Loved ones decompose, we'll dance around their bones! Most of us are holy ghosts, all of us are holy ghosts!"
Itachi wrinkled his nose. The speaker in Suigetsu's car was vibrating from strain, an unfortunate rattle resonating from the door. The audio would mute out during particularly loud parts. It didn't exactly help that he wasn't a fond of…this…screaming.
Itachi was a little worried that Suigetsu wouldn't be able to drive safely while banging his head like that but—well, he was already in for the ride.
"There," he instructed, pointing towards the off ramp, "exit there."
"Thanks, Siri," Suigetsu grinned, not bothering to turn his blinker on as he moved over a lane.
Itachi frowned. Suigetsu sped down the exit lane, a little too fast for Itachi's taste. He found himself more than once pressing his foot into the floor of the passenger side, as if he could brake the car himself. "Turn left onto Magnolia."
"How do you know the directions so well?" Suigetsu asked. Itachi's heart filled with joy as he turned the music down.
"I merely studied the map and directions," he replied, slightly absently, as he stared out the window.
He was anxious. Eager. Because he hadn't seen Kisame in almost two damn months. And now he was only a few minutes from being able to see him again. And touch him, and smell him. And kiss him.
Absence really did make the heart grow fonder. He had spent so much time with Kisame, had nearly twenty-four seven access to him on his phone. It made him take for granted the little things Kisame did that he couldn't get enough of. The way he touched his hair, fitting it into place behind his ear or running his fingers through the ends. The deep rumble in Kisame chest when he let out a sleepy chuckle. The way their fingers fit together when they held hands.
Itachi had cycled through all of the sweatshirts he had stolen from his boyfriend. They didn't smell like him anymore.
His heart was throwing a tantrum.
Suigetsu drove under an overpass as instructed, and Itachi smiled when he saw the street sign for Hickory Avenue.
"The airport is right off of this road. Look for the JetBlue lane."
The time difference between the states and Upolu was—confusing. When he googled 'what time is it in Upolu' and saw that the clock was only a few hours ahead of his current time, he thought it wasn't so bad. But then he noticed that the date read the next day. It still wasn't terribly hard to talk, but it's just wasn't the same.
Suigetsu's phone buzzed, and Itachi snatched it before Suigetsu could even think about texting and driving. "He's waiting outside," he informed him, not able to hide the excitement in his voice.
"You gonna surprise him?" Suigetsu asked.
"How?"
Suigetsu slowed the car down, swerving dangerously towards the curb. "Get out here and you can meet us up there where I'll stop."
Itachi hopped out while the car was still moving—since there was no way Suigetsu was planning on stopping (and it was probably safer that he didn't)—and began slowly weaving his way through the scattered people and towards the terminal. There were a handful of couples hugging as they were reunited, and his heart pricked a little.
He saw Kisame, two bags at his side, sitting on a bench, hunched forward with his elbows on his knees. Itachi paused there in the peripheral, watching as he waved to Suigetsu and stood up. They did the highfive-fistbump-chestbump thing Kisame always greeted his cousins with. Itachi quietly approached him from the back. Suigetsu made brief eye contact with him, immediately engaging Kisame in conversation to keep him distracted.
"So how was your trip, man?" Itachi heard Suigetsu ask, patting Kisame's arm roughly a couple times.
"It was good. I'm glad I got to be with my family."
"You go surfing?"
Kisame nearly moaned. "Oh, I went surfing. I swear—"
Itachi took that moment to tap him on the shoulder.
Kisame turned around, a mild mix of annoyance and confusion on his face. Itachi was gifted with the most comical expression he had ever seen Kisame wear, all shock and surprise and—
"Itachi?"
Itachi smiled a little, unable to help the bubbling little well of happiness in his chest. "Hi."
"I thought—you said that—you're supposed to be working—"
Itachi couldn't remember ever seeing Kisame so flustered and confused. He enjoyed it immensely. "I know. A coworker owed me a favor and picked up my shift." He tilted his head. "Are you not happy to see me?"
Kisame suddenly broke out into a huge grin, and the next thing Itachi knew he was crushed against Kisame's broad chest. "I was going to force Suigetsu to drop my by your work so I could see you." He pressed the words into Itachi's hair between kisses. "Holy shit, Itachi, I missed you so much."
Itachi hummed, content with the vice of Kisame's arms.
"We were in the middle of a conversation, cousin," Suigetsu said from the side.
"You don't matter anymore," Kisame muttered, grabbing Itachi's chin and tilting his head up for a kiss.
Suigetsu snorted. "Alright, love birds, get the fuck in the car. I'm gonna get a ticket if I stay parked here too much longer."
Itachi was just barely able to pry Kisame's face away from his own. They quickly loaded Kisame's bags into the trunk and hopped into the back seats. Kisame immediately pulled Itachi into his arms, sucking the purplish ring of a hickey into Itachi's neck as Suigetsu pulled away from the curb.
Now, Itachi wasn't really one for PDA. So maybe it could be attributed to the month they spent apart, but Itachi's resolve flew out the window, and he found himself half lying on the seat, pressed up against the door, Kisame gripping onto him so tightly he was nearly light headed. Kisame had one hand underneath Itachi's shirt, grasping there at the skin stretched around his hipbone, and Itachi threaded his fingers into Kisame's hair and tugged, trying so very hard to not make any noise as Kisame kissed the living daylights out of him.
Suigetsu started laughed, and when Itachi managed to open his eyes and peer to the side, he saw Suigetsu with one hand on the wheel, the other holding a phone in the air.
"I'm snapchatting this all to Sasuke, you know."
Kisame's tongue did something very slick against his, and Itachi couldn't find the will to care.
"Missed you," he murmured between kisses, sliding his hands to either side of Kisame's face.
Kisame grunted in agreement; his lips otherwise stayed occupied.
Eventually Itachi pushed Kisame away, running a hand over his hair and licking his lips. Kisame begrudgingly moved into a sitting position, only with the constituent that Itachi followed suit and stayed pressed tight up against his side.
"You got darker," Itachi murmured, eyes and fingers tracing the swells and dips of the muscles on Kisame's arm.
"The sun tends to do that," Kisame snickered. "You like that? My skin darker?"
Itachi hummed, unwilling to give anything away. "I like you just the way you are, whatever that may be."
"My muscles got bigger, too. Can you tell?"
"Such a show off." Oh, how Itachi missed that grin. He tucked himself into Kisame's chest. "Tell me about your trip."
"What do you want to know?"
Everything. Itachi hesitated. "Well—how did the funeral go?"
"Ah." Kisame rubbed slow circled into Itachi's back. "It was really good to happen. It still hurts, but I think my aunt healed a lot."
Itachi nodded, kissing the base of Kisame's neck, right at the hollow. "Of course. I'm happy for you."
"Thanks, baby."
"Did you have any fun?"
Kisame grinned. "Hell yeah. Food, surfing, sun…the only thing I was missing was a something pretty to play with at night." He winked.
"Thank you for staying faithful despite my absence," Itachi replied dryly, one corner of his lips tilting up.
Kisame laughed loudly and tightened the hold around his waist. "I'm only joking, of course."
"I know."
"What about you? What have you been up to?"
Itachi looked up thoughtfully at the ceiling of the car. "I made a new friend," he offered.
"New friend?" Kisame's hand gave a sharp squeeze to his middle. "Yeah?"
Itachi hummed. "Do you remember the date I took you on?"
"Of course I do. I almost threw up that night."
Itachi's eyebrows shot up his forehead. "Threw up?"
"Yeah, I was excited as hell that you were initiating a date. And I was nervous."
"You had no reason to be nervous," Itachi murmured softly, pointer finger brushing down the length of Kisame's nose.
"'Course I was. I think you underestimate exactly how smitten I was."
Itachi quirked an eyebrow. "Was?"
"And still am, of course. I've just done a rather good job wooing you," a wink, "and I'm not worried about you taking off right now."
"Wow, a lot has changed since you left. Looks like I won't be needing to feed you bacon any time soon." Itachi kissed his nose. "I'm glad."
Kisame chuckled. "I still expect the bacon. Anyways, you didn't finish telling me who your friend was?"
"Oh. Right. Well, do you remember the couple we met there?"
"Vaguely…?"
"Maria, the wife, gave me her number that night."
Kisame faked an outraged expression. "You took another woman's number on a date with me? And here my loyalty is in question."
Itachi rolled his eyes, fighting the urge to cover his smile—there was no point hiding it from Kisame anymore. "It was to her work."
"And what took you so long to call her?"
Itachi shrugged. "I just never thought of it."
Kisame chuckled. "What could have possibly made you think of it?"
"Perhaps your absence."
"Well, regardless, I'm glad you made friends."
"Good, because I promised her a double date."
Kisame tugged on Itachi's arms, coaxing him in closer. "With that stoic guy? I look forward to it."
Itachi settled into his chest, turning his head to the side to kiss his neck.
"Are you lovebirds almost done? I'm gonna vomit all over the windshield."
