Chapter 7 – Food
The current had shifted her. Lifting her body off the river bottom and moving her farther from shore.
Elizabeth and Thatch were now four feet away from land. The water was no more than three feet deep.
Two humans. In three feet of water. Needing to move only four feet.
This is pathetic, Elizabeth thought. I am so close to the bank! I can make it.
And yet, she was afraid to move.
As long as Elizabeth sat in the water, they were safe. Moving meant risking a fall. Moving meant she might be knocked down by the swift current. Moving meant the possibility of Thatch slipping from her arms and being carried downstream. Moving meant danger.
Pull yourself together, Elizabeth. It's only four feet. This is not your first time in a raging river.
Although it is the first time with a twenty pound precious baby hanging onto my neck, she considered with a frown.
She pulled back her face slightly to look her son in the eyes but he was too busy watching the fast-moving water rushing by to meet her stare. Elizabeth looked over her shoulder in the direction of upstream and then to the bank again.
She desperately wanted Jack to emerge from the trees and rescue them. He would know what to do. He wouldn't even have to think twice. He would rush towards them, getting his pants wet and splashing water, as he took powerful deliberate strides into the river. He would pull them out of the churning water with his strong arms. Carrying Thatch and supporting her. He would save them.
If only he was there rather than asleep in the shack.
But he wasn't there. And wishing for him wouldn't make him appear. Just like wishing for the river to stop moving wouldn't make it happen.
Oh, Thatch, how did I get us into this mess? she lamented.
She took a deep breath and looked around again and then at her son. This time with determination. It appears there's only one way out of this mess.
"Don't let go, okay? Mommy's going to get us out of here, so you need to hold on tight and not let go, okay?"
The little boy nodded solemnly.
"What the hell happened?!" Jack exclaimed when Elizabeth entered the shack ten minutes later. "I was just coming to look for you."
"We fell in," Elizabeth unnecessarily explained. She was dripping water from head to toe. "He's got the hiccups", she said as she handed a sopping wet Thach to Jack.
"Why does he have the hiccups?" a bewildered Jack asked.
"How the heck should I know? He's a baby." She immediately started to take off her shoes and socks in slight irritation at how she managed to be such a complete mess. She had bits of silt in every crevice and she could barely untie her shoe laces due to their wetness.
Jack quickly took control of his son and undressed him. The water-soaked garments seemed to stick to the boy's body as if they were sucked to it by the liquid's molecular nature. When he finally got them removed and twisted them with his strong hands, water ran in a rivulet from the fabric.
"It was much deeper than usual. And wider. It came clear up the banks and past the tree line", Elizabeth explained as she took off her blouse and wrung it out. Allowing the water to pool on the dirt floor.
The naked little boy hiccupped and sat on the floor looking at his father in bewilderment. He had no idea why his mother had soaked them fully clothed into cold water only to hurry them back to the cabin and strip them, and he had no idea why his body was making involuntary spasms. Each time he hiccupped, his eyes got even wider in surprise.
"Is he okay?" Jack asked worriedly.
Elizabeth paused with her blouse in her hands and looked at her son. "Yeah, he's fine. I think the cold water startled him. I'm the one that nearly drowned. He was fine. I kept him above water."
"He's sopping wet!"
"I kept his head above water", Elizabeth clarified.
"Did you both fall in? Are you alright? The baby? Did you hurt anything?"
"I'm fine. The baby's fine. Can we not talk about it anymore?"
"You shouldn't have gone to the river without me."
"I know", Elizabeth admitted. "But you were sleeping. And you needed it."
"I don't care. You shouldn't have gone without me. The river must have been swollen after all that rain."
"It was. I already told you", Elizabeth said as she avoided looking at him and tried to act casual.
"You could have been swept away!" Jack exclaimed. He shook his head at her irresponsibility. "What were you thinking?!"
"I was thinking I was being helpful!"
"You could have drowned! Both of you!"
"I know. I'm sorry. But we're fine. Just a little water-logged."
