SEVEN:

INSOMNIAC . . . NOT

On our way up the paved drive of the house I looked up to analyze the new damage I'd inflicted for the first time. God . . . I was a destroyer - a walking, talking accident in progress. Carlisle seemed to pick up on my vibe. "Don't let that worry you my love. Tomorrow the repairers will come for the reconstruction." My jaw tightened at the statement. "What's the point, it will probably just be broken again days later . . . or maybe hours." We leaped up through the damaged entry way into the master bedroom again. I let myself fall onto the slanted bed shielding my head with a pillow. "I'm going to sleep", I grumbled. Beside me, Carlisle laughed lowly. "That would be thoroughly interesting to watch."

I unburied my head to look at him. "What are you talking about?" I asked, distracted from my self sponsored pity party in the making. He combed his fingers through my hair. "My love, when is the last time you can recall sleeping since you first woke?" I thought about it, trying to remember, because I knew I had to. But I couldn't – because I hadn't.

"We don't sleep", he answered before I could. I heaved an exasperated sigh. "Well I'm tired and I'm going to sleep." I reached underneath me and adjusted myself, throwing the comforter over us both. Carlisle smiled pulling me up against him. I made myself comfortable reaching one hand over to rest on his shoulder. "Erin", he said lowly, entertained again. "What are we going to do with you?" . . .

The next time I woke up, the comforter was half removed from over us. It was night, early though, I could tell by the hot pink that still lingered along the lower half of the sky. Edward stood concentrating on us . . . on me, just a foot or so off from the bed. As I looked up Carlisle looked bewildered himself. He wore a new outfit now - one of his arms was still curled around me, keeping us close together . . .

I frowned, still half asleep. "Why are you guys staring at me?" "She was", Edward answered – Carlisle. "I could tell by the state of her thoughts." I sat up now. What a way to wake up . . . jeez, I thought slightly irritated. "You mean my dream?" I corrected him. Carlisle was out of bed and on his feet in the next half blink. "How do you think it's possible?" he asked Edward. I growled slipping out of bed. "Stay", I whined to Carlisle hanging onto his arm. Crankily I leaned against it. "I'm just sleeping, God . . . what's the big deal?" Edward grinned, exhaling a breath.

"The big deal is you are not supposed to be able to sleep Erin." He sounded so amped up, it was almost astonishing to me how after witnessing centuries of existence, me - sleeping, could be what grabbed his attention. Scratch that – their attention – because Carlisle's expression looked just as dazed. "Erin my love, were you really sleeping?" He asked now staring down at me. "Yes!" I exclaimed. I turned my head to face away from the both of them who were about to make me abolish the room in a few more seconds.

"It has to be some how relevant to her ability, or maybe the nature of her genes, her being so young", Edward began with another theory. Carlisle sighed. "My shift starts in another few minutes, I'll be late again." I gripped his arm tighter. "No", I mumbled. "I'll be downstairs", I heard Edward whisper.

When he was gone I adjusted my head back around to face Carlisle. His free hand caressed the small of my back as his gaze wandered around the room. "Edward has a surprise for you tonight", he said beginning to walk with me towards the door. My grip on the fabric of his shirt sleeve tightened. "My love" – we were in the hallway now – "please. You know I'm going to have to go."

The floor beneath us was beginning to vibrate. "Angel", Carlisle's voice was soothing but slightly more alert. "I'll stay right here with you." I didn't want it to keep going. I didn't want to destroy anything else. In a sudden flash we were standing just at the bottom foot of the stairs and I was up in Carlisle's arms. Edward was in a half crouch by the front door. "Erin, Calm down", he warned in a whisper. I knew his threatening manner however, was not directly intended for me, but for the burden that came with me. "I'm going to get her outside, I can feel the strain lessening", Carlisle informed him, and in the same ending of his words we were out back a few yards out from the porch deck.

"You're spoiling her Carlisle", Edward reprimanded from beside us. Carlisle gently kissed my cheek. "Calm down my beautiful angel", he sung again . . . "What are we going to do about this?" Edward persisted staring intently out at the patch of forest ahead. "What if a neighbor were wandering?" Then unexpectedly, Carlisle passed me along to Edward. "We'll wait here", Edward answered to whatever request I had not heard. I whimpered as Carlisle vanished into the house.