"Sorry that you don't have a girlfriend," Kisame snarked, threading his fingers in between Itachi's.
"Hey. I can get it whenever I want," Suigetsu defended.
Itachi rolled his eyes.
"I saw that, pretty boy. What are you implying?!" He glared back at him through the rear view mirror.
"Why don't you keep your eyes on the road, Suigetsu," Itachi sighed.
He very begrudgingly complied.
Itachi and Kisame made absent conversation as Suigetsu sped down the highway. Itachi kept his fingers in between Kisame's, or had them trace the curve of his jaw or nose. Kisame wouldn't take his eyes off of him, often leaning forward to kiss his face, hair, or neck.
"Damn, I'm fuckin' starved," Kisame muttered eventually, looking out the window as signs for fast food restaurants passed by.
"Have you not eaten?"
A snort. "Just plane food. So, yeah, basically nothing." He pressed his lips again to Itachi's hair. "Shit, I totally emptied my fridge before I left, too."
"Do you want to run through a drive through?" Suigetsu asked. "Also, whose house am I heading back to first?"
"Ah, I don't want to slow Itachi down—"
"I have an idea," Itachi interrupted, turning around in Kisame's arms to look at him.
Kisame raised an eyebrow. "What's that?"
"Come over to my place…?"
Kisame tilted his head. "I mean, I love the offer, but I know you have work and—"
"And you won't interfere with it. You don't have any food at your house, and you're jetlagged. Just rest at my house for a little while."
Kisame narrowed his eyes a little. "And how long is 'a little while?'"
Itachi shrugged, doing to his best to act blasé. "A day or two."
Kisame grinned slowly. "Do you really care about my sleep schedule, or did you just miss me that much?"
"I'm not saying I didn't miss you." He tugged on the neckline of Kisame's shirt a little bit. "I'm partially worried that you won't take care of yourself the right way."
"You want to take care of me." That grin wasn't going anywhere.
Itachi shrugged a little, but his eyes had a fleck of mischief in them.
Kisame sobered up enough to look at him seriously for a moment. "Are you sure you won't mind?"
"Very." Itachi brushed some hair over his shoulder. "It's only a few days. Besides, I think Sasuke's sick of me crawling in bed with him every other night."
"Okay, so am I going to fucking Wendy's or not?" Suigetsu demanded, hovering in the exit lane.
"Just head to my place, Suigetsu." He squeezed Kisame's hand happily. "Thank you again for driving us, it is very considerate of you."
"I should get fuckin' paid for all this chauffeuring shit."
"Then become a taxi driver," Kisame retorted. "We get a friends and family discount, 100% off."
Suigetsu rolled his eyes in the rear view mirror for them to see.
Ten minutes later and Suigetsu was pulling into the parking lot to Itachi's apartment, the radio once again on full blast. Kisame had his hands over Itachi's ears.
"Thank you, Suigetsu, for your stellar taxi service," Kisame started as he opened the door. "As always, I regret it."
Suigetsu snorted, waving a hand.
Kisame barely got his bags out of the trunk and shut the lid before he was speeding off.
"Kisame, he's going to seriously hurt himself driving one day."
Kisame grinned. "Nah. He acts like an idiot, but I think he'll be fine."
Itachi wasn't quite convinced.
"What do you think Sasuke's gonna say when he sees me waltzing into your apartment?" Kisame asked, picking his bags up.
"I'd guess nothing," Itachi replied, helping Kisame by slinging his backpack over his arm. "Either way, you're not going to let Sasuke scare you away now, are you?"
"Nope." He was grinning again.
Sasuke didn't say nothing, but Itachi was pleased with how gracious he acted. Maybe he was even a little relieved that Itachi wouldn't be quite so annoying about missing him all day long anymore. He even helped lug all the bags into Itachi's room.
When Sasuke left the room, Itachi quite predictably ended up crushed underneath Kisame in the mess of sheets on his bed, hips fitted together perhaps a little too well. Itachi was all but moaning as Kisame bit and sucked a pattern of hickeys into the skin about his collar bones and neck. Kisame's hands somehow felt hotter than he remembered, and they gripped his hips and waist and arms so tightly Itachi thought he might pass out.
It was intoxicating, for too intoxicating for Itachi to handle with any sense of right mind. And suddenly it just wasn't enough, just kissing and touching and being close. It wasn't nearly enough, not when he loved him so much, not when he had missed him so much, and Itachi guessed it wouldn't be enough until he could feel skin on skin, until Kisame was bare to him and moving on him and over him and in him and—
He shifted his hips up, grinding them only barely into Kisame's. One hand pushed under his shirt and jerked it up until it got caught between their two bodies, hand snagged in the material as Kisame responded to his movement.
Itachi had to bite into his bottom lip once Kisame grinded down into the cradle of Itachi's hips with slow, sure motions. He was about to try and work his shirt off when a sudden rush of cold air whooshed over him. He blinked up at the ceiling and pushed himself up with his elbows.
"No, no, no," Kisame moaned into the floor, face down on his stomach.
"…Kisame?"
"We can't."
"What?" Itachi was still slightly dazed.
"We can't…do any of that."
Itachi blinked. "What?" he repeated.
"I just got back, and we're both hyper emotional and—I bet 100 bucks if we do anything, you'll regret it later." His words were a little muffled since his face was still smooshed against the floor. "I'm not letting that happen."
Itachi sat up, folding his legs under him. Kisame was…right, and as his head cleared, he began to fully grasp that. He still was holding on to the deal he made with himself that he wasn't going to snag their relationship before he knew they were in love. And he was certain that if they did have sex, he would definitely regret it.
"Hey," he started, staring at Kisame's back. "Are you going to come back here?"
"No."
"And why would that be?"
"Because I just turned down having sex with you, and now I kinda just wanna lay on the floor for the rest of my life."
Itachi laughed a little. "Come back here."
Kisame stayed horizontal, but turned his head to look at him. "You're going to tempt me, aren't you?"
"No," Itachi laughed even louder. "I just want to be close to you for a second."
"Only a second?"
"Many, many seconds. But I only have so many before I have to get to work, so would you please stand up and come over here already?"
With a gusty sigh, Kisame pushed himself to his feet and plopped himself down on the bed next to Itachi. "What were you thinking, trying to have sex when you're about to run off for work?"
Itachi pushed stray hair behind Kisame's ear. "You're right. I wasn't thinking."
Kisame pulled him back into his arms, unable to resist the contact. "For the sake of my sanity, could you do me the favor of thinking next time?"
Itachi laughed. "Yes, I will. I promise." After a moment, and a very tiny bit of nuzzling, Itachi pulled back to look him in the eyes. "You are very good to me," he said quietly.
"'Course I am," Kisame grunted, gaze slanting down away from Itachi and toward the floor. "You're my boyfriend, and you're special to me. I'm gonna treat you right. You know that." He kissed the side of his head on his hair.
Itachi thought that there was one particular way to say that in fewer words.
Looks like he would have to keep waiting.
"You really do look tired," he commented, gently brushing a finger under Kisame's eyes. "Why don't you sleep?"
Kisame rubbed his hand over his hair a couple times. "Can I shower first? I feel like the airport."
"Of course. You remember where the bathroom is, yes?"
Kisame nodded, standing up and stretching his arms above his head.
"Your toothbrush is in a drawer off to the right. I put a label on it. And there's towels over the bar on the wall."
Kisame chuckled. "So considerate." He knelt down next to his suitcase to rummage up a clean pair of clothes to wear as Itachi slipped out of the room and toward the kitchen.
While Kisame showered, Itachi dug through the fridge to find something for Kisame to eat. He managed to find some frozen waffles and hamburger patties.
He wasn't one hundred percent sure what he was supposed to do with that.
He heard Kisame come out of the bathroom and returned to his bedroom. "You're still hungry, yes?" He asked. Kisame had done him the favor of wearing real clothes instead of just a towel, which saved him from having to stare.
"Is there food?" Kisame countered.
"Hamburger and waffles. You can make some sort of chicken and waffles spin off with it?"
Kisame chuckled, rubbing a towel over his head. "Maybe I'll separate them?"
"That might be a good idea," Itachi agreed quietly. His eyes flicked over Kisame's body.
Kisame jerked his chin up at him. "What do you want?"
"Hm?"
"You look like you want something," Kisame clarified.
"Just you."
A grin. "I've got plenty of that," Kisame chuckled, sidling up next to him, hands immediately heading to Itachi's ass.
Itachi hummed, taking the initiative for a kiss, and let his finger map out the swells of Kisame's biceps. When they were thoroughly familiarized, he slipped his hands underneath Kisame's shirt.
His skin was invitingly hot.
"Are you thinking?" Kisame murmured before sucking Itachi's bottom lip into his mouth.
Itachi chuckled, planting one last kiss to Kisame's mouth before pulling away. "Yes. Are you?"
"Not when you touch me like that, no."
