First off, in his defense, Shizuo (and probably most people that knew the louse) never would expect the flea to be a parent. Why?

His sadistic behavior.

His job.

No one would actually expect this.

Tsuki ran ahead of them into the enormous apartment and kicked off his shoes, going over to a little desk that sat next to what could only be the informant's. He set his bag onto a couple of hooks on the side and started to get out his drawings, turning on his little computer and wiggling in his little computer chair.

"…tch."

"I know, like father like son-"

"Mother. Like mother like son. You're his mom." Shizuo started to reach for his smokes when the flea rounded on him.

"Give it."

"Hmm?"

"Your cigarettes. There's no smoking in my apartment."

"Fine." He tossed the packet at the louse and went further into the apartment, taking in the artwork on the walls, the plants, the bulletin board of drawings that hung next the flea's desk; the large picturesque view overlooked the edge of Shinjuku and the expanse of Ikebukuro.

The phone on Izaya's desk rang and Tsuki stood up to pick it up, "Orihara residence… Mhmm. Hold on," he put his little hand to the receiver. "Vatti, it's for you."

"Thank you Tsuki." Izaya skipped over and lifted the phone from his young charge, kissing his forehead and answering the phone.

"Ah, Tsuki… Do you always answer the phone?" Shizuo walked over and looked at him questioningly.

"No, but sometimes vatti has to use the restroom and can't answer." Tsuki smiled and went back to his little chair, spinning around in it.

Shizuo sat on the edge of Izaya's desk and frowned. The kid was awfully young to be owning and working a computer, let alone answering phone calls.

"…No, no, Namie-chan. I am only docking your pay a little bit," the louse laughed for a minute before his gaze turned dark, "Namie~ You don't want to play this game with me. I won't play fair~"

"Dad?"

Shizuo shook himself out of his thoughts and looked down at the boy.

"You aren't going to be fighting with vatti, are you?"

"Why would I do that?" Shizuo gathered up his energy and picked the boy up, grinning despite their company. "He's letting you and I get to know one another. How can I fight him about that?"

"I don't know…" Tsuki nuzzled into his chest and Shizuo smiled wider.

"You ready for bed?"

"Not really. I don't want that mean woman to come back and you to go home…"

"I'll stay all day tomorrow if you want me to."

Izaya stared at them, clearly oblivious to his phone call as the low sound of someone speaking came through the receiver. The informant watched their exchange and red eyes flickered back and forth between their expressions.

"Really?" Tsuki looked up at him excitedly, his red eyes bright and wide.

"Yep. I'll even toss the couch in front of the door in order to stay." He bounced the kid in his arms and Tsuki laughed.

"Cool!"

"First off though, we can't have you falling asleep as we do things. When you wake up, you can show me what you like to do here."

"Okay." The little brunet wrapped his arms around his father and snuggled close in his arms. "My room is right next to vatti's."

"Alright."

~.~

Izaya stared after them as the duo headed to Tsuki's room.

"Orihara. I don't wait around all fucking night. My boss or not-"

"Namie-chan, such language." His voice carefully hid his displeasure as he returned to the work at hand. "I don't particularly need a secretary who is incapable of doing her own job-"

"Don't even give me that. Nowhere in my job description does babysitting some snotty brat exist."

"Careful Namie…" His voice remained teasing even as dark undertones took part. "You are being so mean~"

"Whatever. I'm taking tomorrow off."

"Fine~ I'll be working on some other things anyway;" Namely stopping some family man debt collector thinking to take his son.

"Bye."

Izaya hung up the phone and made a b line for the bedrooms. He stopped short and took to eavesdropping, lying his head against the wood.

"Dad... Do you really hate vatti?"

"We had some bad run-ins when we were younger…" Shizuo sounded nervous.

Good. I hope Tsuki scares you out of my house.

"Does that mean that we'll never be able to all go play somewhere?"

Yes, Tsuki. Daddy is a protozoan and vatti is a busy person who has no time to do anything with that brute except kill him for making me a freak of nature and have a kid like some chick… not that I regret ever having you.

"Of course not."

Huh? Izaya blinked in surprise and pressed closer, he did not hear that right. It sounded like the man had just said no.

"Vatti and I will both play with you tomorrow."

"But vatti has to work-"

"Nope. I'll even steal his phone away and crush it to make him spend time with us."

"…just don't make vatti mad though…"

Shizuo's laugh could be heard from the other side of the doorway even without having to press his ear to the door. "I won't. Don't worry about it. I'll go talk to him now, alright?"

"Okay…"

"Goodnight little flea."

"Night Dad."

Izaya backed away from the door and shot away as he heard the sound of Shizuo heading out of the boy's room. He rushed to the confines of his desk and took position in his seat, revving up his computer screens and pulling up his latest work.

The blonde entered on cue a few seconds later. "Izaya…"

"Oh. Shizu-chan, what do you want now?" Izaya glanced away from the screen he was typing into and stared at the brute.

"I need to talk to you."

"Ironic. Usually we just speak by playing cat and mouse in the streets. I didn't install any vending machines into my apartment… or stop signs."

That was grating on the man. He balled his fists and those mocha eyes narrowed, "it's about Tsuki."

"I see. Aren't you a little late to be taking part in his life? Think about it. The father he's never really gotten to see, but hear about all his life and suddenly you pop up and expect him to just run into your arms? It's a common family issue. Children are very fragile things. They resent parents that are gone from their lives, even if they run off on business trips or fight off somewhere in a war. It hurts them."

"Shut up! I would have been here the whole time had you had the guts to tell me that you were-"

"Would you Shizu-chan? Or would you have killed me before an abomination came out of me." Izaya walked around his desk and glared at the man. "You did, after all, mention that I had to be gay because no woman would want a baby of mine."

"…Izaya-"

"If I had told you, you would have killed Tsuki and me."

Shizuo shook his head, "I…"

"You what?" Izaya walked right up to him and looked him straight in the eyes, "tell me I'm wrong."