Ahh… God, what am I doing?

I stand behind a wall, my head slightly sticking out so I could see and my ears attentive to eavesdrop on the conversation. Okay, I know what you all are thinking.

What's this guy doing? Who the hell is he watching? Eww! What creepy glasses—stalking a couple! He must be a virgin! Oi! That last comment was unnecessary, wasn't it?! Take it back! Take it back for all the bespectacled men in the world!

Anyways, I am currently not stalking, but tailing my best friend—little sister figure. Plus, I must discover her connection with that guy.

Especially if that guy is a platinum-god level handsome college student.

And it is exactly because of that guy that I am here, behind this wall, and acting like that gorilla who stalks Sis.

Okay.

Maybe not that bad.

I shudder at the thought of the gorilla-like man named Kondo Isao. Let's get back to Kagura-chan. I focus on the two teenagers as they stood in the park. I had followed the pair from G Uni's entrance to the neighborhood park. I have no clue what they are going to do, but all I know is that they are really focused. Kagura-chan is staring at the brunette guy intensely as if she was glaring daggers at him. Meanwhile, the brunette was silent and holding his own against Kagura's glare. The wind blew through their hair and clothing just adding to the serious atmosphere.

No side was making a move.

And that's when the pebble drops.

At great speed, both sides were in front of each other, only a forearm's length apart. Two fists in the air and their eyes widening into a glare.

Then, their fists met.

Neither side gives and inch. I go into a little shock. This guy—he's equally matched with Kagura-chan?!

Both sides smirk in a bloodthirsty sort of way before charging at each other again. However, this time, both landed a blow. Kagura-chan's fist screws into the brunette's cheek but the same could be said about the brunette, as his own fist had landed on Kagura-chan's cheek. After a brief pause, they continue to fight, not only did they punch their opponent, but they also used their legs to kick and knee the other and their heads the headbutt.

I pale as I see where this is going. They are going to kill each other! I run out of my safe spot and run towards the two, my arm extending. "Stop this you two!—"

Pow!

I'm falling backward from the blows. Both sides had given me a good punch to my face, and now I was falling onto my back. I glance at the two as I do. Kagura-chan's ocean blue eyes were widening simultaneously to the brunette's own red-brown eyes. Suddenly, I feel my eyes getting heavy and everything is becoming dark.

Ahh… so tired…

"Shinpachi!"

When I woke up everything was pitch black.

Huh? Where am I? Am I dead? I look around me but all I see is pitch black. And that's when I heard that familiar voice.

"Oi, oi. Pachi-boy wake up."

Who is calling me? Why does this voice sound so familiar?

"Come on, hurry up and wake up Pattsuan."

How do I wake up? Aren't I already awake? Actually… judging by this guy's tone of voice, I guess not…

"We are going to eat all the food without you Glasses."

Huh? More voices… and different ones at that…

"He can't eat anyways, he is only glasses."

What?! Who said I was only glasses?!

"Oh yeah, I forgot."

What do you mean you forgot?! I was never Glasses in the first place!

"He'll wake up later anyways, after all, his Glasses aren't broken."

"WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!" I jump up, now awake, and scream out. Then I freeze, confused by the sight in front of me.

There sat Gin-san, Kagura-chan, the brunette from earlier, Katsura-san, Takasugi-san, Sakamoto-san, Hattori-sensei, Kondo-san, and the last one that I can assume is Hijikata-san. Everyone was squished into the large dining table: Kondo-san, the brunette, and Hattori-sensei were sitting at one end of the table, Kagura-chan sat in between Sakamoto-san and Gin-san, Next to Gin-san is the black-haired man who is assumably Hijikata-san, and next to him is Takasugi-san and Katsura-san. There is one more space, which I assume—and hope—is for me: across from Gin-san and between Katsura-san and Hattori-sensei.

Kondo-san is the first to break the silence. "O-oh! Shinpachi-kun come over and join the table! We were just about to start eating!"

I don't really like the fact that the gorilla was inviting me, but seeing the big group I somehow felt warm inside. I smile and walk over to them, "Thank you!" I slip into my seat between Katsura-san and Hattori-sensei.

We all let out, "Itadakimasu!" before shoveling down the food. This is when it hit me that something was wrong.

"Wait!" I abruptly interrupt the dinner, everyone looks up from their bowls to me. "How did I get here?!"

Gin-san is the first to respond. "Well, you see, Pachi-boy. It all started when I passed by the park earlier…"

Next, Kagura-chan continues the story after chewing her mouthful and swallowing. "Sadist andI had just knocked you out, and he was desperately thinking of ways to get away with murder-aru!"

"You mean you were! China was mumbling about how she could beat you until no one could recognize you and then throwing you in the river!" The brunette whose name I still didn't know argues.

The two of them stand out of their seats and glare at each other from opposite ends of the table. The one who put a stop to their fighting is Gin-san, "Anyways, basically they were both plotting to assassinate you." He then pushes Kagura back into her seat and Kondo-san tries to pacify the brunette. Gin-san explains, "So that's when I come around the park and spot the three of you. Of course, I tried to save you—I rushed to you and checked your glasses."

"Why are you checking my glasses?! That makes no sense! Check my actual body!" I scream at Gin-san, but my argument is left ignored.

