Sickening Battles
Half an hour after breakfast, the team took a break. They weren't getting anywhere. Abby needed to finish her tests, and Commander and Mrs. McDonald had yet to show up. Ducky was waiting to do the autopsy until they saw their son once more.
Gibbs came back to the area where the bull pen had been. The area was replaced with the NCIS work out room. Ziva was warming up with a punching bag, and Tony and McGee were stretching.
"DiNozzo, up," Gibbs ordered as he stepped into the ring.
"Don't you want to stretch first, Boss?" Gibbs looked over at his subordinate. "You already stretched. Alright!" Tony tossed his boss a pair of gloves, then put some on himself.
"McGee, you coming?"
"Weh – I thought it was one-on-one…" McGee stuttered.
"And now it'll be one-on-one-on-one. Get in here, Probie!" Tony called. McGee sighed, but grabbed gloves anyway.
"Hold on!" Abby shouted, coming out of her lab. "I need McGee!"
McGee looked over at Gibbs. "Go, McGee." The junior agent didn't hesitate. He threw off his gloves and followed Abby into her lab.
Gibbs and Tony began throwing punches and deflecting them. Ziva had enough of the punching bag and watched the fight, waiting for her turn.
"Officer David," a voice said from the side, "suit up!"
Ziva turned to look at the Director. She'd changed out of her suit into clothes much better suited for exercising. "Think you can still fight, Director?"
"Put on gloves and boots and we'll see!" Jenny said as she put on padded shoes.
Ziva did as she was requested. Jenny had finished before her.
"You have not lost your touch, Director!" Ziva said as she blocked a kick a short while into the fight.
"Of course I haven't! Just because I'm not in the field on a regular basis doesn't mean I forgot how to throw a punch, despite what Gibbs says!"
"Challenging me, Jen?" Gibbs was fighting Tony, but he was still Gibbs. He could do anything and pay complete attention to something else going on across the room.
"Only if you're up for it!"
Gibbs brought Tony down with a kick to the back of the knee.
"Ow…" Tony groaned from the floor.
Ziva and the Director were a pretty fair match. After a few more minutes, they called truce. Gibbs was already on the floor and had put on padded shoes to match his gloves.
Tony and Ziva retreated to a wall where they discovered that Professor McGonagall was in the room.
"Professor," Ziva greeted. "How long have you been here?"
"Long enough!" McGonagall replied. "What are you doing?" She sounded shocked and maybe even a little disturbed.
"We're fighting, Professor. Being able to is a part of our job!" Tony explained. "Oh… this is going to be better than Jackie Chan vs. Mr. Miyagi!"
"Mr. Miyagi is from 'Karate Kid', yes?"
"Very good, Ziva David! I guess that movie class did teach you something!"
Ziva punched Tony's arm.
"Would you quit distracting me? They're about to start!" Tony blindly batted Ziva's hand away. "Ten bucks on Gibbs!"
"Very well. I bet ten on the Director," Ziva answered. They shook hands.
"What's the point in knowing how to do this? It seems… violent." McGonagall winced as Jenny twisted Gibbs' arm behind his back. He kicked his leg back and moved it in such away that it caught the back of Jenny's leg and she tripped, letting go.
"Our jobs are violent. What is it you think we do, Professor? Yeah, we sit at desks until we figure out who done it, but then we have to go get the person. People don't tend to react kindly when you tell them they're going to prison," Tony said without taking his eyes off the fight.
"Sometimes we are put on protection detail. The people we are assigned to protect are often Navy and Marine officials. Many people do not like them. We keep them from being harmed," Ziva elaborated.
"Or we protect families from people trying to kill them. Kate and I almost got blown up doing that once. Some crazy chick down the street."
"Who is this 'Kate' person you keep mentioning?" McGonagall tried to keep her focus off the fight.
"Agent Caitlin Todd, formerly a Secret Service agent, protecting the President. After that, she became Special Agent Katelyn Todd of NCIS. Ziva took her spot two years later," Tony said shortly.
"Why did she leave?"
