Author's Note: Hey Guys. Sorry for the really long wait; work for school has been hell. Now there is something I must say before starting the chapter: I do not aim to romanticise any of the events mentioned. I wish only to bring them to the attention of others. People need to know that these things happen and that there are people going through this. If anything bothers anyone then feel free to leave a review or PM me. Also message me if you want someone to talk to; quite a lot of the emotions the characters go through is related to myself so I will be able to relate at least partly. Thank you.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything; if I did then there would certainly have been a TWEWY sequel.


Joshua found Neku curled up amongst the roots of a tree a little ways from the café. He clearly did not notice his presence as he kept muttering to himself.

"How is she here? Why is she here? I can never forgive her for what she did; I can't exactly hate her for it though, either. It's my fault. Everything is my fault." Something inside the Cheshire Cat buzzed; he felt a tick form in his eye with every uttered word that dripped from Neku's lips. In the boy/cat's mind, no one had the right to make Neku resort to being a snivelling pile of self-hatred; not even himself.

"You know that stunt you pulled was very rude?" He sat down across from the boy from Shibuya. "Well done; they were about to start nagging both our ears off." Neku still sat hugging his knees to his chest. A combination of anger, hatred and sadness swirled around in Neku's blue eyes; Joshua knew from personal experience what Neku was going through. He also knew that the other wanted to talk; all he had to do was wait and Neku would tell him. And he did…

"Alright no need to keep bugging me I'll tell you!" Joshua wanted to point out that he hadn't said a word but chose not to since Neku was clearly in a hostile mood. Neku moved so that he was sitting on his legs, his hands in his lap; almost as if he were subconsciously begging Joshua. The Cheshire Cat wondered what Neku wanted from him, I won't know until he starts talking I suppose.

"Well, I suppose I had better start at the beginning. My life was perfectly….average. Up until the age of six I was just a plain kid, the same as any other naïve kid." Neku turned so that his left side faced Joshua; his legs outstretched. "My Dad started working late, even staying away for weekends. I still barely know the guy. He used to buy me flashy stuff for no reason when I was little; even as a kid it was clear he was trying to buy my affection. I didn't fall for it – every gift increased the void between my Father and me. Ha ha, my Mum thought he was cheating on her. Turns out he was just obsessed with his job! He had his own life at work; he could be anyone he wanted. He didn't have to worry about his family because he was so fulfilled doing his job." Neku stopped laughing and became serious once again - his face the embodiment of solemnity.

"But then my parents started to argue; not like normal arguments that can be forgiven and forgotten. No, their arguments started to get violent: my Mum….she started to drink, a lot because my Dad was never around. You know those adverts on TV where the husband beats up his wife? Well, it can work the other way too. My Mum started to beat up my Dad when he was at home." Neku shook his head as he stared further into the forest; his eyes distant – caught in the past. "He denied having an affair so she punched him. The injuries he got weren't really serious but they were visable. She loved him so she didn't want to really hurt him. She was angry that's all...soon he just stayed at a hotel. She became paranoid and since my Dad wasn't there someone else was in the line of fire: me."

Neku rested his head back against the tree, his eyes closed. "She began to interrogate me about where I went, who I saw, what I did. I never had friends over because they were scared of her. And to be honest I was too. She drank every night; she became violent when she drank. So I had to barricade my door since it didn't lock. Every night I cried myself to sleep, huddled under my bed; just hoping she didn't come in. I was so scared." His voice began to break so he stopped to prevent himself losing it. "The family had hit rock bottom; in the space of a year my home life had crumbled to pieces."

*******************************Flashback********************************************************************

Neku scrambled out from under his bed; dashing to the window. The sun was just slipping over the top of Shibuya's skyline. Today would be different; today would be a good day; today Neku would make everything okay again.

Neku couldn't wait to get home from school that day. The day was a routine burden that blurred into one long sigh of boredom. He sprinted home; not even stopping at the Cat mural like he did every other day. He ran home; scrambling through the door when he saw his Dad's car out front.

His parents stood in the kitchen, silently drinking tea. There was no cake. There were no gifts. There was no celebration. But there were stacks of boxes littering the halls.

"Son, your Mother and I aren't going to be together anymore. We're divorced."

