Chapter Six:
Roy spoke with Anise about letting Ed and Al stay with her while they were on an assignment. She thankfully didn't ask what it was not that he'd tell her. She knew such things couldn't be told to non military personnel. She agreed stating that the house staff might have to tend to their needs as she would have to leave on a business trip not too long after they arrived.
Lily was in a mood when they saw Ed and Al off. In fact she was near tears and didn't want to let go of either of them. But Roy had to get them on the train and get her home for her lessons and himself to work. Maes also still technically on duty followed him to work. Roy didn't mind, it had been sometime since the two of them had worked side by side but today he was a little worried about his daughter, his thoughts strayed to her often, more so than usual. He hadn't liked how warm she felt or how she'd acted. She was more…quiet and clingy. At first he merely passed it off as her being tired from waking earlier than normal, but now he wasn't so sure.
"Worrying about the boys?" Maes asked from the sofa where he was studying the current case file.
Roy shook his head. "Lily, though I do worry about them as well."
Maes smiled. "Comes with the territory of being a parent, I wonder what Elicia's doing while I'm here."
Roy scratched his head. "Did you see her this morning, Lily I mean? Did something look off about her?"
Maes paused. "I don't think so. She looked a little tired. She really loves Ed and Al." He smiled. "I didn't think she'd let either of them on the train."
Roy nodded. "I know…"
"Edward called you dad before he left, I caught that."
"Yeah," Roy muttered. He still felt like he was stealing the boy from his real father in some ways. He smirked. "Wonder what Haruko will say to that."
Maes shrugged. "He can't say too much, talk in Central is that you're their surrogate father anyway. Everyone knows the lengths you take to insure that they get what they need and try your best to take care of them. Really Roy it's earning you points with people all around. It's not a bad thing."
Roy arched an eyebrow. Well that wasn't exactly…Huh just so typical of people. "I'm not doing it for points or a promotion."
"I know that and they know that. Don't worry about it you've still got some enemies." Maes mused.
"Thanks Maes," Roy smiled.
Hohenheim frowned as Lily shifted for what seemed the hundredth time this morning. She looked tired, pale, more so than normal but she was trying to focus as best as she could on her literature and history lessons. She'd long since run to her room to put on a sweater but it was rather cold this morning as summer was fading fast and the autumn temperatures were setting in at full force. "You miss Edward and Alphonse?" He asked.
Her pretty raven colored eyes met his and she nodded. "Yes, I'm sorry teacher."
He smiled. "That's quite all right, I miss them too."
Lily frowned. "But Edward is so cold to you, I don't understand it. I wanted to be with my Daddy ever since I could remember."
Hohenheim sighed. "Lily I left them because I was sick. Edward feels like I have betrayed him. It is understandable in some ways."
"But I know that he still loves you even if he calls my Daddy Dad."
Hohenheim nodded. Edward denying him hurt more than he could ever say but he didn't blame his son, he couldn't and wouldn't. He was thankful that someone like Mustang had come into his son's lives and helped them, been there for them. And at this point they would need him in the end. Roy Mustang had always been a good and kind young man, complicated in some ways, but Hohenheim had always felt that he could trust the man. He didn't mind Edward calling Roy 'dad', not when Roy had been there to fill the gap he'd left behind. "I know that too."
Lily lifted her tiny hand to her forehead and grimaced. "Teacher I don't feel so well, may I go lay down for awhile?"
He reached across the small table and felt her forehead. Something…the child was burning up. "Lily, can you tell me how you feel?"
She smiled the little smile that lit up the room, the one that always won his sons over, the one that always made Ed smile so fondly at her. "I'm okay, just sleepy and a little cold."
Hohenheim knew she'd been up earlier than usual, knew she'd been out in the rain the day before. Perhaps this was the on set of a cold. "Go lie down and we'll continue lessons from there."
He followed her to the sofa in the study and covered her with the quilt that had been draped over the back. After some time she was asleep and that was alright with him, sometimes the best thing one could do was rest when they were falling ill. He wasn't entirely sure that's what was going on though and decided to watch her for the next few days. With any luck she would be on the mend, this would pass. He was so very wrong.
Two days later Hohenheim was sure the small ball of well behaved energy that was Lily was indeed ill. The light in her eyes had faded some what, she barely spoke and though she tried to fake being well and was doing an excellent job when her father and Major Hughes were around. She was dead tired during lessons. The poor little girl had even fallen asleep while he was teaching her favorite subject, alchemy.
She made no complaints, sneezed a little here and there, blew her nose often, tried to hold back her coughing, but today he could hear her small body wheezing. She was trying so hard and it was a little heart breaking.
The phone rang startling her and he rose to answer. It was Edward wishing to tell Lily they had made it to her aunt's house and he wanted to speak to her. Lily grinned excitedly and slipped from her chair. "Hello big brother," She half whispered. They way she spoke it was almost as if it pained her to try and use her voice.
