(A.N) This is an omake that Teninshigen decided to write. All credit for this goes to him.

[This is Non-cannon.]


Totomaru panted as he ran as fast as his feet could carry him. As he did so, his mind raced alongside his body. He cursed his friend for running off ahead. He cursed the burning in his lungs. He cursed the distance between Heiwana Village and the Rune Knight station where they'd started.

At the same time, he prayed his friend hadn't bitten off more than he could chew. He prayed the village and its people could be saved. He looked forward to a fight, to a new chance to test himself.

But when the shadow rolled over him from behind, causing him to look over his shoulder, his thoughts stalled. His feet did too, causing him to topple forward and roll to a stop.

He didn't pay attention to his new bruises, though. He just stared up into the sky, at the source of the shadow, and his entire thought process amounted to one idea. 'David...is one lucky bastard.'

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"Finally!" Zancrow laughed. It was a horrid, high-pitched chorus that screamed of malice. "You ain't going anywhere now, you worthless fly!" He stalked towards the suspended Speed Mage, menace in every step. "I'm gonna rip you to pieces. Then, I'm gonna burn those pieces 'till there's nothing left!" He stood right in front of David, looking into his eyes. The God Slayer didn't have pupils - he had burning pits in the center of his eyes. "Doesn't that sound like fun?!"

David couldn't give a reply. Pain had locked his jaw shut and thrown away the key. "I think…" Zancrow mused, "that I'm gonna start...with this."

David's sight wasn't the best at that moment. Between the tint of his magic and the pain that clouded his vision, he was mostly seeing shapes. But he could still see well enough to register the three fingers Zancrow was extending towards his right eye...and the shadow that suddenly seemed to roll over the village's remains.

That caught his attention as much as anything could. Had the clouds of ash and smoke returned? He couldn't quite crane his neck enough to check, but Zancrow could. The God Slayer turned his face upward to find the source of the sudden darkness.

He found himself looking up into a boiling cauldron of clouds so thick night may as well have fallen. It stretched from one side of the horizon to the other, blotting out all light. As he watched it continued to grow - marching inexorably forward until the entire sky was hidden by its nebulous abyss.

Lightning played in its depths as he watched the clearly magical storm swirl overhead. As the clouds began to congregate in a place directly above the God Slayer and his opponent, they were forced downward - creating a bulging shape.

Oddly enough, the longer Zancrow looked at the approaching mass of clouds, the more he thought he could make out facial features…

Thunder rolled. It made a sound like "NO ONE MAY LAY HANDS ON DAVID-SAMA EXCEPT JUVIA!"

Zancrow's eyes widened just as the roll-like curls of cloudy hair at the storm-face's sides opened eyes of crackling lightning. They pulled away from the main body of the storm with the hiss of hurricane-force winds grinding against one another, opening black mouths wide as they lunged for the ground like serpents.

David was tossed aside in favour of Zancrow erupting into black flames and crouching down. Then, turning his face upward once more, the God Slayer leapt with a vicious laugh and his fists extended to do battle with the storm itself.

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David lay on his side taking as many shallow breaths as he could manage. The broken ribs impeded anything deeper, and he was having trouble gathering the will to stand up.

"David-sama…" A familiar voice murmured, as a blue-shaded shape appeared in his field of view. Kneeling down beside him, Juvia carefully brushed a hand over his face, clearing away blood, ash and sweat. "Juvia is sorry she didn't get here sooner."

"'S fine…" David managed to wheeze. "But, why're you here?"

"Juvia will always come when David-sama needs her." The Water-Woman said simply...before her cheeks starting turning red. "She is happy to serve at his whim and attend to his every need…"

Something between a sigh and a chuckle managed to rasp its way out of David's throat. That explanation really did say it all. Juvia would be Juvia. "Well, thanks." He told her, grinning a bit lop-sidedly. With a groan of effort and some help from Juvia, he managed to sit up and look around. "Where's Totomaru?" With a sudden flash of panic, he continued. "And where's Zancrow?!"

"The irresponsible interruption is being slow as usual..."