Itachi snorted, reaching for his hand. "What are you going to do when we actually have sex?"
"Short circuit and die."
"Please don't."
Kisame squeezed his hand and grinned.
Itachi had to look away from his eyes, lest he stop thinking again. "Did you want that chicken and waffles knock off?"
Kisame grinned. "I'll take the hamburger now, if you're offering. Just so that we're clear, if I'm staying here, I'll be giving you money to buy groceries."
"That's fair," Itachi conceded lightly. He peaked around Kisame at the suitcase before letting go of his hand and walking towards it. "I can do your laundry if you want," he began, kneeling down and thumbing through some of his shirts.
"Uh—" Kisame knelt down suddenly, grabbing both of Itachi's hands. "I'll sort through this; I'll know what's already been cleaned and what's dirty."
Itachi blinked. "Alright. I'll go heat up something for you to eat. Put your dirty clothes in the laundry room at the end of the hall.
Kisame kissed his cheek.
Itachi had two hamburger patties grilling on a pan when Kisame came back into the kitchen, bare chested, wearing only sweatpants.
"Are you ever going to put on clothes, or do you plan on wandering around my house naked your whole stay?" Itachi asked in murmur.
Kisame chuckled. "Why? Does it bother you?"
"Define 'bother.'"
Kisame grinned, coming up behind Itachi and grabbing him around the waist. He kissed his neck. "It smells good. I'm proud of you for not burning this." he jerked his head towards the skillet.
Itachi sighed. "I do believe that joke stopped being funny a little while ago," Itachi murmured, turning the gas off and moving the patties onto a plate. He set it on the table and got the potatoes out of the microwave.
"Did they? I must have missed that memo."
He let Kisame eat, heading to the laundry room to take care of the laundry. There wasn't a lot, but it was enough to keep him busy for a few minutes. He heard the water turn on in the kitchen and rushed out to take Kisame's dirty dishes from him. "I'll take care of it," he assured. "You rest."
Kisame raised an eyebrow. "I do know basic adult functions, babe. I've been taking care of myself my entire adult life."
"I know," Itachi replied lightly, rinsing his plate off. "But I want you to rest. Your toothbrush is in the bathroom."
"You're going to be doing dishes almost all night at the restaurant," he argued.
"So what's one more?"
Kisame stared at him for a moment before sighing and exiting the kitchen.
Itachi smiled when he heard the bathroom door open.
The dishes cleaned and the table wiped down, Itachi quite nearly skipped his way back to his bedroom. He was feeling awfully happy and bubbly, Kisame living in his house, Kisame back home, safe and happy.
Kisame, passed out in his bed, blankets tangled around his legs.
Itachi smiled, flicking out the lights on the wall. He pulled an extra blanket from underneath his bed, gently spreading it over him so he wouldn't get cold.
"Nii-san," Sasuke said from the doorway. "Why aren't you already gone? You know you're gonna be late for work, right?"
Itachi turned around on a dime, smiling graciously as he walked towards the door. "I'll be fine. I just wanted to make sure Kisame was comfortable."
"He looks pletnty comfortable to me," Sasuke muttered, letting Itachi pass by him. "Remind me why he's here, again, when he has a much bigger, fancier house than us?"
"Because I love him very much and want to take care of him." Itachi patted Sasuke's cheek. "Do attend to him when he wakes up, baby brother."
Sasuke sighed, casting Kisame one last glance before closing the door. He'd forgotten how demanding 'in-love' Itachi was.
Kisame pushed the door of Itachi's bedroom open with a massive yawn. Checking his phone, he saw that Itachi should be getting off work about now. He hadn't meant to sleep so long—he must have been more tired than he thought.
He was in the kitchen checking for those waffles Itachi promised—he was going to go buy Itachi groceries since he was staying over, anyways. They were in the toaster, syrup readied on the counter, when he noticed the picture frame sitting on the counter.
It was of Itachi's parents.
Sasuke and he weren't in it like the one in Itachi's room. In fact—it looked like it could be a wedding photo, maybe. The woman had beautiful black hair, all done up with white flowers. The man was wearing black Japanese robes—shit, Kisame knew he had read the name of it somewhere. Kimono, or Yukata or—something like that. Kisame told himself he would look it up later.
"That was taken on their wedding day," a voice said from the hallway.
Kisame's head snapped up. Ah, so he was right.
"Your parents were beautiful," Kisame said honestly.
"They were," Sasuke agreed.
"What were their names?"
"Fugaku was my father, Mikoto my mother."
"Mikoto," Kisame sounded out. "That sounds lovely."
"Almost as lovely as she was a mother." He tapped his fingers against the wall. "Did Itachi tell you how it happened?"
"How what happened?"
"Their murders, of course."
Kisame shook his head, a little shocked. Yeah, it had clearly been a while, but—he was still surprised that Sasuke was willing to tell him, or use such strong language.
Sasuke stepped into the room, gazing at the photo with Kisame. "Itachi was down the street doing yardwork for a family—it was how he made money back then, he mowed lawns and cut hedges and shit. My dad made him pay for all his own things, but my mom used to slip him twenties in his laundry to help him out." A fond smile twitched at his lips for a moment. "I was late at school for a martial arts class. I got home later than normal because my classmate, who was giving me a ride home, got his backpack locked up in a classroom, and his mom had to track down the janitor to unlock the room."
Sasuke didn't say anything for a moment. "They accused Itachi of murder, originally, you know."
Kisame nearly blanched. "What?"
"When I got home, all the lights were off in the house. I knew something was wrong, because my mom couldn't stand it when the house was dark. I walked into the living room and…there was blood all over the floor, and my mom and dad were slumped over each other. It stuck with me for so long, how they looked. It wasn't a random killing, they were executed, lined up next to each other on their knees and then shot like they were prisoners." Sasuke took the photo out of Kisame's hands and set it back on the table. "Itachi was standing over them, and he had blood on his hands and on his clothes. I started screaming, but he just stood there, blank-faced."
Kisame stared.
The toaster dinged.
"Someone reported the gunshots, apparently, because that was about when the police showed up. I was screaming for Itachi, but he wouldn't move, and the police handcuffed him and put him in a different car than me. They questioned me about Itachi, and why I thought he would kill them. I tried telling them that he didn't do it, but they wouldn't believe me. Itachi was spit up through the legal system for almost a year—"
"I don't know if Itachi wants me to know this," Kisame started.
Sasuke shrugged. "I'm only telling you my experiences. Besides, do you think I would betray my brother's trust for—what, you?"
Kisame had to agree, even if it was a little backhanded. "Alright, then."
"Anyways," Sasuke continued, "my father had greatly offended our extended family in Japan before they left to America, so when the police contacted them about Itachi and the murders their only statement was 'he probably did it,' and then the dropped all contact."
"Holy shit," Kisame mumbled.
"After that Itachi got sent to Juvenile prison."
Kisame stared at him. "Are you making this up."
"I wish. He was there for three months. He was too young to be tried as an adult where we lived, so the plan was to lock him up until he could be officially given a sentence of life in prison."
"Why didn't he tell them that he didn't do it?"
Sasuke gave him an 'are-you-stupid' look. "He did, but he was covered in my parents' blood when the police found him, and he was fucked to all hell with trauma to form a decent defense for the first couple weeks. When he did get his head clear, the police were already convinced that he did it."
Kisame looked back at the photo. "How did he get out of prison?"
"Only a week after they sent my brother to juvie another murder happened the exact same way. Two sons in the family. The parents were killed with a single bullet through the head, like ours, and their bodies were found in the exact same position. Research into the case showed two other families were killed the same exact way since Itachi was detained, and digging about six months back they found out we weren't the first. Three months later they caught the guy with help from the FBI. Some serial killer psychopath, they said. He was charged with all the murders and given the death penalty."
Sasuke pushed hair behind his ear. "Because Itachi was a minor through all this, his name was never released, and any criminal record he could have had was permanently expunged by a judge before they could even properly form. So, legally, Itachi has an immaculate record despite it all. No record will show that Itachi was ever tried for murder or sent to jail, thank heaven."
"Where were you when this all happened?"
"Foster home. They weren't a bad family, but I was a little brat. I wanted Itachi, I wanted to live with him, not a bunch of strangers. When Itachi was finally released, they moved us to a children's home for a year so we could be together while they tried to find a home for us. When he turned sixteen, we were entered into some program designed to help orphaned children, and an apartment was rented for us. We got a stipend for food and clothing every month; Itachi immediately got a job." Sauske let out a little breath, leaning against the counter as he folded his arms. "We were finally alone though, out of the system, and it finally felt like…we could restart our lives without the whole ordeal being thrown in our face. As soon as Itachi became eighteen he filed to be my legal guardian."
Kisame took a deep breath, running a hand over his head. He didn't know what to say.
"Itachi hasn't really gotten a break since then," Sasuke muttered.
"I kind of inferred that," Kisame murmured.
