I don't own marimite.
Rei's POV
Lillian Lesbian Squad
"Will you two stop making out back there, I'm getting jealous." I hear Sei shout back to us from the driver's seat. We've been driving for 3 straight hours and the need had become a little bit over powering. I pull away from Kanata and smile whilst licking my lips.
"You could let one of the others drive and join us." I say and get a lot of weird looks from everyone except Sei and Kanata.
"Rei...!" Yoshino squeaks and I smile languidly as I slide a fingertip down Kanata's cheek.
"What... Don't tell me you all think it's that bad?" I say and they all nod except Sei and Kanata who shake their heads in disagreement.
"Are you all lesbians?" Lily-Chan asks in such a small voice that I barely hear her. Sei is laughing so hard that I think she might just crash if she doesn't calm down.
"Yes Lily-Chan we are all lesbians. It sort of comes with the student council. I think it has something to do with the name." Sei struggles to get her giggles under control and I'm laughing now.
"With the name?" Aurora-Chan looks so confused it's sweet.
"Yama-Yuri-Kai." I pronounce it out for her and the youngest blush like there's no tomorrow. Even Yumi and Shimako look a little pink in the cheeks.
"We aren't all gay." Yoshino argues and I laugh at her.
"Yeah right... They might as well just name the Yamayurikai... Lillian's Lesbian squad." I laugh and Sei breaks harshly as she starts laughing uncontrollably. A car screeches past us beeping its horn as the driver shakes his fist but Sei is too busy holding her stomach with one arm and wiping her tears away with the other hand. Her reaction just serves to make me and Kanata laugh harder.
"I'm sure Eriko would love to know that you think she's gay." Yoshino growls at me and I stick my tongue out at her.
"Eriko isn't allowed to be a lesbian. I think I might have to hang myself if Deko chin ever starts loving ladies." Sei says as she calms down and turns back to look at us after putting her hazard lights on.
"I thought you'd never top yourself." I said smugly and she grins.
"There is no way back up once Eriko turns. It might as well be the apocalypse for the rest of our breed." She jokes and me and Kanata laugh at her. The others just sit there wondering what she is jabbering on about.
"So Eriko isn't a lesbian, but the rest of you are." Sei says and Yoshino shakes her head.
"I'm not gay."
"Says the one that's in love with her cousin." Yumi laughs at Yoshino's angry face and jumps over the seats to sit next to Sei so she doesn't get attacked. Lily-Chan squeaks as Yumi lands on her lap. It's a good job we rented out the mini bus thing; otherwise there wouldn't be enough room for all of us.
"Yumi-Sama." Lily-Chan whines at her Onee-Sama.
"You try sitting next to her." Yumi laughs and pats Lily-Chan's head.
"Right let's get this discussion over and done with so we can carry on driving without Sei trying to kill us as much. Yoshino is greedy, Eriko is straight, Youko is greedy and the rest of us are about as straight as a round about."
"What about Aurora-Chan and me?" Lily-Chan asks and we all look at them. They are both blushing at the attention.
"That would be Aurora-Chan and I." Yumi corrects her and the younger girl nods as Yumi pats her head.
"It depends, on how you see your relationship with your Onee-Samas." Sei says in answer to Lily-Chan's question and we all watch them as Aurora-Chan turns even redder and Lily-Chan pulls a face.
"She's my big sister." Lily-Chan says and Aurora-Chan stays quiet and faces the front of the van. If she gets any redder her ears are going to give off steam. Poor Yoshino doesn't look as if she knows what to make of the situation and as always she gets angry instead of thinking clearly.
"Damn it why did you have to bring this subject up?" She growls and looks straight at me as if it's my fault.
"So the girl has a crush on you, who cares Yoshi. There's no need to become irritated about it. Jeez you so need to learn how to deal with these things." I grumble at her.
"Rei's right, you're over reacting to it. She'll be over her crush before too long. Not many people can handle having a crush on such a hot headed, irritable, rose." Sachiko finally pipes up from where she's been laid on one of the seats since we set off. She really doesn't travel well and that goes double when Sei's the one that's driving.