"She didn't leave on her own will, Professor," Tony finally turned away from the fight briefly to look at the teacher. "Agent Todd was shot in the head by a sniper on the job." He turned away again.
Professor McGonagall felt sick again. She hoped the regular occurrence of such a thing would end soon. Those hopes were thrown to the ground once Officer David started speaking again.
"Our jobs are not safe ones, Professor. I have almost been killed three times here. Once in a shootout, Tony was there, and twice doing under cover work. Again, Tony was there for one of them. There were several other times at Mossad. Tony has also been framed for murder and attacked by a Marine on steroids."
"Don't forget the time I got the plague and the time my car was blown up!" Tony added.
McGonagall began wishing she'd just stayed in her classroom for the time she had off.
"But wait, there's more!" Tony continued. He still had his eyes glued to the fight. "Gibbs almost had his neck snapped in half by a suspect once, was punched in the face and almost shot by another, and has barely survived an explosion set up by a crazy terrorist. Put him in a coma."
"The Director has been kidnapped and held hostage before," Ziva put in. She also did not spare a look at the professor.
"McGee hasn't had any edge of death experiences yet, but he has had a crazy fan of his books go through his trash and use the thrown out material as grounds for murder, and his sister was almost raped, but the convict exchanged that for a frame-up, instead," Tony listed.
"Not even Abby and Ducky have safe occupations. Abby has almost been killed in her lab with gas-laced evidence, almost been killed by her stalker, almost been killed by her lab assistant –"
"That's the guy that tried to frame me!"
" - , and almost shot by the same crazy fan of McGee's," Ziva wrapped up her thought.
"Before Ziva came Ducky was almost drained of all his blood, chopped up into itty-bitty pieces, and then shipped back to us in a barrel," Tony said. "And I think that covers everyone, doesn't it, Ziva?"
"Agent Todd, me, you, Gibbs, Jenny, McGee, Abby, and Ducky. We missed Jimmy."
"Oh, yeah! Palmer was almost shot by a suspect finishing his cleaning up. Later that week, Palmer totaled his car by crashing into the guy. That covers everyone."
Professor McGonagall decided not to risk opening her mouth. She was absolutely disgusted. Certainly, lives had been endangered, but she hadn't imagined such brutal and outlandish methods.
"Since we're apparently losing energy, Gibbs, do you care to place stakes? Get motivation back up?" Jenny gasped.
"You name yours first!" Gibbs requested, aiming a kick towards Jenny's gut.
She twisted to avoid the kick before speaking again, "I win, I help on the case."
"I win, you stay in your office and do your job, and let me do mine!"
"Fair." Jenny copied Gibbs' previous move and sent her foot racing towards his stomach.
Gibbs caught Jenny's leg and pulled. She landed on her back, knocking the wind out of her. Gibbs quickly placed a knee on her chest, wrapped one hand around the back of her head until he could get his fingers around her jaw, and the other hand on the side of her face. "66 pounds of torque, twist, snap." He stood up and started walking away. "Enjoy your office. I'm hitting the showers."
"Pay up, Zee-vah!" Tony said joyously, holding his hand out in front of the Israeli.
Jenny pushed herself onto her elbows and watched the exchange of money take place. She raised an eyebrow at Tony.
"Uhh…" Tony said awkwardly. "It's a consolation prize for you, Director."
"DiNozzo," Jenny wheezed, stopping his progression towards her, "go shower."
"On it, Director!" He took off towards the doorway that had appeared when Gibbs left.
Ziva walked over towards Jenny and extended a hand. The Director took it and allowed herself to be pulled up.
"Do not look at me like that, Jenny! I bet on you!" Ziva defended herself. Jenny rolled her eyes and led the way to the showers. McGonagall was left in the large area by herself. She conjured a chair and sat down in it heavily.
Doors slid open and a pale faced, black haired woman stuck her head out and looked around before pulling the rest of her body out of her lab. "Come on, Timmy!"
"Abby, seriously, I'm sure you can shoot just fine!" McGee said exasperatedly, following the scientist out.
"Anyone can figure out how to pull a trigger, but I don't have the right stance, McGee! You never know when that can come in handy. Or do I need to remind you of your crazy obsessed fans again?"
