"Listen up, you losers! Some of you may know me. Probably you know me as Deadpool, or The Merc With a Mouth, or possibly even that crazy killer dude. Maybe you think of me as That Hot Guy in Flattering Red and Black Spandex. But I am so much more than all that. I am the Breaker of the Fourth Wall! The Yellow Box Conversationalist! The Chimichanga Chower Champ! The Master of the Pitiful Bob! The Guy Who Once Held a Hot Dog Hostage! The One From Whom Yappy DOgs Quake in Fear! The Awesome! Amazing! Completely and Totally Insane!"