Drabble 7: Burt
Author's notes: You guys have no idea how much fun it is to write for this fandom. There's so much love and hate at the same time, it's so crazy!
Thanks to clovrboy for requesting. This was actually my next installment and you practically read my mind there!
Burt Hummel grew up as a man who was comfortable with routine. He was raised in the traditional American fashion, where his dad worked late into the night and his mom always had dinner ready at the table by 6:30. 'Moderation in all things,' his father was fond of saying.
So when he married Elizabeth and had Kurt, he was set to bring up his son in pretty much the same way, except that Kurt was probably the opposite of everything that he had ever lived by.
They say that a mother always knows, but Burt knows that fathers have their fair share of intuition, even if they do try to ignore what's fairly obvious just because it wasn't the usual way of things. He knew that Kurt wasn't like all the other kids, and he was fine with that. Why he chose to ignore it for so many years he really couldn't figure it out. He just did.
The first time he knew was when he brought a 4-year old Kurt to the toy store. Burt remembered smiling while Kurt ran through the store, giggling at the prospect of getting a new toy. His dad followed a couple of steps behind, waiting to see what toy the boy would choose.
He could perfectly remember the mix of dread and bewilderment as his son passed by the cars and the G.I. Joes and finally stopped at the Barbie aisle. He had offered a bawling Kurt a set of Joes with their own tank but the boy wouldn't stop crying and so he just bought the Barbie for him, and even threw in a hot pink automobile just because he hated to see his son cry.
Then the flurry of tea parties and Broadway show tunes started. And Burt knew it was only a matter of time. So when Kurt had finally told him he was gay, Burt had already accepted him. There was no one more important in Burt's life than his son, and he knew that he was fiercely protective of him. He couldn't help it, Lima wasn't exactly the most accepting place to raise a gay son… but they manage.
And then Kurt began liking other teenage boys, and Burt had started collecting guns again.
Burt had a feeling that Kurt liked Finn a lot back then, and was aware that the set-up with Carole was really a ruse to get closer to the tall teen but Burt wasn't really surprised when it didn't work out. He was there to pick up the pieces but he couldn't do anything about it. He loved Kurt but Finn was undoubtedly as straight as an arrow and timber yard combined.
Then there was Blaine, who was a nice kid, really. But Burt, with his 'father-sense' (yeah, he made that up, quite well, of he did say so himself) knew that what Kurt felt for the Dalton kid was a sense of hero worship. Blaine was a good friend for Kurt, just because they were going through the same thing, and Burt was glad his son finally had someone to talk to about those things.
And then there was Sam. Out of all the boys, this kid had Burt guessing his moves, even questioning his 'father-sense.'
He didn't even know what the kid looked like; just that he had 'lemon juice' hair, as Kurt had told him. So when a beat-up truck pulled up in front of the car shop Burt was expecting to gear up the engine, or at least a paint job, judging from the nasty scratch marks at the hood, but he wasn't expecting for the blond driver to walk up to him while he was having his afternoon ham sandwich, with Kurt's best friend, Mercedes, behind him and say:
"Good afternoon, Mr. Hummel. I'm Sam Evans and I would like to take your son out for a date."
It was a good thing that Mercedes was there to step in front of Sam when the shotgun under the desk was brought out, because Burt really didn't want to shoot anyone that his son cared about.
"Mr. Hummel! Stop and wait for Sam to explain himself!" Mercedes cried out as Burt took the safety out of the gun handle. Burt ignored her and proceeded to aim the muzzle at Sam's head.
"You have 2 minutes to tell my why I shouldn't shoot you." The click signaled the bullet entering the barrel. Burt smirked in satisfaction as he saw the blond kid swallow in apprehension.
"Mr. Hummel!" Mercedes looked ready to faint, or at least smack the gun away from him.
The kid looked warily at the gun's muzzle 6 inches away from his head and stepped out from behind Mercedes. "Can you wait in the car, Mercedes?"
She looked at Sam as if he'd sprouted another head. "Are you kidding me, white boy? You might get killed!"
"I'll be okay. I need to talk to Mr. Hummel. Alone." Mercedes looked from Sam to Burt and finally gave an exasperated sigh.
"Fine," then she went to the car, which left both men facing each other, one scared out of his wits but determined, the other furious and downright scary.
Burt pointed to the wooden chair in front of his desk. "Sit." He ordered, and the blond kid scrambled to sit down. Dropping down onto his own leather chair on the other side of the desk, he placed the shotgun on top of the table between them, his right hand resting on the handle.
"Now, explain yourself."
Sam seemed paralyzed for a minute but with a deep breath he stood up straight in his chair. "I-I w-want to date your son, Mr. Hummel, I know you don't have the slightest thing about me but I mu-"
"Weren't you the guy who was supposed to sing with Kurt?" Burt cut in.
If possible, the boy turned even paler. Burt was inspired by such fear that he lifted a wicked-looking knife from his drawer and almost laughed at the stricken look on the blond's face.
"Y-yes, I wa-I am, sir."
"What happened? You didn't want to be seen singing with my son?"
"N-N-No! It wasn't like that, Mr. Hummel! Finn talked to me about backing out but I didn't! It was Kurt who broke it off… I wanted to sing with him. His voice is amazing! I-I…" Sam trailed off as the other man held up a hand to shut him up.
Burt crossed his arms across his chest and leveled a hard look at the boy. "Why did you have to come to me? If you liked my son, you could've just asked him out."
"I know that you're protective of Kurt… you should be with someone so special…" Sam was fidgeting with a corner of his jacket as he answered, but it was to his credit that he met the other man's eyes with a determined look of his own. "I just want you to know that I really do like your son, that I'm not gonna play around with him."
"You're going to be taunted by people who have pea-sized brains in this town. What're you gonna do about that?"
Sam smiled as he answered, "I don't care. All I want is Kurt."
A few minutes later the boy left with a yapping Mercedes and Burt had to smile despite himself. Picking up his shotgun and the knife, he decided to store it at the back together with the others. He was walking towards the back shed when he stopped and went back to his desk, left the shotgun on top and placed the knife back in its drawer. Whistling a Melon Camp song, he heard the back door of the shop open and Kurt walked in.
"Hey Dad, how was your day?" The boy picked up his left over plate and wrinkled his nose at the smell of mayonnaise. He then noticed the gun.
"What happened?"
Burt contemplated telling his son what just happened but thought better of it and just shrugged casually. "Nothing. I was just cleaning it earlier." But a smile was tugging at his lips and the boy noticed.
Standing with one hand on his hip and the other holding the dirty plate, Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?"
"Really. Now go and do your homework… oh, and Kurt?" The boy turned around as he was walking towards the back.
"What is it, Dad?"
"If anyone asks, tell them my gun is always loaded." Kurt looked confused but Burt wouldn't explain further. The boy left after that and Burt was left alone in the car shop. Flopping down onto his leather chair, he placed his feet on top of the desk next to the shotgun and brought out the latest edition of 'Lima Firearms.'
The army-issue sniper rifle looked good. Burt picked up the phone and dialed to order.
The End
Author's notes: Burt Hummel will always be my favorite TV father. Thanks to everyone who has been following the drabbles, you guys make me happy so much! And for all the kummers out there, come join us at tumblr and jump into the canoe.
Keep the kum-ments coming!
