College is kicking my ass.

So I turned 20 last Sunday and I don't know how I feel about it yet. No longer a teenager, still not able to legally drink an Appletini. It's a floating year.

I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. I don't hate it, but I'm not totally in love with it either.

One of my darling reviewers requested there be some more Jace and Clary in the story and I thought "I can do that", so I hope I served them justice.

Speaking of reviews, the reviews for the last chapter were amaaaazing! They gave me a major ego boost, you guys. You're all the . I can't tell you how much your reviews light the fire in my creativity, so they are very much appreciated, just as all of you are.

A/N: If I owned The Mortal Instruments, I would stuff Magnus and Alec in my turkey. So be glad I don't. Happy Thanksgiving every one!

Jace's POV

(Announcer Guy: EARLIER THAT DAY)

"Maaaax", I sang in a childish tune." It's time to waaake uuuuup."

I saw a lump squirm under the bed, and then go still. I smirked. So he wanted to play. I crept over silently, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Weell, maybe he's already up." I yawned loudly, stretching my arms for effect. "I sure am tired, though. Maybe I'll wait here for him". Very quickly, I laid down on top of him, making sure not to crush him under all my weight. A squeal of delight pierced the air, and I began my assault of tickling. Max erupted in giggles, fighting his way out of the covers and trying to roll away from my grasp.

"Jaaaaaace! Stop it!" His grin lit up the room, and my heart.

I might be a tough guy. Yeah, I like to start fights for no reason. I've already been in a few scruffs at school, and I have a shit ton of battle scars. But nothing warmed my heart like this kid; my brother. Not even Clary could touch this place in my heart. "Morning, squirt."

"Morning, beast."

I chuckled, tapping him on the nose. "What do you want for breakfast?"

"Cinnamon oatmeal, but you have to make it. I only like the way you make it. Momma puts too much cinnamon in it."

"You've got it, Max. Now get dressed, squirt. We're gonna leave in forty-five minutes."

He saluted me, hopping out of bed and wondering over to his closet. I made my way to the kitchen, setting out the magic ingredients that would create the perfect breakfast treat.

Twenty minutes later breakfast was served and Max was nomming away. "This is so yummy! I thought the apple slices would be icky in it, but you are a genius! You should come home from school and make me all my meals, and I could go to the store with you when you need to go shopping and…and…yeah!"

I laughed, cleaning up our messes. I would leave them but something in me wouldn't let things stay dirty for long. Unless I was with Clary. Things got dirty pretty quick when I was with her.

Today was the day. After I saw Max off I was going to pick her up and take her to the new gala on 16th and then her favorite café. And there I would propose, or promise to propose, or whatever. As long as she said yes it didn't really matter what it was.

"Are you not going to eat, Jace?" Max asked around a mouthful of oatmeal.

"No, Clary and I are going to lunch in an hour or so."

He "oohed" and "ahhed", making kissing noises before he embarrassed himself and stared laughing. I snorted, clucking him under the chin.

In an attempt to escape my tickling rampage, he yelled, "Jace, time to go!" He excitedly jumped up and down as he tried to put his coat on. I smiled, helping him turn his sleeve right side in. He smiled his thanks, slipping his arm in without any problems. We went out the front door, he running to my car as I locked the house.

I slid into my baby on wheels, making sure Max was securely buckled before turning the engine.

"Jace, when you get old can I have your car?"

"What makes you think I'm going to get old?"

He giggled." Everyone gets old, silly! So can I can I can I?"

"Tell you what, when you get old enough to have a car, we'll see if you still want it. If you do, it's all yours."

He gasped; his eyes wide behind his too big glasses. He could be a miniature Harry Potter. All he needed was the scar and green contacts. "Really?"

"Would I lie to my favorite little brother?" I pulled up to the front of his school. A swarm of excited children welcomed us. I saw Max's friend Todd wave frantically to him, jumping up and down and smiling.

I parked, grabbing Max's back pack and handing it to him. "Be careful, have a blast, and I can't wait to hear all about it tonight when I see you."

He hugged me from his seat. "Alec and Magnus are still getting me tonight, right?"

"Yes sir. They'll be here right at seven thirty".

He nodded, hugged me again, told me I was awesome (duh) and ran off to Todd and the rest of his art club.