"It's good to see you're still alive." Yoshino grits her teeth and turns away from us.
"Aww is little Yoshi-Chan sulking with us now?" I stick out my bottom lip and she turns around with her hand out flat. I don't think fast enough and the open hand comes to a stop with a stinging slap to my cheek.
"I hate you." She growls, I grit my teeth as I put my hand to my cheek and feel the heat. We sit here staring at each other and the anger that is bouncing between us is almost visible. Kanata gets up and walks down the isle to sit on Sei's lap whilst everyone else watches us as if they expect world war three to erupt.
"Well?" She goads me and I start to smile through my clenched teeth.
"Do you honestly think I'd get angry at you for being a silly child?" I say it as a growl and her eyes widen.
"Have a word with yourself would you because you're yanking on my chain and I really don't want to hit you." I look her over before going to the front of the mini bus.
"Lily-Chan, Aurora-Chan, Yumi-Chan; will you please move to the back of the bus so I can stick my head out of the window?" I ask and the three of them scatter. I sit down and wind down the window as I take out my cigarettes and light one.
"You smoke now?" Sachiko, Shimako and Yumi-Chan blurt out but I choose to ignore them as Kanata lies on the seat next to me with the back of her head rested on my thighs. Sei gets the bus moving again and everyone seems to slip into a depressing silence. Sei looks infuriated and she's clenching her teeth as if she is trying to keep her mouth shut. It's probably my fault. If Yoshino hadn't reacted that way then I wouldn't be angry with her. Why can't she just grow up? Kanata reaches up and takes the cigarette out of my hand before smoking it herself. She only gets to smoke a bit of it before Sei slides her hand up Kanata's leg to take it off of her. She sits there with one hand on the wheel and the other hanging out of the open window. She only pulls it in when she wants to take a drag off of the cigarette. She's going to end up with one arm red and the other as pail as it usually is.
"Okay, see, this is just weird." Noriko pipes up and we all turn to look at her.
"Sei-Sama, keep your eyes on the road." Yumi squeals and Sei does as she is told.
"Go on Noriko. What's weird?" I ask and she waves her hand at the three of us.
"Are you three all sleeping with each other?" She asks and my jaw drops.
"Noriko...!" Shimako would have barked it at her if she was less of a lady. Instead it comes out as a gentle warning.
"And there was me thinking that the students of Lillian were meant to be ladies. You lot are as bad as the students at the public school I used to go to." Kanata smiles down at me and I smile back at her.
"Some of us are ladies. Then some of us turn out like Rei, Yoshino and Noriko." Sachiko says from where she's laid on one of the seats.
"So are you all sleeping with each other?" Noriko persists with the matter.
"No." I say and Sei laughs at me. I shoot her a warning glance but she isn't looking at me so she doesn't see it.
"At least, not at the same time." She says and I stare out of the side window just to ignore the looks that the others were giving us. Even Sachiko has sat up to see what's going on.
"Sei-Sama have you and Rei been together?" Yumi asks and my face turns so red I think there is steam coming out of my ears.
"A few times... Why do you want some too?" Sei asks and this time she catches the look I'm giving her.
"If looks could kill Rei I'd be dead and you'd be heading towards that wall at 50mph." She grins and wiggles her eyebrows at me. Why can't I stay angry at her? I turn my head to look at Yumi who looks a little bit distraught and give her a weak smile as I try to think of what to say to her.
"Alcohol is the evil spawn of Satan." I say to her and she now looks confused and disgusted.
"We were stupidly drunk and one thing lead to another." I say in a low voice.
"A few times." Sei says and I shoot her the look again.
"Why do you have to be so honest?" I ask her and she shrugs.
"I don't see the point in lying to people about something so trivial. Are you and Kanata a couple now?" She asks and I look down at Kanata. She shakes her head saying no and I shrug.
"What's the point in getting tied down?" I ask Sei and she nods with a grin.
"Good because I was in bed with her last night." She laughs and I laugh with her as Kanata blushes.
"You two have never been ladies." She says as she tries to cover her face and her embarrassment.
