Disclaimer: I. DO. NOT. OWN. NAR.U.TO. Obviously.
Mind, Body, and Spirit
Chapter Seven
"Sakura," said a voice that was way too low to be Tsunade's.
It couldn't be… could it? Kakashi?
It was. She knew it was. Sakura did not need to open her eyes to reveal the answer to her question. It was just too blatantly obvious. Could I possibly be hallucinating? No way. I saw his feet right there not too far from me. Next to Tsuande's. He is here. In this room with me.
Kakashi and Tsunade were the only ones in this private room with the pink-haired patient. Oh, how ironic was it that she was the patient! Sakura couldn't help but find the situation funny, but in a horrible, twisted version of funny. She almost felt like laughing, but in a bitter tone, of course.
Sakura was relieved that her two saviors were there, but still, she felt humiliated. There was no courage in her to actually make eye contact with the two persons. If it was flipped around, and one of her friends were in her current condition and felt embarrassed, Sakura would put a hand on his or her shoulder tell them, "Things happen to the best of us. Don't be ashamed. There's no reason for you to be." Then she would smile at them and make them feel a world better… She should be telling this to herself, taking her own advice. But no. Sakura was being a hypocrite and was not following her own morals. She felt like there was a reason to be ashamed. Sakura thought that the person to blame for letting this happen to her is herself. She is to blame because she was too weak to fight against Itachi. Sakura was ashamed of herself for not being strong enough… Even if she told herself not to be ashamed and that what happened could have happened to anyone, she would not fell any better. Sakura needed someone else to tell her those special words… if someone told her, then maybe she would believe…maybe.
Tsunade mumbled something incoherent to Kakashi. Sakura honestly had no idea what the Hokage told him, but the next thing Sakura knew Kakashi was making his way over to her. Sakura could feel herself unconsciously inching away from him, closer to the bed. Why is he coming toward me? Sakura's eyes, still only focusing on the floor, watched as Kakashi's feet came closer and closer until they were right in front of her. Sakura squeezed her eyes shut and waited in agony. Her heart racing, body sweating, mind racing, breath short and intermittent… Sakura had no enjoyment in these few seconds of torture as she waited for Kakashi to do something. Oh my God. He's crouching down. Sakura could sense the silver-haired man crouching down and getting closer to her. Why is he…?
Then Sakura felt hands on her body and she was slowly and steadily being picked up off the floor by Kakashi. He held her gently in the form of bridal-style. His hands that her on her arms were warm, especially when compared to Sakura's cold and numb body. It sent a hot sensation through her body and Sakura opened her eyes. She looked up at Kakashi's face, which was looking straight ahead focusing on what was before him. He looked so determined. He always does. Sakura couldn't help but admire that trait of him. He doesn't let one problem bring him down. Kakashi, when faced with a challenge, prevails. Always. I used to be like that… what happened to me?
As Sakura was placed onto the stiff hospital bed, she slowly slipped back into her depressive mood. All she seemed to do lately is berate herself. Sakura could not even remember the last time she gave herself a compliment or a congratulations. But she needed to stop thinking about these things. The important thing right at this moment was getting out of the current nightmare. She would deal with her self-esteem and her many other problems later.
Kakashi now stood on the left side of the bed, and Tsuande walked over to the other side and sat on the wooden stool beside the bed. There was no escaping it. Either way she looked, Sakura would have to deal with what she had been dreading. They purposely went on both sides of me… figures. Sakura sighed and arranged her pillows so she could be in a sitting position on her bed. Once she was situated, Tsunade finally spoke.
"Sakura, it would be a stupid question to ask how you are, but physically, you are fine. I know you're tired, but if you rest for a couple days, you'll be fine. Now, mentally, you may be damaged. I can't justify whether or not your mind is okay. Tests were done to see if there was any brain damage and luckily there wasn't. But only you can tell if there is really something wrong. So if anything happens, tell me. I've already spoken to a psychiatrist–"
"A what!"
"–about you and it is your decision whether or not you wish to partake in the sessions with the doctor.
Does she honestly think that I am so pathetic that I need another doctor's help! Ridiculous! I will never go to a shrink! Never!
"And also, Sakura, I am suspending you from the hospital until I feel you are up to it, and–"
"What!"
"Sakura, I don't think your outbursts are helping any," said Kakashi so calmly.
Sakura stared at him and then she looked to her mentor. How can she do that to me… To me, not working at the hospital would be like… the world ending. The hospital is my life. It's what makes me, me.
"Lady Tsunade, please, you can't… the hospital…"
"Will survive without you."