In the last thirty minutes Elizabeth's emotions had gone from pride at going to find breakfast, excitement at the fish, anger at the fish, total fear of drowning her and their son, and finally, as she walked back from the river, extreme irritation that she had been an utter failure at providing for her husband. The last thing she wanted was to be reminded of the danger she had put her son in.
"Don't do it again", Jack admonished her.
She looked at him with an annoyed protest on her lips but held back when she saw the look in his eye. Once again she was reminded that it was easier for him to act angry than to give into fear whenever he was worried about her.
"What were you doing anyway?"
"Checking the fishing line. For breakfast."
"Did you get anything?"
"A mouthful of water."
"So you risked your lives for nothing?" he said rudely as he picked up his son.
"I didn't think it was for nothing at the time". Her annoyance at herself had turned her voice cold. "And I had a fish but it got away. For goodness sakes, it wasn't like I was going in there for a leisurely bath! I was trying to feed us."
Jack looked over Thatch's head, which was now smooshed against his neck, and stared at his now barefoot wife who was standing on the dirt floor. Water from her knickers dripping onto her toes. She had taken off her skirt and was wringing it out . Making her look like a beggar girl who had been caught in a rainstorm and hadn't been able to afford an umbrella. She didn't notice him looking at her as she used her forearm to wipe wet pieces of hair off her face.
Jack took in the sight of his wife. He loved her. He loved this bedraggled independent woman who would do anything for him. He realized that between his expressions of worry and his reprimands, he had forgotten to say the most important thing. His voice, which had been full of frustration, turned soft.
"Thank you."
Jack cracked another floorboard over his knee and added the pieces to the pile which he already arranged in the fireplace. "That should do it", he said.
Elizabeth was sitting in the dirt keeping Thatch occupied by drawing pictures with a stick. The little boy had stopped hicupping sometime between riding on his father's shoulders to lay their clothes on a tree branch and rolling his naked body in the dirt for no particular reason other than he wanted to.
"How long until the wood outside dries enough so we can burn it?"
"A couple days unless we move it out into the sun somewhere. All that rain with the shade of the forest, and the wood's going to be wet for a while. We're just lucky we have these floorboards. But it's a good idea to move some into a sunny spot. I'll do it after we eat."
"I didn't get any fish", she reminded him glumly.
"I'll get us something", Jack declared. "It may take a while, but I'll get us something."
The squirrel was small despite being an adult. Wanting to save his last few bullets until absolutely necessary, Jack had used a rock to kill the animal.
"Where in the world did you learn to do that?" Elizabeth had asked in amazement when Jack, quietly sitting and waiting until his prey was in sight, had brought the squirrel down with a fast rock pitch to its head.
A pleased Jack grinned. "Years of living on a farm and spending all day outdoors. Ma wouldn't always let me and Tom take the rifle but we still wanted to act grown up and put food on the table. We fought over who got to the use the slingshot, and when Tom would start to cry like a baby, I'd let him. That left me with just pitching a rock."
"But that was years ago. And you still have your aim", she responded in amazement.
Jack chuckled. "Playing darts at the academy kept me in good shape."
Elizabeth looked at the meat which Jack had just cooked over the small fire for their dinner. It was no more than the size of her fist. Jack could eat it all in three bites and still want more. Instead, he pulled off a few small bits and handed them to Thatch.
Thatch, his face already stained with berries, nibbled on a piece and then stuffed another one into his mouth.
Jack tore off a small piece for himself and then handed the rest to Elizabeth. It wasn't much, but it was clearly the largest portion of the meal.
"Jack, you need to eat more. Take some of this," Elizabeth argued when she saw the size.
"I'm fine. That's your share."
"That wasn't a very even share. You gave most of it to me", she countered as she took a small bite and then handed the rest back to him.
"You need it."
"So do you," she quarreled as she refused to eat another bite.
Elizabeth had noticed that at every meal they had eaten in the last few days – the berries, the fish, the rabbit, and now the squirrel- Jack always gave her the largest portion. "You're doing most of the work. You eat it", she suggested.
"I'll eat when I catch some fish. I'll check the line in a bit."
"No. You'll eat now. We may not have a fire left to cook any fish even if you catch some."
