EPOV


All I knew was that I had met him, "the one for me," and that he had used and left me like a cheap whore. My world broke and I didn't even have the strength to cry. I wanted to sink into the dark night.

Jasper's reaction was incomprehensible. As soon as we both reached our releases, his attitude shifted. Even if he took care of me afterward by cleaning up his semen on my torso, every gesture he had made was cold-hearted.

At first it pissed me off that he could feel so detached about what happened, but when he left me in my bed without any real promises of coming back, it made my heart sore. One of the most intense experiences of my life was tainted by the possibility of uniqueness. Jasper wasn't coming back. His failed attempt to spare my feelings in reassuring his soon return was in vain. My mind was already impermeable to any kind of deliverance.

The more the night crept up on me, the more my thoughts were perverse. I started to replay every move I made, every mistake that he could interpret like revolt or defiance. I knew I misbehaved by replying when he didn't tell me I could talk. Plus I was always so greedy and eager when we kissed. It was hard to repress my burning desire. I thought I had done well but apparently I was mistaken.

I let my own corrupted thoughts infiltrate my mind. They adulterated my perception and left me doubtful about Jasper. I had been selfish refusing to bottom for him. I didn't want to find myself in this position, I was afraid of giving myself completely to someone. I only thought of my pleasure not his. How could I have been so stupid? I should have put my fear and doubt aside and bottom for him. I should have trusted him. Wasn't it my role to do anything to satisfy my Master's needs?

I was incapable of fulfilling his desire. I thought that bottoming would be uncomfortable for me, that it would remind me of my past experience and that it would hurt me. I had never thought about him, what he would want or lust after. At the moment, I just panicked and silently prayed that he let me top. No wonder he ran away. I couldn't even be a good sub for him. I wasn't able to give him all of myself. It didn't take long for Jasper to realize I was less than nothing and that I didn't deserve him.

With a pathetic esteem of myself, I slowly drifted to a restless sleep where my dream transcribed the reality well. Jasper kept running away from me. I called, screamed, pleaded, begged, basically chased him all around Paris but he never looked back. He didn't even glance at me, he ran as away from me as he could.

When I awoke sweaty and short of breath, I realized the aurora was approaching. I decided that it would be better to start my day.

While I took my much needed shower, letting the water rinse away all my shame, my mind tried desperately to find out a solution to get Jasper back. I couldn't let shame and remorse cloud my relationship with my Master. I had to talk to him, to apologize for my behavior. He couldn't make me discover this new tempted world and abandon me like that.

What if he didn't want me? What if he saw me as a lost cause? Maybe last night wasn't as good for him as it was for me. Could I survive his rejection? Could I go back to a "normal" sex life? I quickly put those thoughts away, not wanting them to drag me down.

I finished my shower and dressed in casual clothes since I didn't have to be at work for at least three hours. Entering my kitchen, I saw our untouched dinner. My breath got caught, surprised that I forgot about dinner. Visions of last night crushed me. Jasper was kissing me, thrusting his hips against mine, licking and caressing my legs; Jasper shoving his cock in my mouth and fucking it. With him, I was where I belonged, I was whole.

I couldn't face those memories. It hurt to think how it ended and the loneliness and distress I endured when he left. I put the food in the sink and turned to prepare coffee.

I grabbed my phone and went to my balcony to get some fresh air.

After an internal debate to choose whether to call or text, I voted for a voice mail. If I called at this early hour, I was practically sure I would end up on the voice mail.

I took my time, get my cup of coffee and sat on the couch thinking about what to say.

Thirty minutes and three cups of coffee later, I decided that it was better to improvise. I knew the main subject but I didn't want it to sound like a prepared speech.

I dialed his number and anxiously put the cell phone against my ear. It didn't even ring.

"Bonjour, vous êtes sur le répondeur de Jasper Whitlock. Veuillez laisser un message après le bip, merci." Hearing him speak French was unexpected. It was weird because he didn't have any accent when he spoke English or French.

"Hi, this is Edward… from last night." There was a few seconds where my mind just blanked. "I… I wanted to apologize for my behavior yesterday. I wanted to serve you and make you feel good but this is all so new to me. I'm sorry for everything I've done. Can you please forgive me? I promise that for now on I would do anything you want and I won't displease you again. Please call me back, I'm so sorry." The last phrase was said in a barely whisper. I was so ashamed that he didn't like our night together.