"Oh I'm fine, how was the trip? Good. I miss you and Al so much. Please hurry. Oh okay love you too, tell Al I love him and miss him too."
Hohenheim smiled as she handed the phone to him. He spoke briefly to his eldest son, a strained conversation where Ed basically gave him a small status report then hung up.
Lily stood blinking a moment then reached for him. "Teacher…I-I don't feel…so…go-" She swayed reaching further for him and thankfully he caught her before her small delicate body met the floor. The way her face felt pressed against his arm…Good god the child was burning up! She was not fine. She let out a soft whimper.
She whispered. "I'm sorry."
He placed her upon the sofa and went to the phone to call Mustang. He had to know where to take her; the hospital or the military infirmary. He couldn't let this slide not anymore. "Teacher I'm so sorry." She barely whimpered.
Hohenheim half way turned to her. The mask she'd been wearing all this time had melted away and his human heart ached to see her look so. It was as if she was finally letting him see the pain and sickness what ever it was she was feeling. "There's nothing to be sorry for Lily. Get some rest." She nodded turning to her side with a shiver and he went on to the phone.
Roy sighed annoyed with the distraction of a ringing phone. He was in the middle of working on the current case with Maes and his subordinates, hoping they could come up with something so Edward and Alphonse could come home. Roy had a bad feeling in his gut, a terrible one that something just wasn't right about any of this. Maes had it too which was a pretty good indication that their instincts were correct.
"This is Mustang," he half snapped.
"I am sorry to bother you Colonel, but where should I take Lily? She is ill, collapsed just moments ago." It was Hohenheim and just hearing the grim tone in his voice, the news he was relaying… It took some real self control to keep himself still and calm. Lily rarely ever fell ill and he'd never seen her so. He'd had his suspicions over the last two days but she acted fine. He suddenly realized she'd been hiding it and with his attention almost completely centered upon the case…
"Infirmary, I'll be there in-"
"I'll call a cab, it will be faster." With that said the man hung up the phone which did nothing but make Roy feel like he'd let his little angel down in not paying close enough attention to her and fear the near worst.
Everyone gave him questioning looks. "What's going on Roy, you've got that 'I'm kicking myself in the ass' look accompanied by slightly scared one, it's not a nice mixture." Maes said.
Roy placed the phone in it's proper place. "Lily collapsed." He breathed. "Hohenheim's brining her in. Maes…"
"Not really Roy. She seemed fine to me, a little pale and warm but she's done a good job at hiding." Maes said softly. There was a hint of worry there that made Roy feel that he wasn't alone.
"Sir?" Riza asked. She looked worried, really worried.
At the point Roy stood everyone stood. "We're going with you, the case will have to wait, it's not like we're getting anywhere with it." Havoc said actually putting out his cigarette for once. He shrugged. "Can't take little sis to the park for a picnic if she's sick so we'll just have to make sure she gets better."
Somehow in some small way that was comforting to the Colonel, knowing that people cared and loved his little angel as much as he. But…Why would she hide being sick from him? Why? He'd do anything for her, move the mountains she believe he could, walk on water, walk through fire, even die for her so why? Was she scared? Was it something Anise had said to her?
He shook his head swallowing a little and made his way to his office door. He had to hurry, he had to be by her side, reassure her that he was here for her, that he loved her. He could almost hear her small voice, the one she rarely used, the meek one calling for him just to hold her. Perhaps that was just some parental instinct for he'd heard it many times when they were apart and often called just to make sure she was all right. Or perhaps it was the guilt for not seeing it all sooner, for not paying close enough attention.
Lily felt as if she were being carried, the vibration of the footsteps were too heavy to be her fathers, Roy didn't walk this hard. The smell was all wrong, not her Daddy's aftershave, no this person smelled familiar unlike anyone she'd ever smelled before and the body felt all wrong. But this person was so very warm and she was terribly cold, her body ached worse than she'd ever felt. She was tired, her throat burned as it'd been burning for the last few days, felt raw and it had hurt to eat. Her face felt like something was pressing against it. Her chest felt as if a cinder block was resting upon her and not moving but strangely enough as much as it was difficult to breathe she still could. But she couldn't open her eyes, they felt too heavy and she was too weak and tired to do so.
"Daddy," She murmured.
"You'll see him soon Lily, I promise. Just a few more moments." The voice was hushed, kind…
"Teacher," her small voice whispered.
"Yes,"
"I want my Daddy."
"I know little one, soon." He promised.
"Lily!" There was her father's voice, that wonderful voice she loved to hear. She felt his hands upon her face then around her. She'd never known soreness like this before. It hurt to be held and touched but she wanted him to hold her and never let go.
"Daddy…I'm sorry." His gentle hand pet her hair soothingly.
