I already split chapter 5, but now I was reaching over the nine thousand words with chapter 6 so I decided to split it once again and reward you all with another chapter! I just really want to publish something because your reviews make me so happy, I want to do something in return for you.

Chapter 7 is almost finished too.

A little note: I wasn't contend with the dates. I understand you all don't want to read back and check so I'll list what I will change (not today but somewhere tomorrow because I don't have time now):
- August 2019 (unchanged): the chapter starts from Sakuma's perspective with the diary.
- September 2019: They visit Kidou's grave together
- January 2020: Fudou scolds his students and gets fired

There are a lot of time leaps but I think Fudou needs this amount of time, I personally thought I underestimated the time he needed. I want months to pass, that's why it has a lot of gapes.

*sighs* this is what happens when you make a plan and get so much inspiration you start to change things.

Anyway, enjoy!


July 26, 2020

If there's anything Sakuma as been receiving it are phone calls, about Teikoku matters, complaints, worried parents, and Fudou.

The calls involving Fudou were the most outstanding ones.

It started while Sakuma was at work, usually he ignored it when someone calls him on his own, private cell phone, but the unknown caller had been so persistent that eventually he couldn't resist his curiosity any longer and picked up the phone. He was quite shocked when he heard a male voice yelling at him on the other side "Make it stop! Please, make it stop!"

A little while later the over worried one-eyed man was on his way to Fudou's apartment once again. He could not understand much from the confused and crying man but he took it as serious rather than ignore it. There could be drugs involved. The thought of calling an ambulance had crossed his might but he'd first like to see the condition his friend is in before he involves the hospital. If they get their hands on him it will just be a matter of time before the police is interrogating him too and if there are really drugs involved he's risking Fudou's freedom. On the other hand, maybe the police or a rehabilitation centre would be for the best.

When he arrives the door is on a ajar. Sakuma suspiciousness increases, as for his heartbeat. Fudou sounded so helpless over the phone, what could possibly be going on? "Fudou?" He calls out, but there's no reply. He considers asking help from the neighbours, but then he gets reminded of what Fudou told him. The apartment on the left is uninhabited and the other one is only used for cultivating cannabis plantations. "Fudou?" He yells again. "I'm coming in!" He gives a soft push against the door and steps over the threshold. The very first time he visited the corridor was filled with empty pizza boxes, trash and weeks old post, but this time there is a little difference. The trash and rotting boxes are still there, as for the smell, but the mail is shred in pieces all over the floor. "What has he been doing here?" He whispers to himself as he tries to make his way through without touching anything too filthy. He needs support from the wall, the only light is coming from the door that he left open behind him.

He finds Fudou on the floor with his back against the wall, huddled, with his head on his knees and his hands buried in his hair. He's surrounded by torn pieces of paper and the usual rubbish. "Fud—" He gets interrupted by the phone next to Fudou on the floor that starts ringing. A second after Fudou lets out a complaining moan. "Shut up! Make it stop!"

Sakuma crouches next to his friend, one hand on his head to reassure him and the other holds the device to decline the call. "There, it's gone." He whispers, assuming the man on the floor as a killer headache and the loudness of the phone was bothering him. Fudou raises his head and they look each other in the eye. Sakuma gives him an encouraging smile. "I'll help you get up." Sakuma holds the man's shoulders and guides him to the couch so he can lay down. "Is that better?"

Fudou nods, almost unnoticeably. "I'll get you some water." Some time later they're sitting on the couch together. Fudou with trebling hands, holding the half empty glass between them. Sakuma puts his hand on his knee and squeezes gently. The brunette seems to be coming to his senses again. "Sorry for calling you out here."

"It's no problem at all," he replies, relieved that his friend still has his common sense. "you know that I am just one phone call away."

Fudou shrinks after he takes the word 'phone' in his mouth and his eyes slide across the room in order to find the cause of his minor panic attack. Sakuma follows his gaze, actually expecting him to be looking for something else. "It weren't drugs, don't worry. I ain't high this time, nor drunk." The tense in Sakuma's body lessens but he's still dubious. He's not sure if he can trust him on his word just yet. If there aren't any drugs involved, then what was he doing on the floor in complete panic, and how would he explain the even bigger mess he made?

The sound of the phone reverberates through the room for the second time within the fifteen minutes that Sakuma is inside and just like before Fudou's behaviour changes drastically. His eyes widen and he's holding the glass so tightly in his hands that his knuckles are turning white. When Sakuma meets his eyes he can see the exhaustion and an almost begging look in his unusual, empty eyes. "I'll take care of it." Sakuma takes the device from the coffee table. "You're connected to the Kidou-household," He immediately falls in his old role as secretary, curious about what Fudou is so afraid of. "Sakuma Jirou speaking. What can I do for you?"