I didn't move for a half an hour hopelessly waiting for him to call me back. When I came back to my senses, it was 7 AM. I changed my clothes and headed to work. I arrived and immersed myself into my work until lunch time. James entered into my office without even knocking.

"Hey, man! Do you want to come and grab some lunch together?" He already threw himself on my couch, comfortably waiting for my answer.

"No thanks. I think I'm going to keep working. I'm not really hungry." I tried to concentrate on my computer to prove my point.

"Come on, I haven't seen you since the night at La flèche D'or. What happen to you? You just vanished before the show even started. Is this because of Alice and me?" I sighed heavily. I really didn't want to have this conversation.

"No, it's not. I'm really happy for you guys. It's just that I wished I hadn't been caught in the middle." Sincerity was always better than a weak lie, even if it was a part of the truth.

"I know, I'm sorry but seeing you with her released all those feelings I had for her. I didn't want to lose her." This was so not the time to have a conversation about love and feeling right now.

"By the way, did you see the report that Nathalie made about the new linear particle accelerator from CLINAC? It had some good points. What did you think of it?" It was a lame diversion but it kept us talking for forty-five minutes. Thankfully, he didn't try to talk about relationship any more.

Sadly as soon as he exited the room, my thoughts drifted back to that night at La flèche d'or. It was first time I had seen Jasper. Despite my drunken state, I remembered perfectly the feeling of safety I had when he held and touched me. I felt at home. He had such warm-hearted and living gestures. He was bringing me to a life that I didn't know existed. The moment I regained consciousness and saw his beautiful expressive blue eyes, it was the end of the world as I knew it. It was him, what I always looked for, Jasper. I couldn't be separated from him now that I knew he existed. There was a constant void in me when he wasn't here.

Before I met him, I thought I knew what happiness was, but with him every emotion was duplicated and raw. Therefore, I wasn't just happy, I was ecstatic and blissful. Unfortunately, when I was sad, I didn't just shred a few tears, I was devastated and apathetic to everything. I kept living what people called life but I was lethargic. Everything seemed drab and insipid without Jasper.

This lugubriosity and constant sadness was present days and nights.

Thankfully, everything changed about two weeks after our night together. I was at work when my phone buzzed in my pants pocket. I quickly grabbed it and surprisingly saw Jasper was calling me. I ran to my office and answered promptly, leaning against the door.

"Hello, Jasper?" I was short of breath and tried to control it by taking long, profound breath.

"Hi, Edward. I got your message and I own you a little explanation." His voice was steady and direct, empty of feeling.

"I'm at work right now. Do you want us to go talk somewhere? Or we could meet at my place? I can take a couple hours off. Or tonight if you prefer." I sounded a little too excited by his calling. Play it cool, don't scare him away!

"I would rather discuss it now, if that is alright with you." He was in full Master Jasper mode. I tried to hide my disappointment.

"No problem. Give me just a minute."

I rested my phone on my desk. It didn't sound good. What did he want to talk about? Why was he so firm and distant? Didn't we agree to be boyfriends too? Maybe he called to tell that he didn't want to see me again. That would explain why he didn't want to see me face to face. Was the end of a romantic relationship, the end of our BDSM relationship too? Could I say survive not seeing him again? No matter what, I had to calm myself.

I locked my office's door and sat in my leather chair. I focused on breathing normally and put on the hands-free kit. Do not hang up the phone without fighting for us, but don't say anything stupid!

"I'm here."

"Edward, listen I own you an apology for what happened. I had no right to treat you like I did, it wasn't your fault. I can't be in a relationship with you. I think we should stop seeing each other." I audibly gasped, my voice refused to come out. "I am not a good Master and I am certainly not a good boyfriend." There was a long moment where none of us talked.

"I can't let you go," I said in a whisper. In response, he just sighed.

"If you wish to pursue this kind of relationship, I can find you another Master that will take good care of you." He was in business mode, like if I was just looking for a job. "I think Carlisle has connection with the Parisian crowd, he might help you… I didn't talk to him since… he will help me if I asked…" He started rambling, talking to himself. "He can recommend you," He concluded.

Once the meaning of his word sank into my blank mind, I let out a firm "no".

"How could you think I want anyone else other than you? I'm so sorry that I misbehaved. I promise I'm never going to act like that again. Please forgive me, please. Let me be a good sub. I'm yours and I have been since the second I saw you on the street. Please don't leave me. I don't want to go back. Please, Master." I was desperate, I didn't want to be alone again. If I couldn't have him as my boyfriend, I would have him as my Master.

