Eileen eyed her breakfast with disdain. She wanted pancakes. Or a muffin. Or really anything that wasn't a thick mess of protein powder slop trying to masquerade itself as a 'smoothie.' At some point after her thirty-fifth birthday, she'd lost her taste for certain sacrifices made in the name of ballet. Eileen loved the prestige that came along with her position as prima ballerina but she was also tired. Her arches hurt and her calves ached. She didn't like the natural conclusion to all these complaints but knew the inevitable was on the horizon.

"Hey, mom," Erza said quietly, padding into the kitchen.

Eileen watched her daughter dip into the refrigerator for her own breakfast and wondered how time had managed to pass so quickly. It felt like only a few moments had gone by since Erza last smiled up at her with donut icing on her face while reaching for her hair with sticky fingers. Now Erza was sixteen with her own brand of grace and poise.

"Mom?" Erza smiled awkwardly and waved. "You're staring. What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Eileen murmured. She grasped the tumbler full of her breakfast and choked it down. Erza pulled a face. "Now you're staring."

"How can you drink that?" Erza asked, pulling the foil top off a cup of yogurt.

"I guess I'm used to it." Eileen rinsed the cup and set it on the rack. "What are your plans for today?"

"Jellal is taking his driving test in a little bit and then we're spending the afternoon at the pier. There's a regatta this weekend and you know how he is about boats."

"So is he taking you to the pier or making you come with him so he has someone to listen to his excited babbling?" Eileen asked with a grin.

"He's not making me," Erza muttered. "If I didn't go… never mind. It doesn't matter. He went with me to that weird series of plays in the park last winter so I don't mind listening to him go on about boats."

Eileen watched Erza scrape at the sides of her yogurt cup. She knew it wasn't really any of her business but she couldn't help her curiosity.

"That girl with the short hair has been making her way up the third floor of the academy quite a lot lately. What's her name again?"

Erza's jaw flexed and Eileen's mouth tried to twitch into a smirk but she held it off.

"Yukino," Erza said in an almost whisper.

"Is she interested in acro, too?"

"No."

"I see."

Erza tossed her yogurt cup into the garbage and fidgeted with her spoon. "I think she likes Jellal."

"Well he's a very likable boy."

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry, love, I don't mean to pry."

"It's okay. I'm just being moody." Erza turned to leave the kitchen and dress for the day but stopped at the door. "I'm helping out with the pre-ballet class tonight. Jellal said he'd wait and drive me home."

"Okay. I'll be with a choreographer until late afternoon and then I'm joining Anna for dinner. Please call if you need anything."

"Alright."

Erza disappeared around the corner and Eileen's fingers tapped restlessly against the countertop. She knew she needed to let Erza learn her own lessons in life and love but sometimes she wondered if a moment of blunt honesty wouldn't serve her more than pent up angst.


The front door of Anna's studio was propped open with a brick. Once Eileen stepped inside, she realized why. The entire first floor reeked of paint primer. Her sandals made very little noise as she crossed the newly laid flooring to the office. Eileen leaned over the latched bottom half of the door and found Anna scowling at several paint samples.

"Hey," Eileen chirped. "You look like you could use a break."

Anna glanced up at her and tossed the paint samples in her hand in with the others on the desk.

"I really could." She sighed and crossed the office to drape her arms across the door half and over Eileen's shoulders. "I know I promised dinner but these painters are taking forever."

"Let's do delivery then. I couldn't bring myself to wear real clothes today anyway."

Anna peeked over the door and laughed at Eileen's flip-flops and leggings. She kissed her quickly and reached for the doorknob.

"I've got a drawer full of menus. Please, come into my office," Anna said with a grin.

"Remember when the kids were so little they'd nap on the couch and get cracker crumbs everywhere?" Eileen said, sighing and relaxing against the cushions that were still soft after many years of use.

"Jellal still leaves cracker crumbs in the kitchen," Anna muttered, pulling the menus from a desk drawer. She took a seat next to Eileen and handed over the stack. "I'm starving and would eat anything. You pick what you want."

"I think you passed your eating habits onto your son."

Anna snorted. "I'm going to deny that until the day you catch me leaving crumbs in bed."

"How'd his driving test go, by the way?"

"Good. He goes a little faster than I'd like as his mother but he passed with high marks."

"Erza said he's driving her around today."

"I'm so glad she'll go to those insufferable regattas with him now. Whenever his dad is out of town that used to fall on me." Anna's hand shot out and she grabbed one of the menus. "This. Let's order from here."