"We always knew that Sei was a pervert but I don't think any of us knew that you were a slut Rei." Yoshino says and my back straightens at her words. Where the fuck did that come from? Does she want to ruin our friendship so much that we can never get it back? I won't rise to it. I won't say anything back to her. I don't have to. So why is my mouth opening?
"Sei pull over." I say and she looks at me. She looks so pissed off I think she might explode.
"Pull over." I repeat it and she does as I say.
"Get out." I say to Yoshino and she stands up with an angry glair on her face. She gets out of the side door and I follow after her. I pace back and forth wondering, what I should say to her. I don't know why she is pushing me like this. We have had a good day. We even had a sickly sweet moment when we were getting our photos taken; so why the hell is she being this nasty to me? I turn to her and see that she is still looking just as angry with me.
"What...?" She asks and I sigh as I rub my sinuses. I'm getting a major headache from all of this stress.
"Why Yoshi...?" I ask her.
"Why are you being like this with me? What is it that is making you this horrid? None of my private life has anything to do with you and if it irritates you, you should ignore it. I don't want to fall out with you." I say and she remains just as angry. She doesn't talk to me. She just stands there glairing at me as if I'm in the wrong. She's the one that called me a slut.
"Talk to me Yoshi." I say and she turns to get back in the bus. I pin her where she is and hit my fist against the wall of the bus. It was so very nearly her face and I can't stand myself right now. I'd feel horrid if I'd actually hit her.
"Don't walk away from me damn it. We are going to talk about this and get to the truth of it because I'm sick of you turning on me like that." I growl at her and the fear in her eyes knocks me off guard. I don't want to scare her. I want her to talk to me. I want her to be honest with me. I look up to see the others looking down at us through the window with shocked looks on their faces but I don't care. The only thing on my mind is Yoshino and why she hates me.
"I don't understand you." She whispers and I look back down at her. Her beautiful eyes are sad and filled with tears that are yet to fall down her cheeks.
"You don't understand me? Yoshi... I'm the one that doesn't understand you. I've done nothing but be nice to you. You're the one that slapped me. You're the one that called me that disgusting name. I was only playing around earlier and you hit me for it." I say and she closes her eyes as she turns her head away from me.
"Talk to me. Please Yoshi..." I whisper as I touch her cheek.
"Why can't you see what you're doing to me Rei? You sleep with all of those strangers. You even sleep with Sei... Why aren't I good enough for you?" She whispers and my heart breaks in half as her tears fall. She's jealous? She promised me that she wouldn't get jealous. Is she really in love with me that much? My fist is still clenched against the metal of the bus and I only just start to realise that it's hurting. I take it away and unclench it to see that the skin has been cleaved up my knuckles. It's bleeding a little but I don't care because right now Yoshino's pain is hurting me more.
"I can't do that to you Yoshino." I whisper.
"Why not...? What is so repulsive about me that you can't love me?"
"I do love you but it isn't like that. You don't repulse me. You just have to know that I have been there all of your life, I have watched you grow up and get stronger and I can't take your innocence from you because you're my little angel." I whisper to her. Her chest shudders as she puts her hands to her face and squelches the sob that barely makes its way out of her. I pull her into my arms and she flings her arms around me as she cries against my chest. I can't stand her being like this. I don't want to cause her this much pain.
"All I can do is to make sure you don't see or hear about it, but will that make it any better for you?" I ask her and she shakes her head.
"Well then what do you want me to do Yoshi? I can't do what you want of me." I say. I can't love her like that, and I can't forget my emotions to make her happy because I'm not like Sei. She is the most important thing in the world to me but I can't forget my happiness for hers. I've always done that and I can't do it anymore.