"It's okay Erin", Edward comforted wearily. "He's coming back." I want down, I thought back. He brought his gaze down on me; it held a certain pain . . . "I know you do my sweetheart." Carlisle reappeared holding a titanium bottle; the scent of blood flooded my nostrils then and I could feel venom pouring into my mouth. I squirmed in Edward's arms and he released me just as Carlisle was close enough for me to leap into his arms. "Here we are angel", Carlisle soothed, holding the bottle up in one hand. I bit down on the top's rubber piece and the frenzy began again . . . couldn't hear, couldn't see . . . all I knew was blood – sweet, hydrating blood.

I came back after the first pull of air. Carlisle tossed the bottle Edward's way, and then used a thumb to wipe the corners of my mouth clean. "That's better isn't it my love?" I only nodded in response, resting my chin on his shoulder. After this particular feed I felt drained. "You should get her up to bed", Edward's voice seemed to echo, like it was somewhere far off, "I'll meet you." "She'll be out soon, maybe I'll make it by at least nine", Carlisle responded subtly. Something was off – had been off – but I couldn't manage to speak – I could barely manage to hold my eyes open. Everything was a stretch . . . far away, and I was just an on looking bystander . . .

I remember going up the stairs. The golden lights in the house were uncomfortable . . . We were in a new room was the most detail I could take in. "I'll be here when you wake my love", he whispered just before laying me down in a new bed, and bringing covers up to my waist. He smiled. "Sleep well." . . .

The first thing I saw was the ceiling. I was alone, that was easy to process since I was on my back, perfectly flat. There were streaks of sunlight pouring through creaks along the black curtains that surrounded me. I did my best to suppress thoughts that were creeping in now. Besides, it was obvious the blood from last night's feed had been tampered with. I had just been in too much of a blood thirsty craze to notice it at the time . . . I didn't want to move yet, the moment I did they would both know I was awake and probably rush up to gawk at me. It was surprising enough they weren't here now. Voices came into frequency then, a discussion in progress . . .

"I have heard of this kind of behavior before", Carlisle's voice was suggesting. "Fits the criteria", Edward responded. "But then again", Carlisle replied, still sounding unsure. "You never seemed to fall into that trend." Edward scoffed. "I was not fifteen, terribly misguided, with a child's unrealistic hopeful beliefs." I could sense a million unholy words ready to string together in my head but fought hard to repress them. "But all the times I ran off, did I not always return?" His question was obviously rhetorical.

Carlisle sighed. "I have seen it many of times before." Seen what before? I wanted to shout. My patience was beginning to simmer. "A newborn will forever be linked to their creator", Edward answered. I wondered if he could pick up on my eavesdropping after all. "With a link naturally comes attachment, and as young as she is the impact of the effect could be a great deal more intensified", he finished.

I slipped out of bed then. Some science experiment I was to them. I could've cared less if Edward picked up on that thought or not, though they still seemed overly engaged in the topic of the mutant newborn. Observing the room around me, I realized this must have been the surprise they both kept trying to distract me with yesterday. This was not just a room – it was my room. . . . The walls were freshly painted a quiet navy blue. The floor was hard wood. And I also had my own bathroom – not that I would be making much use of that aside from routine showers and regular morning maintenance - along with a walk in closet that imitated the one In Carlisle's falling apart room . . . The bed set behind me was all black with and directly across from the bed was a large fifty inch plasma television that rested on top of an elegant black furniture piece.

I shook my head. Bribery at its best . . . Tip toeing over to the left where the closet was located, I slid open the door, not bothering to turn on a light. I gave the area a quick once over; all my clothes hung around in a color coordinated display. Vans label shoes in all my immediate favorite colors were racked along the floor, circulating around the cubed space. . . Materialistically, I would have been gridlocked. But no, this wasn't it . . . This wasn't what was missing. It was him . . .

My Allen . . . my soul mate . . . in a perfect world he would have been mine because I was the one for him and – no one was ever going to love him more than I had . . . more than I still did. Despite the fact that I was no longer human, this fact would never die . . .