"You said I get to pick!"

"You're taking too long." Anna pressed a kiss to Eileen's cheek. "Besides you like Indian."

"It's just so much rice." Eileen bit her lip and decided she wanted the rice. "I'm thirty-five," she whispered.

"What?"

"I'm thirty-five and I want carbs, Anna." Eileen set aside all the menus even though Anna's eyes followed them with longing. "I'm going to have to retire from Crocus Ballet soon."

"Who said that?" Anna scowled. "You're still in demand, Eileen! Just last summer you toured overseas! All to amazing reviews, by the way. Did someone say something to you?"

"No," Eileen whispered. "I just know it's coming. And I'm…" She sighed. "I'm both dreading it and looking forward to it. I feel old."

"Thirty-five isn't old," Anna insisted. "This is your prime!"

"Not for a ballet dancer. I'm well past my prime."

"Ballet is a thing you do. It's not who you are."

Eileen felt overcome with unexpected emotion. She slid her feet out of her sandals and brought them up against her chest.

"I don't know what else I can do with my life. I've done exactly two things. Ballet and food service. The teashop is gone and it's not like I can fall back on that." Her throat felt tight. "I feel like I'm back where I was when –"

"Help me run this studio," Anna blurted. Eileen blinked and her mouth fell open to reply but she only gaped. "We can do it together."

"I don't know anything about business, though."

"Sure you do! You practically ran that teashop before the old lady died. You know about accounts and vendors and all that. Plus, Eileen, you're an absolute master at your craft. Do you know how many people in this city alone would pay an arm and a leg for you to tutor their child?"

Eileen made a face similar to the one Erza made that morning. "Nobody wants a retired old hag to –"

"Eileen, I swear to god, if you call yourself old one more time in front of me I'm going to smack you. And anyway, what do you think retired dancers do? They teach. I know you said before it wasn't your forte, but you'll figure it out."

"I don't know…"

Anna reached over and tucked a wisp of crimson hair behind one ear and smiled. "You remember that day you walked in here? I do. This is our full circle. Come work with me. I want you here."

Eileen folded her legs beneath her and leaned into Anna. "Are you sure you can put up with me all day?"

"I've already tamed the tiger," Anna said with a grin. "I think I can handle having her around all day."

"Why am I the tiger? You're the one with ravenous belly."

"Because the men are always afraid of you."

"Good." Eileen kissed her and brushed her tongue against Anna's bottom lip. Her fingers inched beneath the hem of Anna's tank top but the rumbling of her stomach brought everything to a halt. Anna grinned.

"Okay so maybe I'm also a hungry tiger."

Eileen laughed and pulled out her phone. "Alright, alright. I suppose it's about that time."

Anna stole one last kiss and whispered against Eileen's lips, "Don't forget the rice."


A drop of sweat rolled down the back of Erza's neck. She wanted to remove her jacket – and would've under any other circumstance – but thought her camisole too revealing. Instead she pushed her jacket sleeves up and crouched in front of Kagura Mikazuchi.

"I think you'll get it if you practice this week at home just a little more."

The girl scowled. "I hate it."

"Your dad won't let you do fencing until you do at least one show here," Erza whispered. "I'll make sure you have a super easy part in the summer program, okay? Then you can forget about ballet slippers and worry about swords."

Kagura chewed on her cheek and glanced up at the observation glass nervously. "You promise?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die."

"Okay." Kagura smiled for once and shuffled her feet. "Thanks, Erza."

"You're welcome. Why don't you go ahead and get your stuff. I think we're done for the night."

Kagura dashed off and Erza was left to awkwardly slink toward the exit. She could feel his eyes through the glass and hated every second of it. The sooner Kagura was out of ballet, the better.

Erza stuffed her belongings into her bag and peeked out between the dressing room doors. She scowled. Jellal wasn't anywhere she could immediately see. This meant she'd need to venture out into the hallway alone and risk running into Simon.

"Fuck," she whispered. Erza sucked in a deep breath and pushed open the door. The hallway was empty. She let the breath loose and took the walk to the lobby at a casual pace. Just before she reached the last corner, the stairwell door swung open and Simon strode out. He grinned at her and Erza felt the cold sweat from before return. She froze.

"Hey, Erza," he said slowly. "You looked great in class tonight."

"Uh, it's not really a thing I dress for," she murmured, trying to contemplate how many steps away from the lobby she was.

"You still looked amazing. I mean, you always do. The kids love you."

