First parts in Lights POV

Disclaimer: OWN NOTHING! BUT THE PLOT OFCOURSE …OH and I don't own 'Would it matter' by skillet.

The Demon and the Light: Reborn

Chapter 7: reasons

If I wasn't here tomorrow

Would anybody care

If my time was up I wanna know

You were happy I was there

If I wasn't here tomorrow

Would anyone lose sleep

If I wasn't hard and hollow

Then maybe you would miss me

Would anybody care if I wasn't here? Would anybody miss me? It's true that maybe my parents and sister would miss me but would I be missed by others? Will they even remember me? Or will I just be a passing memory?

Would they really miss me? Would they really care if I wasn't here? Would it matter if I died? Why don't they care about me now? Why have I been forgotten? Why? Why does my heart always get broken?

I know I'm a mess and I wanna be someone

Someone that I like better

I can never forget

So don't remind me of it forever

What if I just pulled myself together

Would it matter at all

What if I just try not to remember

Would it matter at all

All the chances that have passed me by

Would it matter if I gave it one more try

Would it matter at all

What if I did forget everything? Would anybody care enough to help me regain all my knowledge? No, I don't think they will… but I wont forget, it is impossible… but I want to forget… I want to forget all the pain, all the memories, all the time's where I cried and there was no one there to wipe away my tears.

If I wasn't here tomorrow

Would anybody care

Still stuck inside this sorrow

I've got nothing and going nowhere

I've lost what I truly wanted…I've lost the one person that really made me feel worthy… I've lost him… and at this stage I don't know if I will ever get him back… Will I get him back? Will he even cared if I disappeared? I don't think I want to know because I'm afraid that the answer will break me into a tiny pieces.

I know I'm a mess and I wanna be someone

Someone that I like better

I can never forget

So don't remind me of it forever

What if I just pulled myself together

Would it matter at all

What if I just try not to remember

Would it matter at all

All the chances that have passed me by

Would it matter if I gave it one more try

Would it matter at all

Would they all be better off without me? Is this what the lord is trying to tell me? Or am I better off without them? No that cant be… I'm nothing without the people I have now… but is it the same for them?

I know I'm a mess and I wanna be someone

Someone that I like better

Can you help me forget

Don't wanna feel like this forever...forever

What if I just pulled myself together

Would it matter at all

What if I just try not to remember

Would it matter at all

All the chances that have passed me by

Would it matter if I gave it one more try

Am I wrong? I truly hope that I am… what if…

If I live tomorrow

Would anybody care

Stuck in this sorrow

Going nowhere

All the chances that have passed me by

Would it matter if I gave it one more try

Would it matter at all

What if… what if they do care? No what am I thinking? They do care. They will care if I had to die, they would miss me and they will always remember who and what I was, I could never be just a passing memory to them. Never. If I did end up losing my memories and knowledge they'd do anything in their powers to help me regain it.

That's right. They'd do anything to help me. They'd stop at nothing to ensure that I was happy. They do care about me… they haven't forgotten me, they will never forget me. It's true that my heart does get broken but they have always been there to pick up the pieces. And I would always be happy to let them.

If I were to forget they would care, they aren't selfish. Why would I even ask that? Forgetting is impossible, but that's a good thing. I don't want to forget anything. I may have bad memories but the good always weighs out the bad, doesn't it? And I have loads of happy memories involving my family, my friends… and him.

What am I thinking? 'the time's where I cried and there was no one there to wipe away my tears' they were always there to wipe at my tears when I cried. They were always there when I had to face hard things in my life and they will forever be there.

They were there for me from the time I was born. From the time I made my first steps, when I spoke my first words, when I started kindergarten, when I started the first grade and ended my seventh, when I started high school and they will be there when I finish. They will support me. All of them.

They will be my pillars and I will be the bridge. They will hold me up high above the water and away from harm.

Have I lost what I truly want? Have I lost L? no I haven't and I never will. He may not remember me fully but I know that he loves me… even if he himself doesn't know this… I know. And that's how I know that he will care if I were to leave, if I were to die, if I were to forget… he'd shatter just like I did when he lost all memories of his past.

I can't say that they are nothing without me but I sure am nothing without them. Like I said they are my pillars, if I lose one I will come tumbling down. which is why I can't lose any of the bonds that I have made. It would kill me.

'You are wrong Light Yagami. If anything these humans that you interact with care about you as much as you do them. Even L and his brothers. Heck even Watari loves you! And that's because you imprinted a piece of yourself in each and every single one of their hearts.

