OK, you know how Haruhi tells (*coughorderscough*) Kyon to pretty much lick her path clean, and he kind of ends up doing it anyways, regardless of whatever argument he makes?
Well, I think I figured out why...
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
Kyon is just your normal, average, everyday first-year highschool student, with all the hopes, dreams, and worries that came with it.
That, plus a little extra. Especially in the "worry" department.
Most of that worry came in the form of a fellow class mate, Haruhi Suzumiya. To put it simply, Haruhi was had the power to bend reality to her will.
Only she did know it!
Long story short, Haruhi started a club she called the SOS Brigade, which had five members; Haruhi(god), Kyon, Yuki Nagato(alien), Mikuru Asahina(time-traveler), and Itsuki Koizumi(esper).
Not that that's out of the way...
One of the bigger worries Kyon had (on a regular basis) was Haruhi's constant stream of random, esoteric "requests" that came from her mouth. All directed at Kyon.
"Kyon, I know you got here before me, but would you kindly pay for the whole meal since I don't feel like it?"
"Kyon, go get some food from the cafeteria, would you kindly? I'm starving!"
"Kyon, I forgot my bag in the classroom. Would you kindly go get it for me before I give you the death penalty?"
"Kyon, would you kindly get out so Mikuru and I can change? NOW!"
See what I mean?
Anyways, he always went along with her crazy suggestions, because if he didn't, he could very well bring the world to an end with the tantrum that would most likely ensue.
At least, that's what he always thought.
Today, he has a revelation that his "free will" wasn't as free as he thought it was. In...
The Twilight Zone
...
...
...
No, I'm kidding, this isn't a "Twilight Zone" parody.
It's something else entirely...
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
Koizumi; *simles* So you say that you think Miss Suzumiya has somehow remade the universe so that you will always do whatever she say without question, no matter how good your arguments are?
Kyon; *nods* Yeah. I figured you'd know if anything like that happened, what with your esper powers or whatnot.
Koizumi; *keeps smiling* You're right, I can sense when she uses her powers to an extent, and especially so if she decided to remake the universe. However, you will be pleased to know that she has not attempted anything of that magnitude since that time shortly after we all met.
Kyon; *disappointed* Then why am I acting like this?
Koizumi; *still smiling* I have a theory about that. To help with this experiment, I'll need one of Nagato's science fiction books. Get me one.
Kyon; *indignant* No, get it yourself!
Koizumi; *smiling on* My apologies, it was a bit rude, was't it? Would you kindly get me one of Nagato's books? *Kyon gets book* Ah, it's just as I thought.
Kyon; *confused* Now why did I just do that?
Koizumi; *Mr. Smiles* You see Kyon, a while ago, Miss Suzumiya was searching the Internet like she usually does. One on the sites she found was about a utopia under the sea that mysteriously disappeared in the 1950's called "Rapture". Haruhi didn't look into it further, (she thought it was a fake,) but Nagato did some checking of her own. Apparently, it was scientific bastion that believed in progress at the expense of all morals.
Kyon; *suspicious* Is this going somewhere?
Koizumi; *smiler of the year* Be patient, I'm getting to that. Anyways, they experimented a lot with genetic manipulation, particularly on children.
Kyon; *shocked* That's horrible!
Koizumi; *smiling bastard* Yes, it was. However, the point I was getting at was that they were able to condition people to respond to certain phrases in a certain way. For example, you are conditioned in a way where whenever you hear the phrase "Would you kindly?", you obey any order given to you without question. Sure, you can protest, but your body is unable to do anything but.
Kyon; *looses heart* So I really am Haruhi's slave...
Koizumi; *smiles some more* I suppose that's as good a qualification as any.
Haruhi; *bursts into room with Mikuru* Kyon! Hold Mikuru down for me: I've got some new ideas for matching costumes that I'd like to try out. *grins evily*
Mikuru; *whimpers pathetically*
Kyon; *adamently* NO!
Haruhi; *dangerously, through gritted teeth* Would you kindly...Hold. Mikuru. DOWN.
Kyon; *holds Mikuru down* I'm very sorry, Miss Asahina, but it's in my genetics.
Haruhi; *with glee* Now strip her, Kyon! Strip like the wind!
"Would you kindly?"
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
Well, there you have it; the REAL reason Kyon can't say no to Haruhi's demands. And don't forget to give me new ideas for chapters. It's how we writers thrive.
Now, I know this might be a bit apropos, but I've just got to say it.
Review, would you kindly?