"Yeah…"

"Hey listen, I was wondering if maybe you'd want to come out with me later? Maybe I could drop off my sister and we could meet somewhere?"

"It's kind of late for that isn't it?" Erza protested weakly. Her palms felt clammy and she couldn't breathe without tasting Simon's strong cologne.

"Come on, it's summer! I got my license last month; I could pick you up and bring you home. It's not a big deal."

"Well –" The sound of soft feminine laughter came from around the corner and Erza's head snapped toward it. She pursed her lips and felt a slow anger rise in the back of her throat. Jellal wasn't waiting for her because Yukino had distracted him.

"Erza?" Simon touched her shoulder and Erza jumped back. "What about that date?"

"I don't think so, Simon," she blurted. "I need to get home. Sorry." Erza spun on her heel and all but ran around the last corner. Her anger boiled over at the sight of Yukino standing entirely too close to Jellal. His smile was genuine and when she touched his shoulder, Erza thought her cheeks might actually catch fire with rage. She stalked toward them, still feeling Simon's eyes on her back, and poked Jellal in the same shoulder Yukino's fingers had just been violating. "Can we go?"

The words came out harsher than she'd wanted and Yukino flushed. Jellal stared at her in confusion. He cleared his throat awkwardly and turned back to Yukino.

"I'll see you on Monday, okay? We'll talk about it then."

"Okay," Yukino's voice was soft and sweet. Erza hated it. She instantly felt bad for her behavior when Yukino turned to her. "Goodnight, Erza."

"Yeah, sure." Erza left them both behind in the hallway and balled her fists in her jacket pocket. She wanted to cry. In the space of ten minutes her day had gone from decent to absolutely horrible.

The dance academy lobby was nearly empty and Erza continued her fast pace to the outside. Once she was through the doors, she filled her lungs with the warm summer air. Tears stung her eyes and she quickly wiped them dry.

"Hey," Jellal called from behind her. Erza didn't stop and took the steps down to the sidewalk quicker than she really should have. "Hey," he said again, wrapping his hand around her elbow. "Erza."

"What?"

"What's the matter with you?" He spun her around and pursed his lips. "Are you crying?"

"No," she said, trying to swallow the lump in her throat. Her body betrayed her and hot, embarrassed tears leaked from her eyes. "Okay, fine. Yeah, I'm crying."

"Why?" his tone was softer as he pulled her away from the academy toward the side parking lot. "What happened?"

Erza's thoughts wheeled. Where should she even start?

"Simon cornered me in the hallway and you –" She poked at his shoulder again. "Weren't there when I came out of the dressing room! I was alone with him and he kept asking me to – to –"

"To what, Erza?" he pressed in an almost whisper.

"Are you going to go out with Yukino? Like go out with her?" she blurted in a moment of total frustration. Jellal's mouth hung open then shut abruptly. He took his hand away from her arm and slid them both into his pockets.

"Is there a reason why I shouldn't?"

Erza felt like the wind had been punched from her lungs. Yes! She wanted to scream. But that kind of outburst would lead to an examination of all the things they meant to each other and that was the monster in Erza's closet. She didn't want to have that discussion – she thought if they avoided it, then she could keep him just as he was forever and never risk losing anything.

"Erza –" Jellal sighed and his head fell backwards. "Let's go, okay? It's late."

"Okay," she whispered. Erza followed him to his car and tossed her bag into the backseat before sliding into the front.

The drive back to her apartment building was silent. Erza kept her eyes on the city beyond the window but could feel Jellal's quiet looks. He said nothing until he pulled into the building's small circle driveway. A sigh broke the silence.

"Erza, are you gonna tell me what that was all about? I can't fix it if I don't know what I did."

"You didn't do anything," Erza managed to say despite the tightness that hadn't left her throat. "It's me. I'm just so tired."

"I shouldn't have asked you to go to the pier with me. All that walking and then your class –"

"That's not what I mean. I'm just tired. I don't like having Simon's sister in that class. She hates it, you know? She wants to do fencing."

"I believe it. She seems like the type of kid who'd be into swordplay."

Erza laughed and some of the weight on her shoulders eased off. "I'm sorry for snapping at you. Will you apologize to Yukino for me? I – I don't want your girlfriend to hate me." She nearly choked on the word girlfriend.

"She isn't my girlfriend, Erza, but she might be." His expression was pained when she glanced over at him. "I don't want this to come between us, Erza. If you don't like her or if you think there's… another reason I shouldn't go out with her…" Jellal trailed off and Erza's heart pounded violently.

