Matter of Honour
Christine wondered why Raoul told her he wouldn't be able to see her the next day. They had had a wonderful day together, going for a walk and even having a picnic, they had laughed together and told each other how happy they were and sometimes they were just foolish like children, it was as if they were back in the happy days in their childhood. And then Raoul had said they wouldn't see each other for two days but he couldn't tell her why. It would have been enough that she knew and never forgot that he loved her.
At first she was suspicious that something was absolutely wrong, but then he smiled and told her she would understand in two days - the way he told her that caused her to think he was getting her a really lovely present and of course she would not spoil his fun and question him further.
She was not really concentrating on her performance that evening and it was a poor performance, she knew herself and already dreaded to read what the critics made of this. Her thoughts were somewhere else - with Raoul. So she was not surprised that Erik waited for her behind the mirror in her dressing room, as soon as she had locked the door he asked if he was allowed to come in.
"I know I've been dreadful," she sighed, "You don't need to berate me."
Erik was silent, which made her nervous. Usually he would start a long lecture what she could have done better.
"Erik?" she asked, noticing that he shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other and twisted his gloves in his hands nervously. He suddenly gave the impression of a shy young boy who wants desperately to ask a girl if she would like to play with him but does not dare speaking to her.
"If... if you are not..." he cleared his throat and began anew: "If you are not already invited for dinner tonight, may I ask... ask if you would... dine with me?" He couldn't help stuttering, he was far too nervous now.
She considered saying no, but she felt guilty after spending a day with Raoul. "Erik... you know that... Raoul and I..." she began.
He waived a hand. "Yes, you told me and I allowed you to play engagement. I won't go back on my word only because he did and canceled his voyage to the Antarctic. But..." His stance changed and he became submissive again. "...would you dine with me? Please?"
"I'm tired, Erik."
Erik knelt down before her and lifted his hands, but didn't touch her's. "Please. I won't keep you up late. Your room is ready for you, it is warm and... I made köttbullar for you."
Christine's eyes went wide. It was a traditional Swedish dish and Erik must have gone through great length to find an authentic recipe. "Well... it would be a shame to have to throw that away," she reluctantly agreed, "But I want to go to bed early and I want to leave whenever I want."
Erik jumped to his feet and clapped his hands and Christine was sure he would start dancing around every moment now. Sometimes it was so easy to make him happy and he had a habit of strongly expressing his happiness at least around her. "Of course! You are my guest, not my prisoner!" he promised. He would have promised anything now, for this was a critical point in his plan - he needed her to be with him or she could always decide to run to Raoul and ask him to run away with her for good if she learned of the duel. Only if she was with him she would not have that opportunity.
Christine noticed that Erik was even more nervous than usual. She was accustomed to him being at the verge of panic whenever he thought he might have done anything wrong - and even her shifting in her chair could cause him to ask anxiously what he could do to make her comfortable - but he was so obsessed with creating a nice evening for her, she felt like he had planned every of her moves so detailed that one step smaller than he had anticipated would set him off.
"Don't you want to eat something?" Christine asked, thinking it odd to have him acting like a slave at the dinner of a queen regent.
"Thank you, my dear, but no," he answered, then added in an attempt to make a joke: "Don't worry, it is not poisoned, I already had some of it and it is delicious. I bought a recipe book with Swedish cuisine, so I could always cook everything you like. And maybe you help me learning Swedish? I have some books, but learning a language from a book is like learning singing solely from books - absolutely impossible." He stopped himself before he would start to talk more to himself than to her. He had been alone for far too many years and started to talk to himself and sometimes he would just voice his thoughts which was rather disturbing to her for she never knew if he was talking to her or to himself. He would have to stop doing that.
Erik insisted that Christine would go to bed early, as she herself wished to do so. He had prepared her room, lit the fire in the chimney, decorated the room with flowers and placed a basket with everything a lady might need to be comfortable on the table, just to make sure. Christine wondered about the large supply of soaps, perfume, cosmetics. She didn't plan to stay more than one night, and this only because she didn't want to risk him going mad with fury again, so why had he bought that much? But she already knew that Erik had the habit to buy large supplies as if he was expecting a siege every day. He had told her that he had been in the Opera during the war and the Commune and that this was not easy. She wondered if he needed this large supply of everything he might possibly need eventually to feel better.
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h+tt+p+s+:+/+e+n+.+wiki+pedia+.+o+rg/+wiki/+Swedish_cuisine (delete the + to get the link)
