Dean did not recall ever putting that L-word to Cas' name. Not consciously, at least. "Do we have to talk about this?" he stuttered.
"It's not required, but neglecting how you truly feel can't be healthy."
"Yeah well," Dean moved back from the angel and relaxed his shoulders. There was still some shame inside, even though Cas was totally right. "Whatever."
"Whatever? That's really all you can say?"
"What am I supposed to?"
Cas frowned and stepped closer to Dean once again. He reached down to the man's pants and lightly touched the bulge beneath his fly. "Is this 'whatever'?"
"It's a boner."
"I thought human males didn't have bones there."
"Not really a bone, just what they call it. It's a hardon."
"This is a sign of love?"
"It's a sign of arousal. Love's got nothing to do with it."
"Dean." Cas stared up at the man with sad twinkles in his eyes but Dean looked away. "I heard you. I sensed it. You said that you love me. You remembered the moment I pulled you from perdition. Do not pretend I am unaware." Dean sighed but remained silent, still refusing to look Cas in the eyes. "It felt right. It felt as if you were finally returning home. Is that correct?"
"Y-yeah," Dean said softly.
"Then why do you continue to shun the truth? Your soul yearns for ego's acceptance."
"I don't know what the fuck that means," Dean grouched.
"It means you are lying to yourself," said Cas. His hand went from Dean's pants up to his face, where he lightly touched the man's cheek. It was clear to Dean that Cas was actually showing signs of nervousness. The very touch made him shy and that caused Dean to come to a sudden realization.
"Cas?" he whispered.
"Yes."
Finally Dean's eyes fell back to the angel. The green globes wiggled with a soft intensity which was usually reserved for reminiscing over his father or having a falling out with Sam. Cas knew this and he appreciate it.
"You're having a fight inside too, huh?" Dean asked.
"Yes," the angel said quietly. "That is true. I have been harboring these strong feelings for you yet I am unsure of how to express them. Now I have some guidance but it still gives me, I'm not sure how to call it; nervousness?"
"You don't have to be nervous," Dean said. If he treated it like he was Cas' first crush, which he seemd to be, it put it all into perspective. "It's okay."
"When our lips touch, this is a sign of affection?"
"Yeah."
"Then we will do this again." Now the angel closed his eyes and leaned into Dean once more. Still he didn't move much, but Dean held the ropes and sucked Cas' mouth hotly. Touching him like that made a switch inside Dean flip; once contact was established he suddenly wanted Cas and nothing more.
"I need something," Cas cried out after he moved back just a bit.
"What? What is it?" Dean whispered.
"I-I don't know."
"Um. What does it feel like?"
The angel started to breath heavily. His hands grasped Dean's shoulders tightly and he pulled him close, staring. "It feels like we need to move fast. Something is aching within my vessel and it needs, oh, it needs to be scratched I think."
"You need sex?" Dean suggested, raising his eyebrows.
"I don't know. How is it possible? Males and females engage in these acts with penetration of the penis into the vagina, if I'm not mistaken. But we both possess penises and neither vaginas."
"I never thought sex could sound so un-sexy," Dean groaned. "But uh, you know two men can do it."
"How? Please tell me how!" A sudden sense of urgency grasped Cas as he hooked Dean closer. So many emotions and feelings welled up within him yet he was completely ignorant as to what they were and how to manage them.
"You ummm," now Dean started to blush. He never, ever thought this sort of conversation would come up between the two of them, let alone anybody! "The dick goes into the butt."
"The butt? You mean this depository hole at the end of the intestines? That is a portal for intercourse?"
"You gotta talk about it like that? Jesus."
"What am I supposed to say?"
"I dunno. But uh, yeah. Dick in butt makes sense. It doesn't make kids but it definitely makes sex."
Hunger flushed over Cas' face as he grew hot, intense. He leaned just a few centimeters away from Dean's lips and begged, "Then do this. Make the sex with me, Dean."
"Right here? Right now!?"
"Please," the angel whined. His body quivered.
"Okay uh, go over to the sofa." Dean was also pretty nervous. The more he touched Cas the less he could deny that desire to fuck him.
In a flash, they disappeared and came back on the sofa, so that Cas was lying on his back and Dean was on top. The angel spread his legs but looked confused. "You will have to help me as I don't know what I'm doing."
