Finished this chapter in a few hours too. It's the longest chapter by far with 4,920 words minus the author note wow!

To be honest, I feel like drawing some ChibaHaya fanarts again after scrolling through my old ChibaHaya folder and writing this fanfic. Yes, I draw. I have an art account on instagram. Feel free to follow yukifrill on instagram if you want to see my art. I'm so much more active there too /winks

Anyway, despite the length of this chapter, I wasn't able to wrap up the whole thing. So, for the better or the worse, I still have one more chapter on the way.

Enjoy your read!

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN ANSATSU KYOUSHITSU


Chapter 7: Culmination

Hayami clasped her hands desperately. She didn't believe in God, but she wanted to pray to whatever being that could grant her wish that Chiba would be alright.

The smell of hospital usually made her feel calm but now she wanted to throw up.

Ritsu had been trying to calm her down for the past thirty minutes since they arrived to the hospital. It had been fifty minutes since they found Chiba lying unconscious on his bed with a bottle of sleeping pills in his hand; the rest of the pills scattering on the floor. She remembered the horror in her eyes when she approached him and slapped his cheeks to wake him up. She remember how relief washed over her when he mumbled incoherent sentences and she brought him to the restroom, trying to ignore how limp his body felt, to help him spit out the pills that were still stuck in his throat. She didn't know how many of them he managed to swallow but she was glad to see quite a few of them flushed down the toilet.

She was going to call his family when he limply put a hand on hers and weakly shook his head. She dialed 911 instead.

"Why would he do that?" she found herself mumble.

"Life hasn't been very kind with Chiba-san for the past few months," Ritsu took the initiative to explain, "Out of everyone in E Class, I keep in touch with Chiba-san the most because he keeps seeking for me. He has been very lonely," she said sadly.

Hayami opened her mouth to say something but stopped. She really couldn't judge him. She knew his family situation and his severe inferiority complex.

"I was very happy when the two of you finally started going out. It was when Chiba-san actually felt happy, although it didn't last very long. Don't feel discouraged, Hayami-san. Like Chiba-san told you, none of this is your fault. If anything, you've softened the blow for him," Ritsu reassured and smiled.

"No," Hayami said.

"Sorry?"

"No." She shook her head weakly. "You don't have to lie to me. I know it's all because of me. I should've pressed him to tell me instead of letting him give in to his inner demon. I made him worse. If we never started dating, he wouldn't have thought about using me to his advantage and feel bad about himself afterwards. I know him well enough to tell that his guilt towards me is worsening him. If we never started dating, none of this would happen and I wouldn't be the one who sent him away when he needed me the most." Her lips quivered and she inhaled as she remembered the moment she told Chiba she didn't want to see him anymore. "If only I could redo everything," she choked.

Ritsu looked at her ex-classmate with pain in her face as she held her hands near her chest.

"Chiba-san said the same thing."

"What thing?"

"About wanting to redo everything. He believes that there's something wrong with him, fundamentally. So he told me to erase some memories for him—"

"Wait," Hayami's eyes widened. "Erase some memories? You could do that?" she asked and then she was reminded about that day after the movie when Ritsu told them the very same thing and it answered her own question.

"Well, yes." She sounded sheepish. "He actually told me not to tell anyone, but I think it's best for you to know."

Hayami felt her heart broke for god knows how many times today. She thought she understood him and knew the extent of his pain but turned out she didn't. She couldn't even begin to comprehend the bottomless pit that was his anxiety and sense of inferiority of not ever being good enough that he wanted to erase his memories.

"Ritsu…"

"Yes?"

"You've been with Chiba all this time, haven't you? So you must know a lot about what's going on in his head."

"I suppose so."

"Can you confirm one thing for me?"

"I don't understand where this is going but, yes."

Hayami inhaled deeply. "Did he get worse after we started dating? He did, didn't he? Before that, he thought he could carry all the burden himself. And then I came along and he felt like he could finally share the burden. But at the end of the day, the guilt struck him like never before and he began hating himself more."

Ritsu fell into silence.

"It's right, isn't it?" Hayami asked, demanding an answer.

Ritsu let out a sigh, like she just gave up trying to look for a better way to put it. "Actually… yes. He hadn't been that bad before you started dating. I think his love for you gave birth to an entire level of needing to be better. Also the fact that your love to him is so genuine; he found himself craving for more but hated himself after that. Added with social pressure from around him…" she trailed off.

Hayami nodded, relieved that her assumption was confirmed more than anything.