I stayed until the bus left a good ten minutes later, making sure he was on his way without any problems. When it was out of sight, I revved my engine and spun off, racing down these New York streets I knew like the back of my hand.

Clary had gone home earlier this morning to do whatever it is that girls do to get ready for an afternoon out of the house. Personally, she looked just as hot in a sloppy bun, sweats and one of my shirts as she did in anything else. I'd rather have her naked twenty-four seven, but beggars can't be choosers. Not that I'm begging. Those days are over.

I pulled into her driveway about forty-five minutes later and was greeted with a dazzling smile as she bounded down her porch steps. I got out to meet her, pulling her into my arms. "Good morning."

"Hi", she said, her entire face radiant with her smile. I leaned into kiss her, she meeting me as enthusiastically as I did her. I walked her around to her side of the car, opening her door.

"Are you sure you can't tell me where we're going?" she asked as she slid into her seat.

I leaned in, resting my left arm above the car door. "Oh, I can tell you. But I'm not going to." I flashed a smirk, earning an eye roll in response. Chuckling, I shut her door and ran around to my door.

"Whatever, it's not like I'm bubbling over with curiosity or anything. Which I kind of am."

I pulled out of the drive, heading south. "When have you ever not liked one of my surprises?" I thought for a moment before adding, "Except for that one time. The condom thing was totally Alec's fault."

She laughed, shuddering a bit at her recollection of the incident. "Way to ask your gay brother for sex advice."

"I, my dear, do not need advice on sex. I can pleasure you all by my lonesome."

"Mmmhmm, sure you can." The blush on her face told me everything I wanted to hear even if she didn't say it herself.

We sat in comfortable silence until we reached the part of downtown that was Clary's favorite, what with all the art stores and galleries around. I passed each of them, her face faltering a bit in disappointment. If only she knew what I had in store.

"Have you eaten today?"

She shook her head. "I figured when you said you had "amazingtacular plans" that they included food."

"You figured correct." I found my way into her favorite cafe's parking lot, leaning over and kissing her before I cut the engine. We walked in hand in hand, my thoughts running wild with me throughout the course of lunch.

What if she doesn't say yes?

She'll say yes. You know she loves you.

But what if she isn't ready?

That's why it's a PROMISE ring and not an ENGAGEMENT ring, you idiot.

But what if she doesn't like the ring?

She'll like it because it's from you. And if worse comes to worst and she hates it but says yes anyway, you can always go and exchange it.

But what if-

"Jace, are you okay? They brought the food like, five minutes ago and you've barely touched it."

I snapped out of my worried stupor, fingering the ring box in my pocket. "I'm fine."

"I don't think you are."

"Do I need to take of my shirt and remind you of my glorious abs?"

"Ha ha, very funny. Don't change the subject. If something's wrong, you can tell me. Don't you know that by now?"

I took her hand, kissing the skin above her knuckles. "I know that very well. And it's not that anything is particularly wrong right now…I'm thinking about things that could go wrong."

"Like….?" She inquired, waiting for me to finish. I wanted to wash away her worry. I used the hand that wasn't holding hers to finger the ring box. I took a deep breath. Today was the day, right? It was now or never.

"Clary, I-"

My cell phone went off, startling me, causing me to yank my hand of out Clary's. "Sorry, hold that thought." I dug it out of my other pocket, answering on the third ring. "This is Jace's phone, this is Jace, you know what to do."

"Jace."

My mother's voice stopped my blood cold. "Mom?"

"Jace, Max has-" her voice broke, shaking with sobs. I stood, leaving a fifty on the table, shot a glance at Clary, and bolted. I knew she would follow.

I could hear my father gently coercing the phone away from her. His rumbling voice filled my ear. "Jace, the bus Max was on crashed. It flipped several times, and caught fire. He's unconscious and unresponsive. He's in an ambulance and we're almost to the hospital."

"On my way. I'll call Alec." I hung up after getting the name of the hospital, speeding out of the parking lot and onto the highway. I hadn't even looked to see if Clary had buckled in.

"Jace, what's-"

"Max's bus crashed and he's not responding." I dialed Alec, maneuvering through traffic like fucking Speed Racer. "Damn it Alec, answer!"

"Here, let me try." Clary took the phone from me, calling Alec again.

I had dodged three near car crashed by the time Alec finally answered. I took the phone from Clary. "Alec, what the hell took you so long? I've been trying to get you for fifteen minutes!"

