NOTES: At first I thought Shingyouji will return to Misu after some few chapters but seems like this will be a long way to go


After some thought Shingyouji decide to avoid Misu for many days, he knows that once Leo come back everything will be back to normal, he can't take the advice of Hayama breaking up with Leo, not now he does not want to be the cause the man's pain besides no one can never love him the way Leo did.

"What's with mood?"

As he heard the voice who asked him that question Shingyouji looks at him and it was Leo to his surprise.

"Tanaka-san I thought you'll stay for a month in America."

"And miss all your drama? Never" Leo smiled and hugged his boyfriend.

Shingyouji totally forgot everything that his senpai told him and enjoys his lover's return, they decide to take a stroll in the hall and Leo talks about the stuffs that he learned during the program, he even mention about his family missing them when he had returned there. Their conversation was cut when Misu arrived looking sad.

"Arata-san what happened?"

"The head of the orphanage we are helping he passed away last night."

"What?"

"This could be a bad news especially for the kids, he had been with them for many years this was a big loss for everyone."

"Well that's petrifying some news for me to know after I return."

"When's the funeral?"

"Two days from now, I want to help organizing it, will you do that as well Tanaka-san, Shingyouji."

Shingyouji and Leo look at each other and nod to Misu. Since they can only help after their class Shingyouji feels sorry about the kids since they have grown to love their head who is a kind man. Leo and Misu seems to forget their earlier animosity for the sake of helping the kids, even Gii with his lover and best friend decides to help as well.

On the day of the funeral there we're a lot of people who had attended the place. Shingyouji stands in front to say something.

"This place had meant something for us, the kids had loved this old man because of his dedication and devotion taking care of them, it was a big loss even to us Abe-san wherever you are we'll always miss you, one of the kids here would also like to say a few words about this kind old man." Shingyouji returned to his seat beside Leo and helped the kid to read his letter to the late head of the orphanage.

"I miss my sister. The smell of his shampoo. The way I could always convince him to read meanother book. When you love some like I loved her they're a part of you it's like you're attached by this invisible tether and no matter how far away you are you can always feel them and now every time I reach for that tether I know there's no one on the other end and I feel like I'm falling into nothingness and then I remember Ojii-chan. I remember a life lead with no enemies, no resentments, no regrets and I'm inspired to get up out of bed and go on. We miss him so much it feels like piece of us has been ripped off. Just one more time we want to hold him. Just ten more seconds— is that too much to ask? For ten more seconds to hold him? But we can't and we won't and the only thing keeping us from being swallowed whole by sadness is that Ojii-chan would kill me us if we did. So for now we're just going to miss him. We love you, Ojii-chan. Rest in peace."

The kid is still crying when he return back to his seat, after the funeral they all return back to their dorm room.

"Hey Shingyouji I am proud of you, I can't believe you organize those things."

"Yeah I know." Shingyouji started to have tears in his face.

"Why are you crying?"

"I am crying because I am breaking up with you." Shingyouji suddenly told him.

"Is it because of Misu? I can handle your confusion until you finally got over him."

"Tanaka-san."

"I know you had lied to me before but I forgive you, because I love you so much that I don't want to lose you, you can't even look me in the eye when I had asked you about kissing him before."

"When I heard that kid's speech I felt that invisible tether between me and Arata-san, that kid made me realize how strong my feelings are for him."

"We're not breaking up."

"Tanaka-san, I want to know my feeling for now. I am so sorry." Shingyouji left him walking away from him.

After almost a week Leo decides to just return back to New York but he told Shingyouji that he will not yet give up he'll accept Shingyouji's request of space for now and will return to him once he settled his feelings.

Shingyouji walks outside the school hall depressed feeling guilty of hurting Leo, suddenly he saw Misu, and the older man approached him to talk to him.

"You have avoided me these past few days especially during the funeral."

"He already what happened about us."

"Is he mad about us?" Misu asks him.

"He was sad; he could have just shouted and cursed me."

"So it means we can be together again like for real now?" Misu leans at Shingyouji to kiss him but he was stopped by the young man.

"No, what we did what I did to Tanaka-san was wrong I lied, I cheated and it makes me feel awful." Shingyouji started to cry. "And I love you I still do but being with you just reminds me of that and I'm not that person I thought I was."

"We'll never do that to each other."

"I thought that I'll never do that to him we have to face the truth when it comes to love I don't know who I am, until I found out I can't be with anyone I can't be with you."

Misu broken hearted walks away he share one last look at the young man with tears now coming down his face. Shingyouji breakdowns and cry just standing alone seeing Misu gone from his sight.


There was a review that had love the LEO/SHIN love team now this will be SHINDEPENDECE (being alone wittouth someone right now^^) well I hope you enjoy reading and I am currently watching GLEE because that is what I am suppose to do but I kind of enjoy writing story while I am not yet that busy.