His eyes began to leak. The essence of his life poured from him. He collapsed on the floor still weeping. This couldn't happen. Not now, not today, not ever. How could they do this to him? Was it his fault they weren't together? If it was then Neku would leave; he would leave and never come back if it meant his parents were happy.

He went straight to bed. He couldn't stand to see the towers of possessions belonging to his father. That day had been different; that day had not been a good day; after that day nothing would ever be okay for Neku.

No one even wished him a happy birthday.

******************************************************************************************************** He turned suddenly and stared straight into Joshua's eyes; his gaze burning. "My parent's divorce was certified on October 26th: my seventh birthday." Joshua sat in stunned silence. No words could be found in that moment. Neku didn't seem to want his input yet though as he took a deep breath and carried on. "I had to stay with my Mum since my Dad worked almost twenty-four hours. He left me to the wrath of my Mum; she terrified me but what petrified me more was the abandonment. I became afraid of people leaving me; of them deserting me. I couldn't take being afraid anymore – I didn't speak to anyone anymore. I became a recluse. My only company was myself; I never was a positive conversationalist. I became so lonely due to my fear that I couldn't take it anymore; I began to self-harm." He pulled one of his yellow wristbands off to display a series of tender pink lines marring the skin. Thankfully none of them seemed recent – just holding onto the memory of being sliced. "This of course meant I was a prime target for bullies. Bones were broken just as easily as my faith in people….that was until that day. I was thirteen years old when things started to change."

****************************************Flashback**********************************************************

Nothing. The ground snatched from beneath my feet. I re-join the earth with a smack! The cold concrete steps bend my spine like a tumbling slinky. Hot, red, throbbing pain sears in my flesh. I slip, one step at a time, in a perfect, cruel and horrific bass line. The accompanying tune comes from the scratching of my backpack on the ground and the tuneless, haunting chortling from the pack of hyenas admiring their handy work, a.k.a the Bloodhounds.

"Look guys a flying dork." Seiji added a "Whee!" for good measure.

"Look Seiji, it dropped its dork porn." My sketchbook: no, not my sketchbook! Please God no.

"My, what do we have here? Oh look a drawing book, OMG. Guys not only does it look and talk shit; it draws it too." Through closed eyes I hear a loud rip! My sketches! My one haven in my crappie life!

"Get up, nerd." Well, no point staying down. How did you throw a punch again….? Not that I need worry. As soon as I was on my feet I was knocked down by a punch to the jaw. I closed my eyes again. The world turned cold. Footsteps got closer to me. They're gonna beat the shit out of me. The footsteps stopped next to my head. Here we go then…

Nothing.

No kicks.

No punches.

Nothing.

"Move out of my way whore. Don't interfere." Whore? I drag my eyes open and see a black pair of Mary Jane's. Who is that? Doesn't matter…. Shut up, yes it does! Who would stand up to Seiji? Let alone on my behalf. True. Don't look at me, I know what you know. I pull myself into a sitting position and stare at Seiji. What? I am not letting him out of my sight. Hey, I don't blame you. The two Bloodhounds with him, Hokku and Yuri posed and chuckled behind him. Wimps, they're probably the biggest dorks. Maybe so but they're not the ones being beaten up, are they? Touché.

"Surprized you managed to drag yourself away from the mirror, Seiji. But then again staring at a cracked mirror would pretty much obscure your abhorrent façade." Ouch. Seiji's face was confusion. He had no idea he had just been dissed. Guy probably can't understand a word over five letters.

Confused he may be but he was getting bored. He clearly wasn't going to have his fun. He stared at his nails. "Fine, you and your boyfriend have fun, Gaylord." And then he turned to me. "Just you wait; you'll get what's coming for you and your little twat whore won't be able to save you. No one will; ciao." The three of them walk off. Well that's over. You're not out of the woods yet mate; that guy's still here.

I am so dead. They're gonna kill me! Goodbye Cat. Goodbye horrible dirty floor. Goodbye life. All thanks to me and my big mouth. I think you'll find it's the opposite actually; it's because you don't talk. Shut up with the snarky comments will you? I hope you're happy!

