In the quiet twilight moments before dawn, Mateo slowly found his way back to consciousness, feeling more content and at peace than he had in days. He had slept deeply, not having moved an inch from where his head had fallen on the plush feather pillow the night before. The finely woven cotton sheets and the thick down comforter enveloped him in a cocoon of comfort and warmth, leaving the young wizard hesitant to move from his blissful state.
Though, he realized with a satisfied smile, most of that may have been directly related to the soft, warm princess still fast asleep in his arms, the sound of each of her precious breaths filling him with a quiet joy.
Tilting his head slightly, he found his nose buried in her hair, inhaling the sweet scent of her–– the scent of vanilla and sun ripened strawberries. And though he was still a bit groggy, his heart was light. His arms tightened around her as he thought that having her so close in the night felt so incredibly right.
Mateo was quiet as he observed the slowly waking world just outside his window, noting how everything seemed to be holding its breath as it awaited the dawn. It gave him hope knowing that a new day was about to begin, full of potential and endless possibility–– and like the day, he too, was full of potential and endless possibility.
The past few days had been full of emotional ups and downs–– doubts, fears, uncertainty–– yet Mateo felt ready to face the challenges before him. He was determined to use this opportunity to learn what it meant to be a leader–– a prince worthy to stand beside Elena as she ruled her kingdom.
He just hoped he wouldn't disappoint her.
Kissing the top of her head, Mateo snuggled closer to the sleeping princess. As he ran his fingers in idle circles around her back, he paused. Feeling the linen fabric beneath his fingertips, his heart fluttered with surprise and his mouth went dry as he remembered what she had worn to bed.
His shirt.
Nothing, but his shirt.
Such a little minx, he thought with a rueful smile. Pressing a feather light kiss to her temple, he wondered if she truly knew how hard it was for him to behave like a gentleman when they were alone like this. She was just too desirable for her own good.
But she was his world and his everything. His number one priority was not worrying about whatever it was that he wanted, but taking care of her needs. And she needed to make it to her coronation day without some huge scandal making that more of a challenge than it already was.
Even though he found it nearly impossible to resist her; denying her anything was not something he found easy to do under any circumstances, especially not when what she wanted was something that he wanted just as badly.
But he would try, nonetheless.
His musings were interrupted as Elena stirred, her fingers pressing into his back as she curled herself more tightly to him and yawned. Tilting her head back, she blinked up at him with a slow sweet smile.
"Good morning, mi amor," Mateo said with a soft smile of his own.
"Morning, querido," she replied, stretching her neck to brush a sleepy kiss against his lips.
Mateo brushed his fingers across her cheek and up into her hair, murmuring, "We should probably get up soon."
"Mmm…but the sun isn't even up yet," Elena grumbled, sliding her leg up and over his hip, pressing him to her as if to keep him from leaving, "I'd much rather stay here–– in the warm, soft bed with the blanket snuggles and your arms around me."
Chuckling quietly, Mateo said, "As would I but––"
Elena flinched into his chest–– startled by the sharp rapping of knuckles upon the door.
Knock knock knock
"Mr. Mateo? Sir?" a muffled voice called from the other side of the door.
"––but Maria will be here any moment," Mateo finished with a wry grin, kissing her forehead playfully before sliding from the bed and calling out, "Just a moment!"
"What are you doing?" Elena whispered.
"Just lie down, I'll be right back."
Mateo slipped his pajama top off and grabbed his discarded white shirt from the previous day, and slid his arms into it but left it open. Running his hands through his hair, he rumpled it up even more than it already was and turned to Elena before whispering, "How do I look?"
Biting her lip, she looked her fill from his wild bird's nest hair to his bare chest peeking out from the unbuttoned shirt down to his rumpled pajama pants.
"Like I really want to kiss you…"
Grinning crookedly, he said, "Hold that thought."
Hurrying over to the door, he cracked it open, rubbing his eyes with one hand as he peered out. Sure enough, Maria, the young housekeeper charged with keeping his suite tidy, was patiently waiting on the other side.
Surprised at his appearance, she took a step back, eyes darting away from his half buttoned shirt, saying, "Mr. Mateo! I'm so sorry! Is everything ok sir? You're usually up and out of your room by now. I hope I didn't wake you!"
"No, no, It's no trouble, Maria!" Mateo said groggily, running a hand through his hair, "I'm– er– I'm just running a little late this morning. I'm really sorry––"
"No, it's ok sir, I'll come back in an hour sir," the maid curtseyed and bustled away.
Shutting the door quietly, Mateo turned back and exchanged a mischievous grin with Elena.
"Nicely done, querido," she complimented him, holding out her arms in invitation, "We have a whole hour to ourselves now."
"Thanks!" he grinned at her as he approached the bed, continuing, "Though we should probably dress for breakfast."