Sasuke stared at the toaster for a second. He slumped away from the counter, snagging a plate out of the drawer, and tossing both waffles onto it. "Itachi's kind of fucked up, and sometimes I want nothing more than to punch a hole through his chest. Because he's my brother, and I love him more than anything else on this goddamned planet, yet he hates himself more than anyone else ever could." Sasuke looked up to meet his eyes, an expression so serious set into the wrinkled in his forehead he looked five years older. "Do you know how fucking frustrating that is?"
"I'm beginning to," Kisame muttered.
Sasuke looked at him for several seconds, his slow blinks calculating and searching. "Anyways, now you know. Whatever you do, just don't pity him. He doesn't like it, and neither do I."
"I wouldn't dream of it." He paused. "And, Sasuke?"
A raised eyebrow.
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For…trusting me. For letting me into your brother's life, for supporting him about it. Really."
"Yeah, well," Sasuke muttered, looking at the floor. "Who am I to get in the way of lo—" he snapped his mouth shut. "Itachi's happy. You don't seem like a complete piece of shit. What am I supposed to do?"
Kisame grinned a little. "Still. I appreciate the effort."
"Yeah, well. Keep the jokes reigned in and you won't be on such thin ice."
Kisame laughed as Sasuke left back into the hallway, grabbing the syrup bottle and flipping the cap. "You're a good guy, Sasuke," he called after him.
He expected the lack of response.
After he ate—not very much, he was still hungry after, so he would be ready to eat if Itachi wanted to have dinner with him—and afterwards he felt a little useless. He poked around looking for something he could fix. There was one cabinet with an off kilter hinge, and since Kisame had just left his toolkit there before he left for Upolu, he settled down to work on it.
He ended up having to remove the entire door and reconnect it.
Sasuke came out of his room once and gave him kind of a weird look, but other than that seemed to be satisfied that he was making himself some sort of useful.
He was just greasing the hinge when he heard the shuffle of a key in the lock.
"Babe," he greeted, great big grin on his face.
"What are you doing?" Itachi asked, tilting his head to the side as he closed the door behind him and took his shoes off. He headed to the kitchen, setting his keys down on the counter.
"I figured while you were gone I should do something to prove I'm not just mooching. I don't want Sasuke throwing me out on my ass," he joked, hopping off the counter and sliding his hands across Itachi's hips. "How was work?"
"It was work," Itachi answered, leaned forward for a kiss.
Kisame gladly complied.
"You didn't need to get involved with the cupboard, there," Itachi said after a few moments of kissing. "It really wasn't a bother."
"And it really wasn't a bother to fix. Is there anything else that needs tampering with?"
"No, Kisame."
"That's alright. I'll get the real list from Sasuke."
Itachi glared a little.
Kisame grinned.
"Are you tired?" Itachi asked eventually.
"I actually kind of just woke up," Kisame admitted, walking to the sink to wash his hands off.
"Your sleeping schedule is all messed up, now," Itachi chastised, tugging on a lock of Kisame's hair.
Kisame's smile was lopsided. "Yeah."
Itachi moved past him and to a drawer in the kitchen, pulling out coupons. "At least tell me you're hungry. Brickoven pizza down the street has special pizza deals every week, and I have some coupons for them."
He hummed. "Pizza? Yeah, I haven't had that for a little while. Sounds great," Kisame affirmed, coming up behind Itachi. He ran his hands over his shoulders, feeling the tightness due to stress and poor posture. "Remind me to give you a backrub sometime," he grunted, kissing Itachi on the top of his head. "You're tight—ah." He closed his eyes, pressing his lips together so he wouldn't laugh. "You're muscles are tight."
Itachi ignored it. "I'll try to remember that," he murmured, pulling his phone out of his pocket. "Sasuke likes Hawaiian pizza, but you don't like pineapple, do you." He twisted his lips to the side, looking at the toppings he could get at a deal. "Does pepperoni and onion sound alright?"
Kisame let out a breath. "Anything that gets me out of pineapple sounds like heaven."
Itachi laughed a little.
Kisame was slightly fidgety as Itachi ordered. He drummed his fingers along the tops of Itachi's shoulder. "Babe?" He started, voice quieter than he intended.
"Hm?" Itachi was relaxed by the pressure to his tense muscles.
"Uh." He cleared his throat a little. "Sasuke told me."
"Told you what, now?" Itachi asked, turning his head to look at him.
"About your parents."
Itachi nodded slowly. "Ah." He didn't look upset at all, which was relieving to Kisame. "I suppose it would be better told him his perspective, anyhow."
Kisame didn't know what to say. "I'm—uh—I'm sorry—"
"Shush, now," Itachi chided, squishing Kisame's face between his hands and kissing him on the nose. "You don't need to say anything."
"I feel like I should."
Itachi shrugged. "What is there to say?" He patted his face. "Besides—it happened so long ago."
"That…doesn't take away from…."
"From how bad it was. I understand." Itachi hummed a little. "Thank you for your consideration. Do you have any questions?"
"You sound like middle school teacher," Kisame said.
"I only don't want you to be left hanging."
Kisame ran a hand over his head. "No questions, I guess. I just…understand more about you, I think."
"You mean you understand why I'm so mentally unstable."
"Don't say that," he reprimanded with a frown. "That's not what I meant."
Itachi shrugged. "You know it's halfway true. Now, if we're done bickering about it, would you be willing to drive to the pizza place?"
Kisame smiled a little. "Sure thing." He grabbed Itachi's forearms. "Will you talk to me, though?"
Itachi raised an eyebrow. "I'm speaking to you this very moment."
Kisame rolled his eyes, releasing one of Itachi's arms to tuck dark hair behind his ears. "I mean about your parents."
Itachi paused. "What do you want me to say?"
"Anything. I mean—if there's anything you want to say. If you ever feel lonely or sad about it, or if you have uncomfortable memories—"
"You're awfully cute when you're floundering," Itachi said warmly, taking a step closer until Kisame wrapped his waist up in a hug. "I'll talk to you, if I need."
Kisame grunted. "Alright. I just want you to know that I'm here. Yeah?"
"Yeah," Itachi repeated, a little teasing. "I'm in a very good mood, though, so I'm not entirely keen on talking about it tonight."
"I picked that up," Kisame grunted, lips twitching. "Why are you in such a good mood?"
Itachi smiled, shoulders bouncing in a shrug. "You're here. I really did miss you, Kisame."
He grinned. "I missed you, too." He tilted Itachi's chin up for a kiss. "How should we celebrate our reunion, hm?"
Itachi pressed another kiss to his lips.
"Maybe you could celebrate by picking up the damn pizza."
Kisame raised his eyebrows, turning his head to look at the hallway. "Sasuke, you have the most unique timing."
He didn't look amused. "It's getting cold."
"Nonsense. They keep them shelved in those warmer things." He waved a hand. "The racks by the cash register."
Itachi sighed. "We're going, we're going."
"You're coming, too?" Kisame asked, catching Itachi's hand as he moved towards the door.
"Of course I am," Itachi replied, toeing his shoes one.
Kisame hummed appreciatively when Itachi bent over.
"No road head," Sasuke snapped as the door closed behind them.
Sign language was a wildly beautiful language, Kisame decided.
Itachi's hands were a beautiful flurry of movement as he smiled at his student. Her name was Alise, and she had golden hair curled into cute springs, which bounced when she nodded enthusiastically. Itachi was tutoring her in spelling; not being able to hear or pronounce words made it harder for her to understand, Itachi had told him before she arrived.
Kisame was lounging on Itachi's couch, sketchbook on his lap and expensive architect's pencil twirling between his fingers. He was trying to draw something for Itachi—rusty as he may be to freehand sketches, since he was so used to the straight, guided lines of blue prints—but could not seem to stop getting distracted.
Maybe he just hated taking his eyes off of Itachi.
It was hard to look away from something so beautiful, after all.
Itachi was especially beautiful, Kisame decided, when he was laughing halfway silently, fingers frozen in a sign. He was especially beautiful while his hands danced and taught.
Kisame wasn't sure if he was skilled enough to capture that magnificence with pen and ink, but he would try.
He managed to glue his eyes to his sketchpad, only looking up when he heard Itachi laugh.
It was nice, this weirdly domestic vive the two of them had picked up. Kisame laying on Itachi's couch, listening to him tutor and sketching absently. Itachi did his laundry for him and cooked (with much intervention from Sasuke and Kisame himself) for him and always gave him little kisses and asked if he needed anything.
Kisame could get used to it.
Kisame already was used to it.
Alise's appointment ended, and she waved happily to Kisame, who smiled and waved back, before she skipped out the door. Itachi cleaned up the table, putting his teaching materials away and brushing the eraser shavings off and into his hand, which he then dumped into the trashcan. The laundry dinged, and he disappeared out of the kitchen. Kisame's pencil was flicking lightning quick across his paper, shading delicately, when Itachi reappeared with a basket full of clothing, all Itachi and Kisame and Sasuke's clothes mixed in.