He told me to slow down. I gritted my teeth, grounding out my words. "Max was in a crash. He's unconscious and unresponsive."

Clary rubbed my shoulder, which I was grateful for. "Mom called about twenty minutes ago and told me."

He told me to stay on the doctor's hide until he got there. "And after, bro."

"I sent him the hospital name in a text" Clary interjected. I nodded and hung up as Alec did. Clary's hand came up to my face. It was cool to the touch and I welcomed it gladly. She ran her thumb under my eye. I hadn't realized I'd been crying.

Alec's POV

I raced down the highway, having no patience for dumbass drivers. I needed to get to my brother and fast. Last I knew, he was admitted to Morgan Stanley Children's Hospital and still not breathing on his own. His heart was beating- for now.

I swerved around a jerk in a red mustang convertible, growling through gritted teeth. He honked, and I flipped him off, speeding away.

I was vaguely aware that Magnus was rubbing my shoulder, trying to dispel some of my tension. It wasn't helping, but I couldn't afford to stop him, lest his feelings be hurt in his current mental state. I tried to calm my breathing. I shot him an appreciative smile, trying in vain to hold in my emotions for both our sakes.

"Alec-"

"Magnus, don't take this the wrong way, but I just can't right now. I need silence."

He nodded, leaning his head on my shoulder and hugging my torso. I rubbed his back at a red light, and then took off again like a speeding bullet, as did my heart.

Jace's POV

I stood, pacing the operating wing of the hospital. I couldn't sit in there with my mom looking miserable and Izzy crying. Clary was sitting with her, which I was grateful for. I couldn't let anyone see me this vulnerable. No one except maybe Alec.

Max was being treated now. Of course, we don't know what for because doctors are useless. I could just see them picking the pieces of glass out of his skin. His glasses had snapped in half. Even seeing the blood on his tiny face wasn't the worst part. It was how pale he was.

I slammed my fist into the wall, tears I had forbid to fall ignoring my decree completely. The skin on my knuckles split, inviting a much needed distraction.

"Jace, where are we goooooing?" Max had asked for the hundredth time. I just laughed again, tousling his hair and grinning. He was so annoyed with my intensity to keep our destination a secret he pouted. But then he giggled and started bouncing in his seat.

"Let's just say I think you're going to love it."

He grinned ear to ear, and as I made a left turn our destination came into sight. A little piglet took over Max's body for about thirty seconds as we pulled into the Build A Bear Workshop.

"Woah, buddy, calm down! You're going to make a hole in the seat and fall through it into another dimension."

"Well, I know you'll come save me, so it'll be okay."

I grinned. "Every time, kiddo."

Except this time.

On my fourth or fifth hit, the most rewarding presence overwhelmed me. A delicate voice in my ear whispered "Jace, no" and my anger deflated. Anguish filled its place, and I succumbed to my knees. "He's fucking ten years old. He didn't deserve this."

Clary wrapped me in her small arms; a fortress to protect my shattered spirit. "Oh, Jace. Max has so much of you in him. He's going to pull through. He may be soft spirited, but he'll win this fight." She cradled my head to her chest, just holding me.

We sat there for years it seemed like, people walking around us. This was a hospital- we weren't frowned upon. Good for the twats I would have kicked otherwise.

She stood, offering her hands. "We should get back to everyone else. I know they're worried about you."

"They need to forget me and worry about Max. He's the one who needs them." I took her hands, lifting myself to my feet. It wasn't a second later that I heard something hit the floor. My eyes widened.

She gave the little black box an inquisitive look, bending down to pick it up. A lump rose in my throat. Shit. Shit. Shit.

She turned it over in her fingers, her eyes alight with curiosity. "Jace, is this for Max?"

I swallowed. "No."

She glanced in my direction. "Izzy?"

I shook my head. "It-It wasn't supposed to happen this way. I was going to take you out today, to all your favorite places, and it was going to be perfect. And then Max got hurt…"

"Then…" she trailed off before opening the box herself. The look on her face was that of pure astonishment, bewilderment consuming her. Then she looked right into me.

I nodded again. "I love you."

That was all she needed. She jumped into my arms. I caught her tiny frame easily, kissing her without abandon. She laughed through her tears, and all I could do was smile. I forgot in that moment where I was, who I was supposed to be.