"I want you to stay away from me." She says and pulls away from me. She walks to get into the van and I just stand there. I turn my back on the van and light another cigarette as I ache from the inside out. Why does it hurt like this? I'm attracted to Kanata to the point where it could get to love if we want it to. I like Sei to the extent that I actually like the drunken nights we spend together. So why is my heart aching like this at the prospect of Yoshino not wanting to be near me? She makes me so angry sometimes and other times she just makes me want to hug her for hours. She's my cousin though and I can't love her like that... can I? Not my cousin... or my petit soeur... What about my little angel? I sit down on the grass verge and cover my head with my left arm as I smoke my cigarette. Why am I in turmoil like this? I just want to be happy. If I can't be happy without Yoshino and making her happy won't do anything for me... What the hell am I meant to do? I see a pair of feet enter my vision but I don't look up. I know whose shoes they are and I can't face her. She's always been a real lady and I've just dragged my name down. I know who I want right now and the fact that I want her just chucks another load of questions into my head. I want my best friend to make it better?
"Rei... Why did you never come to me for advice? We're meant to be friends." Sachiko says as she sits down at my side.
"You wouldn't understand Sachiko." I say to her and she grumbles at me.
"I understand that you got sick of acting like a lady. I know you went to the extremes to get out of being just that." She says and I choke on a laugh.
"Would you like to know what I think?" She asks and I turn my head to look at her sophisticated face.
"You're denying what you feel for Yoshino. You think that you can't love her because she's your cousin." She says and I grumble again.
"And these things..." She takes my cigarette off of me takes a drag and then passes it back to me. I'm sure I hear Yumi squeak her name out but I don't care.
"Make your breath stink like an ashtray."
"I'm not hiding from my feelings about Yoshino. Maybe someone else, but not Yoshino." I whisper almost totally to myself. You're the perfect lady, you aren't meant to know about these things Sachiko." I say and she gives me a smile.
"I never wanted to be anything but an ordinary girl. I'd love to have gone to a public school." She says and I smile at her.
"It's amazing how little we actually know about each other." I say to her and she nods. Even her nod is sophisticated.
"I guess we just get caught up in our own things that we blank out the people near us. I think Sei is the only one that knows all of us, and I really hate to admit that. I owe her a lot even though I probably won't ever be able to pay her back." She says and I smile at her.
"I don't know what I'm doing Sachiko. I like the way my life is, and I was happy before Yoshino started hurting. I know deep down that I don't love her like that. I'm not hiding from any emotions at all when Yoshino is concerned. I just don't know how to make everyone happy."
"You can't make everyone happy because the stress will make you unhappy. Kanata says that you aren't a couple so why can't you just be with Yoshino as well?" She asks me and I give her a disbelieving look.
"That wouldn't be right of me to do Sachiko. If I get with Yoshi-Chan then I have to only be with Yoshi-Chan. She gets jealous and she wants a real relationship; like life long marriage type thing. I'm too young for that, she's too young for that. She has to live her life before she gets into something so... Oh I don't know. She's only fifteen Sachiko." My voice becomes a whisper.
"So's Yumi, but I'm willing to give up everything for her."
"I wouldn't. You don't know if it's going to last Sachiko. First loves don't work like that. Don't you wonder what it will be like to be with other women?"
"If I'm honest, before Yumi I didn't think about other women. The way we are together... I can be with her without needing to push it further. I mean I do want that but, I don't need it."
"Believe me, when you finally get around to it you will need it. Your relationship was always innocent. You've only just admitted to each other how you feel so it's bound to be a little weird for a time. Can you honestly see yourself not being with anyone else for the rest of your life? You're almost 17 and you have so many years in front of you. How can you be sure that you won't fall for somebody else?"
"I can't be sure, but right now she is the one that I want to be with."
"Right now I want to be with Kanata and Sei and any other woman that I take a fancy to. I don't want to be tied down and I honestly don't think that I can be anything but Yoshino's cousin. She's my innocent little Yoshi-Chan, I can't do that to her."
"You just have to trust that she knows what she wants." Sachiko says and I wonder if she is actually listening to what I'm saying to her. It doesn't matter if Yoshino knows what she wants. I don't know what I want and I can't give her that hope when I could end up breaking her heart worse than what it is right now. I get to my feet as I throw the cigarette away and hold my hand out to Sachiko.