"Shhhh baby there's nothing to be sorry for." He whispered in her ear before kissing her head. There was worry in his voice but also a calmness that made her feel so secure. "Just tell us what hurts, how you feel and we'll let you sleep all you want. Can you do that? Poppet look at me,"
Lily tried so hard but her eye lids were so heavy like they were being held down by bricks on strings.
"Open your eyes and look at me sweetie, please?"
Lily fought and fought as hard as she could. It took some doing but finally after a moment or two she could see him but he was so very fuzzy, not clear and it made her cry. "You're not clear Daddy," She thought she could see his frown but she wasn't sure and he began to lie her down. "NO! Daddy don't let go!"
Her father smiled a sad sort of smile she'd never seen before and she shook her head. "Daddy?"
"I'm right here," He nodded to the side. "So are Havoc, Uncle Maes, and Riza."
Lily shivered and followed his gaze. She supposed she should feel happier about them being here and she was happy to see them she was always happy to see them but right now she just wanted her Daddy and…and Ed and Al too.
The door to the room opened and a man in a long white lab coat walked in. He smiled at her and thankfully he brought a blanket. "You must be cold little Miss." He said gently.
Lily nodded and sat still while her father stepped aside and let the man wrap the blanket around her shoulders. The man began to ask questions and she didn't feel like answering. She ached and she was tired, no actually to be more precise this was the worst she'd felt physically in her life.
"Lily you need to answer Doctor Hiasen." Roy said gently.
Lily whimpered but even that small working of her throat hurt. She wet her lips. "I'm cold, my throat hurts, my face hurts, and it feels like someone's sitting on me." She barely whispered. Doctor Hiasen, now that she really looked at him had red hair, short red hair darker than Breda's. He was a tall lanky sort of fellow with a long nose and glasses that rested farther down than they should, probably just reading glasses.
The doctor nodded and smiled sympathetically. "Lily, would you mind if I listened to your chest then took a look at your throat?"
She shook her head. "Hurry, I'm sleepy."
He chuckled and pulled something she'd never seen before from his pocket. She would have asked what it was but at this point she just didn't care. He stuck one end or rather ends in his ears then pressed the round part to her chest. Then he slipped his hand around to her back and removed the strange object from his ear and stuffed it back into his pocket.
"Okay open your mouth and say 'ahh',"
Lily perked an eyebrow. She wasn't going to say 'ahh', her throat hurt which meant it hurt to talk. Doctor Hiasen just seemed to ignore her expression and went to a drawer along the cabinet. He lifted something and came back hiding it from her view. Then he waited. He looked as if he could wait all day, like he'd stand there and not leave until she did as told.
She sighed and he snorted which she found annoying but she opened her mouth anyway. Before she knew it there was something down her throat rubbing it. She yelped and jerked away glaring. He held what looked to be an over sized q-tip on a longer stick with only one head. Quickly he dropped it into a small plastic clear bag and sealed it shut.
"That was very good, thank you." He said and motioned for her to come back. Lily shook her head. "Please,"
"Lily he's not trying to hurt you." Roy said soothingly. He tucked her hair behind her ear then took her hand. "I'm right here poppet."
Lily glared at her father but let the doctor finish his examination. He pressed his cold fingers to her throat and against her cheeks and forehead all of which hurt. Then the man sighed. "I need to get the swab to the lab Colonel, but as it stands she has a sinus infection which can be cleared up with antibiotics."
Her father nodded. "And?"
"She might have strep throat, won't know until the lab results come back."
"How is that possible?" Roy demanded and Lily winced from his tone. She'd never heard him speak thusly to anyone but her aunt and even then she had never been in the room. "She's not been-"
"Several officers and soldiers have come in this week with it, it's contagious. If you been around any who've been infected…I believe Warrant Officer Falman works under you?"
Roy nodded. "Yes he does,"
"He came in just yesterday and he has it. You could have picked up the germs from him or in the mess hall. If she's been there…Uh I should probably look the rest of your staff over as well and put you all on antibiotics. It's cleared up easily. You'll just want to disinfect your house and offices and keep Miss Lily here comfortable and let her rest. And her sore throat might just be from the excess mucus draining down her throat from the sinus infection, her coughing to-"
"She's not been coughing." Roy sighed rubbing his forehead. "Not that I've noticed."
Lily whimpered. She hated it when people talked about her as if she weren't sitting right here and she didn't like the way any of this sounded. "Hurry up, I want to go home!"
The doctor chuckled, not in a condescending way, no he was very polite and that's what aggravated her more. She would have said so but her vision was getting darker, too fast too soon. She wasn't ready to sleep, she didn't want to sleep here she wanted to sleep in her own bed or Ed's or her Daddy's. But try as she might she couldn't fight the coming darkness. It weighed her down in a soft blanket she just gave up trying after a moment.
Roy caught her before she fell off the side of the bed. "Lily!"
Doctor Hiasen was right there checking her over. "Worse than I thought," he muttered.
