After seeing such a horrible breakfast, eggs, I nearly had a heart-attack as I hid in my closet corner. The way I usually calm down is going through my awesome homemade magazines I made of _ and masturbate at the same time. But I was too scarred from the dreaded sight of frying eggs to do anything but sit in the closet. Alone. With the lights off. My hand trembled as it clung to the front of my shirt as I stared into the darkness in silence. Fritz, may you watch over those poor unborn baby chicks…

_ opened the closet, "It's very hot today! Don't you want to go swimming before going back to school tomorrow?"

Beach=Almost naked awesome girlfriend. Almost naked awesome girlfriend=Sexy. Sexy=AWESOME! "Let's go!" I shouted while jumping up to my feet.

Of course, Ludwig didn't want to go. He'd prefer staying home and reading the newspaper than looking like the sexy beast he can be. So my awesome girlfriend decided to UNDRESS my brother and put swimming trunks on him. Saying that since he was at such a young age, it didn't matter what she saw. Now that just pissed off my awesomeness! _ didn't do that to me! THEN _ put Ludwig over her shoulder and stuffed him in the car, saying that she would buy ice cream later. It wasn't fair one bit!

I was ready to burst a cap until Alfred, Arthur, and Matthew came over to join us. Apparently my girlfriend called Alfred to tell him about our beach trip and asked if they could be a part of it. As if I wanted to be stuffed in a (vehicle name) with those guys! It was ridiculous! I'd rather be in school than here! Which is quite strange actually.

"ONWARD! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Holding Arthur's hand, Alfred ran towards the water as if there was a pile of burgers waiting for him.

Irritable Ludwig sat at under the beach umbrella with my awesome girlfriend and Matthew to make a sandcastle together. His irritation began to leave though since she didn't seem so afraid to interact with him. A sign that the "child issue" is becoming better. I believe it's still a problem since they left me out.

So I was left alone feeling like an idiot with my arm floaties and a rope tied around my waist. I knew I couldn't swim but I didn't want the whole public to know! _ and I had a private beach we normally went to, I don't know why we came here! Gilbird wasn't fond of other people either; at least HE agreed with the fact we should've went to the private beach.

Alfred grinned, "Just one?"

"No! Bugger off!" Arthur splashed water at the American before storming back towards shore.

Until Alfred splashed a load of water back.

Furious, Arthur spun around.

"Ha ha…Oh shit, bro."

Using magic, the Brit formed a giant bubble of water over Alfred's head and let it fall on him. Satisfied, Arthur turned away until he was tackled into the water by his lover. Both equally drenched afterwards…

"_! _! _! ALFRED UN ARTHUR KISSED OUT IN ZHE VATER!"

My girlfriend looked up at me until she was tackled back into the sand by me. "Gilbert! What are you talking about?"

"Kissing…USUK…I support it…" I collapsed on her chest, preventing her from getting up. Oh thank Fritz she's wearing a bikini…

"Alright…As long as it's not intense-"

"I say it is quite a show if Matthew's blushing."

Suddenly I was tossed aside and _ dashed towards the water. "ALFRED F. JONES! IF YOU TOUCH ARTHUR THERE I'LL HAVE YOU GROUNDED FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!"

"BUT I WANT TO KNOW WHAT BIG BEN IS LIKE!"

I knew by the sound of splashing water that she had tackled Alfred.

By the time we came home, without those extra idiots, we had to take showers to get rid of the beach-water and smell. To save some water, _ decided it'd be awesome if Ludwig and I took a shower together. Together. TOGETHER! HOLY FRITZ! I wanted to share a shower with my awesome girlfriend but not him! Ever! It's not like I wish to see his junk or his tiny tits when I could see some very nice…Kesesesese! But that's not what _ wished to happen so I had to be forced into the shower with stone-faced Ludwig in one bathroom.

Naked.

Wow…Just…Not close to awesome…My brother had the tiniest-

"Stop looking at me, bruder!" Ludwig snapped.

"Kesesesesese! Jealous?" I soaped my five meters with a sly grin on my awesome face, which caught my brother's attention. He reddened when he realized that I had planned for him to do such a thing~

"S-shut up! At least I've got something vorthy compared to your stick."