"Oh, come on. The sun hasn't even fully risen yet. Come back to bed. Please?" She stared at him with wide pleading eyes, batting her eyelashes at him.
Laughing, Mateo sat on the bed, saying, "Well, how can I say no to your famous sad puppy dog look?"
"You can't!" she said brightly, wrapping her arms around his waist and pulling him back to her. Eyeing his unbuttoned shirt, she ran a hand over the bronze skin of his chest and said, "You know? I could get used to the unbuttoned shirt look on you. Perhaps you should wear it more often?"
Laughing, Mateo said, "Right, because everyone wants to see that."
"Well, I know I do."
"It's a privilege extended only to you, mi amor."
"I suppose I'll consider myself special then."
"You should," Mateo replied, kissing her forehead, "Because you are," he murmured softly against her skin.
Snuggling into his side, Elena sighed happily and said, "I wish we could stay like this all day."
Mateo kissed her hair, murmuring softly, "Me too, amor, but we have a lot to do today."
The anxiety of the previous day began creeping back as he started listing off the tasks ahead of them, "We're meeting up with Gabe and Naomi this afternoon to set the official departure date and find out if our captains will even be able to take this job and then we need to find out the specs of those ships so we can compare the capacity to the the estimated number of refugees. And then there's the lists of supplies we'll need and––"
"Whoa, calm down querido, don't worry. We'll get all of these things taken care of. You're not alone in this, remember?" Elena propped herself up on an elbow and looked down into the precious face she loved so much, noting the worry in his eyes. She brought a hand up to gently smooth his hair back from his forehead and brought it to rest on his cheek.
Closing his eyes and pressing into her touch, Mateo took a deep, calming breath, and said, "Right, you're right. Sorry."
Elena smiled and lay back down, wrapping her arms around him. They were quiet a moment as Mateo held her close and idly ran his fingers through her hair, thinking through his abandoned notes from the night before. His fingers froze and he groaned as a thought occurred to him.
"Querido? What is it?"
"I– I can't believe I didn't think of this yesterday, but I need to go see my mom. I can't run off on this expedition without telling her. Plus, she deserves to know about–– this."
"Ooh! You're right! She will want to know about your–– er–– Nicolás. You should definitely go first thing after breakfast. Do you want me to come with you?"
Mateo thought about that a moment. He always wanted her around–– her presence was soothing and always boosted his confidence, but––
"Er–– I–– I should probably do this alone."
"Oh, ok," Elena said, slightly crestfallen, "If that's what you want"
"Not really," Mateo sighed, stroking her hair, "I'm sorry, mi amor. Selfishly, I'd feel so much better knowing you'd be there beside me, but I just–– I don't know how she is going to react and if it goes badly, well, you know how proud she is. She'd hate to have anyone see her fall apart–– especially the crown princess."
Elena's eyes widened in understanding, "Oh–– that actually makes sense." She leaned in to kiss him on the cheek. "You are such a good son to be so considerate of her feelings."
"Thank you," he said softly as he held her closer.
–––––
Hours later, the Avaloran countryside rolled by as Mateo looked up from the swiftly moving carriage to the cerulean sky above, puffy white clouds scattered as far as the eye could see. It was such a peaceful sight, he wondered if the weather could possibly be any more at odds with the anxiety he felt building in his chest. He ran his hands through his hair, slumping against the bench seat of the royal carriage as it made its way to the moon cliffs, the base of which his mother's house was located.
He was still reeling from the discovery that Nicolás may be alive–– not only that, but there was a chance that they were about to go and retrieve him. He still didn't know if he even wanted to see the man, let alone invite him back into their lives.
The news had been shocking to say the least and he had no idea how his mother was going to react.
Mateo knew that in spite of everything that had happened so many years ago, though she had been a rock in his absence, losing her husband and raising a child alone had been hard on her. She missed Nicolás and still loved him deeply. Mateo had to tell her, but he worried about upsetting her and how everything would change–– if Nicolás came back.
Inhaling deeply through his nose, Mateo tried to ease his nerves, using the rhythm of the carriage wheels and the clip clopping of the horse's hooves as a calming focus. He still felt odd taking a royal carriage just to go visit his mother, but Elena had insisted. She said that as her fiancé, pretty much anything of hers was his to use as needed–– including the royal carriage. He had to admit that it was a rather long walk to the moon cliffs and there wasn't always a jaquin around to take him when he needed to go.
And then there was the fact that Mateo still could not ride a horse to save his life. He could ride Canela, but that was only because she was an unusual horse and was intentionally careful with him. She'd sort of adopted him because he belonged to her mistress. Any other horse and he couldn't even get himself into the saddle, let alone ride more than a few steps without falling off. Elena said he would have to learn eventually, but until then, he was content to ride behind her on Canela or take the royal carriage when he needed to be somewhere quickly.