When Jack refused to take the meat from her outstretched hand, Elizabeth spoke again,
"Please, Jack. You need to eat."
Jack shook his head. "I'm fine."
"At least divide it equally between us."
"Okay," he agreed. It seemed almost a little too easy to Elizabeth.
Jack took the squirrel from Elizabeth's hand and divided it into four pieces, each no bigger than her thumb. "Four equal shares," he declared.
"Four?" she asked in confusion.
"Four." He put one in his mouth, handed the other three to her, and stood up. "There, I've had mine."
"Explain", she ordered.
"One is your share so you need to eat it. One is the share of my son or daughter that you happen to be carrying in your belly. So you need to eat that one also. The third share is for Thatch -"
"He's already had his share", Elizabeth interrupted.
"This is your share for him. You're still breastfeeding him so this is to replenish you. You need to eat extra when you're breastfeeding. If you're going to make sure he has a full belly, I'm going to make sure that you do. Now eat them all and stop arguing. I'll go bring some wood out into the sun and then check the fishing line."
Before she could think of a response, Jack had turned and walked away before Elizabeth could hear his stomach grumbling in hunger.
Jack wondered how any more days it would be until they were rescued.
More than that, he wondered how many days he could wait until he would have to leave Elizabeth in charge while he hiked out of the area and tried to find help.
Two more days. I'll wait two more days.
Jack decided that if the train or some form of help didn't come by then, he'd leave Elizabeth and Thatch and go look for help.
The question was what would they do for food without him. He had spent most of the day thinking about it.
There were plenty of deer in the area and Jack knew that he could kill one with a well-placed shot. But a dead deer without a knife to field-dress it would be useless. The internal organs would spread bacteria throughout the deer's body. Rendering it inedible. It would be different if this was the wintertime with snow and ice to keep the meat from rotting. But in this heat, the fresh-kill would spoil within an hour if the entrails, stomach, lungs, and other organs weren't removed. Without a knife to cut open the carcass, it was impossible to make the deer suitable for eating.
Two days. He'd give it two days. Before he left, he'd kill as many squirrel, rabbit, and fish as he could and feed his wife and son until their bellies couldn't take any more. He wouldn't be able to leave them with any meat or fish - it would just spoil even if cooked - so they'd have to eat up before he left.
He'd gather nuts and crush their shells between rocks, then cook the pile for his family to eat while he was gone. He'd tie the fishing line closer to shore for Elizabeth to reach in an emergency
They can survive off of nuts and an occasional fish while I'm gone.
The gun. What to do about the gun.
After firing his weapon at the snake and then at the coyotes, Jack had four bullets left. If he left the gun with Elizabeth, he'd be traveling for miles with nothing to protect himself. If he took the weapon with him, he'd have to tell Elizabeth to stay inside the shack where she would be safe. She would obey him if he told her how important it was.
But then how will she get water to drink? Or go fishing?
How can I leave her without a weapon?!
But I need it.
But she needs it to protect her and our son. She hates guns but she'd use it if she needed to. To scare away a wolf or coyote.
But that would leave me defenseless. And without any shelter. She'd at least have shelter.
As Jack wandered back from the stream where he had checked the line for the third time that day, he gave up thinking of the impossible choice he had to make. He knew he'd find help eventually. His greatest fear was that when he returned with help, he'd find his family dead.
Thatch was exhausted. His body was limp as Elizabeth took him off her breast and laid him down on the floor. She didn't bother buttoning her blouse which was damp with sweat. She had already rolled up the sleeves and wasn't wearing her shoes and socks; it was simply too hot and humid even in the shade of the forest. It didn't help that they had a small fire going in the fireplace, but they weren't willing to let it go out after they had managed to get it lit again. There was no guarantee they'd be able to light another one.
When Jack finally walked in the structure, he dumped a handful of shelled nuts onto the floor and began easing them next to the burning coals in the fireplace.
"They have to cook before they'll be edible. I'm sorry I couldn't find anymore. I stole these from the squirrel nest that came down with that huge limb. Apparently, the squirrel wasn't a very good hoarder."
"They'll be fine. And help may come tomorrow."
