Author's Note:I'm so sorry it took me forever to update this story, guys! In my defense, I've never abandoned the story. The reason it took so long to make was because I was unhappy with my results. You guys have no idea how frustrating this chapter was to write. I rewrote it like 50 million times and every time I write it then it ends in a different way. I have so many different ideas that I'm conflicting myself. But I'm ultimately glad with the way it ended here.
Peyton Sawyer is her name. She's skinny, curly blonde, and she's my partner for the in-class English assignment. I recognize her from pictures in Nathan's room. She's his confidante and on most days of the week she's his girlfriend. He didn't talk about her much during the last week or so that we've been hanging out but he said enough so that she isn't a complete stranger to me.
"Jake, right?" she said in an introductive manner as she scooted her desk over to mines.
"Yeah. And you're…?" I pretended as if I didn't know her. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have been to pleased at knowing that Nathan speaks about her sometimes.
"Peyton."
"Ah, Peyton." I said as I snapped my fingers, pretending like her name was at the tip of my tongue.
Peyton glared at me with a half-smirk and half-intimidating glare. I started to pretend as if I didn't know why she was doing that but I'm pretty sure she could tell that I was acting. I'm not very good at pretending.
"What?" I asked as innocently as possible as her eyes fixated themselves on me.
"You mean to tell me that your new best friend – Nathan – never said a word about me?"
Busted! I couldn't really say anything. All I could do is laugh it off and ignore the question. I shouldn't be too surprised if she asks me again. I've noticed that this whole 'ignore the question' tactic has been very unsuccessful as of late.
"I'm gonna take this awkward silence as a 'yes'." Peyton answered for me.
I just laughed in defeat and looked down at the work I've done so far. It should come as no surprise that my paper was empty. I have no idea where my thoughts were wandering lately but I can shamelessly say they haven't been under control. I think that I think about stuff so much that when I try to think about what I'm thinking about I go blank. Oh crap! Now I'm thinking about thinking?
"Are you okay?" I managed to hear Peyton ask while I try to get a grip of myself.
"Yeah…" I lied unconvincingly. "Why?"
"You look like you're having a freaking migraine mixed with a heart attack over there."
I just shook my head and inhaled a silent breath. I was hoping she hadn't noticed my attempt at subtle breathing.
"And now you're kind of breathing a little weird."
I couldn't help but laugh. I'm realizing that Peyton Sawyer is very an observant blonde. It's only fair that I return the favor by giving her a friendly analyzing. The very first thing I noticed was that her roots weren't blonde. Secondly, I noticed that a pencil is steady in her hand and her English notebook is wide open but there's no classwork on her paper.
"So, what do you draw?" I asked her in my most casual tone.
She tilted her head a bit in a razzled manner. She quickly shook her expression off and went back into her half-broody, half-deadpan expression. She slouched into her a chair a little and flipped the pages in her book. As she quickly skimmed through her pages I noticed a few cartoons from the newspaper. She threw the book at me and gave a cocky smirk.
"I draw anything," she answered my question that I nearly forgotten I've asked. "But most times, I just draw what I see."
I could practically feel my chin continuously clapping the floor as I looked down at her sketch. It was a still. The setting took place in the halls of this school. I could see the detail in almost every locker. Every familiar dent, scratch, and banner that stood out in a specific area of the hall was drawn in perfect detail. The kids all walked past the hall like it was a blur. All except one kid. He was considerably average height. His hair was short with a hint of curls. He stood awkwardly in the middle of all the students and watched them with a wide gaze.
"Is that…?" I couldn't finish the question because I was still kind of shocked.
"Yeah. That's you." She answered me with a lopsided beam directed towards me.
"Why did you draw me?" I asked with a very big emphasis on "me". I mean, I'm not really that interesting. I obsessively listen to country music for god's sake.
Peyton shrugged at the question. "I don't know," she replied with an overdramatic drawn-out pout. "I see you down the halls, mostly alone, and I see you look around the school…" she paused. "It looks like you're… looking for answers to life or something." I couldn't say a word. I gazed at her with narrow eyes and open mouth. "Or maybe not." She blurted out embarrassingly.
"No. You're not wrong. You're not wrong at all." I gave her a smile.
Peyton dropped her head a little bit after smiling sheepishly at me and I noticed how she continuously gave me quick glances while her head was down. I can already tell there was more that she was contemplating on talking about or asking me. Her relationship with Nathan is pretty unstable; it'll be no shocker if she wanted to hear his point-of-view from a friend of his.
"What is it?" I asked her under a friendly chuckle.
"I can tell…" she paused dramatically. "I can tell that you like someone."
Damn! I'm hoping that the throat lump that I just swallowed wasn't too obvious because apparently Peyton can read me like a book.