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Totomaru, who was doing his best to jog toward Heiwana in nigh-total darkness and under his own personal rainfall, sneezed.

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"And the scum who dared to lay hands on David-sama is over there."

David turned in the direction Juvia had indicated. For a moment, he couldn't see anything resembling the God Slayer. Then he realised that what he'd thought was rain was, in fact, a solid pillar of water stretching into the heavens.

No, not a pillar...a vortex.

As he squinted, he caught a glimpse of a primarily-yellow form being whirled around its edges, trailing bubbles.

"That won't hold him forever." David grunted, making an effort to get back to his feet. "I've got to-"

"David-sama must stay here and rest with Juvia." The blunette stated simply, grabbing the Speed Mage by the shoulders and forcing his head down on to her lap. "David-sama has done enough already. Juvia will finish taking out the trash."

The blond hissed between his teeth as his ribs twinged. "But that guy's-"

"Juvia knows; Master Jose made her and the other Element Four members memorise many of the continent's most powerful Dark Mages just in case."

David blinked. "But you still think you can take him?"

Juvia smiled - and while to David it was a warm, loving expression, a shiver went down Zancrow's spine where he was still trapped in the miles-high whirlpool. "Juvia will certainly do her best."

The Water-Woman made to lay her precious one down carefully on the ground, but stopped. His hand had reached and taken hers. When she looked to his face, she found his eyes locked on her own, his usual bright blue gone electric with crackling magic. "Juvia," he told her, "you've got this."

A crackling corona of magic rose from his skin and flooded up his arm to their conjoined hands…

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Zancrow the God Slayer felt it as the speed of his spin increased. He continued with his multi-tasking of trying to boil away the water around him and hold his breath though, not willing to stop fighting. Even if the water was replacing itself from the storm more quickly than he could summon flames to evaporate it the Mage doing this had to run out of power sometime. Then, when he got his hands on them…

His toothy, malevolent smile faltered when he realised just how fast he was spinning now. He had never known what it felt like to have his internal organs all stuck against one wall of his chest cavity, but he did now - the vortex was spinning so fast it had levelled out into a disc, dragging him into the centre.

Thinking his job had just become easier, since there was less distance between himself and the maelstrom's surface, he redoubled his efforts to escape. Black flames burned even when submerged as they tried to boil away their confinement. This, unfortunately, meant that Zancrow didn't see the massive rush of blue sparks that played out across the clouds overhead. He didn't see the flashes of light within the cloud increase - nor the woman's face form once more in the darkness and the snake-like protrusions of cloud reform, this time lit from within with power.

He did look up when the blue glow approached - and he was just in time to widen his eyes as several hours' worth of storm-grade electrical build-up discharged itself into the disc of water he was currently trapped within.

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A shock with a current of up to 0.2 Amperes can prove fatal to Earth humans. For an Earthland human, that ups to 0.3. For a Mage, a full Ampere. For Dragon Slayers and God Slayers (or the ones who don't eat electrons like other people eat sugar) that value can be anywhere between ten and fifteen Amperes.

Zancrow was hit with almost two-hundred million times that amount. Then the entire disc of water was superheated by the discharge and changed state in an instant, causing it to expand to more than forty times its volume in barely a few seconds. A bomb going off in his face would have been gentle by comparison.

When they eventually dug what remained of him out of ground, which took some doing considering the depth to which the remains had been propelled, the Rune Knights were shocked to discover a look of almost child-like awe on the God Slayer's ruined face. They had no idea that his last thought had been one of stupefied 'Holy shit that's awesome!'.

What they did know, was that they weren't going to be messing with the happy couple who had returned to Oak Town any time soon. Not when the attentive, demure young lady who had so carefully helped transport her battered compatriot away from the ruins of the village had struck down one of the continent's most powerful Dark Mages with the kind of wrath that brought Gods to mind.

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David Robinson was conspicuously absent from the 'Top Ten Mages You'd Want As Your Boyfriend' list come the next publication of Sorcerer Weekly. He was, however, number three on the 'Top Ten Mages We Wish Were Single' list.