With a glance and a hint of a smile at JJ, Spencer slipped his hands out of hers. He took a few sips of the water Morgan had brought him and set it back on the table. He looked down, his eyes focused on his hand that played absently with the watch on his arm.

"When I was seven, my dad took mom to go see a psychiatrist - Dr. Bradley," he quietly began his story. "That was when she was officially diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic and he started her on medication. Every two months she was scheduled to go to his office. She was still seeing him when my dad left. At first, I was able to get her over there to see him by myself. When they would ask about my father, I would just say he had dropped us off and would be back soon to pick us up. But by the time I was twelve, I couldn't get her to leave the house to go to the doctor. They extended her prescription a couple of times, but eventually refused to refill it without seeing her."

Morgan and JJ sat silently, listening to every word.

"One day, I came home from school and heard talking in the kitchen. I was surprised to recognize Dr. Bradley's voice. He was talking quietly, joking with her in a way that sounded...almost flirtatious," Spencer continued, a look of disgust crossing his face. "They both greeted me with smiles when I finally entered the kitchen, then Dr. Bradley suggested my mom take the medication he had for her. I didn't see what it was, but she took it without question. I stood in the corner of the kitchen cabinets while they continued to talk."

"Not long after I could tell my mom was getting sleepy and seemed to have trouble keeping her eyes open. I asked what he had given her, but he said she was fine, it was just something to help her relax. He suggested I help her to her room to lay down, so I did. She was asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow."

"I was nervous to leave her alone, but I went back out into the kitchen. Dr. Bradley was still at the table. He said he wanted to talk to me and asked me to sit next to him." Spencer paused, biting the corner of his lip.

"He mentioned that he hadn't seen my father in quite some time and had started to worry about us when we missed appointments, so he had stopped by to check on us. My mom must have remembered him since she let him in before I came home. She would never let a stranger inside, but she trusted the doctor," Spencer said, a pained look crossing his face.

"He started telling me about the conversation he had with my mom," Spencer continued, his words spilling out quickly. "I'm not sure how he got her to talk so much, but he knew everything about our situation! How she had been feeling, how long ago my dad left, the financial trouble we were in, how much I was doing around the house. I was shocked. And the more he said, the more scared I got. He was a doctor so he couldn't just ignore our situation! I thought they would take her away from me, put her in a home somewhere and I would go into foster care, ending up God only knows where." He stopped and took a breath, slowing himself down.

"But he surprised me. He said he wanted to help, that he didn't want to see anything happen to me or my mom. I began to have hope that maybe he wouldn't report it and we could stay together in our home. He told me he could continue to visit us at home instead of us having to come into the office for her medications. He then said he could even help us financially, at least enough to cover some of the bills."

"I couldn't believe it, that someone would do something so selfless for us, someone who barely knew us. I should have known better." Spencer stopped. Pressure was pushing on his chest and tears were building up in his eyes. He swallowed hard, trying to keep the emotion at bay while his leg started to bounce with nervous energy.

"Take your time. You don't have to rush through this," JJ said, trying to comfort him.

A moment of distress crossed his face. "If I don't, I won't finish," he said. He tried to breathe deeply to calm himself.

"He said all he wanted in return...was, was to spend some time with me. He..." Spencer shook his head in frustration, struggling to get the words out, and closed his eyes for a second. Clearing his throat, he tried again, "He put his hand on my leg, and I knew...," His breath hitched and an emotional strain was in his voice. "I knew! I knew what he wanted," he said, glancing up at his friends before looking away. He couldn't control his nerves anymore. He stood and started pacing back and forth as he talked, his arms hugging his midsection.

"There were a couple of older kids who bullied me in school. They had tried to force me to do things before. Somehow I always got away before it went too far, though. But they had the same look in their eyes as he did right then."

"After he did that I stood up and scooted away. I didn't want anything to do with him. But he just smiled at me like he already knew he had me." Spencer closed his eyes and could see that smile, sending a chill down his spine. He began to talk faster, the words pouring out of this mouth. "He started to tell me stories of all the horrible things he'd seen in his line of work. He spoke of the kids he worked with who had spent their lives in foster care – all the abuse they'd gone through, the beatings, the rapes. He told me how many of those kids turned to drugs, ran away to live on the streets. He talked about the ones he sent to institutions because they lost their minds and became a threat to themselves or those around them."

Spencer paused as his breath quickened, "He then told me about the state-run facilities my mom could end up in if we were torn apart. He talked about the horrible things that happened in those places, behind locked doors, in the middle of the night. How those people were completely at the mercy of anyone looking to exert their power over someone. He told me that many of them just ended up like zombies, closing off from the world... or they committed suicide."

Tears were starting to run down Spencer's face as he paced more frantically. His voice shook as he rambled on, voicing all the thoughts and emotions he'd held trapped in his mind for years and years. "What could I do? How could I let my mom go to a place like that? I couldn't! She would live a horrible existence and then die there! She didn't deserve that."