McGee sighed. "Alright, fine." He pulled the gun out of its holster on his hip, made sure the safety was on, and handed it to Abby. "Show me your stance."
Abby jumped into the air and landed with one foot in front of the other, gun poised at the wall across her.
"That's pretty good, Abby! What do you need my help for?"
"I lied," she admitted. "Ziva taught me stance. Teach me how to aim!"
"Abby!" McGee exclaimed, "No!"
"Awe, come on, Tim! Why not?"
"Because that involves actually shooting and Gibbs is around here somewhere and he's liable to sneak up behind me and beat the crap out of me for letting you have my gun!" McGee replied in one breath.
"Gibbs just finished an epic battle with the Director. He's in the shower. He won't here a thing! Come on, show me!"
"Abby, why don't you just ask Gibbs to show you how to aim when he comes out?"
"Because Gibbs is going to tell me to get back to work!"
"And I haven't?"
"I can manipulate you easier. That and you understand the concept of 'things take time' far better than Gibbs."
McGee grabbed the gun from Abby's hands, put it back in the holster and threw his hands up, "I'm not doing it!" He turned around and went back into the lab.
"Tonight, while you sleep," Abby snarled, following McGee.
"What are you going to do, huh?"
"Pick a chemical, any chemical. I will find a way to kill you with it and not leave a single shred of evidence!"
The doors slid shut, cutting off McGee's response from the professor who felt her sanity draining.
Professor McGonagall thoroughly enjoyed the next ten minutes of silence before Gibbs re-entered the bull pen that had reclaimed its spot outside the morgue and lab. Thankfully, he kept up the silence, though his presence alone was irritating the professor.
"DiNozzo, you bring that towel near me and I will kill you!" Ziva said as she backed out of the shower room in clean clothes, her hair down her back in a braid.
Tony came out of the showers as well in a fresh suit, a wet rolled towel in one hand, and a crazed look on his face. "With what and how many possible ways?"
"I will kill you with my thumb, Tony!" she declared, holding it up for effect.
Tony's eyes popped and he looked more interested. "Really? That's an interesting trick. Tell me about it, I've always wondered how it's done."
"I am about to demonstrate it on you!"
Tony raised the arm that had the towel at the end, but before he could flick it at his partner, the Director came up from behind and snatched it out of his hand. "Irritating though you are, Agent DiNozzo, I'd like to keep you around for a bit longer." She threw the towel to the side and the floor swallowed it before she headed off towards the stairs leading to her office.
"Well that's quite a different attitude from last night when you were about to let Ziva tear my brain out through my nose, Director!"
"Women are allowed to have mood swings, DiNozzo," she replied without looking at him and continued her ascent up the stairs.
The entrance to the Room of Requirement suddenly burst open and the boys Jenny recognized to be Harry Potter and his friend Ron Weasley tumbled in.
"Potter! Weasley! What do you think you're doing?!" McGonagall snapped, rising from her seat to tower over them.
"She told us she wanted to talk to them!" Ron wheezed, waving his hand at the agents and doubling over.
"Lavender is threatening to jump of a ledge on the fourth floor, Professor!" Harry explained, placing his hands on his knees, trying to regain his breath.
"Tony, get McGee from Abby's. Ziva, grab your gear. Let's go," Gibbs commanded harshly.
Tony was gone and back in less than thirty seconds with the junior agent and both of them grabbed their backpacks, badges, and guns.
"Lead the way," Gibbs told the boys. They took off running. "Jen, come on," Gibbs said, sounding very much like he didn't want to say it.
Jenny hurried down the stairs, taking off her heels as she went, and met Gibbs at the door. They ran to catch up with everyone else.
Ducky had noticed the commotion and come out of his morgue. Abby had exited her lab with McGee. She looked over at the doctor.
"I really do hope I don't need a second table," he sighed.
Professor McGonagall backed out of the room before anything else was said and hurried off, following the sound of fourteen running feet across the halls.
Next chapter - Another Piece to the Puzzle
I can't think of anything witty to say... a very rare moment, indeed.
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