A/N: 5 reviews on that last chapter! Thank you so much to all of you!
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Caesar had shouted after me but I kept walking. I didn't run, just maintained my deliberate pace. Only when I was past the apes and their watching eyes, past the end of the bridge, past the blast debris and blood splatters, did I speed up. The jog did nothing to calm the raging storm of thoughts inside me. Ever since Caesar had agreed I could stay, pieces of various plans had been swirling around, trying to slot themselves together. Wrecking the supplies in the city and the message on the bridge had only been the start, but the return of people who'd been living here before threatened a far bigger idea.
I didn't try and follow them south. No doubt they were way ahead of me and I was sure Caesar would have sent some apes to do a reconnaissance mission anyway. In reality, I was just running to get away. Away from everyone else. Away from myself.
Without any idea of where I was, I came to a stop and sank down onto the sidewalk, breathing hard. Once more, I pulled the picture of Caesar and Will out of my pocket, but it wasn't the ape that my eyes focused on. I had never felt like I'd sided with the apes for the sake of Will's memory before, but now questions were swirling, possibilities I'd never considered before coming to nag at me. Had I failed him already? The first bullets of a war had been fired.
Something white fluttered to the ground and I reached out on instinct, catching it before it could blow away. Another piece of paper, folded in half. I frowned, opening it out.
I realised what it was just before I saw my name in terse letters on the front of the envelope. The message, if it could be called that, which Denny had left for me before I'd gone up to the woods. Was he one of the ones who'd charged the bridge? My hand clenched at the thought, crushing the paper between my fingers, deepening the creases that would never come out.
My gaze drifted and I drifted with it, watching leaves tumble down the street without really seeing them. The quiet was too precious to disturb, but eventually, numb and hungry, I sighed and looked around. The sun was high now, quickly burning off the mist. Time to go slinking back, and see what the apes had learnt. I hesitated for only a second before shoving both pieces of paper back into my pocket together. Heaving myself back to my feet, I began to wander slowly back towards the ape's stronghold.
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Caesar's councils were somehow always both quieter and louder than I expected. The apes watching would hoot their support or anger, but the one speaking didn't have to shout over the top of them to be heard. Maybe Blue Eyes was right; maybe sign was better. Caesar still liked to let the noise die down before giving his contributions. It gave the others more of a chance to get in front of him but also seemed to give his own opinions more gravitas. Or maybe he just liked to be dramatic.
Slipping in halfway through a loud chorus of hooting, I had no trouble making my quiet way along the wall to a window that had been broken and boarded over, sliding onto the sill and pulling my feet up beside me. It took a supreme amount of effort to focus my eyes on the rapidly moving hands in the inner circle, but there was very little point. I had learnt most of the basic necessary orders, and other random words I was picking up over time, but without Blue Eyes to translate the strings of signs, I was lost in seconds. Of course, it was better for him to participating, rather than pandering to my inability to...
Frowning, I scanned the circle again. Blue Eyes wasn't there. I knew one heart-stopping moment of fear. There had been bodies on the bridge. Surely he wasn't... I looked to Caesar and shrugged the thought away. He wouldn't be this calm if his son had been killed. So where was Blue Eyes now?
"How many?" Caesar's words brought my head back up, and I watched Rocket sign back, spreading his two hands apart. Lots? Many? I didn't think it indicated a small amount. There were more signs afterwards, but none I could recognise or infer any meaning from.
Caesar grunted slightly, his eyes wandering and somehow finding me. I glanced away for a moment before returning his gaze, watching him beckon to me. I hesitated. It was only the memory of begging him to allow me to stay, of blabbering about all the ways I could help, that made me stand up and pick my way forwards, wondering what was wrong with me as I did so. Caesar had given me a way out, a place where I didn't have to be alone. The humans hadn't been an option, and he'd given me a different one. I'd promised to help as much as I could in return. Why was I feeling so apathetic now? What would happen when helping turned from giving advice and information, or trying to communicate from atop a bridge, to turning a gun on my own species?