"I am calling on behalf of Premier Pool Plastering and we're trying to reach Kidou Yuuto..." There it was, his name. Hearing it felt like a slap in the face. Not too long ago they confirmed that the address and landline were properly changed. It had taken some delay because at first the brunette refused to change it to his current address, but it had to be done before he got in trouble with the law. This must be what Fudou is dealing with, and it explains the torn mail. Sympathy is certainly not the first word that would come up in him when he describes how he feels about Fudou Akio, especially not when you'd ask his younger self, but right now it's the only thing he is able to think of.

The man on the phone rattles on about how they cancelled their plans all of the sudden last year and if money would be playing a role they could offer them a great sale. "I'm sorry to interrupt you, sir." Sakuma's eyes rest on the male next to him. "But the Kidou Yuuto you are trying to reach is no longer with us. His partner moved to a smaller apartment and there is definitely no room for a pool here."

The other man is silent for a brief moment. "I am sorry for your loss, sir. I'll make sure that it's noted that we will not call again. Have a good day."

"I appreciate it." And with that they end the call. Sakuma exhales a deep sigh and puts the phone back on the table. "I assume that this was your problem?" When Fudou doesn't answer he gets up and crouches to collect some pieces of the shred papers. They all carry Kidou's name on it. "Doing this won't change anything, the letters will keep coming if you don't handle them." He says, well aware that he won't get an answer this time either. "I'll help you sort them out, but I will need your help."

Fudou sighs deeply, at least, that's what Sakuma thought, when he looks up at the other male who is still sitting on the couch he sees that he lightened a cigarette and was exhaling the smoke through his mouth. "Smoking kills, you know."

"So does driving your car above the speed limit."

A smile curls on Sakuma's lips. "So you noticed." He did indeed ignore a few traffic rules in order to get here faster, and he's quite sure that when he returns home he'll probably find a ticket waiting for him for driving too fast within the urban area. With the cigarette still between his lips Fudou crouches next to him and holds a few envelopes in his hand. "Whaddya need me to do?"

The two men are sitting on their knees in front of the coffee table. The cleaned the table itself and a little of the floor around it, but Sakuma took it safe and is sitting on a pillow. Fudou is trying to find some missing pieces while in the meantime Sakuma sorts them on the base of importance. Offers, subscriptions, different kinds of facilities, outstanding bills, all sorts of letters and they're all dictated to Kidou. Sakuma realises that Fudou won't be able to handle this on his own, the man is not stupid, not at all, but the condition of his house describes the mess in his head all too perfectly. With a suitcase full of official envelopes to handle and phone numbers to call he leaves the house about a full three hours later, with the promise that he's coming back to clean the apartment with him later this week; something he should have done way earlier..

Sakuma knows that he's taking a lot on his plate right now, and he still has his job at Teikoku to maintain too, but he promised Kidou and himself too that he would look after the isolated widower. He cannot neglect him now that he needs him most.


March twelve, 2021

The amount of phone calls Sakuma had to make and was receiving increased within a few days after he had taken the task on him. As soon as he could he called certain companies to assure that they would not bother Fudou again and his fear of the sound of the phone would become less. According to Fudou the calling did indeed stop and the mailman continued his routine of delivering useless flyers to both of their relieves. Fudou expressed how thankful he was for Sakuma's hard work by making a little start with the cleaning of his corridor. Whenever Sakuma visits him he has at least a clear path to the living room. It warms Sakuma's heart to see him put this much effort into it, his own hard work seems to encourage him too. Of course, there are still days he has absolutely zero motivation and gets nothing done; days like that he falls back in his old habit of drinking and drugs abuse. It takes quite some time but eventually he manages to snap out of it, and this circle continued for months. March is the month that Kidou got officially diagnosed with cancer, reason enough for the brunette to pick up the bottle and start drinking again.

Sakuma was on his way to work this time when a private phone number called him. "You're speaking with the local police department. We have arrested a man named Kidou Akio this morning and he told us to call you as his emergency contact. Are you Sakuma Jirou?"

An old, strict looking police officer guided Sakuma to a small room where they have to fill in some formats before he can take the arrested man home with him. When the police officer had ended the call earlier the immediately phoned Genda that he should let his boss know that he won't be coming to work today. He turned his car and had driven to the police station to pick up his friend. He couldn't help but smile a little to himself though, at least Fudou had asked them to call him; he's showing some progress.

"May I ask why he was arrested, officer?"