"What do you mean?!" Roy snapped in panic. He didn't like sinus infections; he knew how they felt for he'd had a few in his life time. And Strep throat…How in the world had she withstood eating fried chicken last night? She'd covered it all up so very well just like her mother had done when she'd been sick. It was frustrating. And now his little girl had fainted for the second time today! What the hell was wrong with her?
"Colonel," Riza's voice said calmly.
Doctor Hiasen shook his head and pulled a thermometer from his pocket. In Roy's opinion the man should have done that first and foremost. Lily's body had trembled in his arms, she'd winced when he'd touched her all signs of a fever, the looking her eyes… Damn it this man was a fucking doctor and that's what they usually did, take temperatures first thing and this was his daughter here!
He watched the man sternly, contemplating getting him fired while the man took Lily's temperature. The man's face paled and he shook his head when he pulled the glass mercury filled stick from his daughter's mouth. "What?" Roy asked. Dread, a dread worse than he'd felt before rose from the pit of his stomach.
"We'll need to keep her here Colonel, I am sorry I've been so scatter brained today what with so many people coming in…that doesn't matter. Lily's got a temp of 103. We have to get it down so she can fight the infection and strep."
103…that number seemed to echo in Roy's mind almost as damning as the final breath his beloved wife had taken seven years ago. His black eyes turned to his baby, his little angel lying unconsciously upon the bed. Immediately he removed his uniform jacket and lay over her. She must be so cold, must have been…Damn it why hadn't he been able to see her suffering, to keep her from this? If Hohenheim hadn't been there today…she…He could really lose her. He couldn't lose her! Not again, not permanently.
He found himself tuning everyone out vaguely aware of Hawkeye taking control of the situation, of Maes resting a hand upon his shoulder while he prayed, no begged a god he barely had faith in make her better, make her well.
Then things began happening too quickly. He was taken from the room as nurses flooded in seemingly abandoning all the other patients in the infirmary. He found himself staring at the sterile white of the waiting room floor for what seemed a lifetime, people coming and going some he knew some he didn't. He couldn't talk to anyone, not even to his friends. He was aware that Hohenheim was still here and finally he lifted his head to check the time upon the wall. It was after dinner.
"You don't have to stay," He muttered to the man.
Hohenheim smiled briefly. "You were there for my children when I wasn't Colonel and Lily's my student. I want to see her get well."
Roy stared at him for a long moment not sure what to say but finally nodded. He didn't know why he was thinking of this now as the thought entered his mind but while they were here…He'd promised Al, sort of promised Lily at the same time. He never said anything to her without following through, never with her.
"Hohenheim, Lily, no all the kids know about," he nodded to the man's arm finally noticing that all his subordinates were here, even Falman who he remembered allowing a note of sick leave to and looked terrible at the moment. "Well that you're sick," he didn't want to say anything that might make the man too uncomfortable and he didn't know why.
Hohenheim nodded grimly. "I know, I didn't mean for Lily to see."
"I don't care about that," Roy began. "I promised Al I would-"
"There isn't anything to be done Colonel, thank you for trying but I've spent years searching and come up with nothing, alchemically, and modern medical science wise."
Roy sighed. "At least have someone take a look, something."
"Chief what's-" Havoc began but Roy shook his head. This wasn't the time or the place to discuss the pouring sands of someone's life nearing the end. He really didn't want too, not with Lily somewhere down the hall so sick.
"She's a good actress," Hohenheim said softly, changing the subject. "I could see that she was cold, tired, her eyes betrayed that much but the rest she hid so well, you've got a strong daughter Colonel. She'll be fine in a few days."
"Excuse me," Riza said softly and rose from her chair beside Maes leaving the waiting room. Roy frowned and followed her with his eyes. He couldn't read her, but then he'd never been able to really read her very well unless she wanted him too.
The waiting room fell silent again. Maes left to call his wife like he did every evening. Havoc went for a smoke break and to get coffee. But Riza didn't return. The doctor came with news that Lily's fever was still at 103 but she was in a privet room and everything that could be done was being done. The visiting hours in the infirmary were over, but that didn't sway any of them from leaving.
Finally Roy rose to find Riza, let her know the updated information not that it was really much of anything. He found her outside Lily's room, standing at the door looking in. His second in command stood so rigidly, hugging her arms. "Riza,"
Riza jumped, startled and that was something Roy never expected to see from her. She was always on top of things, always ready for anything. "I-I'm sorry I was lost in thought." Riza's chocolate eyes met his and there was such fear and sadness in them he wasn't sure what to say or do. "Do you remember…" She sighed.
Roy frowned. "What?"
Riza looked back at Lily. "Sable and I weren't that close, not like…we were friends but not as close as you and Maes. But we were still friends, I'd like to think she was the closest thing to a sister that I ever had."