He paused for an increasingly long time. I could hear the ragging storm of his thought through his shaking breathe. My heart beat was impossibly quick and my palms were soaking with sweat.

Finally, he ended my agony and he added, "Meet me in your room at precisely eight o'clock. I want you naked on your knees in the middle of the room. Don't forget to unlock the front door." As soon as he pronounced those words, I felt like I was on a cloud. He wanted to be with me, maybe not in loving way but he wanted me to be a part of his life. He was my Master. I couldn't believe he was giving me a second chance. I made myself promise that I would never disappoint him again. He was too good for me. He introduced me to this whole unknown world and decided to be with me along the road. I couldn't repress the goofy smile that appeared on my face.

Jasper's whisper took me out of my dream. "You didn't do anything to deceive me. You were perfect. You are perfect. It was me. I am damaged and there is nothing you can do about that. I'm sorry that I can't give you my love." I didn't have time to reply, he had already hang up.

What was he talking about "damaged"? He seemed physically fine, he was probably talking about his life. Maybe he had a rough past, but who hasn't? At 26, I have never been in a serious relationship, I didn't know the meaning of love. I lived in so many countries but I didn't find my home. I had nobody in my life, I was damaged.

How could he consider himself damaged? He didn't do anything that proved that he was but I couldn't be sure. I wasn't able to look in his eyes the only time we were intimate. He established the only rule that could bother me. Not being able to look at him in the eye at any time, was a really torture. Eye contact was the perfect way to create a connexion between us. For me, it was the only way to convey all the feeling I had when we were so intimate that words couldn't transcribe our emotions.

Even if he blamed himself for what happened that night, I knew I didn't act like I should have. I was going to show him that I was ready for him, for us to be together in any way he wanted to. I was lucky that someone like him was into me. After tonight, he would be proud to call me his sub. As for the lovers part, of course I still wanted it but I forbid myself to even think about it. If this was what Jasper wanted, I would willingly comply. He seemed to have low self esteem but he was perfect for me. I had to prove him that he wasn't damaged, that he deserved to be loved and cherish.


After five long hours, I finally was out of work and headed to my apartment. I was so excited about tonight that I wasted no time and ran. Once I was in, I undressed rapidly and climbed in the shower. I took my time to relax under the hot spray and thought about Jasper's phone call. He was giving me a second chance. I couldn't believe it. I had to be perfect tonight, I didn't want us to be apart for such a long time again. I had to prepare myself. If he wanted to fuck me, I wouldn't refuse him this pleasure.

Just thinking about him the promises of tonight's event made me semi-hard. I poured some shower gel in my hand and fisted my shaft. I started a slow rhythm and let my fantasies invade my body. I was on all fours in the middle of a room. My legs were wide spread. Jasper slapped and caressed every part of my body making my skin really sensitive. I was on fire. He came behind me and started to lick the base of my thighs where it drove me crazy. He continued to heat up my body by dragging the point of his tongue above my anus and on my perineum. I was continuously moaning and hard as a rock.

My left hand grabbed my balls and leisurely massaged them. My other hand was pumping my cock rapidly now. I was felt my orgasm built up. Thinking of Jasper, I slid my left hand lower and started stimulating the region around my anus. After a few minutes, I gently entered a fingertip in and out. I audibly gasped but resumed the movement. Once my muscles were relaxed, I thrust the entire finger in. The sensation was incredible. My orgasm was at bay. If I continued the movement, I would come and Jasper would be disappointed. I gathered all my willingness and cried at the feeling of lost when I stopped all of my administrations. I wanted to be ready for Jasper, my Master. Plus, he clearly specified that my orgasm belonged to him. I didn't want to taint our reunion by being punished.

I finished my shower, grabbed a towel and went to my bedroom. I was still hard but didn't care. Jasper would be here in an hour and I would have some sort of release with him. At least, I hoped.

I put on a pair of boxers and a t-shirt and decided that I should clean the apartment before he arrived.

I was finished changing the sheets of the bed when I heard the door opening. I quickly took off my boxers and t-shirt and fell to my knees on the floor. I bowed my head and joined my hands behind my back.

When he entered the room, I held my breath, afraid for no apparent reason that I had done something wrong. He closed the distance between us and his bare feet came into view. He slowly caressed my hair and without realizing it, I leaned in his touch and hummed.

"I missed you, Edward," he whispered in a tender voice. "Stand up and look at me, I want to see your face." He broke our contact and rested his hand along his body. I instantly missed it.