"Were you very bored?" Itachi asked, folding a pair of black jeans and starting a pile.
"Nah," Kisame replied, eyes critically scanning his piece and adding a few marks of detail. "It's nice lazing around." He looked up and grinned. "It's also nice watching you."
Itachi smirked a little, folding one of Kisame's tank tops. "What are you drawing?" He asked.
"Later, later." Kisame waved a hand and set the sketchpad face down.
Itachi quirked an eyebrow.
"Later." He scooted over on the couch and grabbed a pair of socks, pressing together and peeling down the top of one of them to fold them together. "Let me help." He muttered a little, "you work too much."
Itachi had excellent hearing. "I do not."
"You go from work, to work, to work," Kisame chided.
"Things must be done," he answered easily.
"You never take a break."
"I'm taking a break right now."
Kisame raised an eyebrow, pausing. "By folding laundry."
"By talking to you, my dear."
"Dear? Well, shit, when you say things like that I want to put you down on the couch and mess all these folded clothes up again."
Itachi sighed.
There was a knock on the door, then. Itachi frowned a little, cocking his head to the side.
"I thought you said Alise was your last tutor?" Kisame asked.
"She was." He set the laundry in his hands down anyways, getting up to answer the door.
He blinked, sticking his head out and looking to the side.
"Who is it?" Kisame asked.
Itachi hummed, closing the door and sliding the lock again. "I don't know, I didn't see anyone. Maybe they got the wrong room."
He was walking back to the couch when someone knocked on the door again. Itachi immediately spun back around, opening it up much more quickly this time, but there was still no one there.
"What's going on?" Kisame was frowning. He started to get up from the couch, but Itachi waved him back down.
"It's nothing, Kisame. Just some stupid kid playing ding-dong-ditch."
"You sure?"
"I'm sure. It's nothing but mildly annoying, so please don't fret," he reassured.
Kisame shrugged.
Itachi stacked up the whole of Sasuke's clothes and carried them to his room. Kisame was nearly done with the rest of the pile, his clothes on the coffee table and Itachi's on the couch. He offered to help Itachi put the clothes away, but he was sat down with a kiss to the temple, and left the room to take care of it himself.
Itachi must have thought that Samoa rendered him unable to do common household chores he had been doing since he was sixteen.
"Is it later?" Itachi asked, sitting down next to him on the couch and looking pointedly at the sketchbook. He tugged on Kisame's shirt sleeve.
Kisame chuckled, lifting his arm up so Itachi could fit himself against his side. "Promise you won't laugh?"
"Of course." Itachi set a hand on Kisame's thigh. "I didn't even know that you drew recreationally."
"I haven't since college, actually."
"You should take it up again," Itachi encouraged, finger flitting across the edge of the pad of papers, feeling the rough, fraying edges of the pages at the bottom. "And show me everything you draw."
Kisame snorted. "Should I?"
"Yes." He tugged on the book again.
"Fine, fine. You're so demanding," Kisame playfully chided. "Promise you won't make fun of me."
"I promise," Itachi said patiently and sincerely.
Kisame flipped the cover of the sketchbook open, carefully thumbing through the pages till he got the right one. He waited for Itachi to say something, got a little nervous when he didn't. "Itachi?"
Itachi's face was blank. Not carefully blank, not controlled, but shocked speechless.
"…are you upset?" Kisame asked eventually when Itachi remained silent.
"This is me," he whispered eventually, reaching out one finger to touch the page just a little.
"I know, baby. I drew it." But Itachi wasn't smiling, or anything, and it kind of worried Kisame. "Do you not like it? I, uh, just thought—"
"This is my face, and—you drew me," he said again.
Kisame tilted his head, watching him carefully.
"Is this how you always see me?" Itachi asked, taking the page into his hands and pulling it closer.
"What?"
Itachi met his eyes for the first time. They were swimming with…some swirl of emotions. "This is beautiful, Kisame. Is this how you see me?"
"Oh. Duh." Kisame chuckled.
Itachi stared at it for a second, tracing with his eyes the way Kisame drew his hair like moving ink across the page. The way his lips were slightly parted, the way Kisame shaded a light into his eye as he looked off to the side.
"Can I keep this?" he asked very quietly, pulling it towards his chest.
"Of course you can," Kisame replied warmly. "You like it?"
Itachi nodded. "I really, really, really do."
Kisame grinned. He ran a hand over Itachi's hair, cupping the back of his neck and pulling him in close. "I'm glad that you like it."
"I like you," Itachi blurted. One word off.
Kisame chuckled. "I quite like you, too."
One word off.
Itachi wrapped the vacuum chord around the handle and steered it towards the closet. Kisame had been staying at his house for four days now, and Itachi was getting maybe a little too used to having him on hand for kisses or snuggles whenever he so chose.
Even Sasuke was starting to get used to it.
Kisame still hadn't said that magic four letter word, but he was being ridiculously affectionate. Itachi was partly wondering why he was even being so adamant about it anymore.
But that was dangerous thinking, he decided. He was going to stick with his guns on this one.
"Hey, baby?" Kisame called, coming up behind him.
Itachi turned around to be greeted with that ever charming grin. "Did you need something?"
"Only you, always."
"Charming." Itachi let his smile have its way for a moment. "You were sayinh?"
"Mm," Kisame murmured. There was a little light in his eye, a sparkle that let Itachi know he was up to something. "There's something I have for you."
Itachi was wary. "Like a present?" Kisame had been in good mood all day, humming and grinning every time he looked over. Something was happening.
"Exactly like a present," Kisame confirmed, taking Itachi's hand and leading him to the bedroom.
"…you're not just going to take off your pants and show me your dick, are you?" Itachi asked cautiously.
Kisame laughed so hard he doubled over. "No, baby, not today. That would be a pretty great gift, though. Remind me to use it later."
Itachi raised an eyebrow, closing his bedroom door behind them. Kisame knelt down next to his suitcase and rummaged around in it for a few minutes, under layers of clothes. Eventually he stood up, an inconspicuous brown box in his hand, and motioned him to sit on the bed.
Itachi perched himself on the edge and Kisame sat next to him, a breathless grin on his face. His fingers twitched around the brown paper.
"What's going on," Itachi murmured, eyes flicking between Kisame's happy smile and the box.
"Don't look so frightened," Kisame laughed, "it's just a little something. I got it in Upolu." He held it out for Itachi to take.
The box was very light; at first, Itachi didn't even believe that there was something to unwrap. "Why did you wait so long to give it to me, then?"
Kisame's grin melted down a little into something softer and more genuine. "Because today is a special day."
Itachi tilted his head to the side, face nothing but confusion. He slipped one finger under the corner of the brown paper and tore it to the side. "Kisame, I don't want you spending money on me."
"I didn't spend a dime, baby, I promise."
The brown paper fell away to reveal a plain white box. Itachi flashed Kisame a look and pushed the lid off.
There was a rounded leather chord. There were four metal rings split in half by a beautiful white sharks tooth.
Itachi's eyes widened a little.
"I found it on the beach," Kisame started, a little quietly. "I told you that my cousin makes jewelry, right? I had her put this together for me."
Itachi stared at it for a moment.
"I thought it could remind you of me. Because…ya know, the whole shark thing."
Itachi looked up at him, fingers curling around the necklace. "I really love it," he eventually got out, voice sticking only a few times. I really love you.
Kisame grinned. "Yeah? I'm glad. Want me to put it on you?" He asked.
Itachi nodded, holding it out for Kisame to take and turning his back to him. He pressed his fingers to the tooth, biting a smile between his lips. "What kind of shark do you think it came from?"
"Blacktip reef, I'm sure," Kisame said, clasping it behind Itachi's head. He turned him back around, eyeing the way it lied on the hollow of Itachi's throat.
He looked ridiculously satisfied.
"You're kinda marking your territory with this, aren't you?" Itachi asked, a quiet smile in his voice.
Kisame grinned a predatory grin. "You're mine," he said, reaching out and grabbing Itachi by the shoulders to drag him in.
"You're a little possessive," Itachi noted, hips tightening when Kisame's fingers slipped their way under the waistband of his pants.
Kisame winked. "I'm pretty good at keeping it under wraps, no?" He situated Itachi's legs on either side of his until he was seated tightly in his lap.
Their lips met a little roughly, Itachi's hands not hesitating to make themselves at home in Kisame's hair. They kissed for a few minutes before Itachi moved his lips down Kisame's neck and throat, finding lovely little hollows and dips to sink his teeth or roll his tongue. Itachi didn't take the initiative much, so he thought it was about time to turn Kisame into the puddle of goo he was routinely made.
Kisame was grunting out sounds of approval and pleasure, which only spurred him on.
