Hello all, apologies for the lack of update last week... Updates will probably be every two weeks as chapters are getting longer but I will try to update every week if I can.

Enjoy!


Saveable

Chapter Seven

After Peter had left Tony continued to rest. He wasn't feeling as tired but he still felt weak. His appetite was slowly returning. And he still hadn't gotten out of bed yet. Tony knew he had weakness on his right side. He somehow doubted he would be able to run properly again. He had the feeling he would either have to wear braces like Rhodey had to or use a cane for the rest of his life.

Neither which truly bothered him. He still had his life. When he'd seen Strange raise his finger, Tony had known what he planned would work and that he was about to die.

But he was still here, still alive.

He hadn't expected that.

It was nice to be surprised for once.

There was a knock on his door, pulling him out of his thoughts. Looking up he saw Steve standing at the entrance to his room, looking unsure if he would be allowed to enter.

Tony wasn't sure whether to feel relieved or annoyed that he was here but he nodded his ascent for the man to enter.

Steve walked forward slowly. "Good to see you awake."

"I'm glad to be awake," replied Tony.

Steve sat on the chair placed beside Tony's bed, his eyes sweeping over Tony, taking in the scars on his face and the missing right arm. "Thank you for what you did."

Surprise rushed through Tony. He had expected Steve to lecture him on that stunt. Still, the conversation was young…

"I wish it hadn't have been you. I feel like I failed you."

"We all knew the risks before we embarked on this time-travel idea," said Tony. "The difference is I was lucky to survive…" He lowered his gaze. "Nat didn't have that luck. She's still gone."

"But we will remember her," replied Steve. "We won't forget her."

Tony fell silent. It was uncomfortable talking to Steve. Sure they had worked together and Tony wanted to put the past behind him but… He sighed. "We won't." There was a part of him that wanted to tell Steve what he really wanted to say. But he'd tried that five years ago and Rogers had barely flinched.

"Tony?" asked Steve. "Are you alright?"

Tony turned his gaze towards Steve. "No. Why did you come?"

"To see you," said Steve.

Tony shook his head. "That's a lie. You never come to visit me just because you want to. You visit only when you have a reason."

"That's not true," defended Steve.

Tony threw him a chagrined look. "Do you want me to make a list?"

Steve raised his hands. "Tony, I came to see you. Not for anything else."

"Then why do you look guilty?" accused Tony.

Steve sighed. "Why… why do you have to make things difficult? Why can't you believe I'm here for you?"

"If you were here for me then you would have shown you cared all those years ago. When I made a target of myself with the Mandarin and then had major surgery did you appear? No! Did you bother to call me about SHIELD being compromised? No. But Clint was warned and so was Bruce. But you didn't call me. You only came to me when you need something from me! Like my help and my tech to hunt down Hydra bases. And don't get me started on the Accords again, you know what went down when you abandoned me and left me lying in a pool of my own blood in Siberia. Your half-arsed attempt at an apology letter was more about what you wanted than what was best for the team. You broke this team apart because you couldn't handle not being in control. When I came back to Earth after being lost in space, all you did was interrogate me. If you cared you would have waited until I'd at least rested! And the last five years, Steve, you dragged me back in, against my better judgment! How many times in those five years did you contact me? None!"

"You didn't either, Tony," replied Steve quietly.

Tony glared at him. "I think I had more of a reason to not talk to you. A proper apology would have been nice but no you only come to me when you need something. The evidence speaks for itself." He was feeling tired again but he was determined to see this through.

"I thought you wanted to bury that resentment," noted Steve.

Tony had said that. "I wanted to, for the sake of the team and for the sake of the mission. What you said to me, on my porch, pushed me back in a direction I never wanted to go back to. I wouldn't be here now in this room if you'd just left me alone. I was happy, I was peaceful… Morgan nearly lost me."

Steve's face steeled. "But we bought everyone back."

"Nearly at the cost of my own life," retorted Tony.

"You chose to go for the stones."

"If I didn't, we would all be dead now." Tony sighed. "So why are you really here?"

"I value your opinion, Tony," began Steve, "and I wanted to ask your opinion before I left."

Tony's eyebrows crinkled. "Left?"

"I've volunteered to take the stones back to their rightful places in time. And, I thought, I could go back to after the war and… be with Peggy."

Tony's eyes widened. "What? Steve, you'd be creating an alternate reality. It wouldn't be this reality you'd be living in. We cannot be creating alternate timelines!"