"No," she whispered in defeat. "There's no reason you shouldn't go out with her." She tried to smile but knew it was an ugly thing. "She's great, Jellal. I'll see you later, okay? At practice or whatever."

"Erza –"

She didn't let him finish. Erza yanked on the door handle and stumbled from his car. It wasn't until his headlights disappeared around the circle and corner that she realized she'd left her bag in his car.


"Why does your phone keep beeping?" Mirajane asked, picking through her bag of jellybeans.

"It's nothing." Erza twisted strands of Mirajane's hair into what was supposed to be a complicated braid but was actually just a mess. She raked her fingers through it and the whole thing fell apart.

"Did you just yank all that work out?" Mirajane ran her own fingers through her hair. "Why?"

"I'm not really good at braiding," Erza muttered, flopping backward onto Mirajane's bed.

"Bullshit," Mirajane said, twisting her mass of hair back into a band. "You're hair is always fabulous when you're on stage."

"Jellal does that for me," she whispered. Her phone beeped again, and Erza groaned dramatically. "That's him."

She didn't stop Mirajane from scrolling through two days of unanswered texts from Jellal on her phone.

"Are you not speaking to him? Why?"

"He's got a girlfriend."

"A girlfriend? Like… one that's not you?" Mirajane tossed the phone aside and crawled up to the bed.

"Yes."

Mirajane made a face and tapped her fingers on the fringed edge of a pillow. "It's that one girl, right? The one with hair like mine?"

"How did you know that?"

"Call it my feminine intuition."

"Your what?"

"I just remember her being backstage after your spring show. She was laying it on pretty thick." Mirajane made a smug noise. "She can get away with it because she's so cutesy but it was super obvious."

"This sucks."

"I told you to just tell him how you felt. This is your fault."

Erza sat up and glared at her phone. "No, it's his fault."

"Listen, sweetie, most boys are dumb as a box of rocks. Jellal is smart." Mirajane sat up and snatched Erza's phone from the floor. "He's totally in love with you but keeps it under control because he values your relationship as it is."

"I don't know what you mean."

"You know, I think it's you who's dumb, Erza. He's playing it safe. Jellal cares about you and your friendship and partnership – which, by the way, he keeps up for you."

Erza bit her lip in frustration. Of course she knew that. He'd told her when they were thirteen he'd never be a soloist.

"He sees the way Simon tries to piss on your leg every time you walk into a room. The boys at school are too intimidated by Simon to come on to you and none of those boys at your dance school would dare step on Jellal's toes. That whole thing is really sexist and gross, you are not Jellal's property, but that's neither here nor there. You're stuck. These boys have you in a corner."

"I don't know what to do."

"Well, first you need to make up with Jellal. I love you, Erza, but we both know he's your best friend. Fix that first. Then we'll get you a date that's not Simon."

"But you just said –"

Mirajane laughed. "Do you think the only place to snag a guy is at school or your dance classes? You need to get out more."

Erza took her phone from Mirajane and turned it over in her hands. So Jellal would date Yukino. So what? She could live with that – kind of – and only if Mirajane could point her at a boy who, hopefully, was nothing like Jellal.


Erza's bedroom was dark except for the glow of her phone. She stared at her unsent message and bit her lip.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," she muttered and tapped the send button.

'I'm sorry. I've been shitty lately. It's not your fault.'

'I don't want to fight with you. Is this about Yukino?'

Erza sighed and swallowed her frustration. She would not ruin anything Jellal had with Yukino because she was jealous. If he wanted to go out with her and kiss her and whatever that was fine. It was fine.

'I just want you to be happy. If she makes you happy, then I'm happy.'

Jellal didn't respond for several long minutes.

'I was never unhappy. I can't stand it if you're mad at me, Erza.'

'Am I the reason you stay in dance?'

'Yes.' The response came immediately and Erza frowned.

'Why?'

'Because you're my best friend and I love you. You love it and you need a partner. So here I am.'

'Does Yukino hate me?'

'Nobody hates you.'

'I love you too. I'll see you tomorrow morning for practice?'

'And every morning until you're sick of it.'

'You're dumb. Goodnight.'

'Maybe I'm dumb but you're not running for the hills either.'

'Go to bed, Jellal.'

'As you wish.'

Erza's stomach flipped over. The Princess Bride had been her favorite movie until the DVD was permanently gouged in a battle with the DVD player. Did he really mean 'as you wish' as in… as you wish?

She slid her phone under her pillow and stared into the darkness. Why did everything have to be so complicated now?