"That's fine. Here, um, just…"
Dean bit down on his lower lip as he unbuttoned, unzipped and finally pulled down Cas' pants. At first it was a little painful to see the genitals since Dean always considered penises to be closer to the unattractive side of things, but once he adjusted his eyes to really see Cas through it all, the vessel became appealing. Even the dark nest of hair that peppered the whole area seemed inviting.
"Okay, just, well, you need to lu-"
"I don't care," Cas barked urgently. "Just insert yourself. I need this. We need this."
"But-"
"Please Dean, please."
"Well alright."
Dean unleashed his serpent from the front of his jeans and pressed it against Cas' hole. It seemed impossibly tight. "I'm not one to judge personal taste and whatnot," Dean mumbled. "But it's really supposed to be lubed up."
"Or else what?" Cas asked. His chest heaved violently with desperate, needy breaths. It was amazing to see the angel in such a state.
"Or else it's really gonna hurt."
"It does not hurt me. Please just make the sex. Please."
"Don't say 'make the sex,' okay?"
"It does not matter. You are aware of what must happen. Please do this. Please."
Dean inhaled deeply and began to push himself inside. Cas showed no signs of pain, instead he rolled his head back, closing his eyes real tight and groaned.
"Oh! This is, this is incredible! Dean!" Cas cried out loudly. His body shook violently as Dean started to thrust his cock, working his abs with a slow, hard, rhythm. "Th-this is what humans experience? Like this?"
"Yeah," Dean moaned. Once he was fully inside the angel he leaned down so that their chests pressed together. His hands cupped Cas' face and he kissed him several times, knowing that Cas would be able to read all of his thoughts. They were pretty much beyond the point of holding things back. Yes, Dean; finally beyond the point of holding things back (tsk tsk).
"Increase the velocity!" Cas cried. "I believe we will both benefit from this! Oh!"
"Damn," Dean cursed as he fucked the angel harder. Huffing and sweating against the crook of Cas' neck, he moaned deeply.
"D-Dean," Cas groaned. "I have never experienced such intense sensations. Your penis is of a substantial size, and the g-girth is magnificently satisfying."
"Cas?" Dean huffed.
"Y-yes?"
"Shut up."
The angel resorted to moans and cries instead of words, even though he didn't understand what the problem was. But Dean's will was Dean's will and he agreed regardless. The huffing, straining, sweating and grinding continued for a brief period until Dean suddenly sensed and impending orgasm.
"Are you going to cum?" Dean groaned. Beads of sweat splattered onto the angel's face.
"I-I don't know. Where is that?"
"Ugh," the man grumbled. "Orgasm. Are you gonna orgasm? I'm really close, don't think I can—unf-hold back much longer."
"What is orgasm?"
"Damn it!"
Despite his best efforts, Dean tensed up and unleashed a massive load deep within Cas. His back stiffened and he collapsed into Cas' neck, groaning something fierce.
"What happened?" Cas asked, sounding a little bit concerned.
"It was—ugh—an orgasm. I—ugh—climaxed." Dean did his best to catch his breath as his cock deflated. His heavy body laid upon Cas, heaving and huffing with great shakes.
"What is that? It has left many small pieces of you inside of me."
"It's sorta the point of sex. You go at it until you cum. Then it feels seriously awesome and then you sleep. Are you saying you can't cum?"
"I don't know how to respond to that."
Dean sat up and looked their bodies over. Lo and behold, Cas had shot a load out. There was a fine opaque rope of cum against the strip of stomach bared by his crumpled shirt.
"Dude," Dean said. "You did. You came. You had one. Didn't you feel it?"
Cas shook his head. "I noticed nothing special."
"That's so fucking sad," Dean said. He shakily got off of Cas and stood on both feet. "So what good is sex for you?"
"I don't know."
Before Dean could analyze angel sexuality any further, his phone went off. It rang and it woke up Sam, starting him off with a sudden bout of tears.
"Ahh shit," Dean cursed and took his phone out. "It's Bobby. Can you do something with Sam? And put your pants back on."
"Yes." Cas nodded and sat up, got dressed then went to the crib to tend to Sam. He picked him up and tried to rock him back to sleep.