"Come on I think Sei wanted to get to Youko's before it gets dark." I say and she slides her hand into mine. I'm surprised at how dainty her hand is in mine and how smooth it feels. Mine are a little rough because I'm always training at the dojo and doing chores. Ever Kanata's hands aren't this soft and she's a beautician. I think I hold her hand for a little bit too long and she starts to look edgy so I let her go and smile gently as I let her get into the mini bus first. I sit on my own at the back of the bus because everyone else is crowding at the middle and chatting away as if they hadn't heard anything. Yoshino is sat on her own looking out of the right window and seeing her makes me ache. I take out my mobile and text her... Please enjoy yourself little angel. I don't know what the future holds for us so please try to have fun for now.
I think that she will listen to me even if she hates me right now. I want to mean something more than just a first love... What am I talking about? I don't know what I want to mean to her, but if I do want to be something more to her in the future then... I just want her to enjoy herself whilst she's young. She shouldn't be tied down at her age. Sachiko has sat down at the front of the mini bus between Sei and Kanata and I think she's talking to Sei. I just keep getting amazed today. Sachiko and Sei had always had a bit of a strained relationship. I think it had started because Sachiko knows how Youko feels about the white rose; it carried on though because of Sei's advances on Yumi. I think Sachiko sees it as; she has no need to worry about it anymore. She hasn't had to fight for it, and even the solution to her wedding has been handed to her by the woman she thought she had to keep an eye on. I look to my side a little shocked when Aurora sits at my side and gives me a weak smile. The girl is so quiet that I think Shimako and Yoshino got the wrong Petite soeurs.
"Rei-Sama..." She whispers and I keep eye contact with her. If she wants to talk to me then I'll let her. I'm not one to dash what little confidence she has.
"How come you're able to get so many people to like you?" She asks and I smile.
"I let them see something that I'm not. I act like the worlds most confident self assured person when really I'm not."
"But shouldn't you let people see who you really are? I like who you really are." She whispers and I smile. She's so sweet it's cute and she keeps blushing as if she's embarrassed about talking.
"I have no need for the women to know who I am. I'm not interested in them for any more than a few hours, so why would they need to know me personally? I can't even remember half of their names." I admit and she nods.
"And Yoshino does know the real you?" She asks and I nod.
"She knows everything about me. She could probably identify every scar on my body to what caused it. She doesn't like who I am right now though."
"But she still loves you."
"I wish she didn't. It would make my life a lot easier. Do me a favour Aurora-Chan." I say and she nods her head. She doesn't even know what I'm going to ask her and she's so trusting.
"Don't get an idea in your head of idyllic first loves. They don't exist. First loves serve to tear your heart out and make you see the world clearly. Enjoy yourself Aurora-Chan."
"I thought Yoshino-Sama said that Sei was the depressing one." Is she having a joke at my expense? This girl is quite the misleading young charmer.
"I'm sorry but you can see how Yoshino is suffering right now and how it's making me hurt."
"I think that I will be happy to be fall in love. Mistakes are there to make a person grow stronger."
"Memories give me the strength I need to proceed." I whisper as I'm reminded of the quote. I don't even know where I'd heard it before. Maybe a song I've heard or one of my many books. I wonder if she is trying to teach me something.
"I thought that you loved her." I say and she blushes like a maniac.
"I... No I don't... She's my best friend and my Onee-Sama but that is all she will ever be. I admire her and look up to the strength she has. I'm only 14 Rei-Sama. I'm not old enough for anything more than that. When I am old enough I intend to enjoy myself until I do fall in love." She smiles and I grin at her.
"I should talk to you more often. You seem to have your head screwed on right." I say and she blushes again. It's so sweet. I wrap my arms around her and kiss the top of her head before standing up. Okay then, I need a new wave of motivation. I'm going to let Yoshino have her own way and allow her to ignore me. I jump onto Kanata's lap and she huffs at me as I put my legs across Sachiko.
"Are you and your cousin sorted?" Kanata asks and I pull a face.
"No but it doesn't matter. As long as nobody makes a move on me when she's around then nobody has to worry about loosing a limb, or two." I smile at her.
"So why are you sat on me? I don't want to die." She says and I shake my head at her.
"Don't worry about it."