"Why not? You let Loki escape in 2012, there is already a timeline that has been branched out. We can't fix that!" accused Steve.

"I let Loki escape? Really, Rogers? How is it my fault I got clobbered by the Hulk? And you can fix that time-line. Just stun Loki before he can escape, something you can probably do when you return the stone! Stop him from taking it in the first place!" Tony was getting red. Rogers was really riling him up which wasn't good since he was expanding his energy fast.

And he couldn't really defend himself whilst he lay in bed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean – I just…" Steve sighed. "It was the heat of the moment."

Tony chose to ignore Steve's apology. He wasn't interested. "If you go back in time and create an alternate reality you could cause a rift to the timeline. You've got friends and family here who love you."

"I love Peggy," stated Steve.

"You barely knew her. You've built a life here, Steve."

"I could have a life there with her!" retorted Steve, his voice filled with a touch of anger.

"After everything that has happened, are you really going to abandon everybody?" Tony's face was stone-cold in expression. Steve wanted to abandon everyone. "And what about the public who see you as a hero? What do we say to them?"

"Tell them I died," replied Steve easily. "We got attacked and I sacrificed myself."

"So you want to lie to millions of people across the planet just so you can run off and be with a girl you barely knew in the past? And you expect me and others to be happy to play along with the lie?"

"I can't tell them the truth, can I?" asked Steve. "Bucky is ok with it."

"Of course he would be. He's your best friend. He's incapable of telling you the truth." Tony rolled his eyes. He couldn't believe the nerve Steve had. "Steve, if you go back to the past to live with Peggy, I'm not going to protect you. I'm not going to make you into a martyr you're not."

"You're not the first to say that, Tony," answered Steve quietly. "Most people I've spoken to about this… Bruce, Clint… Rhodey… their reactions are all the same as yours. Only Bucky really understands. I'm a man out of time, Tony. I can't live here."

Anger clouded Tony's mind. "Don't bullshit me, Rogers. You've got a life here! You've known us longer than you ever knew Peggy! She had a husband and kids. How is it your right to take that future away from her just so you can be with her? The Peggy you go back to will not be your Peggy. You'll be in an alternate timeline. Steve… if you are looking for my permission or my acceptance, you don't have it. You are running away from people that need you, from a world that needs you!"

"What about you?" replied Steve. "The world needs you too. How could you retire?"

Tony was flabbergasted. "Do you mean retire now or that I retired for the last five years? If you haven't bloody noticed, Rogers, I nearly died. I've lost an arm! I'm… And Pepper wonders why I am throwing away the chance to heal myself! Because you think I should stay out there and keep on fighting. Fuck my family Rogers, right? You get Peggy and a lifetime of retirement and I'm not allowed to because the world needs me? You can't have your peaceful retirement if I can't have mine!" If Tony could have he would have folded his arms across his chest but he lacked one arm. "You cannot take credit for something you didn't do. If you want to run away to the past, to a society that is far less progressed, but is probably more in keeping with your moralistic values, then do so, but you have to accept that the public deserves to know the truth."

Steve sighed and rose from his seat. "I guess I should leave. This conversation isn't going the way I imagined it to go."

Tony's eyes narrowed. "Well, guess what, life doesn't go the way we want either. We have to live with the choices we made."

"Goodbye Tony," said Steve quietly, "It's a shame we couldn't part as friends… I wish you all the best. And," a small smiled crossed Steve's face, "and thank you for giving me this chance."

"Yeah, well, I don't thank you!" Tony shouted back and slumped back into the pillows as Steve left the room. He wanted to scream and shout out his frustration but he didn't have the energy.

Good riddance.


"I hear you shouted at Steve," said Bruce stepping into Tony's room.

Tony glanced up. It was still odd to see Bruce in Hulk form. "Selfish bastard thinks he deserves to retire but I don't."

"I'm sure Steve didn't mean it that way," said Clint, stepping in behind Bruce. "We're pissed too."

"If he didn't, he needs to figure out a way to talk to people," replied Tony bitterly. "Can we not talk about him?"

"Sure." Clint pulled up a chair. "How are you feeling?"

"Alive and armless," replied Tony. "And I barely have sight in my right eye."

"Better than not surviving at all," said Bruce. His own arm was still in a sling. "I doubt my own arm will ever be the same again."

Tony grimaced. He glanced sideways at his right shoulder. It was still odd to see nothing there. "I hope you find a way to get movement in it again, Bruce." He glanced at Clint. "How is the family? I'm surprised you're here with me than with them."

