In which the boys argue and Zero acts weird. He does that a lot. Next chapter should be the last one!
It felt like I'd been sleeping for weeks. I was so heavy, my limbs weighted. Movement seemed impossible, but as usual, I knew I was in the infirmary. It was practically my room now. That didn't mean Zero wasn't in trouble for getting me stuck in here again.
"Finally up, Daiba?" he asked as if on cue. His question was punctuated by a blast that made the ship groan and shudder around us.
"Under attack again?" I mumbled, dragging myself up to sit.
"Harlock seems popular among those Mazone," Zero frowned. He was seated on the side of my bed, not looking particularly concerned about the attack. "Your cast is off by the way. Had to get stitches though."
"Stitches?" My eyes narrowed. "What did you do?"
"Don't remember?" He gestured to my arm. I realized a bit late that I was missing a shirt, and bandages had been wrapped around my upper arm. "You've been out for about three days. Really freaked the doctor out. He was upset because you seemed to be sleeping for no reason. I'm not entirely sure what all those injections were but…" He was obviously trying to hide a grin.
"If I wake up in the infirmary one more time because of you!" I snapped.
"What'll you do, kid?" he smirked.
"I don't know but it'll be painful!"
"For you probably."
Well...he was probably right. At a loss for a comeback, I just glared at him. His smirk widened, and he patted my head a few times.
"Cut it out!" I hissed, waving his hand away. "I'm not a little kid. Stop treating me like one." I felt like I'd told him that so many times. Why didn't he get the picture?
"That's cute, kid. I'll stop treating you like one when you stop acting like one."
It didn't matter if he was just kidding around anymore. It wasn't funny. I was not a kid. I didn't act like a kid! I'd done a hell of a lot more than most of the lazy bastards twice my age. "Kids don't fight in wars," I spat.
"That's not true," he sighed. Another blast rocked the ship, reminding me of what was going on, but he took little notice. "Your captain might tell you that war will make a man out of you, but that doesn't mean you're not just a kid trying to lug around a rifle and boots that are too big for your feet. No matter how much you deny it, you're still a boy, and I've seen boys and girls much smaller than you dragged into a fight that they didn't deserve any part in. Wars are for the old men that start them, but we always make the children fight them for us."
"I'm not a kid," I insisted, though some of what he said made sense.
"Why not?" he smiled tiredly. "Be a kid while you can. It's fun. Get some enjoyment out of life. You don't want to end up like me."
I didn't but… "There are things I need to do. I don't have time to be a kid." I clenched my now-uncast hand into a fist. It seemed to work just fine. "I have to be a man now."
His smile was gone. "You're not a man just because you've taken a life. If anything, I'd say that makes you less of one."
"You're just saying that because you're dead."
"No," he frowned sternly. "I've always believed that. How many people have you killed? Do you know?"
What the hell was he talking about? "Including that psychopath or-?" I began snidely only for him to cut me off.
"No, you had no part in that, but including the Mazone."
"The Mazone aren't people," I spat. The ship took another hit as my rage came to a boil. This must have been a bad fight.
"Oh really?" he snapped. "They're intelligent beings, are they not? From everything you've told me, I'd say the only difference between you and them is the color of your skin. So one of them killed your father, but how many mothers have you killed? How many sisters? How many do you think have taken up a gun vowing to wipe out all the humans in revenge?"
"That's not…" He didn't know anything. Not a damn thing. "You think they're human, but they're really just murderers. They don't care. They don't even have familial bonds… I don't think." I forced a laugh through my uncertainty. "Hell, they're just plants."
He sighed irritably, and roughly messed my hair. "I can't tell you that revenge won't make you happy, because it sure feels satisfying at first. I'm no role model. I've vowed revenge plenty of times. I know how much it will eat at you, how much you feel you need it. But listen to me."
I peered up at him between my mess of bangs. Sadness touched his irritation. "Killing them isn't going to bring your father back. No matter how many lives you take, you can't regain one. Revenge will never bring you the fulfillment you think it will. It may bring Harlock satisfaction, but he's different. You're not like him, no matter how much you wish you were, so make certain you have something else in mind that you know will keep you happy once this is all over."
Maybe revenge was what I needed. Maybe he didn't know what he was talking about, and no one ever said I wanted to be like the captain. "You…you talk too much," I huffed. The fight seemed to have quieted down around us.
"I know," he smiled. "When I was a captain, I was once referred to as 'that obnoxious yapping dog that probably knows where Harlock is.' I think that's your title now."
"Oh ha-ha," I grumbled. "What do you mean 'probably knows where Harlock is?'"