I set her down, taking the ring from her. "Was that a yes, then?"

"Duh!" she grinned, wiping her wet face with the sleeve of her right arm as I slid the ring onto her left ring finger. A perfect fit, like it was always meant to be there. Her slim frame fit into me so perfectly as she hugged me, my own towering over hers.

"Well, this day is becoming an emotional roller coaster. I feel awful that I took this time away from Max. He needs us right now. I swear, I was just coming in here to get you, and we may miss Alec and Magnus coming-"

"Clary, it's fine. There's nothing we can do until Max gets out or the damn doctors come out and tell us something. So what if it didn't happen at the opportune time?" I took her hand in mine, leading her out of the hallway and back to my family. Our family.

Alec's POV

I sat with Maryse and Robert, gripping my mother's hand tightly. We were all staring at nothing, waiting for news, concentrating on not falling apart. I had to be strong for my siblings. I was the oldest. It was my responsibility.

Izzy was in Magnus's lap, sniffling, but her sobbing had subsided when he took over caring for her. I would have to thank him later. Nothing else mattered now except my Max.

Jace and Clary sat across from us, holding hands, her ring glittering off the fluorescent lighting. Any other time, we'd all be out celebrating. And we will be as soon as Max is out of here.

Time passed slowly, or not at all. I couldn't tell. I watched the clock. We'd been here for two hours, the rest of my family even longer. Still no word.

I needed a cigarette. I didn't smoke, but God did I need a cigarette.

"Are you the family of Max Lightwood?" A stout, golden curled doctor came into our tense space, pulling us all out of our thoughts.

"It's about fucking time" Jace growled, Clary rubbing his arm. I felt the same way.

"Calm down ,son", my father's calm, authoritative voice rang. Had it been anyone else, Jace would have gone on a rant.

The doctor overlooked Jace, getting right to the point. "Mister and Misses Lightwood, your son has suffered substantial injuries, including a punctured lung. We did everything we could to save it, but the only option left was to remove his left lung."

A sob rose in my mother and Izzy's throats, but the rest of us remained dawned on me that Max probably wouldn't be able to play soccer.

"It will make things a little more difficult for him, especially if he's a sports player, but it is definitely possible. Only having one lung is going to cut the amount of strenuous activity he can do, and make it harder to breathe when he does get out of breath. His face and left arm have been severely burned, so don't be alarmed when you see him. But he's recovering beautifully. Your son is a fighter."

He's going to be fine. My brother was going to be okay. My brother made it. My brother is a fighter.

I saw Magnus reach his arm through my peripherals, his hand brushing against my cheek. His hand was cool to the touch. I hadn't noticed the tears that spilled over. He stole them away.

I barely heard the doctor describe Max's other injuries. A broken leg, numerous cuts (something about the tip of his ear?), a few bruised and broken ribs. All I could think about was how amazing it was that Max was alive.

Then, if thinking selfishly, Magnus is a beautiful person, and I'm not. My brother lived. His parents died. He was alone. I was surrounded by love and family. Why did he deserve this pain that I had just recently felt? Is that what he lived with every day? Oh my God.

I sat up abruptly and strutted out of the hallway, my traitorous tears falling down. I rounded the corner and slid against the wall into a fetal position, hyperventilating. It didn't take long for him to find me.

"Alec, hey, hey, it's okay. Max is going to be okay. You're going to be okay. Shhh", he cooed to me. His hands were everywhere, petting my hair, stroking my tear stained face. I clung to Magnus and sobbed for him.

"If all that time thinking he was going to die has been what you've felt all this time…I'm so sorry." I barely whispered. "I've been so blind to what you've been going through all these months. I'm so sorry."

He sat beside me, pulling me into his lap and holding me. I buried my face in his shoulder and cried. I cried for Max. I cried for Annie and her father at the loss of her mother. I cried for Magnus. I cried.

"Alec, sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry for. You've been so strong for me, and now it's my turn to be strong for you."

"Bu-But Max is alive. Your p-parents…"

"Are what? Dead? My mom was in so much pain the last few months of her life, and now she'll know no pain ever again. My dad was at a loss in life without her. Sure, he had me, and he loved me more than life, but I couldn't replace her. Now he's with her in eternity. Yes, they're gone, and I miss them every day, and it hurts every day. But I have new strength in you."