Not long after that, the doctor came up to her and told her that Chiba's condition had stabilized and that she did a good job letting him spill out the pills or it would've been much worse. After making sure Chiba was alright, Hayami went to the receptionist to pay for the hospital fee using Chiba's credit card. She felt bad for using his credit card without asking but she didn't even bring her own wallet and if he didn't want her to call his family, then this was the only way.

On the way back to Chiba's room, she remembered that she hadn't texted her mom to tell her she wasn't kidnapped or killed for sprinting outside at 1 am.

Then she let Ritsu appear on her phone screen again.

"Ritsu, I need your help on something."

"Yes, Hayami-san?"

.

.

.

Chiba woke up in his room and his eyes traveled around. It was neater than usual.

He looked at his phone but its battery already died. When was the last time he charged it? He was pretty sure it still had a lot of battery the night before. He plugged in the charger and his eyes bolted open when he saw the date. It was two days after the last date he remembered. Whew, where did the memories go?

There was a mountain of messages, especially the E Class group chat. The other messages were full of his classmates and teachers asking where he was and why he skipped classes. Oh my God. How did he sleep in for two days, he wouldn't even know.

He looked at the clock and saw that there was still enough time to make it to school today so he rushed to prepare himself and went to school. On his way, he checked his schedule and saw that he would be free in the afternoon so he decided to ask Hayami if she wanted to go for their usual shooting date.

He raised a brow when he saw the whole chat history with Hayami had been cleared, but didn't mind much because they hadn't really talked that much since high school started anyway.

.

.

.

"It's really too bad that you broke up with your cute boyfriend, though. Did you get into a fight? Is it another girl?"

"Yui-chan!" Yanagi squeaked.

Hayami only gave them a thin smile and shook her head.

"It's just… he'd be better without me, that's all."

"Aw shucks. You two look so good together, you know?" Nishino crossed her arms and huffed. Yui nodded in agreement beside her.

"Really?" Hayami asked, just for formality, as she played with her pigtail and wondered how Chiba was doing. She hoped he felt better and that they never crossed paths again because she would like to think she wasn't the one who snatched his dream from him.

She felt a smile grace her face when she imagined him going to school and doing his best to reach his dream.

She didn't have to be there with him when his dream came true, but she wanted to believe she had contributed in granting it, even though it involved getting out of his life.

Nishino and Yanagi were going to talk about the drama they watched the day before when Hayami received a message from Chiba. It gave her a shock even though she knew he wouldn't remember anything about their relationship.

"Hayami, are you free this afternoon?"

It was the same text message as the first one he sent her when they started high school.

"Rinka-chan, are you crying?" Yanagi asked in grave worry.

"What, is your ex bullying you?" Nishino sounded pissed as she got up from her seat.

Hayami shook her head and wiped her tears with her sleeve before saying, "It's nothing, just an old friend sending a nostalgic message. I must've missed middle school very much." She gave them a reassuring smile.

"Oh, what the hell! You scared us!" Nishino laughed, followed by Yanagi who sighed in relief.

Hayami nodded before replying him.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before but I joined a club. I don't think I'll have that much free time anymore. I heard your curriculum is very hard even for a first year. You should focus on your studies for now. Good luck. Let's meet again when we're older."

Not even one minute after she pressed the send button, a reply came.

"Or during summer. But I get what you mean. My school projects can be very demanding. Thanks for being understanding, Hayami. I agree. Let's meet again when we're both halfway through our dreams. We're going to have many things to talk about, unlike now."

Hayami closed her eyes and smiled. That's right. This was how it's supposed to be.

"Roger that," she replied.

.

.

.

Hayami spent three years in high school distracting herself with school and club and new friends to bury all the trauma from the few months of her first year deep beneath her. The reason why she didn't ask Ritsu to erase her memory too? Well, it's because someone had to carry that burden.

No, that's just sugarcoating. In all honesty, she simply didn't want to forget those memories because they were precious to her. They hurt her, yes. They left scars that wouldn't heal, yes. But still, she wanted to remember the times where she had slowly gotten to know Chiba and his dreams. How they used to have peaceful afternoons together just fantasizing about the future. Or even those silent moments when they were simply together, doing separate things while enjoying each other's company.

In all selfishness, she just wanted at least one of them to remember those wonderful moments happened.

After graduating high school, the E Class held a class reunion at their old school building. She had met Chiba there, but they didn't talk much because she was busy with the girls and he was busy with the guys. She had overheard bits of his conversation with the guys about him graduating with the highest score in his class and was getting a great deal of college recommendations. She was happy for him. And when they got some time alone, she went to congratulate him, to which he replied with a sheepish smile and a thank you.