"Hey Bobby," Dean said into the phone.
"You alright, boy?"
"Yeah why?"
"Y'sound a little outta breath."
"I uh, left my phone in the kitchen so I had to run to get it."
"You're in terrible shape," Bobby grunted. "But listen, I think I got a lead on how ta fix Sam's problem."
"Oh yeah?"
"There's a guy who might know a cure fer it. And lucky you, he's local. Probly take ya an hour 'r two ta git there."
"Awesome. You got the address?"
Cas listened to the phone call as he prepared a bottle for Sam. A conflicting emotion inside he said he preferred Sam as a baby, yet destiny would call for the reversal of the spell. He put the nipple into Sam's mouth and the baby began to drink.
"Cool. Thanks, Bobby. I'll talk to you later." Dean hung up the phone then went to the kitchen to see how Cas and Sammy were doing. "How is he?"
"Sam?"
"Yeah duh."
"I believe he is hungry but that is all. Bobby has found someone to aid us with this problem?"
"Yeah, and we gotta head out real soon. I can't handle this much longer."
"Of course. Are you also requiring food?"
"Cas, I'm always 'requiring food.'" Dean laughed and went over to his pile of crap to get ready. He packed the usual necessities and slung his duffle bag over his shoulder. "Alright let's—Damn it!" Cas was gone. But then he came back right away and he had a bag in his opposite hand.
"I didn't have time to cook so I brought this for you," the angel said and forced the bag onto Dean.
"Er, thanks," Dean said. He snatched it away and looked inside. There were two burgers and a big box of fries. "Oo, double thanks. But now we gotta go."
"Son of a bitch. Where is this guy?" Dean groaned as the two and a half men stood before the door. He knocked again but still no answer.
"He isn't home," Cas stated.
"Yeah no shit. Ahh fuck." This was disappointing because it took almost three hours to get there, and they really needed Sam to get fixed soon.
"Dean?"
"What."
"Dean, I am having an issue."
"What's wrong?"
Cas looked more awkward than usual. He shifted the baby in his arms, leaned close to Dean and said, "I am having a boner for you right now."
"I'm not surprised. If you can't experience an orgasm, are you ever gonna be satisfied?"
"Dean," Cas said. "Dean please. I need something."
"Ugh. What do you need?" Dean put his hands in his pockets and turned away from the empty house.
"I need to, what did you call it again?"
"Have sex?"
"Yes. I need to have sex with you."
"Okay, I tell you what; let's nab a motel close to here and stake it out all night so when this dude show's up we'll be first."
"Alright."
They returned to Baby and did just as Dean directed; they stopped at a very nearby motel and set up for the evening. Lucky them, they even got a room with an actual crib.
"Be good Sammy, okay?" Dean whispered to his brother as he lay him down in the baby bed. Sam bubbled his lips up at Dean and smiled a little. "Yeah, there you go. Do you wanna sleep with Mr. Holster? Yeaah, you wanna sleep with Mr. Holster!" The closest thing to a baby toy was a soft leather holster than Dean was willing to put out of commission for the infantile Sam. The baby took it gently from Dean's hand and held it close, putting the edge of its strap in his mouth.
"Dean," Cas said loudly.
"What."
"Come here."
Dean turned around and saw Cas standing with a six-pack of beer in his hand. "This is for you."
"Well thank ya, Cas. That's what I call room service." He swaggered over to the angel and plucked to six-pack out of his grasp, took one beer out and cracked it open. After a long chug, he wiped his lips and grinned. "Smooth."
"That makes you happy, right?" Cas asked.
"Yep, sure does."
"I want to make you happy."
"You do."
"Good. Then I am doing well." Cas probably should have smiled right then, but that was still a bit out of his ability. Instead he stepped awkwardly close to Dean and stared.
"You need something?" Dean asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes. Sex."
"Right, right. Uh, listen Cas; you don't really set appointments for sex. It has to just happen."
"Just happen?" Cas sighed. "Like this?" He reached out and placed both hands on Dean's chest. He rubbed in slow circles. "Does a massage increase your desire for sexing? It is supposed to."
"Y-yeah," Dean said. He finished off the beer and set down the empty glass. "It does, but uh…"
"What?"