After the initial shock, I compelled my trembling limbs to cooperate. Jasper was the same size than me but he was definitely more in shape than me. Our eyes met and I forced myself not to bring our lips together and prove him how much I missed him.

We looked into each others eyes for a few delicious minutes. Jasper looked at me with so many emotions. The lust he conveyed through his stare nearly make my knees gave up. Mixed with his desire, I also found sorrow and anguish. It broke my heart, he didn't deserve all this pain. He was an angel, my angel.

I almost broke my position and took him in my arms. I wanted to protect him from those bad thoughts. Thankfully, before I had time to act, he resumed his soft brush in my hair.

This gesture revealed all my growing love. I couldn't understand why he was so gentle when two weeks ago, he was leaving me alone in my bed without any cuddling. It was probably Master Jasper who did those things but why did it feel like there was something more between us? Something deeper that a Dom/sub relationship?

I had to stop thinking about wanting more. Jasper certainly didn't want more. I was happy of his presence, so I had to let go of my stupid lover fantasies and focus on being a good sub to my Master.

"Edward, from now on, I promise that I will not abandon you. We will see each other at least two times a week." His hand slid to my neck and his finger drew small circles at the nape. "We are going to start your training. You showed me that you have a good control on your body but this is not enough." I was trembling, our bodies were only inches apart.

"I am going to make you feel like you've never felt before," he murmured in my ear. "By the end of the night, you will beg me to stop and let you rest. Do not disappoint me." My breathing became erratic and I thought he liked it because he whispered, "I am going to make you come… and come… and come until your pleasure becomes unbearable." His tongue traced a path between my collarbone and my ear lobe. I screamed from the unexpected movement before I let out a gasp realizing what I had just done.

"It's ok, I want you to vocalize your desire. You have no idea how hard it make me." I breathed out heavily knowing that I didn't misbehave. "Before we started, I have to ask about your past experiences. Has there been anyone else since we've been apart?"

I was sure my face registered the shock I resented. How could he think that? Didn't he see how hard I was? And he hadn't really touched me yet! To emphasize my point, I looked straight in his eyes and I vehemently shook my hand.

"Good, you can answer me when I ask you a question. Have you ever been in this situation before, with another man? And if so, were you a top or a bottom?"

My face was blushing under his stare. I was well aware of my nakedness and the fact that my cock was lightly touching his jeans. I broke our eyes connection and bowed my head.

"I have been in several one-night stands with men and I was almost always on top." I didn't recognize my voice, my nervousness made it so shaky. A part of me felt ashamed of those lame experiences. If I had known, I wouldn't have wasted so much time and energy with other people.

"Don't be embarrassed, everyone has a past. That is what brings us together now." I heard an indescribable emotion in his voice. There was several second where neither of us talked. We were both lost in our thought. "When you let those men fuck you, how was it?"

I thought my face couldn't get redder. I couldn't talk with him about that. It wasn't a pleasant experience and I didn't like remembering it.

Seeing my non-response, he fisted his hand in my hair and gave a timidly tug. He forced our eyes to cross. "Do not forget who you are speaking with! When I ask you a question, I want a swift, truthful answer." His tone was firm but his stare was field with lust.

"I'm sorry, Master." His hold in my hair relaxed and he started kneading my scalp. "Being this way with a man didn't feel good; the pleasure brought by the act in itself didn't erase the initial excruciating pain. I always ended up being ashamed to let them do this to me." My voice was a whisper, weak and irregular. I couldn't believe what I just confessed to him. I had never talked to anyone about this.

While still caressing my hair with his left hand, he sweetly rested his right one on my cheek. It was a lovers touch and this kind of action gave me hope for a future together. I closed my eyes and let my mind go to a forbidden world. Jasper and I were living together, we had this routine every morning, a quick fuck, a long shower and coffee on the balcony. We were like every other couple, watching TV in each other arms, cooking dinner together, walking hand in hand in Paris' streets. I loved him and he loved me back.

As nice as this fantasy was, I had to let it go. Jasper would never give me this. I didn't want to base our current relationship on false hope of a future romantic relationship. Plus, I was satisfied with the life he was going to give me.

Jasper broke my daydream with his wonderful voice. "We are going to create new memories together. I promise I will never hurt you." His breathing assaulted my thought, we were too close. My dick was touching his clothed thigh and it was nearly impossible not to rub myself against it.

"Edward, you are so beautiful. You have no idea how hard I am for you. Undressed me." His voice was suave and it went directly to my cock which twitched forcefully.

