.


7. After


She fell to her knees, crushing a few flowers. For once she didn't care. She would later, but for now she was totally consumed by the sucking, clawing feeling in her chest. It felt like a small black hole had set up shop in her ribcage and was dragging her heart through it. Somewhere distant and airless, pieces were jettisoned like so much waste and dead meat.

Zack was gone.

She knew it like she knew her own name. He had been alive, his presence brushing the edge of her senses, slightly more solid than a memory. It had been that way for so long. She had taken comfort from each tickle and looked forward to seeing him for real. She knew he was on his way.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, he was hurting more than he had in months. Then he was gone. She had no warning, no inkling that she was about to lose him for real. She searched frantically for any trace, but there was nothing. He was dead.

"No," she whispered, as if that would make any difference. "Please, no."

She stayed where she was for what seemed like hours. Her lower legs went numb. Her knees started to seize up. The broken floorboards at the edge of her flowerbed left indentations in her skin. Her rounded back ached. She didn't care about any of it. Nothing compared with the pain in her chest.

So this was what a broken heart felt like.