"He was arrested for public intoxication. We received a couple of phone calls from worried citizens earlier this morning about a man causing noise nuisance." The officer looks down at his papers and states what is written on it for him. "We found the suspect yelling at the local super market that it should 'shut its trap'. The suspect was carrying a bottle with him and when we asked him to put it down he forcefully smashed it against the wall of the said supermarket. We brought the suspect to the ground and arrested him on the spot and brought him to the station to let him spend the rest of the night in a cell. He was not carrying any other alcohol containing liquids, a weapon nor drugs when we arrested him. That is the end of the rapport." The officer puts his glasses back on his nose. Sakuma cannot suppress a soft sigh of relief. Fudou had not been arrested while carrying any drugs and he had just been drunk, also his cooperation with the police would work in their favour.

"Thank you, officer. I would like to take him home now. He may look like another homeless drunk, but he has enough money to bail himself free. Of course he'll pay the penalty that comes with it too." If he plays it smart now, he could get Fudou free right now. It's a risk, but often sentimental talks work in your favour. He's playing the dead husband card. "He has recently lost his partner and he's not enduring it very well."

"How old was his partner?"

"Only twenty-five, sir."

The old man shakes his head. "That's way too soon. I remember my own father's condition when my mother passed away. I can't say that I approve of it, but I understand his situation." He rises from his office chair and nods firmly. "Alright, I'll allow you to take him home, but I have to warn you. They brought him in around four this morning, he's not quite sober yet."

"Thank you, officer." Sakuma gets up too and bows. "I wouldn't worry about it, it is not the first time I have seen him like this, unfortunately." He adds, giving the man in front of him a small hint of a smile.

"I'll call someone to release him, you can wait in the main hall, we'll bring him and his belongings to you in a bit." The old man seems to hesitate but then puts his hand Sakuma's shoulder. "Take good care of him. He needs concerned friends like you."

Sakuma is quite taken aback but he'd never use his professional attitude, nonetheless, showing someone that he is indeed human too would not be any harm. "I appreciate your kind words, sir. I certainly will."

He had not been waiting for too long when they brought the somewhat struggling Fudou in, along with a plastic box, the 'belongings' the officer had been speaking of, Sakuma presumes.

"I swear to drunk, I am NOT God!" The man slurs while the handcuffs that were still around his wrists got removed. "Yeah, yeah." One of the young officers sighs. "You've been telling us that since you got arrested this morning. Well, you're free to go now." Sakuma chuckles briefly, the sight of his drunk, barefooted friend in handcuffs slightly amuses him. Maybe it's the younger Sakuma's ego laughing as reaction to seeing his childhood nightmare being released from prison, but either way it's not every day that this scene occurs in front of him. Thankfully.

"Come, big boy." Sakuma holds his friend's arm. "We're going home." With the box under his left arm and a drunk man clinging on his right Sakuma leaves the building, but before they head out his eye falls on the clock. "And it's not even nine am yet."

As soon as Fudou sobered up and his hangover almost vanished Sakuma sat down with him to have a serious chat with him. Fudou is laying down, stretched over Sakuma's sofa with his arms over his head. He can't even pretend that he's not listening anymore because the bluenette refuses to stop ranting until Fudou finally gets it.

"And it's not just about your alcohol consuming rate, with this also comes the money you spend on gambling and other illegal activities, the mayhem you make of the place you're renting and the drugs that you were luckily not carrying around you when you got arrested this morning but you're obviously still using. Do you know how thankful you should be that they didn't test you on drugs for whatever reason? You are not only ruining your health but also destroying your own life. It's about time that you stop using Kidou's death as an excuse!"

Fudou flinches, if Sakuma didn't have his attention earlier then he certainly has it now. What he is about to say is unlikely for him and it's difficult to get it over his lips but it has to be said. Fudou has to face the reality as it is today. "We have all suffered but we are all moving on. I know that you're thinking that you'll never find someone like him again, and you know what, you probably won't. There is no man as him and if you don't want someone else then please stay single for the rest of your life but this has to come to an end. Stop pitying yourself, you have to start living your life again, it's been two years. You're simply hiding behind his death, and if you were waiting for some sign then this is. This is your final wake up call, Akio."

It's one of the first times he called his friend by his first name. After Kidou passed away they continued calling him Fudou, the first few months it was because they didn't dare to confront him with their friend's name and saying it out loud was still aching them too, but Sakuma found himself in a position that he could not say Fudou's first name. He somehow refused to, maybe deep inside he could still not admit that he can call this man his friend. But that is his own conflict.

