A/N: So yeah, updates are not being as frequent and regular as I would want them to be (sorry sorry sorry) but fortunately next Wednesday I will be back home and writing again!
Meanwhile, thanks for putting up with me.
Anyway, enjoy!
I Won't Say I'm In Love
"So, finally, did Arthur say yes?" Gilbert asked casually.
It was now lunch pause, and Francis and him were talking while the French ate and the other… well, inhaled the food.
Fuck, Franny does know how to make up for the fights…
"In fact, he did! Hopefully, everything will be settled for next week!" His eyes lit for a moment.
Agh, love…
"Does that mean that not only did I have to hear you fuck with him when we were roommates, but I will also have to hear you now that we're neighbors?"
"Will I have to hear you fuck with your boyfriend, Gil?" he said, wriggling his eyebrows suggestively.
Oh no. Not this again. Somehow, Francis… and Antonio, a bit too, had come to the conclusion that he and Matthew were… going out together? Fucking? Or some kind of relationship which involved love.
Which, he wanted to make this point clear, he did not feel and would never do.
Ever.
"He. Is. Not. My. Boyfriend!"
"…Yet." The other answered with a smirk.
Will it ever get through their thick skulls that I will never fall in love?
And why does everybody seem to have a crush on the word "yet"?
"What are you up to?"
Antonio came into view then, with that goofy smile he always wore after seeing, talking to, or even thinking about Lovino.
If I ever, ever behave this foolish over somebody, please shoot me.
"Not much, just trying to get Gil out of denial"
Not even a second later, they were both looking at Gilbert, grinning like madmen.
"I am not in denial… because there is nothing to deny! He's my roommate, my friend, and that's it!" he said, albeit a bit high-pitched to sound casual.
He saw Francis sigh, and Antonio put a hand on his shoulder. Oh, so they were going to put the 'we're disappointed, son' stunt on him. It lost its power on him the moment he started to memorize the scheme, and even some of the dialogs.
They should have been actors. They love drama too much.
"Gilbert?"
"What?"
They are trying to trick you… don't fall for anything. Keep alert. Keep alert.
But his friends were wearing the most innocent expression, and almost looked genuely exasperated when they said:
"Come on."
"Please"
"We know each other for… how long, Tonio?" the French asked, as if it was just curious.
But they all knew it was just an excuse for the other to answer:
"Enough time to know when you're lying"
Uh-oh. They're finishing each other's sentences. Lecture time incoming.
"Like that time when you said you were not jealous of your little brother for getting laid before you did" Antonio said.
Hey! I was not!
"I was not! He was just lucky!"
He was. Not everybody had someone pinning after them since Middle School, after all.
"Or when you said you didn't cry with Titanic" Francis finished.
And, for your information, he didn't cry. He didn't…
He was just allergic to sad moments, okay?
"I didn't" although it sounded false even to his own ears.
"For real, Gil? For real?"
Okay, he had to be honest to that.
"… Maybe I did. A bit"
Okay, they tricked you with this, don't fall again. This is the mock one, to make you feel like you've already confessed the worst and there is nothing else to fear! Keep alert. Keep alert!
"And anyway, how many times have you been in a relationship?" the spainard asked, only to quickly add "…And marrying a girl in recess in Middle School doesn't count"
And there went his only card in the game.
"Shit"
"That's it. I'm getting married and Franny here is living with his boyfriend... Hey! Kinda like you do! Hehehe"
Francis scolded him a bit, saying they were going off the topic… but it was far too easy.
I think I know where this is going…
Paternal tone. Keep alert. Don't let them put the paternal tone on you, the 'We know more than you do, kid?' Tone.
"Anyway, don't you think we know a bit more about relationships than you do?"
And theeeeeeere it went.
"No, you don't. Because you are all sappy, and 'I love you so much', and puking rainbows. Love is not getting all lovey-dovey but doing nothing. Love must be proved, not said"
"Yeah? So you think you would do better than us?"
He should have been suspicious to the Cheshire grin that came along with the sentence, but calling for his ego blinded him too much for his own good.