Sei's POV
Love is the cause of hate
I hate the girl. I well and truly hate her and I have never thought anything so harshly about one of my fellow roses; but Yoshino? I hate what she is doing to Rei, and the way Rei always lets her get away with it. How can Rei still want to be her friend after the way the young girl has treated her? She slaps her around and calls her disgusting names? She makes me sick. That isn't love and that will never be love. She wants to own Rei and get her to do as she says. If she loved Rei at all she would back off and let her live her own life. I hate her!
I look up slightly as Sachiko gets to her feet and Kanata follows her so that they can go sit with Yumi and swap stories about me. That should be interesting for them. I just hope that Kanata keeps it strictly PG13 for the kid's sake. I look across at Rei and I see that the hand print is still visible on her cheek. My anger boils up and I turn back to the windscreen so that she can't see it. I know that she knows how I feel though.
"What are you angry about Sei? It isn't you she just pulled to pieces." She whispers and I sink back into the seat. I turn to look at her. She's looking at her knuckles and the skin that has been pushed up them.
"It might has well have been." I whisper to myself as I avoid eye contact with her.
"Does anyone want a break to stretch their legs?" I shout back and most of them say yes. I pull off of the road and into a small service station before turning the engine off.
"Go on then. Make sure to use the toilets because I don't intend on stopping between here and Youko's." I say and they all get off of the bus. Rei goes to stand up but I pull her into my lap and hold onto her.
"You aren't going anywhere just yet." I say and she just leans into my hold as if it is all that she needs. I hope that it is all that she needs for now, because I'm not very good in situations like this.
"Why didn't you come outside when Yoshino came back in?" She asks me and I feel trapped. I force my words out of me though.
"Well... because I might have hurt Yoshino when I walked past her. You might think that I don't have a right to be angry but I hate the way she treats you. She talks about you as if you're worthless behind your back and then she slaps you and calls you ugly names and she expects us to believe that's love? I know love Rei. I know every inch of it and you don't treat people you love like that." I say and she turns to lean her head on my shoulder.
"I know Sei but what am I meant to do about it? I promised when I was really young that I would be there for her no matter what. I can't back out of that promise." She says and I admire her more than ever. That is why she puts up with it; because of a promise she made when she was young? How honourable does she need to be?
"I don't know what you should do to be honest. I just want you to be okay. If she carries on being like this Rei; I can't promise that I will be able to keep quiet. You might have an obligation to protect her, but you're my best friend, and I will defend you to no end." I whisper.
"Thank you." She says as she holds onto me. I almost told her that I love her. It would be so easy for it to just slip out. I don't want to complicate this anymore for her though so I bite my tongue and just content myself with holding her. It's amazing what the simple things will do for me. She wiggles a little and bites her lip with a blush on her cheeks and I grin like an idiot.
"What's up?" I ask and she blushes redder.
"I need the loo." She says and I laugh at her as I let her go. She kisses me on the cheek before running out of the mini bus. I put my hand to my cheek as my eyes waver shut and revel in the feeling of her lips. I keep the feeling inside me instead of pushing it away as I get off of the bus. I just step out of it when Sachiko grabs my arm and drags me around the back of the bus.
"Sa-Chan...?" I ask and she places a finger to my lips.
"I'm a Chinensis Sei, and I notice everything. I know who you are in love with, and there is only one thing I have to say to you about it." Sachiko looks angry and I'm just stood here in shock. If she tells me to back off from Rei I'm going to cry.
"Look after her Sei, because I don't think she can handle what Yoshino is doing to her on her own." She says and I slump back against the van.
"Who else knows?" I ask her and she smiles.
"Yumi, Shimako and myself are the only ones as far as I know. I'd be a bit more subtle about it if I were you, unless you want Youko seeing it." She advises me and I smile.
"How did you know?"
"You practically shouted it out with that glare of yours when Yoshino was bad mouthing her. Just look after her Sei." Is she pleading with me?
"You have my word. Now if you don't mind I need to use the facilities." I smile and she nods. I have to run now because my bladder is aching. I never was one for holding it in. Rei is just exciting the toilets when I run in.
"Watch it Sei." She laughs at my red expression.
"Sorry, I'm dying here." I shout back as I lock the cubicle door and plonk myself down.
R&R