"Hello, anyone home?" My rescuer stares down at me. Who is he? Now that I can look without fear I take the time to examine him. Full Goth, sheer black shirt with a white fringed edging, long flared black trousers with diamanté skulls dotted here there and everywhere, black panda eyes against a stark white face, and of course the Mary Jane's. He was pretty. Like some kind of Twilight Princess. I was entranced by him.

"You can thank me now dear." Can I trust him? He just saved me from a potentially lethal kicking; I think I can trust him. 'I think' being the integral part of that last sentence.

"Thanks." Man it feels weird talking. I think I haven't spoken in six months; strange how that affects you. The boy in front of me tilted his head; examining me. Well, all we can do is sit and see how this plays out.

"After that we became friends. He dragged me slowly out of my shell again. He showed me that not all people wanted to hurt me. He caught me while I tumbled down the spiral staircase of my depression. He's the reason I met her. She was a different person when he was there; nice and caring. We got along famously; we ended up dating each other. I thought my life was finally taking a good turn. But then the accident happened. He got hit by a speeding car while walking to meet me at the Udagawa Mural. He died."

"The worst part is: I can't even remember his name. Every little mannerism, every small quirk is stored in my mind but his name is lost to me. I hate myself for that." He shifted his gaze away from Joshua – staring down at his clammy palms in shame. The silverette was glad for the loss of eye contact; it was suffocating him. The look of despair in Neku's eyes was causing his chest to constrict; strangling his lungs. "She changed then. She became the complete antithesis of her previous self. She became my mother. And that terrified me. But I didn't have to put up with that fear for long. She decided I wasn't good enough for her and slept with my neighbour. That neighbour just happened to be the bane of my existence: Seiji - the boy who had made my life hell. He now had a female accomplice in the murder of my life."

"Her name was Shiki Misaki and she was the final blow my heart could take."

Seemingly at the end of his tale, Neku slumped so that his head was in his hands. What is wrong with me? How could I tell him all this? I'm so stupid! She was right I deserved to die; not him. No one would miss me if I died. No one would even notice. I'm not worth anything. I'm not pretty. I'm not smart. I'm not even normal. I'm just a stain on humanity – I just sort of exist. I'm pathetic and repulsive. Everything is my fault.

Joshua had had enough of seeing Neku beat himself up. He couldn't take it anymore. He shuffled closer, cringing at the thought of grass stains on his derrière. He looked out at the forest around them; the prowess of nature making their problems seem so small. But they weren't. Not to those whom it concerned. It shaped the people they had become after all.

"Did you know a Monarch butterfly stays in its cocoon for about two weeks? Over that length of time a rather simple creature undergoes an overwhelming transformation. It then breaks free from the limitations of its previous life - defying gravity, defying the odds, defying what it had previously perceived would be its entire life. Fleeing the monotony of the earth and bursting into the light." He looked over at the ginger teen – looking for any reaction. Though Neku's face couldn't be seen, his aura had lightened slightly. "The dawn will find you soon, Neku. Believe in that - lord knows that certainty has steered me through some very dark days."

He did not touch the other: physical contact is not always the best way to console a person. Sometimes someone just needs you to be near them, not on them. You are there to keep away the ghosts; to keep the nightmares at bay – but you do not need to lead someone away from their minds by holding them. The security of an embrace can be constricting; it prevents the person having to build up the courage to jump into their problems and sort them out independently. A touch is praise; a well done for succeeding in beating the demon in their head.

Neku didn't need to be held. He didn't need to be restricted.

He needed to be set free.


The light had all but vanished when the silence was put to rest.

"I think it's time we went back now Josh." His voice was lighter – the battle seemingly won. Of course it had been Neku to speak first; it had to be that way. Joshua did not want the other to seem rushed. He would wait an eternity if it meant Neku would finally see how beautiful he really was. Past experience said that he wouldn't have to wait that long but Neku didn't know that.

Neku clambered to his feet first seemingly in a rush for something. Joshua was slightly more hesitant; his legs having gone to sleep. The feeling was horrid. Neku extended a hand down toward the silverette; a small ghost of a smile dancing on his lips. Joshua accepted the hand, grateful for the assistance. Neku's spirits were higher as they trudged back to the coffee shop. He wasn't chatty; in fact they barely said a word but he seemed brighter - one step closer to the dawn.