"I thought more of you," he says while he sinks back down on his chair, out of frustration he had gotten up earlier but seeing that the brunette still shows no response at all he doesn't see the need of him still standing. "The joker, weren't you?" Fudou's body twitches again. "Inazuma Japan's secret weapon, and look at you now. If Kidou had not been so smart to leave the budgeting to me you would have been deep in debts, stinking drunk and extremely pitiful."

He paused to see Fudou's reaction, and that he waited got rewarded. It was barely audible but he did hear a low, annoyed groan coming from the man on the sofa.

"Yes, I pity you, Fudou. What did you call your own students again, losers? Ungrateful, incompetent, helpless, disadvantaged idlers, if I remember well. Congratulations, because those are the exact same words I would describe you with now. You are ungrateful, not because you don't appreciate my hard word, no. You're ungrateful towards Kidou. After everything he has done for you, you show him this. YOU of all people should be grateful that you are still alive! You're incompetent and disadvantaged because you still don't manage to stand on your own feet after two years of mourning. I do not see any progress at all. You're still the helpless mess you were when we first took you in. Even the Resistance Japan had a higher chance of winning against the World top players than you getting back on your feet. You told those kids you would rather sell drugs and live on the streets than coach them, are you happy now because you've almost achieved that dream. Ah— you didn't know that yet. Your landlord called, you're as good as homeless if you refuse to clean your apartment and keep delaying the date of paying the rent."

Another grunt of discontent can be heard, louder this time. Fudou is starting to get angry. Sakuma smiles a little to himself on the inside, it looks like his plan is working. He just needs to push him a little bit further over the edge.

"You have almost nothing left, Fudou. I'll be keeping an eye on your money and you will receive a special credit card from me. I'll be taking care of your rent, with your money of course, but you will get a specific amount of money for one month and nothing more. So whether you buy booze and cigarettes of it or you do your daily groceries is completely up to you but be aware that I'll be maintaining your money and if I am not content with your purchases then I'll completely shut it down. I want you to find a job on your own too, you can't just spend all the money Kidou has left here for you. You should make your own money. When you can show me that you have your life back on the rails, you have a job and you can actually keep it, you can take care of your own house and quit with the drugs and alcohol I'll give you everything I took from you back. But only under these conditions. I am not punishing you, Akio. I'm trying to help."

There follows a long silence this time, Fudou has not moved an inch during his endless lecture but Sakuma is certain that he heard every word of it. He might not support it, Sakuma is even aware that he could jolt up now any second and grab his throat again, but he had to let him face the consequences of his unacceptable behaviour. Enough is enough, he should draw his boundaries too.

"Alright."

Sakuma's head shoots up. "I'm sorry, what?"

Fudou slowly removes his arms and pushes himself up so he can sit up straight. "I said, alright."

"Are you serious?" Sakuma stammers, he almost can't believe his own ears. He expected a struggle at least. "I mean, you agree with everything I said?"

"Yeah." Fudou shuts one eye and starts picking with his pink in his ear. A feeling of relief and pure happiness is overwhelming Sakuma, it's overwhelming him to the point that he leaves his chair and wraps his arms tightly around the brunette for a tender embrace. Fudou almost flinches, almost. He doesn't like physical contact, or rather, he hasn't been held like this ever since his husband passed away. Sakuma soon grows aware of what he's doing and wants to withdraw himself from the embrace but Fudou's arms are stopping him. "Not yet."

Sakuma can feel the other man's arms slide around his waist as gets drawn closer to the man he used to hate, he's able to feel his hot breath on his own skin and smell a hint of the beer he had in it, Fudou smells like sweat and cigarettes but none of that matters now because all of those things fade away from his thoughts when he feels the brunette's heartbeat through his chest. It's faster than usual and he's sure his heart rate raised too but it makes him realise that Fudou is not just a drunk screw up with a trash-speaking mouth. This man needs love and affection too, something he hasn't been able to feel for a long time. After his mother passed away Kidou was there to give it to him, how could Sakuma have forgotten that he needed this kind of support just as hard. Fudou is human too, after all. "Thanks." It's the softest whisper he had ever heard from him but Sakuma could not have felt any prouder of him. He buries his face in the crook of the other man's neck and they shift into a more comfortable position, just holding each other, for as long as Fudou needs.

After this night Fudou made a serious attempt to start living again. The budget management idea from Sakuma seems to work, he found a job as bartender and is earning his own money know instead of depending on Kidou's fortune. He also went back to seeing the therapist after Sakuma insisted. Fudou finally seems to be able to turn the helm and head to a life with a better future perspective.


Thank you for reading, please leave a review!