'An plus, they aren't the only ones that will be completely heartbroken if you were to die or whatever. There's all the people at school that absolutely adore you. They will miss you just as much as you'd miss them! You may not know this but you have imprinted yourself into many peoples hearts…

'and it kills me to say this but you have even done so to me. You are like my kid or something family. And I would be very sad if you were to go. So please, stop thinking like this' Ryuk mutters inside of my head and I look over at him.

He was smiling. "Thank you" thank you for everything. "You're welcome"

(L's POV)

I don't know why but I just felt really… disheartened. I don't know, I just felt my heart squeeze in my chest for an unknown reason. I don't know why such a thing can make a person feel so crestfallen… it could possibly be nothing…

But why is it still happening? Why is everything around my heart tightening almost painfully? Is something wrong with me? Maybe I'm still feeling a little sick from the other night's drunken haze…no... It wasn't that…

"Matt, what's wrong with me?" I ask the angel next to me. He shrugs his shoulders. "Nothing really, I would say that you're hurting… maybe… I'm not sure though cause I don't know why you'd be hurting"

Hurting? Well I was kinda hurting but it didn't feel like the kind of hurt that you get when you sprain your ankle or whatever… it felt deeper… and it felt almost like it wasn't my pain… like it wasn't my heart that was going like this but someone else's.

"That's right! You and Light are bonded so when he feels like this you feel it too!" Matt exclaims as he throws his hands up in the air as if he had just done something great.

"So Light is the one that is hurting?" why is he hurting? I mean I haven't seen him since the morning we woke up together and he just left.

I will admit this but only to myself, if anybody asks I will deny it… it stung like a motherf*cker when Light just left like that… was that what he was feeling or what I was feeling?

"Both" Matt says with a chuckle. "Light affects you more than you are willing to admit, L"

"That could be true… but even if he does affect me I still don't know why he does" I mumble and the angel hits me upside the head. "What was that for!" I shout at him and he gives me an angry glare. "L, the reason why he affects you so much is because you love him. I thought that you would have put all the puzzle pieces together!

"You may not remember much about him but there is one part of you that does remember him and that is your heart! And that's why your hurting so much. Because there is a void in your heart that wants to be refilled.

"Your heart wants that one thing that will make it whole, doesn't matter if you don't remember anything, your heart will do that for you because it will never forget about the one person that made it beat like a normal heart." He paused to look at me seriously.

"L, your heart is telling you that it wants Light to fill that void, wants Light to make you feel whole again."

I stare at him in slight shock. He spoke about it with so much intensity that I nearly fell out of my chair. Who knew he took such matters seriously.

And again I get hit on the head but with something fluffy. I look at the angel with confusion. "Did you just hit me with your wing?" he nods his head. "If I hit you with my hands you will server a concussion."

"Oh, how nice of you" I say sarcastically. "L, you need to understand that Light is doing everything in his power to get to remember and it's almost like you are pushing him away, no you are pushing him away. Its hurting him and its hurting you.

"You are denying your heart what it wants and you are denying Light" he finished off and again his word put me into a stunned silence.

"I'm being tough on you because I truly do care for you and I want whats best for you…. But you don't seem to want the same things" he mumbles with a sigh.

"It's not that I don't want it… its just… the first time I got a memory it was of Light crying and begging me to do something and saying he couldn't lose me… I… it hurt to see him cry… it hurt even more to know that I was the reason as to why he cried and why he was hurting…

"I don't want to remember anything because I know for a fact that I will get more of these memories… and it kills me to see Light cry… to see him hurting… it just plain simple HURTS. So sue me if I don't want to remember for these reasons"

[Silence]

"You will find that even though you had moments like that, you had even more happy moments… moments that any person would have cherished with their very life. L, there is no use hiding; it's going to get you, and the people around you, nowhere. So pull your head out of your arse and start remembering"

[Silence]

"I hate you"

"No you don't. but I am glad that you're finally going to do something that will benefit you and your family."

"How troublesome you are"

"Why thank you, I don't even try"

Angels. [sigh]

A/N:

HIIIIIII! I have been up since four o'clock! Yay! I couldn't sleep… oh welp. My tonsils feel better but I'm still sick! There will be another chapter updated later tonight cause I'm in a good mood! Was this chap nice though?

Kitty: Thanks! I haven't watched that but I will look into it. I know the feeling of not having any L and Light fics to read… although I'm also a little stumped because none of the stories I am currently following are being updated…it's a sad story.

Double L: Thanks for the concern! And I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Miss. One: Thanks! I wanna ask you if my writing looks better than what it did before? I have been trying my hardest to get it right.. Honest opinions please!

Anistasia D Flight1962: WELCOME MY NEW REVIEWER!AND THANKS FOR THE REVIEW…EVE THOUGH IT WAS TWO LETTERS! IT'S APPRECIATED!

BYE!

REVIEW!