"And that was it. He knew he had me. He knew he could always use that threat against me and I would do anything to keep it from happening. So he asked if we had a deal. I couldn't talk, my throat closed up and nothing would come out, so I just nodded my head. I agreed to that!" Spencer closed his eyes and shook his head. "From that day on, he started a routine. He would come over, talk to my mom for a bit and give her something that put her to sleep. After that, he would come into my room…and…and he…" Spencer tried to continue, but sobs began to break through.

Morgan and JJ had been watching Spencer as his anxiety had slowly increased through his story. They wanted to comfort their friend, but were afraid to approach him. However, seeing him begin to lose control of his emotions brought them both to their feet.

Spencer's eyes darted between them as they moved in front of him. "I didn't want it!" he said, pleading with them to understand while slowly backing away. "I swear I didn't! Please believe me! I didn't want to do those things. What could I do? Was there something else I should have done?" He put his head down, with his hands on his head, pulling at his hair. "No, no, no, it's all my fault, isn't it? I let him do those things!"

JJ had tears running down her cheeks listening to the pain in his voice.

Morgan was starting to feel panic of his own, seeing his friend suffering the same doubts and thoughts he had processed through in his own past. "Hey, hey, hey, kid, you didn't have any choice," Morgan said, his hands out in front of him. "And you didn't want it, we believe you! You did what you had to do for your mom. You're a good kid and no one should have ever done that to you. It's their fault those things happened to you, not yours." He tried to make his voice calming as he stared into Spencer's bloodshot eyes. "It's not your fault. It's not."

Spencer was starting to look exhausted as he cried and he swayed a little. Morgan reached out to try and steady him. "Don't touch me," Spencer whispered as he jerked his arm away. He stumbled back into a side table, knocking it over along with everything on top in a loud clatter.

Spencer startled at the noise, which seemed to have snapped him out of his emotional state, though he was still breathing heavily. He stared down at the table for a moment before looking over at JJ and Morgan. He tried blinking the tears out of his eyes as he turned away, his gaze moving back to the table. He kneeled down to set everything back. With unsteady hands, he fumbled with the items scattered on the floor. "I'm sorry," he said, embarrassment evident in his quiet voice. "I didn't mean to act like that."

JJ dropped down to her knees next to him, giving him a teary smile while she helped grab some things. "There is nothing to be sorry for, Spence. What you went through…no one should ever have to go through something like that. And to hold that in all these years," she said, shaking her head, "you needed to let it out. I'm just glad we were here for you to be able to do that."

Spencer looked at her as the tears started to fall again. She scooted over against the wall, then reached over, bringing him towards her, pleased that he let her without pulling away.

...

Morgan watched JJ with Spencer and tried to calm his own emotions, but he just couldn't take it anymore. "Sick bastard," Morgan growled. He slammed his arm into the wall, causing both JJ and Spencer to jump. He turned around and looked at JJ.

"How disgusting does someone have to be to do that? To use their authority and fear to make a little kid do things like that! If I could find that sick..."

"Morgan," JJ cut him off, shaking her head slightly. Spencer still had tears on his cheeks, though he seemed to be quieting down.

Morgan closed his eyes tightly, taking a deep breath while he rubbed his face with his hands. "I'm sorry," he said more calmly, "It's just..."

"I know," JJ agreed, completely understanding what he was feeling.

They were quiet for a while, trying to process everything they just heard from their youngest team member, the baby of their family. Spencer eventually pulled away from JJ and leaned against the wall, fidgeting with his hands.

Morgan was slowly getting his anger back under control and sat on the edge of the couch with a sigh. "Do you know where is he now?" he asked, half hoping he was somewhere near so he could go vent his rage.

Spencer's jaw clenched for a second. "Dead," he said bitterly. "Died a few years ago from a heart attack. Before that he lived the ideal life - good job, nice home, wife, kids...grandkids." He sighed, blinking back angry tears.

He glanced up to meet Morgan's eye briefly before looking away. "Morgan, I want to apologize to you."

"For what?" Morgan asked, confused.

"After we found out what had happened to you when you were younger, I wanted to tell you. I did! I wanted to tell you how I understood, how I had been there, too, and knew how it felt. But I just couldn't do it. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you like I should have been," Spencer said, voice cracking.

"Hey, Reid," Morgan replied. "There is no one who would understand better than me how hard it is to tell people about things like that. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. Just because you didn't tell me about your past, doesn't mean you weren't there for me. You gave me all the support I needed," Morgan told him, full of sincerity.

Spencer gave him a shy smile of thanks. "Right after everything that happened with you in Chicago, I started to wonder if I was the only one the doctor had...taken advantage of, and if it was possible that he still was. I decided to track him down. That's when I discovered that he had recently died. If he was still alive, I don't know if I would have had the courage to tell my story or not, just to make sure it didn't happen to anyone else."

"I understand," Morgan sighed. "Unfortunately, for some reason, I was under the illusion that Carl wouldn't do that to any other kids, until it was too late. I don't know why. Maybe you just feel so alone at the time, so different than everyone around you, that you just can't imagine there's anyone else who's been there." He looked sadly over at Spencer. "And you sincerely hope those you care about haven't been there."