"Of course I would! First of all, I would call Matthew every chance I had. Like, now, for example, instead of wasting my time trying to convince my friend that he has unawesomely fallen in love. Next, I would watch hockey with him everyday, even if I have no idea what it is about. I would take care of him when he's sick, or depressed, instead of coming here like you guys do. I would…"
And he went on and on, wandering about how good of a boyfriend he would be to Matthew, nearly all of the things in the list being ones that he already did, completely ignoring the smirks that seemed permanently plastered on his friends' faces.
"Should we tell him already?"
"No, let him realize by himself…"
It still took him a couple of minutes. Then, something clicked in his mind, followed by a quick 'fuck!'
"Hey! I don't know how, but you tricked me into looking like I am already having a relationship with Birdie!"
He instantly covered his mouth. No, he didn't say that last word. Or, if he did, they didn't hear. Because then, well, if he had actually called the person he was so fervently denying was not his boyfriend by that teasing nickname that could so easily be misunderstood…
If he had wanted to prove a point…
And if his friends already had a smirk on their face, now it was so bright that he was afraid of getting sunburnt.
"Birdie?" they both asked at the same time.
"It is worse than I thought…"
"And I thought 'petit lapin' was sappy enough…"
And even if they tried to look disappointed, they still could not hide the devilish smirk that seemed plastered in their face. They were enjoying themselves, the bastards.
To future me: Next time, shut the fuck up.
"Awwww… look at him. He's blushing!"
He was not. He was not. His cheeks were just feeling hot because of… because of… because the office was hot.
It was January and snowing outside, but still, the office was hot.
"Am not" he tried to defend himself.
But they wouldn't fall for that.
"You are!" they said, in a sing-song voice.
And he had the strange feeling that the teasing had just begun…
"You know guys? Screw you! I'm calling Mattie"
It took him a second to fully understand what he had just said, and the effect it could have on the topic he was so fervently trying to deny. So he instantly added:
"TO CHECK ON HIM. BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS DO"
And he stormed out of the room, trying to maintain the little dignity he still had. Antonio and Francis watched him go, still incapable of containing their excitement.
Now that they were alone, Francis patted his friend on the back and said:
"Boy, you owe me some money…"
But Antonio was not one to admit defeat easily.
"Okay, double or nothing. I say Matthew's the one to take the first step, because even if he gets out of denial, which I sincerely doubt he would, he would still be too blunt to take the hint, and too much of a coward to confess."
"Still trying to save it, don't you? Will you ever surrender?"
"Never. I will go down with this ship"
They remained silent for a little while, until they heard the faint voice of their friend, talking on the phone.
"Yeah, in fact I have a meeting soon. But let's see if I can pass the buck to someone else and get home earlier."
And they smiled, much like parents seeing their small child's advances.
"You know, he's a fool" Francis said.
"Yeah, but he's our fool" Antonio added, and they both sighed.
"Since when are we in charge of his love life?"
"Since he obviously can't do it himself?"
"True that… Birdie"
They tried to be serious, but it was just too good. They burst out laughing.
"God, I'm gonna tease him with that until it stops being hilarious"
"It will never stop being hilarious"
"That's the point"
"Oh Birdie…" Francis sighed, batting his eyelashes.
They had the right to tease him about this. The guy had been making fun of them in all their relationships, saying 'that's so gay', although, well, it obviously was, and saying he was too awesome to put nicknames.
And then he went and called his roommate 'Birdie'
Come on.
"And he has the balls to call us sappy?"
"Sorry Bird…" He stopped himself, Antonio and Francis were by his side at the meeting room door, after all.
"Mattie," he corrected, and looked at his friends smugly. "I can't make it. I have to attend the meeting. I probably won't be there for dinner either."
"Well, don't worry. I will probably stay awake, so see you later." He heard the faint voice of his friend say. Something was a little bit off, though.
"Are you sure you are okay? I mean, I could always…"
He doesn't sound okay. He sounds… shier… than his usual shy. Which is still really shy, but not with me. Anyway, something's wrong. Should I fake something and go straight home?
"Do you wanna risk your job? Worse yet, do you wanna watch Pretty Woman?"
Uhh…. There, there. That was the fiery Matthew he knew. He was okay after all.
"Okay, okay. Let's calm down. I will stay, and I will work… are you sure?"
"See you, Gil."
"See you. Bye!" And he hung up, entering the meeting room and sitting in his chair.