Roy slipped his hands into his pockets. He could see Sable welcoming Riza as a sister, hell Sable might have proposed it had she lived…He'd never seen Riza like this and wasn't sure what to make of it or how to handle it or rather her.
"I'd follow you to hell and back a hundred times without question Roy." Riza breathed. "I'd do it for Sable and there are times I wish it had been me and not her."
"Don't say things like that Hawkeye," Roy said with an edge to his voice. In truth he couldn't stand to lose Riza, wouldn't have been able to watch her die, or any of his friends. It hurt to hear her say things such as this.
"I can't help it," She met his eyes again. "I can never do the things Sable could and if she'd been here Lily wouldn't have ever…" She took a deep breath. "This world's not fair Roy, it's never been fair. It took a damn fine alchemist from her husband and daughter, someone who could do so much, believed in so much and could…give so much. It left people like me."
What was she getting at?! It was scaring him the way she was talking. "Riza you're just as amazing as Sable was, you're talented in other ways, what's wrong? What are you trying to tell me?"
Riza rubbed her arms and looked back at Lily. "If this world takes her I'll never forgive it. I can't watch her die Roy and I can't watch what it will do to you and the Elric's. I won't be able to pick up the pieces because I won't be able to keep myself together." A tear trickled down her cheek. "Lily's the closet thing to daughter that I'll e-ever kn-know. I can't bear to see her in that bed with the Ivs in her little arms. She's so small, so young…"
It was then that Roy held his subordinate for the first time ever, the first time he'd ever really touched her. He understood something about her now. He understood, though he'd never really thought about it before had simply been so glad that Riza had taken to Lily, why she'd connected with his daughter and helped him to fight for her. Riza truly loved Lily as her own, the child she'd never have of her own. She was telling him she couldn't bear children…A terrible thing, he wondered what it was that prevented her from…it didn't matter it didn't change her worth like she seemed to think it did.
"Lily will get better, she's a Mustang, remember that." He whispered and prayed it was true. She'd not give up, she'd beat the illnesses and the fever would break. He'd not lose her after so long without her.
Riza pulled away to look into his eyes, hers were stained with tears he'd never seen the woman cry before and red. "Is it too audacious of me to think of her as mine? I know I haven't raised her and we're not-"
Roy silenced her with a kiss and he didn't care who saw or what they might think and say. He loved Riza just as much as he'd loved Sable and as much as he loved Lily. She was tense for a moment then relaxed in his arms but she was crying harder now. It had to be… Then she broke away. "I've always loved you even when you weren't mine and I feel so terrible saying so because she was my friend."
Roy searched her eyes, shaking his head. "Don't Riza; we can't change anything. I had to learn the hard way…Still learning. But we've got now." He chanced a smile still feeling so thrown by her behavior. "Besides you're as much Lily's mother as Sable, she said so herself the day she called you 'mom'." He sighed. "And she wants us to be together as much as I do."
Riza closed her eyes. "That's one way of asking me Colonel,"
"I fear getting shot going about it directly." He mused.
Riza opened her eyes. "How is she, I saw the doctor go in but he didn't tell me anything and the subject of us can wait." Back to business at hand, that was Riza, always on top of things, keeping the important things at the center of his attention, but she was important too.
"Not any better. I want to sit with her. I don't want her to wake alone in this place. Come with me?" He asked.
Riza hesitated but nodded. "If that's-"
"Don't you ever ask me that again." He ordered and it was an order, a serious one not to be taken lightly. "She'll want you too and you've never been unwelcome with us." He took her hand and led her inside.
Lily felt so heavy, like she was swimming in a pool with bricks tied with ropes to her arms and legs and her heaviest clothes on. Make that a very cold pool. Maybe there was ice on the surface but she could breathe so unless she'd grown gills she wasn't submerged in water. Somewhere near by there were voices, softly speaking. She felt like she should know those voices but she didn't know for sure and they were too far away to reach. She felt so terribly cold and alone, her body still ached so. Daddy…Daddy. Please Daddy I'm cold.
Couldn't he hear her, she was calling to him. Why wasn't he coming? That thought was lost as that damnable darkness crept upon her once again. She was really beginning to hate the dark.
She didn't know how many times or how long she came and went like that, it felt like years and she couldn't really make too much sense of any of it. At one point she though she could feel someone touching her and it hurt as much as it was comforting. Another time she thought she could hear Edward but Edward was on assignment. Then again she thought she could hear Al. And always she could hear people around her talking, hear sounds that never sounded like home. And always so very cold.
Even to her seven year old mind she deducted that something was terribly wrong with her. She shouldn't feel this horrible, shouldn't wake up but not be able to open her eyes but she couldn't remember why she was like this. It seemed like just as soon as she got anywhere in thought she was lost in a sea of darkness where nothing reached her… almost like…she was suspended in time or her mind in the very least.