He had asked her if she wanted to grab some food after the reunion, just the two of them, because they could barely talk when the others were around. But she politely refused him in her newfound sarcasm technique, saying that unlike him, she had some college-hunting to do.

He chuckled in amusement at her sarcasm and told her good luck.

.

.

.

Chiba choked on thin air when he saw the pigtailed maid who delivered the coffee to his table. He wouldn't mistake that ginger hair and green eyes for anyone else.

"Hayami?!" he asked in disbelief, a little louder than he intended to.

"Oh wow, what brings you here?" she asked casually, bringing up the tray beside her head. He really couldn't get his eyes off her cute, long pigtails.

"Wh—I mean—is that really the important question in this situation?" he spluttered.

Hayami narrowed her green eyes and tapped her chin with her finger multiple times, seemingly thinking. "Oh," she pointed her index finger at him, "Are you wondering why I work here?" she asked.

"Duh?" Chiba blurted, opening his palms at her.

"It's close to my university and the pay is nice. I also need firsthand experience at handling different people so this is just the perfect job. Bonus point; the uniform isn't half bad," she ended with a little twirl to make her knee-length skirt flutter.

Chiba gulped at how cute that gesture was but said nothing.

"Wow, you changed a lot. Especially the way you, uh, talk," he pointed out, nodding at himself.

"That's supposed to be the point of my major. I'll take that as a compliment," she said, slightly smirking. Chiba almost fell off his chair at that. "How are things going at your side?" she asked, before looking at the register where her boss glared at her and said, "Uh-oh, not a good time for this. I gotta work first. Catch you later?" She waved the tray lightly.

"Wait, Hayami!"

She turned around to see him looking a bit nervous before he said, "I'll wait here until your shift ends. I just finished a project so I'm relatively free for the week. I want to catch up with you too, uh, so…" he trailed off. "Sound good?"

She looked at him with an unreadable expression and he braced himself for another rejection because it seemed like she kept rejecting him every time he invited her out.

"Sure. My shift ends in an hour, if you're okay with it."

"I don't see any problem with it."

"Cool," she said with a small smile before going to another table to take order. Chiba's heart fluttered but he blamed it on the sleepless nights doing projects.

.

.

.

"Waited long?" she asked when she approached his table again an hour later, with casual clothes and her hair let loose. Her ginger hair now fell to her mid-back with curls at the end. She looked so breathtakingly beautiful for some reason but Chiba didn't want to dwell on it.

"Not at all. I had the time of my life making sure to sip just a little bit of my coffee at a time so it could stay there for an hour." He gestured his hand at the empty cup.

She exploded into giggles that melted his heart. "You learned the sarcasm fast," she said, somewhat proud.

"I did learn from the best," he said playfully and she nudged him lightly in the arm.

"Alright. Shall we get going, then?" she asked, looking at her watch. "I have to go home before it gets dark, though, my friend promised to come to my apartment to do group project together at six."

"Are you living alone?"

"Yeah, because my mom's apartment is kind of far from my university so to save train money, I decided to get an apartment for myself. It's a nice way to start being independent, too. How about you? Are you still living with your family?" Hayami winced at herself that she had to pretend not knowing his family situation.

He shook his head. "I moved out during my senior year in high school." Before Hayami could say anything, Chiba cut her, "Oh, hey, since you have to go home in an hour anyway, let's just hang out here. I'll ask them to get the menu so we can order. My treat." He raised a hand to call for a waiter.

"Oh, what a gentleman," she said playfully, leaning against the table.

"I think I sort of prefer the old Hayami."

Hayami pretended to be disgusted. "Meh, what's so good about her?"

"She's not sarcastic, that's for one."

"I feel betrayed. I thought you liked sarcasm. You even used it just now."

"Oh, did I give the wrong idea?" He was overjoyed at how easy it was to talk to her and even though it was a little different than how they used to talk in middle school, he still enjoyed talking to the girl that was Hayami Rinka.

At that moment, the waiter came and Chiba told him his order before gesturing to Hayami who sat across him.

To get her revenge, Hayami said, "Give me the most expensive main course, the most expensive dessert, and the most expensive coffee in this restaurant," she said with a flick of fingers like she owned the place. Then turned to the waiter, who seemed to be her senior, and whispered as she leaned into him, "Of which the numbers I already memorized, of course. It's MC034, D022 and C013."

The waiter, her senior, chuckled at her sneaky way to show competence at work and shook his head before leaving the table.

"Are you trying to rob me?" Chiba asked, worried for his wallet.