"His enemies always assumed that I knew his whereabouts because we were…'friends.' Same went for the earth government when-"
"I got it!" I yelled as a flash of a memory swam through my head. I shuddered, trying to rid myself of it. "God, stop thinking about things. I can only take it up until you get to the torture. This conversation needs to be over."
He just laughed. "Oh, come on, kid. The earth government doesn't torture. It 'interrogates.'"
"Well they're just lying assholes. That's what they are," I huffed, puffing my cheeks.
"I'll agree with you there," he grinned. "But I do appreciate that you're trying to help them."
"No one said I was trying to help them," I frowned.
"I'm still grateful that you'd protect the Earth after what it's done to you, even if it's just for revenge. That was my home, and I'd hate to see anything happen to it."
"Yeah whatever," I waved the conversation away. "About you and your duel fetish-"
"Please don't call it that."
"-your duel obsession – how do you want to set that up? I mean, how do duels even work?"
He stared at me blankly for a moment, seemingly waiting for a joke. "You were a very sheltered child, weren't you? Did you ever see any old western movies growing up?"
"No, I'm not old like you."
As usual, he smiled at the insult. "I'm going to ignore that. Basically, now that we've got a saber, all we need to do is to set up a time and place. Likely the next planet we stop at will do. If you're really confident you won't try and disappear on me again, I'll just use you to cut Harlock down."
Whoa, hang on. I shook my head frantically. "You're going to kill him!?"
He raised a brow, trying not to smile. "That's the idea, yes. What did you think was going to happen?"
"Well, if you could beat him, you'd stop before the whole killing part." I really doubted that Zero could be near as skilled with a saber as the captain, but if he somehow was, that meant that captain would die at my hands. Or the captain would kill me!
"If?" He pouted slightly. "The only reason I wouldn't be able to beat him would be due to your stubby arms."
"But you don't need to kill him!" I insisted. My arms weren't stubby.
"It would be a sin not to, a dishonor to him and myself. See this is one of those things 'real men' understand."
"I think it's just stupid," I scowled. "And I really don't want to get killed when Harlock beats you."
"Oh, I'm sure he'd hold back for you. Then again, you have been causing a lot of trouble lately. I wouldn't blame him if he wanted to take out a little stress on you." He exaggerated his words to show he was kidding. I threw him a dry glare for his efforts.
"You're an idiot," I drawled.
"Ah, but I'm you're favorite idiot."
"No."
"You know it's true."
"No it's not."
"Who's your favorite then?"
"I don't have-"
"Then that leaves it to be me."
"God, if I were Harlock, I'd kill me too. You're so annoying!"
He barked a laugh, hooking his arm around my neck. "You know I do it just for you, kid. It's too much fun not to. Everyone else used to complain that I brooded too much."
"Let go of me or I'll-!" I was about to deliver a threat so deadly that it surely would have scared him, but the door slid open, and the venom was lost in my throat. "Hey," I greeted slowly, "Kei."
Maybe if I acted normal she wouldn't notice anything.
He stared wide-eyed at Miss Kei. He'd gone a ghostly pale in his terror, though at this point I would have figured he'd gotten over this whole mess. I released his stiff neck with a sigh. "I don't think you could be more conspicuous if you tried, kid."
"Hi, Daiba," she greeted, forcing an uncertain smile. "H-how've you been?"
"Fine," he nodded slowly.
"The captain says you're not crazy," she nodded in return, her eyes flicking around the room to avoid him. "But he wouldn't say what was going on."
"You don't have to sound so unsure of yourself," the kid muttered. "Did you really think I was crazy?"
She chewed her lip. "Oh, I don't know. I was just worried. I'm still worried. You're not making any sense. You're talking to yourself and hurting yourself and sleeping for days on end. The captain won't tell me what's going on. What is it, Daiba? Are you really okay?"
Her motherly affections tugged at my chest. What was this girl doing on this ship? She seemed to be the one running everything most of the time, and she was still patient enough to deal with the kid. Marina would have gotten along well with this one. They probably could have exchanged stories about how they kept their captains in line and the ships in working order.
"Hey, kid," I called as he searched the ground for an answer. "Let me talk to her."
He answered by furrowing his brow, half in annoyance and half in curiosity.
"We'll call it a test run to see if you can handle being a ghost again," I prodded. "Don't worry, I won't do anything crazy. I'm not trying to freak her out more."
He breathed a sigh of acceptance, and I placed my hand to his shoulder. "Don't do anything stupid," he growled as he appeared in my place. I smiled up at Miss Kei and stood.