Sometimes she dreamed but they weren't nice dreams. They were nightmares, the kind she supposed were just as bad as some of the ones she wasn't able to wake her father from and had to get Ed to help her wake him from. In these dreams she was always freezing and all alone in a dark room, her voice pleading with someone to come and get her because she could never find a way out on her own and she did try. A few times she saw the ones she loved stop by for a visit, looking through a suddenly appearing window but they never helped just stared at her then walked away. At one point she could hear her aunt laughing at her telling her 'I told you so,".
Roy woke two days later to a sound he wished to god he had never heard in his life. It peeled the very layers of his heart away leaving him to bleed internally for hours afterward. It was Lily crying and begging in her feverish delirium, her little mind seeing something terrible enough to make her cry and beg, and weep helplessly. She was so scared and there wasn't a damned thing he could do for her.
Good god it had been two whole days and the fucking fever hadn't broken. He'd demanded, threatened, pushed to the point that Maes and Havoc both had had to restrain him from punching the damned doctor, beating him to fix his baby. But there was nothing anyone could do but wait and it was killing him to see her like this. It was like she was just getting worse despite the nurses telling him there was no change and that was better than getting worse. But how was it better when she was like this?! HOW?!
He rose from his chair and rested his hand upon her forehead to brush her sweat coated bangs from her small contorted face. "Daddy don't do please. I'll be good! I promise! Ed, Al stay! I don't want to be here please I'll be good!" She cried so very weakly, her voice horse from the yelling of yesterday. Yesterday…He didn't know what was worse, hearing her yell those words over and over begging the various people in her life to stay with her, or this weakened hoarseness.
"Poppet, I'm here, I'm leaving you." He soothed near her ear. Then he kissed her sweaty temple. "It's okay baby, shh…" Even though she begged as if she couldn't hear him when he spoke to her she calmed down enough to stop crying. Well maybe something was getting through to her, just enough.
After a few minutes of this, him speaking softly to her, she quieted and was still again. And there was a soft knock upon the door. It opened and Havoc poked his head in. "Hey Chief, any better today?"
Roy rubbed his face, feeling the stubble upon his chin. He'd not been home, didn't dare leave her though his friends had asked him too, but he couldn't leave Lily. "No,"
Havoc sighed and opened the door. There was a small bag in his hand and Fury right behind him. "Well in that case," He came to him and offered the bag. "I spoke with the nurse and got you permission to use the shower down stairs, ya got the whole bathroom to yourself. Here's a change in clothing too, tooth brush. Maes let me in and Edward called. I didn't tell him anything, just that you weren't home, didn't know if you wanted him to know."
Roy looked at the bag and took it, dropping it without a care to the floor beside him. "No, Ed needs to focus, I'll tell him later."
"Colonel go take a break please." Fury said softly. "We'll look after her and let you know anything right away. Besides today we promised her a picnic." Fury smiled a little smile obviously trying to lighten the mood.
Roy sighed and gave in. He did need to stand and stretch for a bit, just long enough to take a shower. Slowly bent down to pick up the bag, the very act annoying his sore back muscles and then he bent over to kiss his daughter again. "If she starts crying…talk to her. It seems to calm her down, she doesn't wake up." He couldn't say anymore, he was too tired.
"We will," Havoc replied and as he left his two subordinates, two friends pulled up chairs and sat around the bed. Some date they were getting with Lily, she wasn't even awake to play and talk. Even if it was just for play he dearly wished she could be awake to enjoy all the attention.
Light, bright light filled her line of sight. Lily blinked opening her eyes. She could open her eye! She could see…Oh no no no no she didn't like this room any better than the one in her dreams. This one contrasted the other, the black room terribly. This one was white, too white and wasn't Heaven supposed to be a white place as far as the eye could see like snow blanketing everything? No she didn't want to die! Wait if she was dead then why did she still feel so cool? Why did her body ache and feel heavy?
As her eyes adjusted she began to make out another bed across the room, a curtain, equipment she'd never seen and if she'd not seen her father and Riza sitting together in uncomfortable positions leaning against each other, both appearing asleep she'd think she was in some torture chamber. She'd never been in a place like this, not that she could remember. Was this some sort of hospital? Wait…
Her black eyes darted back to her Daddy and Riza. They were sitting, sleeping together, her daddy's arm around Riza. It made her smile. It was one of the most beautiful living pictures she'd ever seen, but they looked a little worn. That wasn't a good thing but they way they sat was even better, it gave her hope in some strange sort of way. But there was something else in the room, something that made her senses perk up, someone was watching her and it was kind of scary.
She began to turn her head, looking frantically, hoping against hope that it was just her older brothers. It wasn't it was someone familiar, someone she knew but didn't know, at least not in the flesh and she was so lovely. This person was dressed in a light blue dress and there was something upon her back, something snowy in color with hints of silver, something feathery that she couldn't quite see all of. Long scarlet locks of hair framed an angelic face so light in pigment, kind blue eyes the color of the sky or the sea, not that Lily had ever seen the sea first hand just in pictures, and she smiled a smile she knew by heart. "Mommy?"