Mateo was distracted from his musings as the carriage came to a stop in front of his mother's house. Thanking the driver, he climbed down and paused with his hand on the gate.
This is it, he thought, It's now or never.
Pushing it open, Mateo walked into the courtyard. It had been a few weeks since he'd last visited, but nothing had changed. The fountain still bubbled merrily in the center of the yard and cobblestones neatly lined the walkway leading to the back of the house. His favorite climbing tree from his childhood was as strong and tall as ever.
Mateo followed the walkway around and stopped. Rafa was standing at the clothesline–– her back to him–– hanging the wash out to dry. Clenching his fists at his side, Mateo took a deep, calming breath and called out as casually as he could, "Hey, Mami!"
Rafa paused to turn, beaming with delight at the sight of her son. "Mateo!" she cried, dropping the sheet she'd been wrestling with as she hurried over to where her son stood with a semi-forced smile plastered to his face. She threw her arms around him in a bone crushing hug. "I'm so happy you've finally come to see your old mami! I've missed you!"
Mateo laughed, returning the hug. "Wasn't the engagement party just two nights ago? We saw each other there!"
Releasing him, she shot him a mock glare, wagging a finger at him. "It's not the same thing as you coming home to visit me and you know it!"
Raising his hands before him in surrender, Mateo laughed again. "Ok! Ok! I'm sorry! I didn't mean anything by it. I'm here now, aren't I?"
Rafa's expression softened and she smiled, her eyes shining as she said, "Yes, mijo, you are. Come! Help me with this wash while you tell me everything that has been going on with you." She led the way back to the clothesline, gesturing to the basket of wet laundry and asked, "How is Elena?"
Picking up the sheet she'd dropped, Mateo said, "She's fine. Busy with crown princess stuff, you know. Nothing new there." He snapped the sheet expertly and draped it over the line, holding it so his mother could secure the clothespins.
"Mmm…" she replied, a clothespin between her teeth as she pinned one side and moved to the other. "That girl is quite industrious. You chose well, mijo. I couldn't have chosen better myself."
Blushing, Mateo pulled an apron from the basket, flicking it open as he said, "I'm just lucky she chose me too. You know, seeing as she's the crown princess and I'm–– well, she's the crown princess."
Snatching another clothespin from her pocket, Rafa raised a critical eyebrow at her son. "And you're, what, exactly?"
Huffing a sigh, he handed her the apron and reaching into the basket for the next article of clothing, said, "I'm nobody but a b––," he paused, looking down at the blouse in his hands, "I'm nobody important, not really. Especially compared to her. It's a miracle she picked me really."
Rafa was quiet, focusing on pinning the apron to the clothesline, a knot forming in her stomach. She knew what he'd been about to say. She knew the words that had haunted him since that fateful night so many years ago.
Nobody but a bastard child with nothing to his name.
It killed her to let him believe those awful words. She had been furious with Nicolás for even implying such an awful lie, but she understood the need and went along with it–– for Mateo's safety. For Nicolás hadn't been a wizard, no, he was a sorcerer–– he had magic in his blood. Had the guards believed Mateo to be of his blood, they would have taken him too.
The truth ate at her all of those years. She knew it still bothered Mateo that he believed he had been lied to about Nicolás' his entire life. She should have told him the truth the day Shuriki had been defeated, but couldn't bring herself to open those old wounds again. He had been so depressed for so long after the night Nicolás had been captured–– it had frightened her.
Her son had finally come to terms with what had happened and was finding his own path in the world. He had discovered his dream of becoming a wizard and had followed that dream. Now he was the royal wizard, like his grandfather before him. And had not only befriended, but was engaged to marry the future queen of Avalor.
Rafa was so proud of her son and what he'd become in spite of the adversity they'd faced. She couldn't tear those old wounds open. He'd found happiness and joy in spite of the pain and she worried it would shake his confidence and cause him to question himself–– who he was–– and he'd have to start over again.
On top of all of that, Mateo was the only one she had left in the entire world. She had no siblings. Her mother had passed away. Her father had likely passed away in his quest to free Princess Elena. Her husband was most likely dead. She only had her son. He was her world.
Every day that she didn't tell him the truth was another day she lived a lie, and admitting that–– well, she was terrified that it would cause a rift between them and if she were to lose him too?
She didn't want to think about what that might mean for her.
"Mijo," she said quietly, taking the blouse from him, "You are not a nobody. You are good and kind and you've accomplished the impossible–– in spite of awful circumstances–– all because of your strong will. And if this is about riches and power, I hope I've taught you better than to believe that material things make some people better than others. Because it's not true. And I know Princess Elena agrees with me."
Crossing his arms over his chest, almost as if to warm himself, Mateo turned away slightly, looking off into the distance as he said, "Yeah, I know."