"Don't worry, this place is price-friendly. It won't kill you."

"Let's hope you're telling the truth."

And they spent the whole afternoon talking about their high school and university days; the friends they made in each other's absence, and how much they both missed shooting. Then it proceeded to how well they were doing in the journey to reach their dreams. Chiba admitted that he was doing well with individual projects but group projects always gave him trouble because of his lack of communication skills. Hayami taught him a few tips on how to deal with annoying and manipulative people; and especially people who loved to slip out of group project and let others do the job for them. It made Chiba realize how much the quiet girl he knew had grown from the last time they'd met.

It was almost six when they noticed the time again.

"Oh no, I need to go now." Hayami looked at her watch and shot up immediately, picking up her bag from the chair.

"Sure. I'll pay the bills after you leave."

She nodded and thanked him for the treat. "Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday," she told him over her shoulder when she was ready to leave.

"Huh?" Chiba raised a brow, although he knew she couldn't see it.

"My shift." She gave him a knowing smirk before leaving.

He blushed under his bangs and swore to himself he'd never forget those three days.

.

.

.

Although Hayami didn't want to let herself into his life again, she found herself overjoyed whenever he visited the café during her shift. Of course, he didn't visit her three times a week, but whenever he did, she found herself in good mood all day.

Sometimes he simply came for a cup of coffee while he worked on his projects or papers. Sometimes he'd buy her lunch and asked her to sit with him. Sometimes, very rarely, they'd go for a shooting date after her shift.

Her favorite was when he started talking about his dream and how close he was to granting it.

"My life would be complete if I could live in a house I designed." He said with an earnest smile and she nodded quietly, letting him talk as much as he wanted.

"What's your dream, Hayami?" he asked.

She raised her brows quizzically. Her dream, huh? She wanted to be a journalist, there's that. But to say it was her dream would be a bit weird considering she already started amateur journalism work during her free time. Maybe her dream was to become a professional journalist? Well, to be honest she didn't have to be a journalist. She only wanted a job where she could see different types of people and still earn enough money for a living.

"I really don't know," she found herself answering.

She could almost feel him frown. "But that's sad," he said, sounding a little hurt.

She thought about countering it with sarcasm but scratched the idea. Well actually, if it's about what she wanted to happen the most, she would say that she wanted to see him grant his dream. But then again, he'd definitely get the wrong idea because it would sound too romantic and she didn't want to throw hints at him when she didn't even want to date him. "I'll find it along the way," she said confidently and he lit up like Christmas lights, "I'll tell you when I do."

He nodded happily. "It's a promise."

"Right," she smiled.

.

.

.

Chiba and Hayami hung out from time to time during their college years but Hayami made sure not to get too close to him and tried to keep their relationship platonic. She'd act cold to him if it was necessary so that he wouldn't get dependent on her. She wouldn't mess up again this time.

They attended each other's graduation along with some other E Class friends who could make it. It was nice to have small reunion with their favorite class too.

But a problem arose when they were doing job-hunting.

"They told me to cut my bangs because it's unprofessional. And let's face it, it creeps people out."

"Surely, it can't be that bad."

"I got rejected by ten different companies for the same reason."

Hayami fell into silence for a few moments before saying, "Oh" and sipped her coffee.

Chiba let out a long sigh and slammed his head onto the table, staying like that for a while. Hayami looked at him with a mixed expression of worry and pity. She tried to think of a solution for him and what came into her mind was:

"How about styling your hair?"

His head shot up although his whole body was still slumped. "Like how?" he asked, hopeful.

Her hand reach for his head to tweak his hair, feeling him shudder beneath her touch but she ignored it. "I don't know," she said while tugging his hair behind his ears and stopped breathing when she saw his eyes looking at her in puzzlement. She quickly extracted her hand and said in the calmest voice she could muster, "Something like that?"

She opened her compact mirror and showed it to him to let him see.

"Really?" he said flatly. "I'd rather cut my bangs. I look like a clown, Hayami."

"No, you don't. Not enough make up."

"Hayami!"

She stuck her tongue out and giggled softly.

Hayami went to get some hair gel from a co-worker and worked her magic with Chiba's hair, styling it in every hairstyle she could come up with. She tried Harajuku style, Korean boyband style, metal punk rock style (just because Chiba was a fan of metal songs and he kept giving her hints to try it out), and even an afro. Sometimes she just tried to make funny hairstyle for some laughs.

At the end of the day, they came to a conclusion.

"No offense, but you look like someone else in anything but your current hairstyle."

"Thanks for saying that out loud," he said sheepishly.