The woman's smile brightened and she sat upon the bed beside her. She had to be real, the bed dipped and the warm hand that reached and caressed her cheek felt so…so very gentle. "Good morning honey,"
Lily's eyes widened. "Mommy is it really you?"
The woman chuckled softly, nodding as she smiled again. "Yes honey, I'm here."
Lily frowned. "Then am I dead,"
"No, you're very much alive, not in perfect condition I might add, but alive."
"Oh," Lily shook her head but…she didn't get it. "If I'm not dead and you're here then does that mean you're here to take me away to heaven?"
Sable shook her head. "No, you're not going to leave your father anytime soon. What's the matter can't I come visit my baby girl?"
Since this was the first time Lily had ever spoken with her mother, and it might be the last, she wasn't sure how these things worked or even what it was, she felt…horrible. "I-I'm sorry Mommy I-,"
Sable leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "There'll be none of that now love. Don't cry, I really hate it when you cry. Besides you don't want to wake your father and Riza, they just fell asleep not half an hour ago."
Lily lifted her arms, was amazed that she even could after feeling so weighed down for so long. She could smell her! Her mother smelled like jasmine. She could even feel her. Not one to waste a moment that may never come again, Lily touched her mother's hair. It was so soft like flower petals or her Daddy's dress shirts after fabric softener fresh out of the laundry before he starched and ironed them. And her voice was soft and sweet but her imagination didn't hold a candle to what she was hearing.
Her mother wiped the tears away. "Please don't cry Lily,"
Lily shook her head. "You're so pretty Mommy,"
"Mm your Daddy thought so too. It didn't take much to win him over. Did he ever tell you how we met?"
Lily shook her head and touched her mother's face memorizing its feel. Her mother shifted as if to gain more comfort. "I saw him the day I went to take my alchemy exam. He was talking to Uncle Maes and happened to see me. I thought he was so handsome dressed in his uniform. I was waiting outside HQ glancing at my watch and he came over to say hello and just to talk, flirt." Her mother cocked her head to the side with a grin. "He's very good at flirting."
Lily smiled. "He's really good at lots of things Mommy."
"You're right, he is. But that's how we met you could say it was love at first sight for me at least."
Lily smiled. "Like in the story books Daddy reads me with the princesses and the princes, the fairy tales?"
"Mmm hmm, just like that. Your father always made me feel like a princess."
"Me too, I have brothers now, Ed and Al. I wish you could meet them they said you were pretty too."
Her mother smiled. "Well I feel like I could win some sort of contest with all the complements I'm getting…" Her mother became serious. "You need to get better Lily. If you've got brothers you need to help your Daddy take care of them. And you've got your Daddy and Riza to take care of too, and all of Daddy's friends. It's a big job but you can do it."
Lily didn't know about that, if she could take care of so many, she couldn't even take care of herself all that well yet. And she was so tired… So tired of fighting and this was the only break she felt like she'd had for days. "Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Did it hurt?"
Her mother's faded. "What?"
"When you died?"
Sable sighed. "Yes, but your Daddy was there and I could see you in my mind. You've grown so much and you look just like your Daddy. I told him you would. But you're not going to die."
Lily got to her knees and crawled into her mother's lap. Instantly her mother's warm arms wrapped around her, holding her close, and she rested her head upon her mother's shoulder, sneaking a peak at her back. She had wings meaning her mother was an angel now. But it was depressing as it was exciting. "Then you're not with us all the time and I lied to Daddy." She sighed. "He won't be happy about that."
"You didn't lie baby, I am with you even if I'm not right by your side. I am always peaking in on you from time to time, even on your Daddy. You don't see me or hear me, but I come every now and again. I have a job in heaven to do that's pretty important, can't give you the details and I wish I could."
"Are you an alchemist like you were here?"
"Of a sort," she replied.
"Mommy?"
"Yes love?"
"I'm really dreaming aren't I?"
"Well yes and no. You're catching on pretty quick, I'm very proud of you. I'm," she paused and pushed Lily away just a little and touched her heart. "It's like you told Roy, I am right here."
Lily began to cry. "Then everything you're telling me isn't real and when I wake up you'll be gone. I don't want you to go Mommy."
"Oh baby I know," Her mother pulled her against her once again, petting her hair and rocking gently. "Let's see if that smart little head of yours remembers this." And her mother began to hum a soft little tune, not quite a lullaby, but close. Lily listened feeling herself grow sleepy, something she fought with a vengeance. She didn't want to get tired and fall asleep when she was already asleep, which didn't make much sense, but she didn't want too.
As her eyes began to close she remembered the tune, remembered the voice. She remembered it! She really remembered it. Her mother's voice paused in the tune to speak. "I used to sing that too you, remember it Lily." Then she began to hum again.