I wasted no time and started to unbutton his black shirt. Every time I opened a button, I kissed the revealed part of his torso. Once I reached the last button, I trailed my tongue all the way to the top of his jeans. By then, he was breathing loudly and both of his hands gripped my messy hair. Standing up, I pushed his shirt on his shoulders and along his arms, making sure that my fingertips slowly caressed his skin.

I couldn't help myself, I bent and press my lips against his nipples, just for a few seconds. I kissed his side and licked my way down his hip. I sucked on his flesh and placed myself in front of his covered cock. He didn't lie, he was hard as a rock. My mouth instantly watered in anticipation. I lightly palmed him and was reward by the most exquisite moan I had ever heard.

"What you are doing now is nothing compared to the teasing you are going to endure, later," He said in pure lust.

I replied by lowering his fly with my teeth, staring right in his eyes. A shiver ran through his body. I groaned when I discovered that he went commando. Fucking tease.

I placed my hand on his ass and slowly took down his jeans. When I reached his calves, I bent down and kissed his feet and toes one by one. After Jasper stepped out of his jeans, I finished my worship and resumed my place on my knees. I was right in front of his long, thick, erect dick.

Everything in him was so beautiful. I slowed down my breathing and admired the sight. The head was covered with precum and pointed to the ceiling. It was amazing the effect I had on him. I tested him by blowing out along his shaft. His reaction didn't disappoint me, he hissed and a small drop of cum fell down along his erect member which twitched beautifully. I closed my eyes and simply moaned. The pleasure of being able to interact with someone so angelic was immense.

"On your feet!"

I stand up, wondering why he didn't ask me to please him.

He guided me to my window. One wall of my bedroom had a large bay window with on each side long blueberry curtains. It was direct me against the window and spread my legs wide open. In spite of the cold feeling of the window pressed against my dick, I was still crazily hard. I tried to move my hips to get any friction but I suddenly received a spank.

"Don't move. If I wanted you to come, I would have done this." He pressed his full body against my back and fisted one hand in my hair and the other on my dick. He started a slow rhythm and brought my head back.

"Do you feel what you do to me?" He simultaneously thrust his cock between my ass cheeks and licked my neck. I couldn't vocalize an answer so I just moaned and nodded. My heart was going to stop at any second, I couldn't breathe and my body trembled with Jasper's slow pumps on my dick.

"I do not want you to come yet." He released my cock and placed his hands on my hips. He began a slow movement of his hips which resulted in his shaft brushing my anus.

This was something new for me, nobody ever touched me like this before. The feeling was mind blowing. My hands were pressed on the window. Looking over my shoulder, I watched him rub himself against me. I could feel my orgasm starting. I took deeper breathing to delay the explosion.

"You feel me behind you? I could just shift my direction and my dick would be buried in your ass." He picked up his pace and slapped my ass. "Do you like that, sweetheart?" I loved it when he called me my pet name. I hummed in appreciation. "Do you want to come?" Another humming. "Beg me!"

"Please, can I come, Master? Please let me come. You make me feel so good… This is so new to me. Nobody has ever touched me like you do." He was driving madly against me. "Only you… Please… Please let me." I should have felt shame to beg like that, to be at a point where I would do anything if I could come. With him, there was no shame, no judgement, just pleasure.

He grabbed my dick again and stroked me in pace with his wild thrust. "You are so beautiful, come for me, love."

Everything was reunited to make me orgasm, Jasper's dick against my ass, his hands stroking me and his sweet words softly murmured in my ear. I came with an unexpected force against the window. My mind went blank; I was completely disconnected to the world.

A couple of minutes later, Jasper was still trying to extract the remnants of my pleasure. His cock was still rocking hard against my ass, so I tried to push against him to meet his thrust. In response, he released me and grabbed my hips. He was increasing his speed against me and I was soon getting hard again.

Once I was fully erected, he slowed down his pace. I whimpered. Why did he stop? I was with him again, we could come together this time. I was frustrated and he eased the tension in my back with a massage.

"How do you feel?" He asked breathless.

"I'm better than ok, please don't stop." His pace slowly grew. "So good… more… please…"

He chuckled a little. I turned my head and was met by the most beautiful smile I had ever seen. It wasn't just his mouth but his whole face that lit up. It warmed my lonely heart that I could make him feel so free. We were in such intimate position, I had never felt closer to anyone before. He lie against my back and kissed me.

Like every kiss he gave me, there was no rush, no hurry. It was light, full of tenderness and hopefully love. During our kiss, he had never ceased the movement of his hips and the combination was driving me crazy.

