"Cheer up Sayuki." Rei begged Sayuki as they walked down the streets. Sayuki didn't respond though as she zoned in and out of her thoughts. With each step they took, the more weight Sayuki felt she was carrying on her shoulders. She didn't want to go to school; she wanted to cower in fear in the safety of her closet with her brother at her side. She couldn't though. Not after last night. She had to go to school in fear of her parents' cold wrath. She couldn't skip again.

Sayuki felt her arms getting shook and she came from the black hole in her mind. In front of her stood her brother. Behind him, there stood the darkening shadow of her school. Today even in the bright sun it seemed like a monster that wished to chew her up and spit her back out, crippled and helpless. Her arm began to sting from the harsh grip and she finally focused on her brother's worried stricken face.

"I'm sorry I got lost in my mind," Sayuki apologized with a fake small smile plastered onto her pale face. He didn't seem to fall for it and his eyes filled with dread. She grabbed his hand reassuringly and squeezed it. A smile grew on his face and he began to speak to her, his voice chipper.

"Forget about everything that happened. It's nothing at all! Just look forward to school and seeing all of your friends! You have that right?" Rei asked her, his smile blinding her. She couldn't hide behind her smile though, not even her usual weak one. Her eyes shrunk and darkened as she looked behind him again at the looming school. Cries of laughter and joy could be heard from the yard around it. Those sounds only echoed and created a high pitched pain in her head.

"I want to transfer..." Sayuki whimpered softly, her head down. Her brother's eyes widened. With his free hand he tilted her head up and examined her face seriously. Her eyes were glistening with tears that were about to emerge. He smiled softly and hugged her.

"Then transfer. I don't know the reason why, but I don't want to see you cry anymore." Her brother spoke gently, but he seemed to be so much older than Sayuki. She felt embarrassed that she had to get comfort from her younger brother whom she should be protecting and comforting. She felt so weak and dependant. She couldn't understand why he stood by her side every time she was down. She couldn't make sense of it. Why would anyone want to? "Do you want to tell me why?"

"I can't do either of those..." Sayuki sniffed as she attempted to stop the tears. She took in a deep breath and blew it out slowly to stop the sobbing. Soon her tears began to stop flowing and she wiped her eyes with the hem of her sleeve. Once her face was clear of tears she smiled weakly at him apologetically. She couldn't rely on her younger brother any further. She was only bringing him down more and more. He had too many problems himself being the only son of their family.

"Why can't you?" Rei urged her to tell him further but she shook her head slowly, closing her eyes to hide from his hurt eyes. Instead she just smiled and took another deep breath before she spoke.

"I can't disappoint anyone anymore or be such a burden." Sayuki replied strongly, the strongest she ever had before. She imagined Sakura who she idolized for her strength at times and tried to think how she would react in this situation. She imagined her burning smile, and replicated it. "I'm going to become stronger and protect myself so I don't worry you anymore with my silly tears." To her surprise when she opened her eyes she saw her brother smiling proudly.

"You're never a burden to me, but I know you'll definitely get stronger! Maybe you'll even be able to beat me in an arm wrestling contest!" Rei chuckled as he let her go, and stepped back. He began walking backwards as he waved goodbye to her. "If you need anything call me and I'll definitely save you within a flash!"

"Thank you." Sayuki smiled brightly, her face now glowing with new energy. He grinned back, before turning around and running towards his own school. Sayuki sighed, feeling a little lonely as he left her. She shook her head vigorously though and kept her smile up, letting only one tear slide down her face as she promised it would be her very last one. She was going to be strong from this moment on and become a different person once and for all. She had to, for the sake of her brother and friends. She had no choice or else she'd crack under the pressure.

"Are you crying?" Sayuki looked to her side to see Gaara coming towards her. She shook her head wildly, blowing the tear from her face. She took a deep breath and smiled. First, she would have to start with Gaara.

"Good morning!" Sayuki burst out as cheerfully as she could. Gaara looked slightly taken aback by her response and tripped. He caught himself though and looked at her blankly now. He blinked a few times, tilting his head as he studied her. He looked as though he was unsure of whom she was; if she was the girl he had seen the few times before.