"But…" Frustrated tears started forming in Sakura's eyes, but she refused to let them fall because if she did, it would only prove how weak she was. Then she felt a hand on her shoulder. Sakura nearly jumped and she looked up to the owner. Kakashi. Why is he being so nice to me…
Kakashi understood. He understood how hard this would be for her. The hospital is her home away from home. Her comfort place. And without it, Sakura probably felt lost. Like she had no place to go. Kakashi knew what it felt like to lose something like that. Sakura needed a friend. And right now, he was the only one fit for the job for several reasons. First of all, he was the only one, beside Tsunade, that knew about what happened to Sakura, and two, Kakashi knew that Sakura trusted him. Their trust in each other ran deeper than teammates or simple friends. A trust that takes a lifetime to develop.
"And, I don't want you doing any strenuous activities until I say so, which would include training," added in the Hokage.
In a soft and almost too calm voice, Sakura said, "So basically you want me to be an invalid until you say it is alright for me to live a normal life again?"
Tsunade was slightly disturbed by the way her student said what she said. The words were spoken in such an emotionless tone but between the lines, malice could be secretly found. After recovering from her minor shock, Tsunade said, "Yes. When you put it like that…"
Sakura just stared intently at the wall that was straight ahead on the other side of the room. The blank expression on her face never flickered. Tsunade continued her speech, "Sakura, you can go home any time you want. Just stay in bed though. I'm sure you will be more comfortable in your own bed." Tsunade got up from the stool and said, "Well that's it. That's all I have to say. I'm busy and have work to do. If you have any questions about what happened since you've been out, ask Kakashi. He can probably answer most, if not all, of your questions."
"Um, lady Tsunade," asked Sakura and Tsunade turned her head, "Can I leave now? I would like to go home immediately."
Tsunade raised an eyebrow. But agreed. "Fine, but Kakashi will escort you home, and I will be having ANBU patrol your house's area. Oh. And, Sakura, Naruto and Sasuke have been asking about you. It is up to you if you want to tell them. I understand and support whatever your decision may be. Good bye." And with that, the Hokage opened the door and left the quiet room.
Sakura's gaze drifted down to the too-clean sheets of the hospital bed. She had to many problems going on at once… She really just wanted to go home.
The walk home was a long journey. Because Sakura could not walk at a normal pace, Kakashi was forced to walk even slower than his usual lazy, laid-back speed. Though he did not mind helping a friend if all he had to do was walk slowly. Also, the walk consisted of no conversation. Sakura was in no mood to talk and Kakashi was not going to disturb the woman's thoughts that she seemed to be seriously pondering over, given the concentrated look on her face.
"We're here," Sakura said. Kakashi was surprised to hear her voice. She really did sound depressed. If he were in her situation, how would he feel? He really had no idea.
Sakura started walking up the few steps that led to her front door with dragging feet. Kakashi watched her take out her keys and put them into the lock. All of her movements were slow, languid, and depressing to watch. She needed a boost in her once-fiery spirit. Kakashi felt like getting his one good-deed-of-the-day done and over with so he yelled out to the konichi, "Sakura, hold up."
Sakura had already managed to open her door when Kakashi called out for her. "Hm?" She responded. The silver-haired jounin sprinted his way up to her and said, "Are you going to take Tsunade's offer of the psychiatrist?" Sakura did not respond or even look at the man before her. If she said no, she knew that Kakashi would only try to convince her to accept the stupid offer, even though they both knew that Kakashi himself would never take help from a shrink.
After receiving no reply from his female friend, Kakashi, with a warm hand on her shoulder and in a caring tone, said, "Sakura, don't worry. This could have happened to anyone, you were unfortunately the victim. Don't be ashamed, okay? It'll all work out. Believe me." He smiled down at her and playfully ruffled her pink hair. Sakura stared at Kakashi with shining green eyes. "Come find me when you want your questions answered. You need to go to sleep." Then Kakashi made his leave, already exhausted and ready to sleep even though it was still daytime.
Sakura watched her former sensei leave and she couldn't believe it. She couldn't believe it because she believed it. She believed Kakashi. Just by telling her those special words that she needed to hear, she managed to summon some hope. Just a little. Which was a little more than what she had before. "Thank you, Kakashi." Even though he could not hear her thanks, Sakura still felt it was necessary to say. Tears were running down her face, but it was okay. She felt better that she cried because everything will be okay. It'll all work out…
Sakura entered her dark house and didn't bother turning on the lights. She quickly, well, as quickly as she could go, went to her room and landed on her bed. The pink-haired konoichi fell asleep right away.
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Authoress's Note: I changed the 'author' to 'authoress' because, guess what? I'm a girl! The amount of reviews last chapter was amazing once again! Thanks to everyone who reviewed and/or added the story to their favorites/alerts list! Okay, here's some news. I discontinued my old story "People Change Too," which is (was) a KakaSaku fanfic, but I lost interest. So if anyone, ANYONE, is interested in continuing the story and making it their own, then PLEASE go ahead. Just contact me first before you start writing, okay? Thanks!