Without even thinking, I started to take the control of the kissing and roughly shove my tongue in his mouth.

It didn't take him long to stop everything and took a few steps away from me. I didn't dare moving or even thinking. Minutes passed and we both stayed still.

"Why did you do this? Do you realize that you could have wasted everything? You have to control yourself. When we are together, I am the one in control. Is this so hard for you to understand?" He didn't sound angry but his disappointment was clear.

"No, it's not... argh… Maybe a little... It's just that sometimes I'm overwhelmed by you. You are so intimidating, I cannot believe that you would want me, even if this is just for sex. The only way I know to prove people I exist is by provoking them. Taking control is safer than submitting but this isn't me. Underneath this arrogant face, I am craving to be dominated. I want the possibility of letting go with someone and be able to just feel. I'm so sorry, I didn't want to ruin our evening. Please, forgive me, I will try to be better for you. Please, forgive me." I was on the verge of crying, It wasn't my intentions to pour myself out like this but Jasper had this effect on me. I couldn't resist him.

He still didn't answer me for a few minutes and my shame and guilt only increased. I couldn't hold on the tears any longer, small salt drop ran down my face. I tried to be silent but a sob ripped through my throw. Almost immediately Jasper was behind me, his arms around my waist. He murmured tender, reassuring words in my ear and I ultimately calmed down. My hands unsurely found their way on Jasper's arms.

We both stayed still pressed against the now cool window. I looked over the park and lost myself in the melancholy moment. Jasper has to feel more than just sub affection for me. He was so affectionate and kind and… very hard behind my back.

Suddenly there was a shift of situation, we weren't two broken people holding on each other, we were two naked lovers in the middle of amazing sex.

Jasper's hands slowly moved to rest on my hips and mine pinned on the window. His dick slid again between my cheeks and he resumed his slow pace. My flaccid member was peacefully rising. When I let out a loud moan, Jasper began to stroke me and thrust harder against my entrance.

He was right, if we moved a little, he would be in me, completely connected. With this thought, I was fully erect but I needed to feel Jasper's release. It would prove me that I wasn't alone, that we were together in this, whatever it was. At first, I timidly met his thrust but when I didn't see any objection, I started rocking hard against him.

I felt whole, I could completely abandon myself in my emotions. Jasper was in charge of everything, he madly stimulated my back and my front. It was liberating, I lost myself in a torrent of pleasure. It didn't feel like a session or whatever you called the time I spent with my Master. It felt like two lovers who finally found themselves.

"Come with me, beautiful. Come for me." This sentence, even if it was followed by our releases, broke everything in me. It was the exact words he told me the first time we fucked and he abandoned me afterwards. My perfect fantasy about two lovers making love suddenly vanished. We weren't lovers, we weren't boyfriends. Yes, Jasper wanted me, but just for a sex release, nothing more. It broke my heart.

When I came down from my orgasm, Jasper laid me down on my bed and began cleaning me with a hot towel.

My limbs refused to work any more so I stayed there on my bed. I had a flashback of the horrible feeling of rejection I had when he left me two weeks ago.

I heard him drop off the towel in the bathroom. My chest cranked open and my heart was waiting to get ripped out. I closed my eyes and hang on to see his next move.

After a few minutes, I couldn't hear anything. He was leaving me again except this time he didn't have the guts to even say goodbye or make false promises. My heart was aching under the pressure of every emotion I had tonight. I didn't even realize I was crying until I felt tears wetting the side of my face.

I felt the bed shifted. I opened my eyes and saw Jasper watching me with extreme sadness. He gently wiped my tears away and lay down on his side next to me. He rested his head against my chest and let out a trembling breath.

"Can you forgive me for the way I acted last time? I'm so sorry." I didn't know what to answer. I could never forget the feeling of deep rejection I had when he left me. In answer, I put my arm around his shoulder and caressed his wild hair. Everything wasn't forgotten but we stayed in each other arms, in a peaceful atmosphere.

It had been a very emotional day. Jasper was back in my life but for how long? I knew I couldn't be separated from him but truth be told, I didn't know anything about him and this wasn't a good way to start a Dom/sub or a lovers relationship. I needed to talk with him about that.

After all that happened, I knew I was falling in love with Jasper and this thought alone made me both beatific but also extremely terrified. I tightened my hold around Jasper and inhaled deeply his sent. No matter what my thoughts were, I was with Jasper and with that I felt asleep with a smile on my face.