"It's not a stick! Just look un vatch!"

"Nein!"

"You just wish Feliciano gave you pleasure vith five meters just like mine!"

Angrily Ludwig glared at me, "Don't bring Feli into zhis!"

"COME AT ME, BRO!"

(Your POV)

As I was taking a shower, the sounds of arguing between two German brothers could be heard. I let out an annoyed sigh and cleared the shampoo out of my hair. They have been at this for some time now when it came to who had a bigger…Thing than the other if Feliciano Vargas was involved. Not surprising one bit.

But…

Gilbert joined me in the shower, "He can't get me now!"

"GILBERT!"

Ludwig stomped outside of the shower, "Get out here!" He ordered.

"I don't vant to see your ugly face-Oh hello zhere breasts! I haven't seen your awesome titties in a vhile~"

My face reddened in anger and embarrassment to see little Gilbert looking up at me with a smile. I shakily put my hand on his face so that I didn't have to see it, "That's better…"

"_, may I touch zhem?"

"N-no!"

He moved my hand away, his large red eyes full of fake innocence, "Please?"

"You are disgusting!" Ludwig shouted before slamming the door shut behind him.

"Gil, I already said no!"

"Awwwwww…" Gilbert pouted, and then touched his own tits, "So vhat do you zhink?"

"I think you're a sick pervert."

"Actually, I'm quite healthy! I've been to school every single day, un I take good care of my body to do so!"

"By masturbating!"

"…Kesesesese, you know it!"

Later that day…

"SHE'S MY CHEERY PIE! COOL DRINK OF WATER SUCH A SWEET SURPRISE! TASTE SO GOOD MAKE A GROWN MAN CRY! SWEET CHEERY PIE, YEAH!" Gilbert sang.

I cracked open my bedroom door to see my boyfriend dressed only in sweatpants while playing air-guitar on my bed. On the dresser, his boombox was blasting Cherry Pie by Warrant, enough that I could hear it from outside as I worked in my garden to relieve the stress of teaching. He liked to do head-bangs so that his smooth white hair flipped up and down in its' own sexy way. Jumping around on the bed, enjoying himself…It made me happy. A child in my home putting a smile on my face!

"HUH! SWINGIN' IN ZHE LIVIN' ROOM, SWINGIN' IN ZHE KITCHEN! MOST FOLKS DON'T 'CAUSE ZHEY'RE TOO BUSY BITCHIN'! SWINGIN' IN ZHERE 'CAUSE SHE WANTED ME TO FEED HER, SO I MIXED UP ZHE BATTER UN SHE LICKED ZHE BEATER!"

But what I didn't see was Ludwig right behind his brother so that they were back to back doing air-guitars. Then he sang, "I SCREAM, YOU SCREAM, WE ALL SCREAM FOR HER! DON'T EVEN TRY 'CAUSE YOU CAN'T IGNORE HER!"

They took turns singing, and shared during the chorus and the end. I used my cell-phone to film the whole thing so that I may watch it OVER and OVER and OVER again. Especially since Ludwig was singing. Yet it was hard to imagine him singing this song of all songs out in the world. Well I knew very well that Gilbert loved to sing anything that consisted of rock n' roll. Most people asked me how I could stand his singing but I loved it and believed it was the most romantic thing ever since he sang to me on our first date. Kind of kinky but I accepted those sort of things.

Happily I ran into the room after the song ended and tackled Gilbert in a big hug. HE WAS SO ADORABLY AWESOME! "You and Ludwig sang so well!"

"Y-you heard?" Ludwig demanded.

"Frau~ Just you vait till I sing to you in bed-"

"Don't ruin the moment."

Gilbert pouted, "You did last time!"

"As if I'd get naked in front of you!"

"You should, I'm your awesome boyfriend."

"Moment officially ruined!" I began heading towards the door, "If you need me, I'll be in the garden."

Ashamed of himself for being overheard, Ludwig hid his face with his hands. "I'll join you!"

"H-hey! DON'T LEAVE MEEEEEE!"

"I wish I could-"

"Shut up, West! No one asked you!"