AN: Rodney/Radek. I'm not positive what the next one will be...I've got a couple of ideas bouncing around in my head!
Written for BiteMeTechie's first sentence challenge "We destroy such precious things."
Beta-ed by the wonderful Trishkafibble.
…Memories…
"We destroy such precious things," Radek whispers, and his hands clench around the back of the chair and Rodney doesn't pause.
"Yes, yes, life is terrible. Come here and help me with this won't you? Do I have to do everything myself?"
Radek almost smiles, but he is transfixed by the thin scar trembling across Rodney's forehead.
Radek almost smiles but he doesn't quite remember how.
"Rodney, I wanted to talk to you—"
"Not right now." Rodney shakes his head and waves a hand and keeps writing.
"Rodney—"
"Yes, yes, I know the lab can't survive for a few minutes without me, but unless you want Atlantis to explode—"
His hands create designs in the air and at times it almost seems like he's typing, or writing, or turning over a device in his hand. His eyes focus on the imaginary, and Radek is choking on words that should have been said before, and fighting the echoes of opportunities lost before they had a chance to be found.
"I'm sorry," Rodney whispers, and Radek almost laughs.
"Me too."
"Radek, I need—I need to talk to you—"
"Check these calculations, will you?" Radek interrupts, handing Rodney several pieces of paper. "I think I understand what this device—"
"Radek—"
"Yes, yes. In a moment. But this ancient device you found—" Radek continues, and Rodney gives in.
"That device was supposed to be waiting for me to look at!"
He doesn't yell. Radek never thought he'd miss his yelling, his belittling, his antagonistic remarks.
Rodney sits in front of his computer and says he's fine. He sits in front of the computer but doesn't remember how to type.
"Rodney!" The voice is shock and fear and pain and concern, and Radek stumbles over debris as he runs to the scientist's side. To his friend's side. "Medical team to the lab! Dr. Beckett—Rodney's been hurt! An explosion!"
He kneels next to the unconscious form of his friend, shrugging out of his jacket to apply pressure to the gash in Rodney's forehead…
Radek wakes from nightmares and thinks they're doomed—not just because they've lost Rodney's brain, but because they've lost Rodney.
There is something terrible in a mind destroyed, and Radek watches the body of the man that he once knew but who now is lost and feels the emptiness, the imminence of his own mortality.
Radek stands in the doorway, watching. Waiting for something, he doesn't know what. Rodney's team is clustered around, and it seems so fitting, so perfect that he turns—turns to go, though he doesn't know where. He doesn't know much right now.
Dr. Beckett is standing next to him—looking at him—compassion and fear shining clearly in his blue eyes.
"How is he?" Radek asks, and Beckett almost winces, almost lets his eyes flicker away.
"He's had severe trauma to the head…he's in a coma, but he should wake up in a few days. We won't be sure of any permanent damage until then."
The words are unexpected and absurd. Radek nods because he knows he should respond. He doesn't speak because he doesn't know what to say. He doesn't know much right now.
Maybe neither of them do.
The cursor blinks at the end of a series of letters, and Rodney watches him desperately, impatiently. Radek blinks eyes tired from sleep and heavy with pain, and slowly the letters coalesce into words, and the words into sentences, and he reads and then re-reads, and then half-yells in shock, cursing in Czech.
"i thnik im getin betr i ned to talk to carsin"
He is asleep, eyes moving rapidly behind their lids, breath coming in little gasps that give the mind easy consent to imagine the worst, to imagine in vivid detail what he dreams of. There are too many fresh and dark memories to pretend that nightmares don't come true.
The sheets are blue—Rodney's sheets from Rodney's room, a luxury granted to such intelligence.
Radek thinks they look soft and brushes a hand across them. He wishes he'd taken the chance to find out before.
Rodney is sleeping in the infirmary after the marathon of tests, and Radek paces outside the door, hesitating, unsure. Beckett comes up next to him and puts a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it comfortingly.
"How is he?" Radek asks, and Beckett smiles.
Rodney sits up in the infirmary bed, looking around him, confused. Radek steps forward, arms crossed in front of him, hiding from the inevitable—from the truth he knows exists.
He never knew Rodney could look so young. So lost.
"Rodney, I need to talk to you—" Radek starts, keeping his voice slow and measured, but Rodney shakes his head slightly.
"Radek…I…I have say to you…" he pauses, frowning, trying to find the words and ideas that keep eluding him. Radek steps closer, eyes widening perceptibly as Rodney slowly looks up, afraid but not confused, cautious but sure.
Neither of them knows what to say or how to say it, but Radek takes the chance he thought he'd lost and reaches out, brushing Rodney's fingers with his own.
His reflexes are still much slower, but Rodney grabs his hand before it slides away.
"I…I know you," Rodney frowns, and then his eyes light up suddenly. "We've got to finish! Come on! Help me with this! The Wraith are coming!" His arms move in front of him in the air, and Radek fights to not turn away. He never knew watching someone live could be so painful.
"Rodney," he whispers, voice hitching on the word, stepping closer to the bed, and Rodney looks up, eyes narrowing in concentration. Unexpectedly he breaks down, crying, and Radek reaches out and embraces him.
"Radek," Rodney breathes, and his heart skips a beat and for a moment he almost believes his friend is actually there.
Rodney is lying down on blue sheets, and Radek sits and holds his hand and Rodney holds his as well, because Rodney is there, half-hidden under the surface, slowly finding his way home.
Rodney pulls his hand back when Carson comes in to check on him, a red tinge rising in his cheeks, and Radek smiles.
His blush is the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.