"Don't worry too much," I said, stepping up toward her "You're going to make yourself sick like that."
She immediately sensed something off, eyeing me with a frown. "I wouldn't have to worry if you didn't give me things to worry about."
"I'm honestly sorry about that," I laughed. "I know it's a bad habit of mine." I wasn't trying to speak for him. I was responding as myself, but it fit him just as well in this case.
"It's a terrible habit," she huffed, taking an uncertain step back as I neared her.
"Hey," the kid warned behind me. "What are you doing?" I didn't bother to answer. I was just happy that he wasn't trying to fade away on me again.
I offered her my hand along with a bow. "You just need to relax a bit. I promise everything's fine."
"You're not acting fine," she frowned, tentatively placing her hand in mine.
A light tug was all it took to pull her toward me. My free hand settled on her waist as I gave a spin. "Who's to say we need to act fine?" I grinned. Her steps stumbled behind mine. She obviously had no previous experience with the waltz. Luckily, I did.
"W-what are you doing, Daiba?" she stuttered. The kid yelled a similar question, only with a few more colorful words involved. I caught a glance of him and couldn't help but grin at the cherry-red of his face.
"You're supposed to put your hand on my shoulder," I noted to Kei. "Even though I'm shorter, I am leading after all."
In her state of shock and confusion, she did as she was told. Her steps began to work with mine a bit better.
"Sorry I don't have any music," I smiled. "I just figured you needed some cheering-up."
She giggled brightly as I gave her a twirl. "You're not Daiba," she said once we'd returned to form, her nose wrinkling with her grin.
I laughed in agreement. She'd hit the mark and she didn't even realize it. "I know," I said. "I'm better."
"Hey," the kid grumbled.
"You're not going to tell me what's going on, are you?" she sighed through a tired smile.
Her feet moved smoothly now, stepping just out of the way of mine. "You don't need to worry about it," I answered softly. "Everything's fine, so just enjoy yourself for a bit. You deserve it. You know, you're quite the dancer. I'm impressed."
"You're a creep," Daiba called as I dipped my dance partner. He always had to take things the wrong way.
A blush dusted Kei's cheeks as she laughed again, breaking away to hide her face in her hands. "Oh, stop that," she giggled playfully. "I have to go check some things. We can dance some more later. Ah, no! I mean-" She rushed out, giggling and trying to hide her startling blush.
"Guess I'll have to teach you how to waltz, kid," I grinned over my shoulder.
"I didn't know you were such a creep," he scowled.
I stepped up to him, poking his cheek to make sure he was solid. Then I placed a firm smack to the backside of his head. "I'm not a creep. I just know how to treat ladies. She was obviously upset, and I just wanted to calm her down and cheer her up. Now then, hear anymore voices?"
"Huh?" he frowned, confusion splayed across his face as he rubbed the back of his head. "Just yours."
"Do you not remember that either?" I asked curiously. "When you started fading?"
"I got distracted and floated off," he shrugged. "What voices are you talking about? I think you're the one losing it now."
"…never mind," I murmured. Maybe it was best not to talk about that. There were certain things I'd decided that humans weren't supposed to know. Certain things about death and what came with it. For the longest time, I'd thought I was one of those things.
"Hm," he brushed it off. "I better get back to my room before anyone else shows up. Here, switch with me."
"Alright. Not going to wait on the doctor?"
"Oh hell no. Keep him away from me."
Amusingly, he was caught by the doctor before he could escape, but after a quick check-up, he was released. I wondered what Harlock had told the man. Unlike Kei, Dr. Zero had dealt with me plenty. The old doctor and I had an interesting time trying to keep our names straight. I'd shared drinks with him. But he didn't act as though he knew anything while he examined the kid. I was used to be ignored and forgotten at this point. It didn't bother me.
It wasn't until he'd made it to his room and changed that we realized we were landing again. "Already?" he frowned.
"That sounded like an ugly battle. Maybe the ship needs some repairs."
He eyed me, probably remembering that the duel would take place next time we landed. "Anything in particular I should have or wear?" he asked after a moment.
I nodded to the saber in the corner. Harlock must have put it there. "That's all."
He paused. "Do you…want to kill him?"
"It's not a question of if I want to. I'll do it because I have to." Because if I tried to decide if it was something I wanted to do, it might make my hand hesitate at an opportunity to do so.
I'm not too sure what I'm writing anymore. Daiba's too dumb to get when someone's trying to help him get on a lady's good side. Probably because Zero's preferred method is as strange as possible. I'm a quality author.
