you just put down classic games like that? I never said I hated new games, and I'm only a little sorry if you get butthurt if I even imply that I do. Classic games are fantastic, because I appreciate the simplicity and efficiency of the games; think of it as, the Egyptians building pyramids out of nothing but close-cut stone, perfectly cut to fit one on top of the other without having to use cement. You know why? Because cement wasn't even frickin' invented yet, and yet they managed to create the pyramids out of nothing but their natural resources. And the pyramids are kick-ass. And what's kick-ass? Classic games are kick-ass. Hardly any of the advanced game-programming software was invented, yet they managed to create fun, simple games."

"Are you quite finished?" I asked. I looked at him with the same unimpressed gaze as I gave him when he explained his philosophy of zebras. Kevin seemed to have a habit of rambling. And I would be lying if I said I didn't like that. I only acted like I didn't, because any normal person might have gotten annoyed with so much talking and so little listening - but I liked watching his lips move. He spoke like he meant it.

"Yes, yes, I am," he finally said. He began to wind down. I don't know if it was just hot in the room or something, but he was sweating now. It might have been the energy from dancing before, I don't know. Maybe he was just a generally warm person. "Do you want to play video games or not?"

"Yeah, I wanna play video games," I replied. I set myself up a comfy little personal square on the carpet, and sat Indian style.

"You're unbelievable," Kevin breathed.

"I know." And then I thought it might have been a good time to tell him that I was staying over. "Oh, yeah, by the way, I'm crashing here for the night, if that's alright with you."

Kevin was in front of me, going through games again - he suddenly stopped. Without looking at me, he asked, "And who decided this?"

That was a very good question, what Kevin asked. If I could trace back correctly, I do think it was my mom, first, who asked me if I was staying over, and I kind of, just… agreed. This is what I tell him.

"You didn't even ask me if I had anything planned for tonight or tomorrow," Kevin said. "I could have gone out to save the world tonight, for all you know."

"And you wouldn't let me come and save the world with you?" I said. "Dick."

And for a second, I regretted just calling him a dick. He got offended by "geek," who knows what he's going to ramble on about now that that slipped out?

He just laughed.

I decided then that Kevin was a strange, strange guy.