"Yeah, you're probably right. But let's keep these handy in case you . . . I mean we need them." Jack hadn't told Elizabeth of his plan to leave if they hadn't been rescued in two days.
She didn't notice the slip of his tongue as she ran her hand along her neck and shoulders, massaging the aching muscles.
He nodded towards their son. "He's worn out."
"He's definitely more your son than mine. He loves the outdoors. I think he managed to find every rock, stick, hole, thorny bush, and slug out there. He didn't even bother to nap today. Too many puddles to play in."
Jack turned from the fireplace and sat on the floor. His feet flat on the ground with his elbows resting on his knees. He stared at his wife. She was illuminated by the sunset visible through the window opening and by an occasional flicker of the blaze behind Jack.
She looked weary. Her clothes were wrinkled and her skirt had a long rip in it from where it had caught on the thorny bush. Her hair was a mess.
"Do you want me to comb your hair?"
Elizabeth scrunched her eyebrows and gave him a curious look.
"If you give me your comb, I'll comb your hair for you", he offered. "I know you like that."
Elizabeth retrieved her comb from her small bag, walked the short distance in her dirty bare feet, and sat down in front of Jack. With her back to him, she reached over her shoulder and handed him the comb.
"You must be really bored" she chuckled. "But I appreciate it."
When Jack finished detangling her long hair, he gathered it off to one side and moved it over her shoulder. He gently placed his lips on her bare neck.
Her skin tasted salty from the heat.
A relaxed Elizabeth remained silent as she moved her fingers over one another in her hair. Braiding it into a thick plait.
Her fingers paused two inches from the bottom of her hair when she sensed him lower his head again. His breath was warm as it touched her flesh.
The soft exhalation of air from his lungs onto her neck made her feel a stirring farther down her body.
His lips touched her again.
Jack hadn't intended to make love to her tonight. Not here on the dirty floor. Not when they were hot and tired and hungry. But he wanted her. He wanted her before he left her.
Elizabeth tilted her head to the side. Giving Jack access to more of her skin. She loved the feel of his mouth on her.
His lips moved upward to her earlobe. Downwards to the dip behind the collarbone. Along the back just under her hairline. Gauging her reaction.
His kisses made her wonder how it could be that she had never known before how many sensual parts a neck had.
He murmured something but she didn't hear what it was. She didn't care. It could have been next week's grocery list and she still would have found it sexy.
She tried to discern the reason for his tender emotions. Wondering how far he wanted to take things. But then he lowered her blouse off her shoulders and kissed the small freckle between her shoulder blades. Suddenly, she wasn't interested at all in why he wanted to make love tonight in this barren place. All she cared about was how wonderful it felt to have him touch her.
Jack and Elizabeth didn't think about the run-down cabin. Or the woods. Or the heat and the humidity. They didn't think about the bugs and dirt. Or even that they had been desperate to be rescued.
He turned her around and leaned her down, stretching their bodies out until she was lying on the ground under him. He put the weight of his firm body on his forearms. Careful not to press on her belly which was slightly rounded from her pregnancy.
Elizabeth's hands cupped Jack's face as their mouths met, until she finally had to release him so she could breathe. He tasted deliciously like mint. Not the mint of a store-bought Life Saver candy, but the mint from the fresh green leaves they had been chewing to dull their hunger.
His tongue wet the skin between her breasts, and his breath became ragged as he moved on her. She lifted her arms above her head and he pulled her undergarment off. The clothing with its fine Belgian lace trim had been pristine a few days ago. It was now wrinkled and soiled with stains of berries and sweat as it landed in a crumple on the dirt.
His mouth began to roam her body more, inching farther down her soft smooth skin until it got to the waistband of her skirt. She could hear her own breathing, fast and deep, but she didn't try to contain it.
They didn't worry about Thatch. He was far too tired to be awoken by their sounds.
Elizabeth felt the moist heat between them as she struggled to take off Jack's shirt, pushing it off his shoulders.
He moved his hands on her, pushing up her skirt.
He needed her. He needed to love her one more time before he left her.
Up next: Chapter 8