Kisame got tired of being passive, eventually, and pulled Itachi's mouth back to his, working his fingers under Itachi's shirt. Itachi, to his utter surprise and glee, happily pulled his shirt up and over his head, throwing it somewhere on the floor before desperately grasping onto Kisame's face again. Kisame's hands almost fluttered over Itachi's skin for a moment, hesitant, nearly afraid. He got his mind about him and gripped onto Itachi's waist, ribs, collar bones and shoulder blades. His fingers kept twitching inward a little, eager to turn into claws and mark that pretty porcelain skin. Later, he decided. Later when Itachi was naked and rocking under him. Later, when he had Itachi gasping for air, overwhelmed with pleasure. Later, when he could kiss and lick and fuck Itachi in every which way he could.
"You're hard," Itachi mumbled against Kisame's mouth, thumb pressing against the corner of his lips.
"Ah, shit," Kisame rasped, pulling away a hair. "I was thinking about how good you would look with nothing on but that necklace."
Itachi snorted, drawing back. "Maybe we should take a break, hm?"
Kisame reluctantly let him crawl out of his lap, but still kept him close, hooking Itachi's leg over top of his.
"Speaking of the necklace—" Itachi ran the back of his hand against his mouth, feeling the wetness slick across his skin. "You never did tell me. What is this for?" He pressed his index finger to the tooth.
"Can't it just be for fun?" Kisame asked, stroking his thumb across Itachi's cheekbone.
"But is it?" Itachi questioned.
A grin. "No." Kisame's hand dropped from Itachi's face, grasping his hand instead. "Happy six month, babe."
All forms of expression dropped from Itachi's face. "What."
"I'm not trying to celebrate it or anything, I just thought it would be—"
"Sixth month what," he asked, knowing the answer.
"Sixth month anniversary." He was grinning again.
"From when," Itachi stressed, feeling his heart start to pick up speed.
"From when you so graciously made out with me on the hood of my truck and agreed to be my boyfriend. Why?"
Itachi stared, wide eyed. "I…don't have anything for you."
Kisame snorted. "That's—"
"I totally forgot, Kisame!" Itachi suddenly jumped up from the bed, looking just a hair away from mortified.
Kisame rolled his eyes. "Stop being melodramatic and sit down, it's—"
"I'm sorry—"
Kisame grabbed both his hand and forcefully yanked him to sit back down on the bed. "Itachi. It is entirely fine." He tucked black hair behind Itachi's ear. "Most people don't even make note of sixth months. I just thought it would be fun…." He trailed off, a leering grin taking place again. "And I really wanted an excuse for you to wear this." He flicked the shark's tooth.
"I'll make it up to you," Itachi promised, scooting closer into Kisame's arms.
"You don't need to, how many times do I have to tell you that?"
"Well, I'm going to." He leaned against Kisame in full, bringing his knuckled up to kiss. "Can I tell you something?"
"Always," Kisame replied.
Itachi's lip twitched up. "I'm really happy," he said quietly, one finger lingering on the necklace.
"Yeah?" Kisame's voice was a little breathy.
"Yeah." He touched Kisame's cheek. "I keep thinking that I can't get any happier, that I'm the happiest I ever have been, and ever could be. And then you just make me happier." His voice was rather tiny.
"Um." Kisame's heart was overwhelmed, and it leaked out through his voice. He leaned his head forward to rest against Itachi's neck. "Ditto."
Itachi snickered. He spend a minute or two running his fingers through Kisame's hair. "Happy six month," he said eventually, quietly.
Kisame wrapped his arms all the way around Itachi, squeezing tight. "Mm. Sixth months. That sounds nice."
Itachi nodded. "It does."
Kisame ran his hands up Itachi's neck, cradling his face. His thumbs stroked Itachi's cheekbones, the rest of his fingers caressing the hard bone under Itachi's ear. Itachi's eyelashes fluttered a little bit, leaning his head into one of Kisame's palms.
"Do you want to try for another six?" Kisame asked quietly. "We can see how much more happy I can make you."
Itachi closed his eyes and smiled.
Kisame stood leaning against a wall in line at his favorite Greek restaurant, waiting for his order to be made. Itachi had booked himself all day with tutoring and wouldn't be done until evening. Kisame knew he would be exhausted and cooking would be the last thing in the world he would want to do—so why not surprise him with the world's best gyros?
He crossed his arms, already feeling warm in his stomach. His day improved so much when Itachi was with him. He felt good about having slept over at Itachi's place for so many nights, since it was a huge step for Itachi to let Kisame inside of his house. He thought about how Itachi slept and leaned his head against the wall. Itachi was warm and…floppy when he was sleepy. He dropped the layers of armor he carried around all day and melted into a more honest, blatant, and pliable person.
Damn, he wanted him back in his arms.
"You sleepin'?"
Kisame snapped his head up, blinking over at the voice that snapped him back to reality. "Suigetsu?"
Suigetsu grinned, a plastic take out bag handle wrapped around his fingers.
"What a coincidence," Kisame muttered, slumping away from the wall.
"Nah," Suigetsu shoved one hand into his pocket, "when you mentioned that you were getting Greek food to Mangetsu, he forced me to come over here and bring some to him for dinner." He shrugged. "How are things? I haven't seen you in a while."
"Pretty good," Kisame replied crossing his arms across his broad chest again.
"How's Itachi?"
Kisame grinned.
Suigetsu laughed. "Yeah? That good?"
Kisame looked up. "Itachi is…." Kisame didn't even have words.
"Sasuke hasn't scared you off yet?"
Kisame chuckled. "Nah. I'm not gonna let go of Itachi that easy. He kinda seems to have a habit of scaring off Itachi's boyfriends, though, doesn't he?"
"Sasuke's basically a human chastity belt for his brother. If a guy even looks at Itachi sexually Sasuke is there and he's not fucking happy, man." He laughed. "That kid can cockblock like a damn professional."
"He must really be trying, then." Kisame shrugged. "He showed the expected amount of hostility when I slept over, but nothing that bad. I think he's all bark and no bite, to be honest. I just play along with it at this point."
Suigetsu's eyebrows shot up his forehead. "You slept over?!"
Kisame grinned. "Yeah. For like, three days in a row, too. Itachi had me stay over after I got back home."
"And Sasuke didn't ever, like, try to cut your dick off?"
"What?" Kisame laughed a little. "Not at all. He even had the idea to set up an air mattress so that Itachi and I could sleep together."
Suigetsu had a surprised, goofy grin on his face. "Dude, I can't believe Sasuke didn't actually, literally murder you. Fuck, are you sure that was him? He must have had a fever. Especially after Itachi's last boyfriend, damn."
Kisame shifted forward. "What…do you know about that?"
"About what? Marcus?"
"I don't know his name," Kisame murmured. "Lots of stuff has been alluded to, that's all." He knew that he probably shouldn't find anything out from a source other than Itachi, but…
Suigetsu twisted his mouth to the side, looking up. "Sasuke was pretty much just one murderous frenzy during the time that Itachi and Marcus split. He was uncharacteristically tight lipped about it, so I can only guess that whatever happened was pretty hard on Itachi." He ran a hand through his hair. "I remember Sasuke saying that he didn't understand why Itachi was a magnet for abusive relationships."
Kisame raised his eyebrows. "Abusive?" He wasn't necessarily surprised, given what he'd picked up on but—hearing it still made his skin crawl.
"Yeah. All Sasuke told me was that the guy seemed really great at first. Was so good to Itachi, treated him like a king, all that. He was the first person to ever do that, so they trusted him too much. He ended up being a shitstain. Once Itachi had fallen for him gotten really serious, Marcus started guilt tripping him and manipulated. I don't know all the details, but I know that there was something to do with sex."
"Did—did he rape him?" The words burned his throat on the way out.
"Nah. At least, I don't think so." Suigetsu shrugged. "Sasuke mentioned more than once that Marcus 'got Itachi into bed,' so I can only assume that something was really fishy about the whole thing. There were bruises, once, too, but I don't know how any of that happened. Marcus just totally fucked with Itachi's psyche, no matter what happened. I think that was the worst part. Itachi got all jittery whenever anyone tried to touch him, even in simple ways. He was obsessed with staying clothed, wouldn't wear short sleeves. Sasuke found him fully dressed in the shower one time. Anyways, Sasuke became hyper protective of Itachi's sexuality after that."
Kisame stared at the ground, brows furrowed. The thought of anyone hurting Itachi, on purpose, just to do it, made his blood boil. "Itachi doesn't act that way, though. I mean…I can tell something happened, but he was always pretty adamant about his boundaries. He just sucks at asking for help."
"That's a good sign. But, Itachi—Itachi used to be in a really bad place. I mean, you can tell, right? He's…hard on himself."
Kisame immediately thought of when he slept over, and Itachi acted like he had killed a family of five when he forgot to mention he had a twin bed. Or when he fought with his brother. Or when they fought about groceries. Shit, there was a lot, actually.
"It used to be a hell of a lot worse. Itachi had exactly zero self-worth; even I could tell that without Sasuke clueing me in. Marcus showed him affection and Itachi just assumed that meant that he owed Marcus everything. But like I said, Sasuke never really told me much of the details. All I know is some bad shit went down."