"Oh, Mattie, my love, I can't be with you tonight" Francis mocked, still in that lovey-dovey tone that did not resemble Gilbert's when talking to Matthew.
"But I can't eat, I can't sleep if you aren't there with meeeee…" Antonio continued, in a high-pitched attempt at a Soap Opera voice.
"I'll be there soon, my love" But they couldn't keep the stunt for long. They had to burst out laughing out loud.
Oh fuck, they don't get tired of this, do they?
"Will you please shut up? Do I parody your relationships?" Gilbert asked, whispering. He had enough with those two, there was no need of the whole office knowing.
"Sooo… you admit it is a relationship"
What did I tell you about shutting the fuck up, Gil? For the future me: trust my brain more.
"IT IS NOT!"
"It was you who said that, not me"
"I didn't! Stop playing with my mind!"
"Listen Gil… you had the time of your life teasing us when we were in denial with our respective boyfriends. Now it's our turn"
"And we will enjoy every second of it"
Worst part? He was sure of it.
"And just for you to know, even if Antonio lives on the other side of the city… I don't"
They were neighbors. And friends. And co-workers. There was no escape.
I shouldn't have laughed so much when he met Arthur… or I should have teased him double, just to pay for this.
"Hey! That's not fair!" Antonio complained.
Well, at least I have one less person to worry about…
"Don't worry, I will call you if anything gets interesting…"
And Gilbert was sure he would. Because they were best friends, and best friends seemed not to have any respect for the other's privacy.
"Please do. I already have a few jokes up my sleeve… and I think Lovi would be really happy to know 'Potato Bastard #2' is now even more of a lovesick fool than I am…"
They were clearly having the time of their lives. And honestly, Gilbert would too, if the joke wasn't on him.
So, the only thing he could do was to move to the opposite side of the meeting table and sulk in the corner, all the while plotting his little revenge.
"If only this would last forever…" Francis sighed…
Then the meeting started, and their boss came into view, so Gilbert had to content himself with mouthing them a big 'fuck you' from across the table, and start pretending to be paying attention to the presentation.
They are not right. I do not, by any means, have any kind of feelings towards Matthew except for friendship.
I do not want him to be any more than my friend, and my roommate. Because if I did, which I don't, that would mean that I am in love. And I am not.
I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love. I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love. I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love. I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love.
Gilbert came home late, but he was still on time for dinner. So he thought he might as well order something, to make up for it. And, so, he opened the door, juggling between the keys, the Thai food, and the dog that was now running under his legs.
"Hey Birdie! I'm home, and I brought…"
And, what his eyes met was the most adorable, cute and angelic vision he had ever seen.
Matthew was on the couch, sleeping peacefully. He still had his glasses on, and the TV was still running, so he must have fallen asleep while watching one of the movies his brother had rented. His chest went up and down evenly, and his cheeks were a bit pink. He… even… was… smiling… in…his… sleep… and Gilbert couldn't… no, he couldn't resist…
I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not…
And so, he left the food on the table and searched for a blanket, because that's what friends would do.
Finally finding one, he came back to the living room and approached him quietly, not to wake him up. He wrapped the other's body in the blanket gently, only to find Gilbird nested around the blond hair.
Okay, so maybe regular roommates wouldn't take that much care. But that's what good roommates would do.
Except him. Because, had it been Antonio or Francis, he would have taken the drums out. Or, haha… he still remembered that time when Francis passed out after a party night, and they wrote all over his back.
It took him a whole month to discover why everybody smirked at him and told him that, indeed, they wanted to have a good time, asked if it wasn't a bit too expensive, and if the banana costume was also included in the price.
College…
He took the glasses off Matthew, trying not to wake him up, folded them and put them on the table. All the while trying not to… seriously trying not to…
But he just couldn't help it.
A kiss on Matthew's forehead.
Just a little peck. Just for a second. Just because he looked really cute.
No big deal. That didn't mean anything, much less that he was in love.
I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love. I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love. I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love. I am not in love. Love is stupid. Love makes people stupid, and as I am not stupid, I am not in love.
I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not in love. I am not…
Awwwwwwww… fuck.
…
…
…
I am not in love… am I?
A/N: What a pair of hopeless fools.
Anyway, this plot is finally going places. Although, if I follow my first scheme, we have still a loooooong way to go.
Song from the movie Hercules.
Review!
