Two Weeks on Lake Michigan Chapter 7
Then Jane finally broke the silence in true Rizzoli fashion when she said, "Geeez, Aunt Marie, you're killing me here."
Marie just laughed and squeezed Jane's arm. "Why would you say that, Jane?"
"Well, because I think I was holding my breath the whole time you were telling me the part about the kiss. I know that there has never been a time in my life when a kiss has even come close to that."
"And that's exactly how I felt. We spent the rest of the night in each other's arms. We would kiss, fall asleep, wake up, kiss some more, giggle about something, and then of course, kiss. We didn't do anything else that night, and it was satisfying, and beautiful, and amazing."
They were both grinning now. "Let's sit down here for a second, okay?"
"Sure, Aunt Marie."
"We still had two more weeks together before her husband was coming back from his business trip. I had some vacation time accumulated so I took some of it so we'd have more time together. We spent mornings at the beach, then we would take the kids out for lunch or go window shopping. Our nights were spent learning how to love one another, exploring, watching each other sleep. It was sweet and passionate and almost pure in its tentative exploration. I can still see her beautiful face sleeping when the sun was just starting to come up, then the oh-my-god panicked look as we grabbed our clothes and scrambled to get her home before her mother and the kids woke up."
Marie hesitated as if reflecting on a new thought.
"I know I should have felt guilty. I was sleeping with a married woman. I had never experienced anything like this and as selfish as I know it was, I didn't have the courage to let it go. I knew in the secret, dark recesses of my mind that this was going to end. And I knew that when it did I might never recover. But given the choice of having her for a little while or not having her at all, well, you know what I chose."
Jane finally asked, "Did Catherine ever talk about her marriage?"
"Yes, when I asked her about it, she only said that she liked her husband well enough. Their parents had almost arranged the marriage. Catherine was expected to have and raise the children. This was a very old family, ridiculously old fashion. But for some reason, she was compliant in it and we both knew she would never have the courage to leave him or the children. We left it unspoken."
Marie saw the shocked look on Jane's face.
"Yeah, I know Jane, it wasn't the dark ages, but again these people married to protect their fortunes, not to let riff raff like us into their world. That's what those debutant balls were all about, keeping it in the family. The young women were encouraged to go to private girls' schools and women's colleges so they could be intelligent, wives, not so they could be independent women. I'm not going to generalize about an entire class of men, but Catherine's husband was gone most of the time, and when he was home he treated her like just another servant. And maybe that's why she was with me in the first place. So maybe I should have thanked him for being a neglectful, arrogant, ass.
"These women did what they were brought up to do. And to be fair, a lot of them had rebelled. But that was not going to be the case here. This was someone who was sweet and gentle and timid and I didn't nor could I expect her to be someone different from who I fell in love with.
"So what happened when he came home?" Jane's fists were clenched like she was ready to fight.
"It was simple. There were no big scenes, he never found out about us. He didn't kill her, I didn't kill him. He just came home a week later and said we're selling this house and the one in Chicago. I have to go to France to run the bank's business there. I don't have a choice and neither do you. Your mother is welcome to come.' End of story, I'm going, you're coming, no discussion."
"Oh, Aunt Marie," Jane whispered as she put her knuckle to her lips and fought back tears.
Marie wasn't able to control her tears the way Jane had. Jane looked over at her Aunt and watched her put her hands to her face and emit one of the most gut-wrenching sounds she'd ever heard. It was part human, part animal, and it came from someplace so deep inside her that it could only be called primal. It was all the air that she'd held in her lungs for 30 years forced out through her vocal chords. It was the most horrible sound Jane had ever heard.
The younger moved closer so she could wrap her arms around her wounded aunt, and rock her while she cried, crying with her. They stayed like that until Marie began to lift her head and pulled out a tissue.
"Okay, Janie, that's it, I'm okay now. It's been a long time since I've allowed myself to have that, and it actually feels good to get rid of it again."
Jane stood and offered her hand to Marie to help her up. "Shall we keep going, or do you want to go back home."
"I think, back home. Give me a few minutes, then I'm going to take you to some wonderful places along the coast. I want you to see Saugatuck and some of the other beaches and parks that are close by. Come on, Janie, no more sadness today.