Roy jerked awake. He felt like someone had brushed his face with their hand. He looked down at Riza, her head rested upon his shoulder and he could tell by the way she breathed and muttered that she was asleep. He looked for Lily. She was asleep too, still. His heart fell. He wished she'd wake up, speak to him, smile.
He frowned smelling something he'd not smelled in so long…Jasmine. Sable? He looked around. No she was dead…but why? Probably one of the nurses, it had to be. The dead didn't come back to life unless an alchemist was dumb enough to risk it and even then he doubted Sable would smell the same. But it was odd, the way it lingered in the air around him, as if she was standing beside him.
He sighed and shifted in his chair, damn these things were uncomfortable and hard. One would think hospitals and infirmaries would have better seating. He shook his head and closed his eyes, feeling the drain of the last few days, the very thing that had led him to nod off in the first place.
Lily opened her eyes hearing voices, they were loud, too loud and she tried to lift her hands to cover her ears but she was weighed down again. "Shuddup." She mumbled.
There was a pause then chuckling from what sounded like three people. "Someone's a little cranky,"
She felt a hand upon her face and opened her eyes. She met her father's relieved smile. "Hey," he smirked then. "Sleeping beauty didn't need a prince to wake her after all. And here I thought I was going to have put out an add in the paper just for that. How do you feel," his hand cupped her cheek. "You feel cooler."
Lily turned her face into his hand. "A little cold, not…as bad as I did." Her voice sounded strange to her and she frowned. "Where am I?"
Maes's face came into view. "The infirmary, you've been unconscious for the last five days."
"Thanks Maes," Roy muttered.
Maes shrugged. "Edward's been asking for you when he calls, he really wants to talk to you so you'd better get to feeling well enough to talk on the phone."
"Are you mad at me?" She asked wincing a little, it certainly sounded like it. She looked to her father in askance.
Roy sighed. "Now's not the time for this poppet."
"Yes it is!" She cried giving him her 'I will not be swayed,' look.
"We're upset that you didn't tell us you were sick yes, but that you were sick, no. people get sick baby. Is that why you didn't say anything, so you would worry us?"
Lily nodded.
"If you do this again you're grounded for life." Roy stated very clearly. "And I don't care how old you get." He was quiet a moment then smiled. "You feel up to some visitors?"
Lily shook her head. "No," she felt tired and after five days of sleeping she didn't understand how that was possible. "I'm so sorry, maybe in a little while."
"I'll let them know," Maes said with a smile and headed for the door. He turned and grinned. "Great to have you back, can't leave little Elicia without a cousin to play with so you hurry and get even better okay?"
Lily nodded but didn't smile. Elicia would be able to play for at least another year, he was being unreasonable at the moment, but then again if she really thought about it…She was too tired to think and gave up on it.
When they were alone she tried to reach for her father. "I saw her Daddy,"
"Who?" He asked sitting upon her bed, in the same place her mother had.
"Mommy, she said I wasn't dying and I wasn't going too for a long time, but I saw her. She was really pretty."
Roy frowned a moment then smiled.
Lily perked an eyebrow. "You don't believe me do you? Well she was here, she smells like jasmine and told me that you two met the day she took her alchemy exam. No one ever told me that, I might have been dreaming it Daddy but she was here, I felt her!"
Roy blinked a moment then shifted and shifted again. Then he sighed. "I believe you-" The door opened and the doctor, doctor Hiasen entered with a clip board. Lily scowled not too thrilled to see him. The man smiled.
"Sorry to interrupt. May I check you over?"
"No," Lily replied shortly. Oh she remembered him very well and his cheery disposition only irritated her. She was having an important conversation with her father and didn't want to be interrupted.
The man snorted. "Colonel,"
"Ye-"
"Don't ask him!" Lily barked. "He's not me and I say no, you're-"
"Lily let the doctor look you over please." Her father said with surprise and probably to keep her from offending the doctor. He looked so tired suddenly and she gave in muttering to herself.
"My aren't we cranky today. Don't see why it's a lovely day, the trees are turning their color. Soon you'll be out playing in the leaves, doesn't that sound like fun."
"Are you going to be hovering over me with strange objects?" she bit.
"Lily!" Roy breathed.
"It's alright," Dr. Hiasen chuckled. "Still not feeling one hundred percent are we?"
Lily shook her head. "No," she whimpered.
"Well we'll get you better and I hear that there's some jello on the menu toady. That should fell nice on your throat. Does it still hurt?"
Lily nodded. "A little…"
By the time the man was finished poking and prodding and asking questions Lily was exhausted. Her father sat by her side even after he left talking to her, letting her know that Edward and Alphonse were alright and seemed to be doing okay, told her she'd slept through her date but Fury and Havoc had come. She fell asleep to the sound of his voice like so many times before.