Kisame's eyebrows stayed dented inwards. Itachi was ashamed of his financial standing and his work, he was uncomfortable with his body, he overreacted to even little mistakes he made…even on their first dates, Itachi couldn't seem to wrap his mind around the concept that Kisame was attracted to him.
Suigetsu looked lost in thought. "Don't take that lightly."
"Don't take what lightly?"
"How Sasuke is treating you."
Kisame cocked his head to the side. "What do you mean?"
Suigetsu shrugged a little. "I've been around Sasuke for a long time, and I've seen lots of guys fancy Itachi. Somehow all of them treated Itachi like shit one way or another, and Sasuke has all but barricaded Itachi off from potential lovers."
'It's been a trend of wasted time with wasteful people.' Kisame recalled Itachi saying, way back on their first date.
"I don't want to be fuckin' with you but—Sasuke doesn't just let people close to Itachi unless he thinks highly of them in some way. Trust me, he has put a few guys through hell. If he's giving you an easy time, if he's encouraging it, Itachi either really fucking loves you, or Sasuke thinks you're good for him."
Kisame kept his face schooled, but his fist tightened, hidden behind his thick arm.
Was Itachi in love with him?
Suigetsu grinned. "I'm not starting shit," he said, "I'm just telling you. Also, Sasuke's going to be a complete dick to me if you break Itachi's heart so—don't, uh, do that."
Kisame nodded. "Yeah. Good to know."
"Did I freak you out?"
"Huh?"
"You look pretty lost in thought. I'm not saying you have to marry Itachi, I'm just saying that, at least on Itachi's end this is a serious relationship. Don't be a dick, ya know?"
"Yeah," Kisame grunted. "I get it. Thanks." His number was called, then, and Suigetsu waved him goodbye as he went to retrieve his food.
He put the bag on the passenger seat of his truck as he started the engine. He pulled out of the parking space, listening to the crunch of the crumbling black top beneath the wheels of his heavy truck. There wasn't much good on the radio, but he fiddled through the stations anyway as he waited for an opening to pull out of the parking lot and into the busy, commuter filled streets.
Kisame thought a lot on the ride home. What Suigetsu said wasn't particularly news, nor did it scare him off or anything. It was just a heavy little ball in his stomach, a reminder. Kisame wasn't entirely sure why it was affecting him so much—Itachi was never a casual fling to him, Itachi was someone he legitimately and deeply cared about.
So why did he feel so weird all of the sudden?
A few minutes later he was rolling up into the parking lot of Itachi's apartment. He turned off the radio as he parked. He tried to shake off the feeling his in chest and he unbuckled his seatbelt and grabbed the bag of food, hopping out of the truck. He cleared his throat, as if he could physically dislodge the feeling and send it away. The truck beeped and the locks clicked as he walked to Itachi's door and knocked.
When the door opened, he was greeted with messy black hair and eyes filled with a subdued anxiety.
"K-Kisame?" Itachi asked breathily, confusion spreading across his face.
Kisame gave a little grin and held up the take out bag. "I figured you'd be tired. I brought dinner."
Itachi's eyes were wide and his lips were slightly parted, but other than that his face was blank.
Then he just—sank to the floor. "Woah—hey, Itachi," Kisame dropped the food on the floor and reached both hands out to stabilize him. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?" He gathered Itachi into his arms. "Babe?"
Itachi melted, burying his face into Kisame's neck. Kisame could feel uneven breaths on his skin as he held him.
"Shit, Itachi, talk to me." He tilted his chin up to meet weary eyes. "Babe?" he repeated in whisper.
"You—I was—" He wrapped his arms tightly around Kisame's waist. "I was just going to call you."
"Yeah?" Kisame asked, brow still furrowed in worry. "What's wrong, baby? Tell me what's wrong." He pulled him back up to stand.
"We have no food," Itachi said absently, letting Kisame's arms hold him up. "I forgot to buy groceries? I had no money so I kept putting it off…Sasuke didn't even eat breakfast this morning…." He ran a hand over his head. "I was just standing in the kitchen wondering how the hell I had forgotten to get my brother food," he swallowed, "and then I hear a knock on the door and I assume it's the landlord or something because how else could my day get any worse." He paused, looking frazzled. "But it's you, and you brought me dinner." He slid his hands to Kisame's cheeks. "How do you always do this?"
"Do what?"
Itachi looked for words for a second. "Know what I need and do it before I even ask."
Kisame just grinned. He kissed Itachi on the temple quickly and moved forward. "I'm just that good, Itachi."
He let out a sigh, locking the door as Kisame moved to put the food out on the table. He didn't respond, but instead moved next to Kisame, watching him remove the Styrofoam boxes and set them on the kitchen table. He looked upset.
"Don't like Greek food?" Kisame jested.
Itachi just stared at the table.
Kisame's brow furrowed, and he reached forward to touch Itachi's hair. "Babe?"
Itachi had his arms crossed tightly against his chest. "I should...I should have been able to do this. I should have been able to feed my own brother." He looked down.
Kisame paused, wadding up the plastic bags in his hands. "Why?"
Itachi looked up at him.
"Why do you need to take care of him completely?"
Itachi's expression twisted. "He's my little brother, Kisame."
"So why does that mean you have to do everything single handedly?"
Itachi paused. "It's my job to take care of him." His response was automatic.
"I know. But why do you have to do everything all on your own?" He let his hands move to Itachi's waist, pulling him in gently. "Why don't you ever let yourself rely on anyone?"
"I'm trying. But Sasuke is…a touchy subject for me."
Kisame pushed him up against the counter. "I know. And you've grown so much, and I'm proud of you. I just want you to know that you have me." He tilted Itachi's chin up. "You know that, right?"
"That's why I was going to call you." Itachi's voice was very tired, but his eyes had a little spark in them again, and his lips were tilting up.
"Hey, I mean it. There's no shame in asking for things. You can—"
Itachi's stomach took that inopportune moment to growl.
Kisame paused. "But maybe we should keep talking after dinner?" He winked.
Itachi called Sasuke out to eat and started gathering the plates from the cupboard, Kisame setting the drinking glasses down, as well.
A door opened in the hallway. "Nii-san?" Sasuke asked, a little confused as he walked towards the kitchen. "I thought we weren't having dinner."
"Kisame brought Greek food for all of us," Itachi explained, smiling as he turned around
Sasuke immediately went to the table, eyes widening when he saw the food. "I haven't had Greek food in forever," he said, opening a box. He picked up the gyro and took a gigantic bite, hunched over the table so anything that slipped out of the sandwich would land on the table, not the floor. "Fuck yeah," he muttered around a mouthful.
"Language," Kisame said out of reflex.
"And sit down. We're going to eat like properly, not hunched over the table."
Sasuke rolled his eyes and sat down.
Diner conversation was light and airy. Itachi got himself into a teasing mood, bugging Sasuke all about Naruto.
"You haven't had him over in so long, little brother. I nearly miss him." He chuckled. "Do refrain from telling him that, though, or I doubt he'll ever leave our apartment again."
"He's been busy," Sasuke grumbled.
"Trouble in paradise?" Kisame teased, dipping pita bread in humus.
"Shut up," Sasuke groaned. "We're just fine. He doesn't want to be harassed by you." He sent a pointed look to Itachi.
"Me, harass him? Now, Sasuke, he must be confusing us, because the only one who's done any sort of harassing to a boyfriend—" Itachi's phone went off in his pocket, then, and he paused in what he was saying to answer it. "Hello?" He tilted his head. "Hello?" After just another second he frowned and hung up. "Wrong number, I guess. Anyways, Sasuke—" His phone started buzzing again on the counter. He answered it a little more slowly. "Can I help you?" He started, a little more slowly.
"It's just a wrong number, Nii-san, ignore it."
Itachi frowned a little. "Someone's…breathing?"
"Hang up," Kisame said, reaching for the phone. "Don't fuck with that."
Itachi blinked as he ended the call, shrugging a little, and tossed it off to the side.
"Anyways," Sasuke continued. "Speaking of Naruto, he's thinking of having a party. Do you guys want to come?"
"A party?" Itachi questioned. "In his college dorm room?"
"Nah, Kakashi and Iruka are out of town and they said he could use their house."
Itachi hummed. "And what type of party is this?"
"Just a kick-back, Nii-san. No one will be there but people you know." Sasuke's eyes flicked over to Kisame. "Your boyfriend is invited, too."
"Well, I'm just touched," Kisame said with a grin.
Sasuke rolled his eyes. "There will be alcohol, though, so you can sleep the night."
"All of us?" Itachi asked. "They must have a big house."
"Not really, but we can all fit. There's a couple bedrooms, and you can bring air mattresses. And the couch pulls out."
"I don't," Kisame joked out of reflex, grinning.
Sasuke sent him a dead stare. "And you're uninvited."
Kisame's grin suddenly faltered. "Ah—uh, sorry."
"He was only kidding, Kisame," Itachi murmured, licking tzatziki sauce off of his thumb.