Rafa watched him a moment and decided to let the topic go. Gesturing to the basket she said briskly, "Hand me that towel, please."
Mateo complied, shaking the towel out before handing it to his mother. He was quiet a moment, trying to decide how to tell his mother about the refugees. "Er–– Mami?"
"Hmm?"
"I also came to tell you that I'm going to be leaving in two weeks and I don't know how long I'll be gone."
This gave Rafa pause. Glancing sidelong at her son, she deftly arranged the towel on the clothesline before she said, "Oh? Is this royal wizard business? Or are you accompanying Elena on some other business? Or––"
"Actually, it's royal business. We're going to explore some uncharted islands north of Malvara. But Elena's put me in charge of organizing and leading this voyage. It's supposed to be a learning experience for when we're married and I'm helping her with royal business all the time."
Rafa's eyes lit up and she looked at Mateo, smiling proudly. "Really? My son? In charge of a royal expedition? What an honor! Your fa–– I mean, I am so proud, mijo! So, tell me everything. Why now? Why these islands? What are you looking for and how did you even hear about them?"
Mateo swallowed hard, hesitating before he said slowly, "Well, we had some unexpected guests at yesterday's grand council meeting. They are refugees who escaped and came to ask Elena for help rescuing others like them who are stuck on the islands."
Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, Rafa said, "Wait. Refugees? This is a rescue mission? What are refugees doing on uncharted islands and why are they asking the Avaloran princess for help?"
"Because they're Avalorans."
She cocked her head to one side, confused.
Taking a deep breath, Mateo took a step closer to his mother, placing his hands on her shoulders and looking her in the eyes before saying quietly, "They are prisoners, Mami. Shuriki's prisoners."
He could see the exact moment understanding clicked in her eyes. Rafa gasped, eyes wide. He flinched as her hands shot out, grasping his upper arms so tightly her knuckles turned white.
"Wait–– Does this mean–– Nicolás?" she breathed, desperately searching his eyes for the truth.
His throat tightened and was unable to form the words, so Mateo simply nodded. Rafa choked out a sob–– her knees buckling–– and fell to the ground.
Fear flooded his senses as his mother collapsed, but Mateo reacted quickly, catching her under her arms and lowering them both to the ground. His stomach knotted with worry and sadness as he watched his mother cover her face, her shoulders shaking with great, gasping sobs.
"Mami? Are–– are you ok?" He rubbed a comforting hand on her back, trying to decide how to best comfort her.
Her head snapped up, eyes rimmed with red, and she lunged, grasping the fabric around the neck of his wizard's robe. She stared fiercely into her precious son's face a moment before her expression crumpled and the tears continued to stream down her cheeks.
"Bring him back to me! Please, son! You must find him!" she begged, giving him a little shake. "Please! You must bring him back!"
Mateo didn't know what to say. "I–– I'll try. Of course I'll try, but––" he looked away, shoulders slumped, " ––but are you sure that's what you want?" he finished quietly.
"Of course it's what I want! Nicolás is my husband–– your father!"
"He's not my father!" Mateo snapped, anger and guilt and anxiety roiling inside him. "He's not! He's been gone for so long and if he comes back–– after everything that happened that night–– I––" Mateo's voice cracked, his eyes burning, his chest tight.
Rafa blinked, tears falling steadily, and reached out to cup his cheek. "Mateo," she said quietly, 'Mateo, look at me, mijo." His eyes flicked up to hers and she thought her heart would break at the hurt and pain she saw within. Had he bottled this up all these years?
"Mateo, regardless of what he said that night, Nicolás loves you." It was the best she could do, she just couldn't bring herself to tell him the whole story. She knew that if he found Nicolás, he would find out–– and if that happened? Well, she'd deal with it when the time came. If she was lucky, she and Nicolás would deal with it together.
Mateo stared at the ground, shaking his head, eyebrows furrowed as hurt and conflict joined the emotions warring within him. Rafa reached out and wrapped her arms around her son, drawing him into a hug. The tenderness of that gesture–– his mother's love–– was enough to break him.
All of the emotions that had been fighting for dominance for the past few days came rushing out and he clung to his mother as she clung to her son and they both cried.
He was still uncertain. And confused. And angry. And so many things when it came to Nicolás de Alva, but he desperately wanted to believe that, father or not, at least he, Mateo, had been loved and wanted.
And the two of them stayed like that until the tears ran out. Mateo took comfort in his mother's embrace. Rafa took comfort in her son's presence and his promise to do everything he could to bring her Nicolás home.
She was hopeful. After suffering ten years of pain, loneliness, fear and longing for her lost husband to return, Rafa had hope that he would finally be coming home to her. And she had faith that her brave, wonderful, capable son would be the one to make it happen