I still didn't understand. I sniffled and shook my head.

"It was their time, Alexander. Max has all of his life yet to live. Don't you dare feel guilty about him living and my parents dying." He took my face in his hands, holding me together. "Promise me."

"I can't."

"Yes, you can. Max needs us, he may need you more than anyone. How is he going to feel when you look upon him with guilt ridden eyes? You can't do this to him, Alec. More importantly, you can't do this to yourself."

I nodded. "I'm sorry."

He kissed me, silencing the sobs and slowing the tears. I fisted his shirt in my hands, afraid if I let go I would continue to shatter.

I rested my forehead against his chest, not willing to move just yet.

He rubbed my back. "Draw strength from me, my love. I'm here."

"Alec?"

I heard Isabelle's voice, but I couldn't acknowledge her. I was too broken. "Alec, Max is awake. His meds are going to kick in again soon, and he wants to see you before he goes back to sleep."

Magnus stood, holding out his hands. I didn't take them right away. "Mom and Dad should see him, then."

Isabelle shook her head. "He told the nurse you're the first one he wants to see."

I gave a shaky hand to Magnus, letting him pull me up. I roughly wiped the tears away. I had to do this for Max. He needed me. I looked to Magnus.

"You're alright", he promised firmly. I nodded, following my sister to my brother's room. I took a deep breath, opened the door, and shut it softly behind me.

"Alec?"

My heart ripped into pieces upon hearing my brother's hoarse voice. His body looked even smaller under all those IV's and casts. His glasses were off, the burned half of his face carefully bandaged. I managed to sit in the chair beside his bed. "Hey buddy."

He tried to smile, but I could tell even that hurt. "You don't have to pretend, Max. I know it hurts."

He sighed his thanks. He offered his small, fragile hand, and I took it. We squeezed with all the strength we had. It was enough.

"Is Mommy okay?"

I nodded. "She's worried about her baby. She's happy you're okay. We all are."

"I'm sorry I scared you all."

"Oh, Maxie, it's not your fault! Not at all." I wanted so badly to crush him to me, protecting him from al the hurt of the world. I wish I could take the pain from him.

"Hey, Alec?"

"Yeah?"

"When my face heals, am I gonna get to wear a neato mask like that opera phantom guy?"

I laughed out loud, mostly in relief. Max was his same old self. "Only if you want to. I'm sure Magnus could make a killer mask for you."

"Awsome." He yawned, the tight hold on my hand softening somewhat.

"You can go to sleep, Max. We'll all be right outside."

"Will you stay until I do?"

"Of course."

"Will you tell everyone I love them?"

"You have my word, good sir."

"I love you, Alec."

I rubbed the back of his hand, a lone tear cascading down my cheek. "I love you too, Max. So much. You're going to be okay."

"I know." He smiled weakly. "You know how I know?"

"How?"

"Cuz I'm a badass like my big brothers. Jace is gonna be jealous of my battle scars. "

We laughed, holding each other's hands and rattling off about Spiderman and Batman and who would win in a fight until he fell asleep about ten minutes later. I kissed his forehead, quietly leaving him to rest.

I found my way back to the waiting room, where I found only Magnus. "Where'd everyone go?"

He patted his lap, which I happily sat on. His arms wrapped around me. "They're all off dealing with this in their own way. Your parents insisted on paying for Jace and Clary to go get a celebratory dinner for their engagement or promise or whatever the hell it is. They're going to go to that new Japanese takeout and bring all of us something back here. Izzy went with them. I think your parents are out strolling the court grounds."

I nodded, drained. Manus shifted me in his arms, cradling me to his chest. "Get some sleep, baby blue."

"Max said he loves you", I said nearly incoherent. "But I love you more."

He chuckled. "As I love you both. One as a brother, and the other as a best friend and love of my life."

I kissed him with all the energy I had left. Our hands clasped together over his chest. I fell asleep this way, feeling whole and safe in the sanctuary I found in Magnus and our devotion to one another.

A/N- Ah, Bee is so great. I love her so much, she's like the crazy best friend I never got. BEE I LOVE YOU. Just lettin' ya know :D If you love Bee (and possibly me) review. If you hate both of us… why are you here?
-Ella & Bee, Bee & Ella, those crazy author girls.