"I dunno. You can try other things."
"Such as performing fellatio? 'Making out'?"
"Uh, yeah. Both. Both work."
Cas slipped his arms around Dean's neck and pulled him down for a kiss. He was already getting better. Their lips smacked together and Dean started to ease into arousal once more. Feeling the angel was a good, steady reminder of what love was really underneath it all.
"Penetrate me, Dean," Cas said weakly.
Without an answer, Dean slammed the angel back against the wall of the room and fumbled his pants. They dropped to the floor and he lifted his legs up around his own waist. Somewhere in the mess of clothes and kisses, Dean took out his cock and positioned it between Cas' ass cheeks. The angel stayed with his legs upon Dean, supported between the man and the wall, staring up at him. His eyes grew big and hungry.
"Alright," Dean whispered. He pushed himself into the tight pucker hole and started to thrust. Cas furiously ripped at Dean's shoulder with his hands, digging and digging into the fabric. Then Dean began to pound him harder, smacking his head into the wall. Cas cried out in deep, throaty moans of ecstasy while his hands started to wander all over the man. He went beneath the bottom of his shirt and pulled it up, revealing Dean's sleek and firm body. Momentarily the man let off the wall so that the shirt could come off entirely. It dropped to the floor and Cas put his hands back on his body. He touched the smooth skin all over, still shouting and crying in pleasure as the rod slammed him hard. Cas' hands moved to each of Dean's shoulders, and the right one fell in line with the burn mark.
"Damn, damn!" Dean screamed. He felt his orgasm building up but he desperately wanted to go further. "You gotta be able to cum, Cas!"
"I-I don't know!" Cas responded. He stared wide-eyed at the man as his ass was slammed rigorously by the sweaty body before him.
Once again, Cas had a useless orgasm. This time Dean saw it; the vessel's penis throbbed bright red then shot a weak load out. Cas didn't even respond in the slightest, just continued to rock his hips towards Dean's torso. It was really weird, even for Dean who had basically seen everything in the sack.
But then Dean worked harder. He growled, bit down on his lower lip and fucked Cas at an incredible rate. The angel screamed loudly; so loud that he almost started to go hoarse. The wall thump-thump-thumped with their love making, echoed by grunts from them both. Cas' hand gripped tightly into the burn mark as well as the opposing bicep.
"C-cum, Cas; you g-gotta cum!" Dean winced between heavy breathes as he power fucked the poor angel.
Cas screamed out in the throngs of ecstasy, loud and wild; but the mortal moans faded and slowly a shrill tone replaced them. That high, ear-splitting scream of angel communication flushed out of Cas and filled the room. Dean cried out loudly, half in pain but half in pleasure, the sonic wave searing his ears. But he kept humping, he kept fucking. He slammed Cas through the sharp ringing and it continued to get louder. Then all at once – POW POW POW! The lights in the room exploded and everything shook. Cas' hole clenched tightly around Dean's cock and then he heated up. His body turned white hot and Dean released his load within. He closed his eyes and Cas clung to him desperately as the room filled with a tingly, tense air. It all came to a head and Dean hugged the angel close.
He was thrown back. Dean was pushed with a crazy strong might to and across the floor. His head banged into the foot of one of the beds and he almost lost consciousness.
"Uggh, damn," Dean moaned. He opened his eyes slowly, now that everything had settled, and focused on Cas, who had collapsed onto the floor. "Cas!"
He crawled over to the angel and shook him. "Hey! Cas! You okay? Shit." But he was out of it. Still breathing, but somehow asleep.
"What the heck?" There was a strange, fine powder all over Cas. Dean ran his fingers through it and noted it resembled that sort of dust that you get from touching a moth. Then he looked up and noticed it was falling everywhere in the room. Then he looked at the wall and saw there were two big, giant imprints of wings smeared where Cas had been railed. Dean touched it to reveal it was the same powder. Luckily it was just pressed there and not burned on.
"Damn," Dean said to himself as he hoisted Cas up into his arms then laid him on the bed. The angel remained asleep. His cheeks were bright red and he snored softly. He looked over at the crib briefly and saw that Sam was still somehow asleep. How lucky was that? Dean smiled a little and rested beside Cas and thought, "an angel's nut is serious business."
