He's like the wind

Disclaimer: I do not own Queer as Folk or any of the characters, they belong to Showtime and Cowlip.

Chapter 7: Never alone

We didn't talk about the kiss, but we hadn't stopped talking. In fact, it was like Brian was just ignoring that it had happened. I'm not sure how I feel about it, maybe he doesn't like me? But why would he kiss me if he didn't like me? It didn't make any sense. I suppose I could ask him about it, but I'm not that comfortable yet.

"Justin, honey..." my Mother began at the dinner table, I looked up to her. "Dear, you look very preoccupied." She said kindly.

I tried a small smile, "I'm fine." I assured her, there was no way I could tell my mother I was having mixed feelings about a man, and a lower class man at that.

My mother smiled and turned to the table. "I've been taking some dance lessons." She announced, and my head snapped up.

"With who?" I asked, for some reason I didn't want Brian giving my mother dance lessons, actually, I didn't want him giving anyone dance lessons.

"A woman named Daphne," she informed us, and I tried hard to conceal my sigh of relief.

"I've met her," I told my mother, "she's really great."

"She is." My mother agreed.

"Jen, you don't need dance lessons." My Father berated.

"Well, I want them." She answered, and my smile could have blinded them, finally, my Mother was beginning to stand up for herself, it was amusing watching my father scowl.

I glanced across the room and suddenly my humour left me and my breath got caught in my throat.

Brian.

He was walking across the restaurant with Daphne, holding her hand. They looked to be laughing, and Brian looked as beautiful as ever in a sharp suit. I seemed to be looking at Brian differently now, ever since that kiss, I felt more of an ache every time I glanced at him. In only a few days he had changed from my mystery Adonis into Brian Kinney, the man of my dreams.

"Oh, there they are now!" My Mother exclaimed, seeing the pair as well. "Daphne!" She called. Brian and Daphne looked over to the source of the noise. Daphne smiled in my Mother's direction and Brian's eyes locked with mine. He wasn't smiling his half-cocky, half-totally adorable smile, he was simply staring, piercing me with his gaze.

Before I could get my thought process back however, Brian and Daphne were walking towards my table. I blushed and looked down.

"Mrs. Taylor," Daphne greeted respectfully.

"Mr. Taylor." Brian greeted, angling his head towards me, I could hear the humour in his voice, it caused me to grin. That was one of the main things I loved about Brian. He obviously had no respect for class distinction or social hierarchy. A lot like me.

"You must be Brian Kinney," my Mother said warmly, directly at Brian. "My son says you've been giving him dance lessons."

Brian nodded softly. "Yes, Madam, your son is quite the talented dancer."

"He's lying," I said before I thought about it, "I have two left feet."

Daphne laughed and Brian tried to conceal a smirk. "That's not true, Mr. Taylor, it's really not."

I tried to conceal my frown, Mr. Taylor...that's what people called my father. I wanted Brian to call me Justin like he always did. Or call me by his name for me, I knew if it were just the two of us he would have said...

"That's not true, Sunshine. It's really not."

My Father then took that moment to introduce himself.

"Never saw much fun in dancing, myself." He said obnoxiously.

I dipped my head in embarrassment but Brian just smiled politely. "Each to their own." He said simply, "I always thought business people were rather boring as well."

Slam Dunk! I could swear I even saw my Mother contain a grin.

My Father's smile grew tight but he kept it all the same. "Professional dancers," he continued, blowing out his cheeks, "that's very impressive, I mean...for people of your social background."

Brian and Daphne kept their smiles, but I knew that look in Brian's eyes. It was the same look he had given Kellerman in the holiday club that night, when he had stopped smiling.

...

"Sunshine, are you alright?" Brian asked me, we'd just finished up our dance lesson and I was lingering in the dance hall. I looked up at his question, feeling quite touched at the concern in his eyes.

"Yes, I'm fine." I informed him, I swallowed down my nervousness and walked a bit closer to him. "Actually, I needed to talk to you..."

Brian sighed slightly and looked down, he didn't say anything for a few long moments until he eventually looked up to me. "If it's about that kiss...Sunshine, I can explain..."

I stopped in my tracks, surprised that he's brought it up "Actually, it wasn't." I informed him, that thought hadn't even crossed my mind.

"Oh," said Brian, looking down again. "What then?"

