Chapter Seven: Displaced Goblins

The goblins were playing poker. The cards had red backs and were wrinkled, dirty, and stained, but they worked. Unfortunately, the poker "chips" were chickens, which wasn't working so well, especially since the chickens kept wandering off. Mort had been voted the chicken wrangler again. It was his job to collect any chickens that wandered off and bring them back.

"What this card again?" a goblin asked, holding up the King of Diamonds.

"That card 'Steve,' " the goblin across from him said in a very authoritative voice. "You put chicken in?"

The first goblin, Jeebo—he was skinny and tall for a goblin, with a long, pointy nose—eyed his last remaining chicken. He didn't know how it happened, but whenever he played poker against Wort, he always lost. After a moment, he scooted the chicken forward until it was in the center. There were three other chickens in the pot, all clucking with annoyance, and Mort stood nearby with a broom—just in case.

The other two goblins playing the game looked uncomfortable. One of them added a chicken, as well, while the other put his cards down and stuck a finger in his ear, wiggling it around. "Too rich for me," he said, indicating the stakes.

Wort stuck out a small, pink tongue as he considered his cards. Finally, he laid down his cards and said, triumphantly, "I have Brenda, Larry, Sally, 'Manda, and Burt. What you got?"

The other goblin only had three Steves, a Sally, and an Eric. Jeebo put down his cards: a Steve and three Brendas.

"I win!" Wort said, triumphantly.

"You do?" Jeebo asked, looking at Wort's cards more closely.

"Yeah, Burt automatic win, remember?" Wort said, pointing to the Jack of Diamonds.

"I don't remember that!" Jeebo said, stubbornly.

"It true, ask kingy." Since no one wanted to ask the Goblin King about poker, they grudgingly watched Wort collect his chickens.

One chicken pecked at his arm and Wort said, "Ow!" He looked at the steely glare the chicken was giving him and then pushed it towards Jeebo. "You can have this one back, Jeebo."

"You sure this poker?" the third goblin asked.

"Oh yeah. Definitely poker!" Wort assured.

The fourth goblin, the one who had folded, had gotten up to go across the throne room to the goblin pit where two goblins were tossing a red bouncy ball. Many goblins often spent time in the throne room when they were bored. It had everything they could need: a goblin pit, a stone floor that echoed their footsteps nicely, the throne itself which they could climb on whenever the Goblin King was away, and oftentimes there was a buffet table that lined one end of the room. Jareth had learned early on that well-fed goblins were less chaotic and trouble-making goblins.

Mort felt the slight vibration in the ground first and frowned. "Did you feel that?"

Jeebo looked up. "What?"

"Ground shake."

Wort shook his head. "I didn't feel nothin'."

"Ground definitely shake—there! Did it again! You didn't feel that?" Mort shifted from one foot to another, his large brown eyes looking very worried.

Slowly, goblins stopped what they were doing. Wort was one of the last to notice the tremors and by now they came every few seconds. The goblins frowned, looking at each other.

"King?" one asked, hopefully.

"No, King still gone. Besides, why shake castle?" another answered.

"Fireys?"

They all shuddered—including a few of the chickens—with the thought that the fireys had somehow gotten into the castle, en masse.

"No, castle shaking, not burning or breaking," replied another goblin.

"Fairies?"

Everyone made a pfft sounds at this. The notion that fairies had enough magic to shake a whole castle was silly.

"My head hurts!" Mort said, clutching his tiny head. "I can't think what's happening! Where's King?"

"Far away, too far for us."

There may have been more said, but suddenly the castle shook so hard that many of the goblins lost their footing, crying out as they fell. Others skipped along the floor, which seemed to dance underneath them, trying to keep their balance. They all looked at one another, their eyes wide with fear, and then in one surge they all ran for the doors.

The goblins thundered down the stairs, past the doorway that led into the Escher Room, down further stairs, past the bubble ballroom, down some more stairs, past the mirror room, and finally down one more flight and out the front door. The castle had been thundering and creaking and shaking the whole time. The goblins were just glad they'd made it outside and they pooled into the front garden, looking up at the castle, their mouths open.

One goblin's pot fell off his head, forgotten.

With a final, groaning crash, the top of a giant stalk—it faintly resembled a bean stalk—burst through the highest tower of the castle. The stalk seemed to have crashed through the whole castle. Growing out of windows were vines with leaves already budding. By the positioning of the stalk and some of the vines that came out of the large bay windows, the plant had grown right through the throne room; probably a good thing that they had all run away when they had.

After a few more minutes of stunned silence, the goblin bent and put the pot back on his head.

"How we gonna tell King about this?" Jeebo asked.

"Do we need to tell King? Let's just point and say, 'lookie,' " Wort said.

"Can't really miss plant," Jeebo agreed. Then he frowned, thoughtfully. "You think this King's doing? New castle makeover?"

Wort looked hopeful. "Maybe. King did weird things before. Like make that ballroom for Lady, even though he never use it afterwards."

"Or that staircase room where nothing goes anywhere," Mort said. "I hate that room!"

"Or the Bog…"

Goblins shuddered, then Jeebo said, "No, he make Bog for very specific reason."

"What we should do now?" Wort said.

None of the goblins had any answer. Wort looked around, suddenly remembering the poker game and his chickens. He cried out in frustration. The chickens had not followed them out; they were probably somewhere in the castle, lost and confused—including the ones he'd won.

"My chickens!" he moaned.

Jeebo held up the cards. "Wanna play again?"

Wort hesitated, then shrugged. "Yeah, but I dealer."


Author's Notes: Just a short chapter for you guys. I'm probably going to be busy the next few days -- I have deadlines -- so we'll see how my upload schedule goes. I did start another story, as well, and have the first chapter uploaded. It's very different from "The Clockwork Heart," but it still has the underlying romance -- because I'm a sucker for a good Jareth/Sarah story. :) And yes, I realize that this chapter didn't have either of them, but don't worry, the next one will...and quite a bit of plot exposition too (all -- or at least a lot -- will be revealed).

(Mr. Unnamed Bad Guy with Black Hair appears, standing in the shadows and looking all mysterious and evil and stuff)

Mr. Bad Guy: Like me?

CQ: Yup, like you. You'll finally get more than a handful of lines! And a name!

Mr. Bad Guy: *grumbles* About damn time.

The Fine Print: All I own in this story are my original characters.