The two of them sighed, not knowing how to come up with a solution. If Chiba wanted to be accepted, he had to give up something that made him himself. It was his dream right before his eyes and he knew he needed to make the sacrifice if he wanted to grab it. He didn't know what made him hesitate. It was just a bunch of hair.

"Alright, you know what," Hayami said, standing up and sliding out of the seat before grabbing his arm, "I have an idea. Follow me."

They went to a bookstore nearby. Chiba followed suit as Hayami walked around wordlessly, browsing books in the business section, checking out the covers and summary at the back. The process went on for nearly half an hour as she sometimes returned to see the book she already saw. After contemplating for a while, she decided on a book and shoved into Chiba's chest.

"Drill this into your mind. It's what you need to overcome this crisis. It's not as thick and detailed as Koro-sensei's manuals but it'd work."

"Wha…" he trailed off as he took a closer look at the book. It's a book on how to start up a business.

"Let's get going fast. We want to stop being unemployed as soon as possible, don't we?"

"We?"

"You just focus on sharpening your first blade." She pointed at the book. "You've always been good at observing the world from behind your bangs anyway." He had to keep himself from snorting at how ridiculous it sounded.

"I'll be your second blade," she said with so much confidence that he felt his heart throb.

True to her words, Hayami kept her promise and helped him overcome his weaknesses. They'd hang out together at his apartment, sometimes hers, to discuss the book and plan out the blueprint of their upcoming business. Hayami still held onto her part-time job until she was sure they'd prepared enough to start the business because she still needed to earn money to go by. Chiba also did some freelance designing job to earn money in-between their meetings.

It took eight months for them to finally gather enough support and knowledge to start a business of their own.

Chiba was nervous when they submitted the proposal of their business, especially when they made his name the company name. He felt like he didn't deserve to hog all the glory because without Hayami, where would he be today? But she squeezed his hand and reassured that he deserved everything.

It took a month after submitting the proposal before their business finally started, but within that one month, they had attended seminars related to their field of work and with Hayami's help, they managed to make connections with wealthy people who were interested to invest on new business. Sometimes they were even lucky enough to find seniors who offered to recommend their clients to them after seeing Chiba's work sample, added with Hayami's smooth talk.

They had their first job as soon as their business opened.

As they progressed, Chiba felt the confidence surging in him like never before. Not even when he was offered scholarship did he feel this confident. Not even when a bunch of art colleges practically begged for him did he feel this overjoyed. He was one step before his dream. He felt lucky he had lived to this day.

He felt lucky to have the best partner he could ever ask for.

Sometimes he felt like he robbed her dream from her and it twisted his stomach to think about it, but she never failed to reassure him that this was what she wanted to do.

She deserved so much better, really. She was talented, dedicated, and diligent; added with her looks that left nothing to be desired. She could've easily landed a job anywhere she wanted. But here she was, sticking with good old him.

Everything went really well with her by his side that he felt like he was still trapped in a dream one year after their business started. They did some small jobs like bedrooms, living rooms, sometimes even bathrooms. But they received a big project of building a fancy home two months into their grand opening. They faced a few bumps in the road, but it only made the success felt better.

It all went well, until that very night they finished their biggest project. Their client, Kawasaki-san, was very pleased with the result and he even promised he'd recommend their service to his wealthy friends. What better news would they need?

Chiba wanted to badly to bring Hayami to a French restaurant to celebrate but it was 1 am and the only place open was the bar they frequented. She promised to let him bring her to the French restaurant in the weekend, though.

But then everything plummeted when the old man who owned the bar started questioning their status. It was nothing new, really, he did that all the time. Honestly, it's not only him. A lot of clients assumed that they're married couple running a family business and they only shrugged it off casually. It never bothered them that much because even back in middle school, a lot of people assumed.

But it seemed different that night when Hayami sprinted off after the bar owner asked if they'd never dated before.

And then he found himself standing in front of her apartment door, listening to her sobs without being able to do anything. The strongest woman he knew was just beyond the door, breaking down. And the situation painfully reminded him of something very similar that happened before.

Beautiful and ugly memories started flooding his mind and he was petrified, not knowing how to react to the bombardment. He clutched his head and groaned, trying to make it stop only to no avail. He felt the urge to throw up at the ugly and rotten feelings the memories brought up.

Tears formed on the corner of his eyes.

He felt so ugly and disgusting that he just felt like scratching himself until he bled.

.

How the hell had he been shamelessly living in oblivion after everything he'd done?

TO BE CONTINUED


See that little review box below? I'd be very happy if you drop some of your thoughts in!

See you next time!