"Wait..." I said, "now that you mention it...what do you mean you can explain?"

Brian sighed and sat down on the floor, crossing his legs. He fiddled with belt-loop on his trousers for a long moment, almost like he was thinking about what to say. I stared at the beautiful concentrated facial expression for a long moment until I lowered myself down and sat crossed legged on the floor directly opposite him, when he looked up to me our eyes met.

"When I kissed you..." he began slowly, "well, that was never meant to happen." My heart wrenched for a moment until he continued. "Not that I didn't want it to happen," he continued, "hell, I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't want it to happen but..." he sighed and stared at the floor again. "Lower class people aren't meant to kiss middle class people."

I stared at him and my eyes softened. "Brian...?"

"That and I wasn't even 100% sure you were gay...and...I'm a dance instructor at a holiday park and you're the son of a wealthy business man, honestly, I figured you'd be disgusted."

My eyes widened in shock. "Brian, you could never disgust me. I'm in awe of you..." I tilted my head to the side. "I thought you knew me well enough to know that I don't care about class."

Brian did a half-smile. "Do you remember me telling you that you have to be perceptive when you're like me?"

I felt a tugging on my heart as I stared at this strong, untameable man. Trying to contemplate living your life not knowing who you can trust.

"You can trust me." I said immediately, not thinking. Brian looked at me and smiled. He simply stared at me for a while until he spoke.

"So, what did you want to talk about?"

Now it was my turn to speak. I didn't quite know how to say it...

"I'm sorry," I said finally, "about my Father, he was really rude to you and Daphne earlier."

Brian suddenly grinned at me. "It's no problem," he said, smiling. "Really, it's nothing. I'm used to it."

I frowned. "You shouldn't be used to it."

Brian simply shrugged. "I don't want you to feel like you have to apologise on behalf of your Dad. He said it, not you."

"I know..." I began, "I just...I guess I just don't like it..."

Brian cocked his head to one side as he stared at me. "It must be hard being middle class." He said, "I mean, if you don't like it."

I snorted. "Oh yeah, my life is so hard," I said sarcastically, "people like you and Daph, and Bobby, you're the sort of people that deserve the things I get."

"Our lives aren't so bad..." Brian began, "I mean...there not great but...you 'no, we're all alive and healthy, we can see the sunshine everyday..." he smirked at me, "I can definitely see the Sunshine every day."

I smiled in awe. "That's a great way to think," I said, "that's what I think sometimes as well."

Brian smiled slightly.

"So..." I began, "how did you become a dance instructor?"

Brian smirked slightly but shrugged. "A bunch of us were in a diner one day and..this guy came in and was holding auditions for dance instructors, and if you got in he taught you a bunch of dances and how to break them down and teach them..." he shrugged again and stared at me, "what about you?"

"I...err, I want to go into art." I said shyly, and Brian nodded.

"You're an artist." Brian said, "you're used to doing everything with your hands."

"You remember that?" I said, surprised. Brian simply smirked, half-cocky, half-totally adorable.

"I can pay attention when I want to, you 'no." He joked, causing me to smile.

"Do you...have a family?" I asked him, curious to know him.

Brian smirked a little, "Parents and a sister, but...I don't really speak to them much."

"Why not?" I asked.

"When I came out..."

"Oh," I said, "I'm sorry."

Brian laughed. "Don't be, you wouldn't be if you knew them. I moved out as soon as I turned eighteen."

I frowned. "On your own?" I asked softly.

"No, not on my own." He said, "I had Daph. Obviously . And my best friend Mikey, and his Mom...they were like a family to me, but ever since Daph and I had to go on the road with our performances we don't get to see them that often."

"We'll go and see them." I said without thinking, "you can introduce me."

Brian grinned slightly. "I'd like that. You're so much different from the rest of them."

"That's not necessarily a good thing," I explained.

"Why not?" Asked Brian, but I stared at the floor.

"You can tell me," he said softly, "you can trust me."

I stared at him and smiled softly. "I guess...it's just..." I looked into his eyes. "It's very lonely."

"You won't be alone forever." Brian assured me, and for some reason, I had trust in his words.

"You'll never be alone, Sunshine. Not anymore."

I smiled slightly. "Promise?"

Brian grinned and lent forward, before I knew it he had pressed his soft lips to mine in a pretty obvious answer.

In that moment, I knew my life would never be the same again.