I nearly stumbled at that thought. Was I not past the idea of 'us' and 'them' yet? I was firmly responsible for most of this whole mess, including the deaths of countless souls. Was I about to baulk at a few more, or was I just too much of a coward to do it directly?
Crouching down beside Maurice, I glanced up, finding a pair of eyes staring right at me. It wasn't one of the ones in the circle, but an ape on the outside of it, watching from the front of the ring of onlookers. I recognised him as one of Koba's followers. Blinking, I looked away first, meeting Caesar's gaze.
"Beach, just past the zoo. Next to a lake," he said. I glanced away, trying to remember the coastline. It was amazing how quickly I'd forgotten maps, and though I'd looked over several in the past few days, the details eluded me.
Maybe it's because you wouldn't be able to deny that you were a murderer then. I nearly growled in frustration. The topic just wouldn't leave me alone. The zoo, I tried to bring myself back on topic. I knew the zoo, had been there in the madness just after the outbreak, and a lake... there was a lake nearby. A collection of several lakes...
I nodded, the memories coming back. "Lake Merced," I said. "The ship can't have landed there though, right? It's still at sea?"
All eyes turned towards one of the apes further to my left, who nodded and signed quickly.
"Small boats, bring men to beach," Caesar said.
"What's the terrain like?"
Again the other ape signed, and I looked to Caesar as he finished, wondering again where Blue Eyes was.
"Flatter than here," Caesar said.
I nodded slowly. "The ship will be covering them with their guns then. Are the others there, the ones who attacked the south of the bridge?"
The ape nodded. I closed my eyes briefly. It was an effort not to curse.
"They'll be wringing them for every bit of information they've got," I said, glancing up at Caesar. "You should move. Straight away."
Caesar nodded. "Females already moving," he grunted.
"You should send the mothers and young back to the woods," I said bluntly.
He frowned. "The rest?"
I raised an eyebrow. "There are still more guns."
There were hoots of protest as they realised what I meant, and Caesar gave a sniff of disapproval as he turned away.
"Caesar, they're here," I said. "They. Are. Here. And they know way more about fighting than you or me. The numbers could make a difference."
He huffed again but didn't say anything.
I held back a sigh. "I'll have another look at the maps, but I think there are two roads in. Might be able to surprise them from the south."
Caesar nodded, then signed to the others, who gave rumbles of agreement and broke apart. I paused, letting them move away, and doing my best to ignore the continued gaze of Koba's ex-ally. Giving Caesar one last glance, I stood up and walked out. At least I had something to do now, and I knew where to start.
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I was only three streets away when I came across the females and young, moving steadily across the city with huge gorillas flanking them on all sides, guns looking like toys in their grip. The high hoot was the first warning I got and I looked right in time to see Cornelius jump down from his mother and come scampering over to me.
"Hello, Munchkin," I said, smiling despite myself as he climbed quickly up to my shoulder. "What's going on?"
To my surprise, he signed back, one hand jumping back and forth beside my ear. With a small laugh, I turned my head to look, but he'd stopped, calling to his mother whilst tugging on my long hair. I caught up with her quickly, falling into the procession under the watchful eyes of the gorillas, and many curious stares from the other youngsters.
Cornelia repeated her son's sign, and he hooted excitedly, mirroring it back to her.
"Move," she said, and I nodded as Cornelius swung down to my elbow then back up again.
"Moving. Exciting, huh?" I smiled at his renewed hoots, though inside my heart was breaking. How long would it be before he realised this wasn't some big adventure to an exciting new place? What would it take, to burn that innocence out of him? I wished we wouldn't find out.
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A/N: A bit of down time, but we've gotta vary the pace. Sorry it took a while to post, I've only just managed to finish writing chapter 10. Uni is insanely busy, and I just don't have the time to write that I used to. However, I am really excited for the next few chapters, so they may come a little faster. Please review and let me know what you think.
I'm also looking for some new stuff to read, so if you have any recommendations, I'd love to hear them! A couple of things; if it's PotAs, the new adaptations only pls, but other fandoms are also welcome. If I'm familiar with it, I'll give it a read. Also, no self-promos please. I want to know what you've enjoyed reading, not what you want more hits on. Thanks!