Clint shrugged. "They're good. Adjusting to the idea they've been gone for five years when for them no time passed at all. I have been with them whilst you've been sleeping. I stayed for a few days then left to see you, returning by portal."

"I bet Strange is happy he's a bus service," smirked Tony.

"He seems keen to help when he can," explained Bruce. "He's been in Wakanda since the battle, only popping to other places to bring people to and fro."

Tony wondered why Strange was bothering to hang around. He hadn't really seen the wizard since he'd returned to consciousness. He did want to see the wizard so he hoped Strange would come and see him. If not, once he was able to, Tony would seek him out.

"How long do you think you'll be here for?" asked Clint.

Tony frowned. He and Clint hadn't really gotten along much in the past. "I'm a bit concerned you are showing so much worry for me." He still remembered Clint's words to him at the Raft. They'd hurt.

"I was an idiot. I told Laura about it… about the Raft. She agreed with you. Agreed with the Accords. It made me realise that I was on the wrong side. You were just trying to keep us together…"

"We should have been together at the start of this. We may not have had to live these last five years," replied Tony quietly. But if he hadn't, would Morgan still exist? She was precious to him; his little girl, the light of his life.

"We can't change it now," said Bruce. "We were right not to reverse time. We've changed in the time that has passed. So have other survivors."

Tony nodded, thoughtful.

"You haven't answered my question yet," grinned Clint. "How long will you be here for?"

Tony shrugged with his left arm. "Don't know. Until I'm able to walk I suppose. I haven't got out of bed yet… I need physio… I think I'll be here for a while unless my treatment can be moved back home. I've only been awake just over a day."

"When you do, let us know," said Clint. "You, Pepper, Morgan can come to the farm to meet Laura and the kids. I was thinking of holding a memorial for Nat there. My farm was a second home to her… a place for her to not be the Black Widow…"

"That'll be nice," said Tony. "How are the kids taking her… death?" He was hesitant to say the word.

"They're upset… They were really fond of her… but they know they came back because of her sacrifice," explained Clint sadly. "She was an Aunt to them."

"We'll make sure the world knows the role she played," promised Tony. "We shouldn't hide the truth from the public." He chewed his bottom lip. "That's why I was against telling the world Steve has died when he hasn't. We need him here… He thinks I should continue being a superhero." He frowned. "Question for you two. If you had the means to potentially make a complete recovery but were afraid of being dragged back in to fight, would you put off healing yourself so you wouldn't be called back in?"

"Tony…" Bruce breathed. "Can you heal yourself because if you can that's great news!"

"You shouldn't have to fight if you don't want to," said Clint. "You've done more than enough to earn a right to retire and live peacefully."

Tony smiled sadly. It was nice Bruce and Clint believed he had the right. It made his decision whether to heal himself fully easier to decide. "Do you remember the incident with Extremis?"

"Yeah… vaguely…" Bruce frowned. "I think you tried to tell me about it…"

"In which you didn't really listen," grinned Tony.

"The people who were exploding bombs in the making?" clarified Clint.

"Yeah, that. I could use it on myself, potentially heal myself completely but I'd need to put in a lot of work to do so. Code it to specifically do certain things," explained Tony carefully. "But I don't want to be an Avenger anymore. I just want to be with Pepper and Morgan… See my daughter grow up."

"Trust us, if someone tries to call you back in, they'll have to go through us first," stated Bruce. "You've earned the right to retire, Tony. You nearly lost your life. You've given more than enough."

"And there are plenty of others who can step up to the plate and be an Avenger now," added Clint. "There is more than enough." He leaned forward and patted Tony on his remaining arm. "Take your retirement and heal yourself."

Their acceptance of his desire to retire and leave the life of a superhero behind was all Tony needed to make his decision.

At least some of his team had his back.


Thor briefly visited Tony, bringing with him a large keg of ale to drink from Thor's supplies from New Asgard. Tony secretly had it disposed of since he was sure the ale would be too strong for him to have. He'd mostly gone sober during the last five years, only drinking on the anniversary day of the Decimation.

Thor explained to Tony he was leaving with the Guardians to go up into space once a vigil had been held for Natasha. Rocket, who had got to know Nat quite well in the last few years, was adamant to honour her memory and wanted to stay for it, meaning his team couldn't leave Earth just yet.

Of course, Natasha's vigil depended on when Tony was well enough to attend and Clint was reluctant to do anything without Tony being there.

It was two days later, after a physiotherapy exercise session was over, that Tony received another visitor.

Nebula.