"Then, after seeing you were alright, I decided to take the two brats and spectacles back home. Kagura-chan and Okita-kun badgered the Gorilla to let them into dinner, so I thought might as well include you too!" Gin-san explains before ending with a sigh. He puts his hand on his forehead and shakes his head. "Honestly, Pattsuan. I had already warned you to leave her alone. She doesn't even think about romance yet, not to mention boys! That small head of hers is filled to the brim with thoughts about sukonbu and fighting. But—no—you just had to not listen to Gin-san—and now we have two brats eating all our food!" The silver perm man complains exasperated.

A laugh comes from beside me—it's Katsura-san. "Hahaha! Gintoki is just being shy! He loves more company!"

Another laugh echoed from the other end of the table—Sakamoto-san. "Yeah! Ahahaha! Ahahahahahah! Kintoki is just embarrassed that he was caught carrying you and the other two by us! Right Zura?"

"It's not Zura, it's Katsura!" The long-haired man shouts at the other man.

"Both of you shut up, we can never eat our meals in peace with you two laughing!" Takasugi rages at his two friends.

"Yeah," Hijikata-san adds in as he grabs the mayonnaise. "You are going to ruin my appetite." Then, Hijikata-san pours out the mayonnaise over his place, coating—no the word is more like drowning—his dinner in the condiment. I can feel my stomach stir at the sight, making me feel sick.

Okita-san—I believe his name was—adds in in a monotone voice. "Hijikata-san—the sight of your eating habits makes the world lose it's appetites!"

Gin-san also adds in in that same annoying tone, "Oi, oi. Who ordered the dog food?" The brunette and silver perm sadist duo have now an alliance. An alliance which is meant to make Hijikata-san miserable. Poor… Hijikata-san… That was all the compassion left in me as I see the three argue across the table.

Hattori-sensei then abruptly rises from the table and starts dashing out of the room. I look back with a confused look, but everyone at the table paid no attention to Hattori-sensei's sudden outburst, so I too brushed it off. About twenty minutes later, Hattori-sensei comes back looking extremely worn out.

I never asked the reason why.

I smile and enjoy my food, as I watched the whole group bicker and eat. I have to admit. This was one strange group, but it was a great big odd family.

Kagura-chan notices my smile, and she slides over more to Gin-san and mutters. "Wah! Gin-chan, spectacles is giving out a weird smile. Look at it! It just screams out I am an otaku virgin who will never get laid! How lame!"

Gin-san puts his hand over his mouth, poorly disguising his talking. "Shh! Don't let the Glasses hear you. We don't want to catch his otaku-virginitis!"

I can feel my vein pulse, and I can't hold back anymore. I jump out of my seat to yell at the duo. "What the heck does my smile have to do with me being a virgin huh?! What the hell is 'virginitis' huh?! Don't make my virginity sound like a disease!"

"Eek! The Spectacles is getting angry!" Gin-san fake shrieks. "Everyone run!~"

"Don't screw with me!" I scream.

Then, I feel a hand on my shoulder which makes me turn my attention to its owner. The Gorilla gives me a reassuring nod. "Now, now. Shinpachi-kun, just let them have their fun. We should have this party be lively and fun!" He then suggests. "How about you call over your sister right now? She can still join, we have a lot of food! Hahaha!"

I can feel a vein pop. "Like I would call Sis with you here, you gorilla stalker!" I brush off his hand and sit back in my seat to continue eating. From the corner of my eye, I could see a gorilla sulking in his seat, and Okita-san somewhat comforting, but at the same time teasing him.

"Oi." The abrupt deep voice of Takasugi-san rang through the air. "Are you guys drinking my Yakult?"

I hear a giant slurp from Gin-san, Katsura-san, and Sakamoto-san. Sakamoto-san is the first to reply. "Ahahaha! Ahahahahah! What are you talking about?"

Gin-san slurps in more. "Oi, oi. Don't go blaming your friends, Takasugi!" He slurps in more. "Ahh… this Yakult tastes great…" he mumbles the last sentence under his breath.

"Yeah, Takasugi! How could you!? We are your best friends!" Katsura-san takes a sip from his cup. "Mmm… I agree, this Yakult tastes good…"

"You both just confirmed that you are drinking my Yakult," Takasugi growls.

Gin-san is the first to react, by nudging Hijikata-san. "Hey officer, Takasugi is making false charges~ Tell him that he is wrong!"

I look at Hijikata-san, he has been very quiet even with all these people shouting around him. Huh? Wait a second… Is Hijikata-san… sweating?

Now that I look at it, Hijikata-san was sweating bullets as he drank from his cup. He answers somewhat shakily. "Y-yeah! Takasugi, you are just imagining it!"

Takasugi-san's face goes dark. "Hijikata! You traitor! You all are drinking my Yakult aren't you!"

"Ahahaha! Ahahahahah! It's out!" Sakamoto keeps laughing as he drinks more of, what I assume to be, Takasugi-san's Yakult. Takasugi starts shouting at Sakamoto-san, Gin-san, Hijikata-san, and Katsura-san; sometime during the fight, Okita-san and Kagura-chan started to fight, Kondo-san was still weeping, and Hattori-sensei was ignoring everyone while reading Jump.

I feel my eyes soften at the picture.

We are all like one big family…

Ding, dong. The doorbell rings. "I'll get it!" I get up from my seat and walk to the door. Putting my hand on the handle, I unlock the door and open it. "Hello, who may you—" Then I froze.

In front of the door was the devil—my sister. Her smile chills me making me shudder as I feel her ferocious killing intent. "Shin-chan. What are you doing here without me?"

I feel my blood run cold as I start to break out into a cold sweat.

A fist rises and punches me square in the face. I fly backward into the living room, skidding across the wooden floor.

Yep.

One big family.