"Who are you talking about?" I asked, trying to play it cool as if I have no idea what she talking about when on the inside I'm like panicking like a sunuvabitch right now. "I don't like anyone."
Peyton shrugged. "Maybe I'm wrong. I'm just calling it how I see it."
"And what do you see?" I asked like an idiot. I should have just let her drop it right there.
"I see how you look at…" she leaned in closer to me and gave me a whisper. "Lucas Scott."
Oh. My. Fucking. God.
BUSTED!
Okay, I have two options right now. One: Laugh it off and pretend like she's damn crazy. Hell, from the stories Nathan tell me she very well could be. Or two: Just tell her the truth and beg her to keep it a secret.
"Don't worry. It'll be our little secret." She assured me, breaking my thoughts. "I, personally, think you should give it a shot."
I couldn't hold in my sarcastic 'as-if' laugh. Telling Lucas that I'm kind of gay is one thing but telling him I have a school girl crush on him is pushing my luck. I'd rather do the smart thing and keep my mouth shut… or something to that affect.
The school bell finally rung and I'd've thought I would want nothing more than to grab my bag and get the hell out of Tree Hill but that's not how I feel at all. I'm actually relieved that someone… anyone, knows my secret. It's been eating me up for long time and now I can talk about it to someone other than myself.
As I walked down the hall, side-by-side with Peyton, we met Lucas and Nathan near their lockers. Peyton playfully wrapped her arms around the back of Nathan's neck. I collided fists with both Lucas and Nathan and then gave Peyton a smile.
"I see you two have gotten to know each other." Nathan observed.
"Yup. And he told me everything you said about me!" Peyton joked.
I assured him she was joking by shaking my head but he laughed it off before glancing over at me. I guess he already knew I was joking. Peyton walked a little closer to Nathan and poked him playfully. He gave her a smile and then wrapped his arms around her before they walked down the hall to class. Lucas stood there still scrambling inside his locker.
I contemplated walking off and I guess Lucas could see it in the back-and-forth step show I just did.
"Where are you going?" he asked as he filled his backpack with a couple of books. "I thought we had English Literature together?"
"I'm not walking off," I lied. "I'm waiting for you."
"Early bird." The blonde labeled me with a snorting laugh.
"Bookworm." I retorted with a mocking laugh.
Is it just me or does our nicknames imply some sort of sexual innuendo? You know, they always say the early bird gets the worm…
[Ring Ring]
We were nearly a few baby steps away from class and then his phone just rings. Timing once again proves to dislike me.
"Hey mom, what's up?" He said as the phone went up to his ear.
I started stomping my feet a little impatiently and exchanged an impatient gaze with him as he glanced up at me. He looked back down and held the phone closer to his ear like he was at a party and couldn't hear a word.
"Mom. Stop." His voice is cracking and his serious face became so much more serious. "You're not making any sense!" he shouted into the phone.
"Luke?" I called to his attention.
I extended my hand and gripped the lace of his mom's café hoody. It was a reflex and I never gave a thought as to why I did it but I felt like it was necessary. It was.
"Keith…"
That was the last word he said before his knees collapsed on the hallway tile and his eyes set off into a mindless gaze at the fluorescent lighting that lit the halls. I know what just happened. I don't want to say it out loud, just in case I'm wrong, but I know it. I probably don't know the full details but I know that…
"Lucas?" I called as I knelt before him. "Luke…" What the hell was I going to say? 'I'm sorry'? What should I do? What can I do?
As I try my best to get my stupid thoughts together I feel the weight of the world fall on my shoulders.
Lucas is sobbing.
I can feel his sobbing movements on my shoulders and I can feel the onslaught of tears soaking through the cotton of my coat and onto my shoulder blade. I can feel Lucas's hands lifelessly resting in my lap like birds to its nest. I can feel his spine tingle in concurrent of his howling as my arms wrap themselves around him. I can feel my chin settling perfectly into his shoulder as his do mine.
But most of all I can feel him.
A/N: Okay, I think that I definitely took this story to a new aspect. I definitely won't ignore or deny the development I've added between Jake and Lucas just now. In a way, with this chapter, I feel like the story is only just beginning.
You guys have no idea how glad I am to finally finish this chapter and be glad with my end result. I've written this chapter so many times that I've lost count at this point. There were a lot of different alternates to this chapter. Some of which were pretty filler-ish and others just brought out the big picture much too quick (one attempt even had a sex scene – of whom I won't share the two participants).
Anyway, with this chapter I think it's definitely turned into a big Nathan/Jake/Lucas triangle and to be honest, I'm not making any promises on who is endgame. I just know that the triangle isn't so much in subtext anymore. And while these 7 chapters have been about Jake and his feelings for Lucas, I still think Jake and Nathan's relationship is the most important aspect of the story (and I promise to make that fact more evident in future chapters).