"How's my favourite blue?" grinned Tony.

"Hmm, I see wielding the powers of the universe hasn't changed you that much."

Tony laughed. "Are you insinuating I would allow godly power to go to my head?"

"You could have done anything with those stones," she pointed out. "You could have remade the universe in your own image. But… you didn't." Nebula cocked her head to the side. "You intended to give your life so we could all live. I always knew you were special, Tony."

"That's why you put up with me for twenty-two days in space," retorted Tony quietly, enjoying the banter. His physio session earlier had been exhausting. He hadn't even got out of bed. They were trying to build up his leg muscles to enable him to support himself when he was given the go-ahead to begin walking. It was just disappointing he couldn't even lift his legs that well without help, which didn't bode well for his chances of being able to walk once he was cleared to do so.

"I'm glad I did. You taught me things I will never be able to forget. How to have… fun."

Tony smiled broadly. "Those were good days…" he murmured. His time lost in space with Nebula had been horrible and traumatising but being able to bond with her had helped a lot in keeping himself sane in the horrible circumstances they had found themselves in. He'd enjoyed teaching her new things. "I don't think you have enough fun, blue."

"Hurry up and get out of bed so you can teach me more," indicated Nebula.

"I would if I could." He ran a hand down his right leg. "I may have survived but I am not completely intact."

"Better than being dead."

Tony grimaced. He'd rather be alive than dead but the long term effects of using the Infinity Stones were still to be discovered. Using them had nearly killed him. He'd been lucky.

"You're a hero, you know," she said quietly. "The whole world is celebrating you. All wishing for you to make a recovery."

Tony swallowed. "At least the world cares…" He'd never thought the world would. He'd caused too much shit in his own mind to believe the world would miss him if he died. Their reaction to his near-death was heart-warming. "Hopefully within a week, I will be able to start trying to stand. I can't wait to get out of this bed."

"How are Morgan and Pepper?"

"Wanting me to come home," replied Tony. Pepper was trying to get the doctors to release him, to allow him to go home. He was sure he would recover better in familiar surroundings.

"Just tell me who I need to kill to get them to let you leave," stated Nebula.

Tony studied her expression carefully. He wasn't sure if she was being serious or not. She was difficult to read but he had got to know her over the years. "Maybe not kill…. Threaten, yes. But, don't worry about it. If they don't give me the go-ahead to leave in the next seven days I'm discharging myself." He'd already discussed it with Pepper. They both knew Tony felt well enough to leave. He was stable, eating and drinking and the only obstacle preventing Tony from being discharged were that he hadn't walked yet. He could understand the precautions but he could easily carry on his exercises at home.

"I could threaten them now… You'd be home in the next hour."

"Always looking out for me…" smiled Tony.

Nebula's lips twitched. "We're friends."

"If there is one thing I never thought would ever happen to me…" he started.

Nebula cocked her head to the side. "What?"

"That I would count someone from outer space to be one of my best friends and someone I could trust with my life…"

Nebula twitched. "Not many people would trust me with their life…"

"I'd trust you with mine, Morgan and Pepper's safety any day. You and Rhodey… Thank you. I'll miss you blue when you leave."

"I'll stay in touch."

"You better," laughed Tony. "I don't want you to forget about me."

"It's impossible to forget about you, Stark. And from what Danvers has reported the universe will never forget you."

Tony's eyebrows crinkled. "What do you mean?"

"You're the Thanos slayer, Stark. You're not just a hero on a global scale, but on a universal scale."

Tony could only stare at her in surprise. "Really?"

Nebula's lips twitched up in a smile. "Yes. Really."

Tony couldn't believe it. "Wow."

To be continued...

Please let me know what you think!

I didn't like Steve's ending in Endgame. It smacks of betrayal and selfishness. Steve built a life with the Avengers and threw it all away for the sake of a woman he barely knew, so naturally Tony is angry about it, as are Clint and Bruce. The difference is that they are all aware of Steve's plans prior to him leaving and he's discovered not many people are pleased with the idea of him going back to the past. Plus, Steve expects Tony to carry on fighting whilst he gets to live his happy, undeserved, retirement.

Yeah, I'm bitter about Steve's ending and I wish the general public in the MCU knew the truth of what Steve did at the end of Endgame because I don't think the majority of people would be happy about it.

I love Tony and Nebula's friendship and wanted to expand more on that.

Plus, Tony is not just Earth's hero, he is the universe's hero.

Next update hopefully next week but will likely be in two weeks.

Until next time,

the-writer1988