Disclaimer: don't own this... I'm getting tired of disclaimers.

note: i'm not sure exactly how I feel about writing this, but it was bound to come up. this is my first time, so bear with me. and don't get too excited, it's not too explicit.

no, I haven't died. I'm back with another chapter so, drumroll please...

Chapter 7- Love & Life

Once his eyes held her, Xena couldn't look away. Even as he drew his face closer to her, his icy breath on her lips, she couldn't look away. It was the anticipation that made hot and cold flames spark across her sweat moistened skin. She couldn't think; it was instinct that made her hand reach up Kurda's neck and into his thick ebony strands of hair, granting him permission. What came first was just the feel of his soft, full lips on her own, they didn't press, they didn't move. Xena closed the kiss further, letting him know she was fine. In the next second, he had captured her bottom lip, slightly pulling, and then pushing back. She couldn't break from him, not while his mouth was still locked to hers, caressing her lips. She lost herself, drowning in his love so deeply, she came up gasping for air when he at last broke the kiss.

Her cheeks reddened and she put a few feet in between them. Kurda still stared at her intensely. She sat up, turning her back, but feeling his eyes burning holes in her back, she stood upright, walking away from him. Kurda still lay motionless and comfortable; he continued to gaze at her with love saturated in his face as Xena stood by the glass door leading out onto the small balcony. She pressed her face against it, the blood pulsing in her veins calming to a lazy lull.

She didn't turn around. She didn't hear him come behind her. She only felt his taut chest against her tense back, gentle hands coaxing her shoulders to fall and relax. His lips were at her ear, his chilling breath whispering vows of love and life, of a future reflected in his romance. "We exchanged promises of revolution. These distorted and black times will change into ideals, into dreams. One day, I will show you a brilliant world."

She rememebered that promise, the one they had sealed that night on the lonely chateau, but she avoided speaking of it. Instead she watched the sky. "The sun is almost finished setting. It would do it no justice to watch it from behind a door."

Kurda spoke to her mirrored image in the glass. "No sunset nor sunrise shines with the same radiance of your beautiful face." Nonetheless, he moved to slide open the door and followed her out. He watched her sigh heavily and the sunlight bounce off her skin as fireworks would inside convex glass. Yet, it was only in Kurda's eyes that she was this cinematic; beauty was the ideal, but few knew what that ideal of beauty was. He knew though.

Twilight slowly overtook the scarlet tinges in the sky and seeped amethyst and indigo into the colors, running them all together for a moment that would last longer than a picture that never began to mimic a sight seen through autistic eyes. As the painting drew closer to monochrome, Xena faced Kurda again, standing exactly as she had left him. There was an omniscient vibe about him all the time and even his countenance conveyed eloquence. At times he made her feel discarnate and that there were only thoughts, but she would look down to see hands, her own hands, threaded in his and realize that she was in fact attached to a body, regardless of how ethereal it felt.

Her trance broke when he turned to step back inside. Her uncertainty made her actions impulsive-- her shaking arms circled his skinny waist and her lips were pressed between his sharp shoulder blades. Her arms tightened to stop the nervouse bouts of epilepsy in them. They steadied at once when Kurda pried her hands loose, allowing him enough room to face her again and then brought them to his face. His lips were impossibly soft on her fingers, her palms, her wrists, lingering where he felt her pulse, kissing the life in her. Xena moved her hands down to his strong shoulder, slid them down his smooth chest, all the way down to the sensitive skin of his navel and finally rested on his belt buckle. Kurda exhaled huskily, bringing his hands to her thighs and feeling upwards, catching Xena's sigh in an innocent kiss. He lifted her, her legs straddling his waist, thier kisses becoming more desperate, almost crushing, losing the patience they'd begun with. Then Xena's need to breathe presented a problem, interrupting their seemingly drug induced passion. Kurda set her back on her feet, but she swayed into him, wanting more. The cold air cleared his head temporarily, slowing down the colors he had been hearing and the sounds he had been seeing in his addiction. He didn't want it to end out there on the cold balcony; he wanted a stronger dosage. Hooking his thumbs in her empty belt loops, Kurda pulled her towards the bed. He handled her like a glitter adorned ice figurine, laying her down as if she'd melt or break right before his eyes.

Suddenly gripped by this foolish fear, Kurda made a conscience effort to control his emotions, especially when they forced themselves against constraints. Kurda lifted the hem of her shirt slowly and deliberately bringing his mouth to her skin. Each kiss fell as lightly as a snowflake, sizzling into steam from the escalated body heat. The coolness of his lips momentarily relieved some of the heat, but the touch replaced the warmth with scorching fire. This continued until the shirt was removed completely, and her jeans followed shortly afterwards. Before he could do more, she was already unbuckling his belt and pulling his boxers down with his jeans at the same time Kurda undid the clasp of her bra, freeing her breasts, exposing her to him.The bra joined the pile of their other discarded clothes. The last garment was the black spandex shorts, already being pulled off by Kurda.

At last both gasped at each other's nakedness, reveling in each other's exposure, appreciating each other's beauty before Kurda moved between her legs, fingers trailing up the inside of her thighs, one hands wrapping around her neck, the other holding her breast. She could feel the raised scar on his right hand as he fondled her lovingly. Xena let her own hands roam, feeling the hard muscles in hsi back and reaching into silky hair once he'd dipped his head to let his tongue roll around her nipples, nipping lightly. Involuntarily, her hips jerked upwards, bumping painfully against Kurda's pulsating groin. He gritted his teeth and a low growl came from him. Foreplay abruptly came to end as Xena continued to press her hips against his, grasping his waist. Kurda held her hips tightly in places, slowly going into her, filling her completely and perfectly. A moan escaped Xena's throat and she was amazed that the sound had come from her. She'd begun to bleed, the scent reaching Kurda's nose and from then on, his modalities mixed. He heard her moans and heavy breathing, but saw pleasure and pain on Xena's face, though his eyes were closed. Xena felt his rythmic thrusting, but registered only the smell of sweat rolling down Kurda's forehead. It was as if suddenly being afflicted with synesthesia. It was marvelous and murderous, but it was an affliction they would not do without.Their excitement heightened with their sensuality until finally they reached the apex and both sank into the bed, Kurda wonderfully heavy on Xena's exhausted body.

As the gasping breaths subsided, there was a whispered "I love you," in Kurda's ear. She playfully bit his earlobe, and smiled into his neck. Kurda's voice came muffled, "How much?"

"If the world lies on the balance between love and life, then I'll abandon all my pride and bring you love."

Kurda rolled onto his side and propped himself onto his elbow, scrutinizing her. "Are you sure? Pride is a powerful thing to give up, especially in your family."

Xena ran the back of her hand across Kurda's cheek as she answered, "I want these words to make thing right, but..."

"But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life," Kurda finished for her. He sighed contentedly. "Xena, I wanted so desperately for you to love that I neglected to see if you had any inkling as to how much I love you." His voice dropped dangerously. "I am your iron fist with a silken palm. Your cold fortress that keeps you warm. I continue to exist for you alone. I have no other reason for being."

Xena pushed his hair from his face again and smiled up at his marble face. "For tonight, just be my lover."


CREDITS

"We exchanged promises of revolution. These distorted and black times will change into ideals, into dreams. One day, I will show you a brilliant world" are translated from a jrock song called "The World" by the band Nightmare

"ideal beauty" is deviated from a quote by Fyodor Dostoevsky

"I want these words to make thing right, but it's the wrongs that make the words come to life." Fall Out Boy "Thanks for the Memories."

"If the world lies on the balance between love and pride, then I'll abandon all my pride and bring you love" Carlos Santana "Satellite"