"Good morning..." He spoke cautiously afraid she'd break like ice if he did something wrong. She didn't seem normal for a girl who had been drowned in somebody else's lunch. It was much too odd for him to comprehend. He decided to risk cracking the ice though. "Are you feeling better since yesterday?"

"Of course! I'm going to be strong now, like Sakura!" Gaara said an eyebrow at the comment. She seemed to be trying way too hard, but it seemed like a start for her. She was going to need to be tough if she wanted to stay at school. He smiled for a moment, but hid it quickly realizing he had let one slip. She didn't seem to catch it, lost in her own thoughts. It was only until he started to walk away that she spoke again. "I need to apologize to you."

"Apologize?" Gaara questioned her curiously as she looked to the ground. Suddenly her head shot up though and she took a deep breath. She looked him straight in the eye with determination surprising him once again.

"When you were in need when you were being attacked, I ran away from you. I didn't want to help you and you helped me so willingly and easily when Karin turned against me. It meant a lot to me... and I only wish I had the strength to help you then..." Sayuki explained nervously as she fidgeted with her hands. Gaara sighed, not expecting that from her. "I wasn't just frightened of them, but... of you too."

"It's fine, I can handle myself. Don't strain yourself to come near me." Gaara spitted out, his words more harsh than he had meant for them to be. She flinched at his words. Sayuki's eyes began to get teary and he tried to think of what to do. She took another breath though and with that her tears were gone as she blinked.

"I want to be your friend!" Sayuki shouted loud enough for other people to stop and stare at her. She noticed and her face turned red from embarrassment, but she kept her eyes locked on Gaara. Gaara looked at anyone and with a glare sent them fleeing. He had been shocked by her outburst.

"I don't think that's wise considering our position on the food chain at school..." Gaara replied, glancing towards the school ahead of them both. He looked back to Sayuki, shoving his hands roughly into his pockets before continuing. "We'd make for an easier target together and they'd make it worse for being together."

Sayuki stood there silent; her eyes lowered once more in defeat. Gaara took notice of this and felt a tang of sympathy for her. "I understand why you wouldn't want to be friend with me." Sayuki's voice was filled with defeat and heartbreak. He couldn't help but feel a little guilty especially when he wasn't used to this kind of behaviour.

He sighed and with his best effort forced himself to weasel out a smile. "Sorry I didn't mean that... it's fine if we're friends." Gaara relented. Sayuki's head whipped up making Gaara flinch as her neck cracked from the speed. Her eyes were wide with joy but they suddenly darkened and dulled. It was different from her usual shaky smile or disappointed face. It was more serious; more frightening and spooky. It didn't suit the sweet, fragile, innocent girl she seemed to be.

"I don't need another disappointment or broken promise..." Gaara stepped back as a chill ran up his back from her scratchy, yet deep voice. He couldn't speak. She seemed like another person, her voice and how she held herself were different from her usual unconfident self. He usually wasn't afraid of anything, ever, but for some reason the change in her told his instincts to be afraid.

"You won't..." The only words he could think of were those. He wasn't sure why she changed or what brought it on, but he didn't want to taunt her. He had the feeling this wasn't a side of Sayuki he wished to meet very often.

"So we'll be friend?" The light unsure voice was back, filled with joy. Gaara blinked. He wasn't sure if he had imagined the mood swing or if she was really two sided. Even her slumped shoulders and weak stance was back. It was really like he had imagined it all. He didn't believe it though; it wasn't something he'd just imagine. It was too abnormal. A voice in his head told him he'd have to watch her carefully and protect her to keep her normal. Was she cracking from the pressure?

"Yeah, friends..." Gaara nodded and Sayuki grinned widely for the first time. Was she as screwed up as he was? Was it even possible?


A/N: Thanks for the reviews. I relate bits and pieces to Sayuki and add experiences from my friends to her. I try to make her as relatable as possible even if it's not to the same extreme... just the same feelings and insecurities a lot of other people have. Well anyways enjoy and I hope you continue to review and even make hypothesis to the the future. I;d appreciate it if you also checked out any of my other stories or future ones! x]