"Yeah." He shifted a little in his chair.
Itachi tilted his head. "Are you alright?"
"'Course," Kisame said before taking a big bite of his sandwich.
"Geez," Sasuke muttered. "Didn't know your balls were so soft. I can't joke around with you anymore?"
Kisame only shrugged.
Itachi narrowed his eyes. "No snarky comeback?"
Kisame shook his head, taking a drink of his water. "Nah."
"I just said 'comeback' and you're not going to touch it."
Kisame blinked.
"Oh come on, I'm setting you up so easily right now."
"Guess I'm just out of jokes," he said simply. He cleared his throat. "You better finish that gyro," he said, nodding his head toward it.
"Nice subject change," Itachi replied casually. "I'll eat most of it."
"All of it."
"Don't tell him what to do," Sasuke said pointedly. He turned to Itachi. "Nii-san, you better finish that gyro."
Kisame chuckled.
Kisame and Sasuke did in fact team up to bully Itachi into eating the entire sandwich, despite his numerous protests of 'my stomach will explode.'
His stomach did not, in fact, explode.
"I'll take care of the dishes, Sasuke, you go back to studying," Itachi said as he stood up to clear the table.
"Thanks for the food, Kisame," Sasuke called as he disappeared into the hallway.
"He's pretty much warmed up to me, hasn't he?" Kisame chuckled, gathering the plates and stacking them in the sink.
"Mm, I'm sure he would accept you all the way if you would cut out the innuendos around him," Itachi joked, turning on the water and soaping up a sponge.
"Oh." Kisame shifted uncomfortably. "Sorry about that. I'll, uh, stop doing it."
Itachi raised an eyebrow, handing Kisame a dish to dry. "I was only teasing, Kisame."
"Sure." He didn't meet his eyes.
Itachi tilted his head. The wheels and circuits of his mind were whirring. "Has something happened to you?"
"No," he answered easily. "I'm just trying to be mindful." He looked at his drying rag as he ran it over the rim of the plate."
"And you feel the need to be mindful all of the sudden, after months of making jokes." Itachi rubbed a sponge over the silver ware and shook them partially dry before handing them over.
"I just, uh," Kisame started. "I don't want to upset you."
"Don't you think I would tell you if you made me uncomfortable?"
"Yeah, probably."
Itachi gave him a weird look but otherwise dropped it. "Alright." Could Kisame have…? "Can you put these away in the cupboard?" He asked, gesturing to the stack of clean dishes drying on the counter.
"Yeah, sure thing."
Itachi washed the sink out and twisted the sponge dry. He folded the drying rag over the edge of the sink.
"So, how did you find out?" Itachi asked simply, kneeling down next to the cabinet under the sink to get the table cleaner.
"Find out about what?" Kisame asked.
"Marcus."
Kisame blinked.
"I'm not that oblivious, Kisame. The sudden sensitivity to your sex jokes? Your weird attitude since you got here? You have to know something."
Kisame didn't say anything for a moment. "I'm sorry, if you didn't want me to know. I shouldn't have—"
Itachi waved a hand, standing up with the bottle and the rag. "No, it's fine. I should have told you earlier, I guess, it just never came up." He paused and frowned. "It's not really the easiest thing to bring up out of the blue."
"You don't have to tell me if it's private," Kisame murmured.
"I want you to know," Itachi answered simply, collecting spilled bits of food in his hand. "I am curious how you found out, though."
"Suigetsu," he replied. "I ran into him while I was picking up the food. I just had all these bits and pieces and…."
"I understand." He sprayed down the table, mist pluming up from the wood surface in little billows. "Is there anything you want to know? I'm not sure what exactly Suigetsu knows."
"Did he rape you?" Kisame asked immediately.
Itachi jolted up, turning around. "What on earth? Did Suigetsu say that?"
"He said that he coerced you into bed."
Itachi frowned. "No, I would not use language as strong as that."
"Guilt tripped you?"
"That's a bit better, yes."
Kisame didn't look pleased. "That's still a really shitty thing."
"Be that as it may, I don't want you to get the wrong idea." He began to rub the rag across the table, flipping the rag over for the second half. "It wasn't that big of a deal."
"Itachi, are you—defending him?"
"What? No, of course not. I just don't want you to overreact."
Kisame sighed sharply. "Itachi, you're being biased about your own experiences."
"How does that make sense? Who else would know better than me, the one it happened to?"
"I just know how you are about these things," Kisame insisted.
"And what is that supposed to mean?" Itachi turned around, frowning.
"I just want you to tell me the truth."
"Are you implying that I would purposefully lie to you?"
"I'm saying that—"
"Stop," Itachi interrupted suddenly, shoulders slumping. "We're just…fighting for no reason. I'm too tired to argue with you right now." He ran a hand over his face.
Kisame relented after a moment. "Okay. Fine."
Itachi walked forward with a sigh. "I promise I'll tell you everything later. I'm just...right now I—"
"I get it; it's fine." Kisame reached a hand out, brushing against the side of Itachi's face. "It's fine."
"You're angry," Itachi inferred as he studied his face.
"I'm angry at him, not you."
"Will it make you feel any better if I promise that I know what he did was wrong?"
"Sure. But let's not talk about it if you don't want to. Are you done cleaning up?"
"Yeah," Itachi said after a moment. "Let me just put this away," he murmured, jiggling the surface cleaner bottle, blue liquid sloshing against the edges.
Once the kitchen was thoroughly cleaned, the two sat down on the couch, Kisame leaning back so Itachi's back could rest against his chest. Itachi flicked through channels absently. He could feel the anger tensing the muscles in Kisame's back.
"Are you still upset with me?" He asked, trailing his fingers over Kisame's wrist.
"I've already told you I'm not upset with you."
Itachi shifted a little, eyes flicking between the re-run of Scandal and the floor. "Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?"
Kisame nudged his nose against Itachi's hair. "No, don't worry about it, really." He let out a little breath. "It's…frustrating, that's all."
"What is?" Itachi asked quietly.
Kisame shook his head. "No, you said you didn't want to talk about it. So let's not." He kissed Itachi's hair, giving him a squeeze. "I mean it. I'll be fine in, like, two minutes."
Itachi frowned a little, but did acquiesce after a moment or two.
They watched TV meaninglessly for a while. Itachi didn't like it much; it just felt like wasted time. Kisame seemed much more content to bury his face in Itachi's hair then actually watch the screen, and Itachi hadn't seen a program in…well, it would be probably be years, if he could pinpoint the exact time. He dragged the blanket off the back of the couch, throwing it over his legs to keep them warm. Kisame noticed, pressing his legs a little closer.
Itachi hated fighting. Itachi was non-confrontational, would do nearly anything to avoid uncomfortable tension, especially with those he loved. Fighting with Kisame made him feel like shit, to be blunt, especially since it was so rare. It was awful, and the more he thought about it, the more he blamed himself. He shouldn't have been so secretive about it, that only made the big reveal more shocking to Kisame.
He wrinkled his nose.
"'Same?"
A grunt.
"Would you…." He trailed off, pursing his lips.
"Do you need something?" Kisame asked, voice a little softer. He removed his head from the back of Itachi's neck and rested his chin on his shoulder.
He shrugged. "Would you like to spend the night?"
He couldn't see it, but Itachi could just about feel the grin Kisame wore as he chuckled. "You really love me sleeping over, huh?"
"I've told you that I sleep better with others nearby."
Kisame kissed his cheek. "Course I'll stay the night, babe. You know I wouldn't miss holding you all night for the world."
Itachi leaned his head back and asked for a real kiss.
It was a little lighter after that, the atmosphere between the two of them, and they held hands as the TV continued to flicker and the clock ticked on. Sasuke came out at some point, seeking company, and sat on the floor. The three of them had an easy conversation, Itachi sitting up out of Kisame's lap so as not to bother his brother.
His phone buzzed in his pocket.
"Who's texting you so late?" Sasuke asked.
"It's the same number from before," Itachi answered.
"What did they say?" Kisame asked, looking over his shoulder.
"Nothing," Itachi offered with a puzzled voice, holding his phone out. "They're just blank texts."
Sasuke looked unhappy. "Block the number," he ordered.
"I've no idea how to go about doing that," Itachi replied.
"Give it to me," Sasuke muttered, snatching it from his hands.
Itachi sighed, reaching over to take Kisame's hand. "I'm sure you're overreacting."
"And I'm sure I'm blocking the number either way."
Itachi caught the phone when Sasuke tossed it back to him. "Thank you, little brother." He hummed for a moment. "I've been meaning to ask you, has the program picked their winning contestant yet?" Itachi asked.
Sasuke nodded. "They should be announcing the winner in two weeks. At least, that's when it's scheduled on the website."
"What's this?" Kisame asked, pressing his thumb against Itachi's palm.
Itachi turned to him. "Sasuke entered a special contest that awards huge scholarships," he answered. "He had to write a long essay and submit it along with a bunch of other character clarifying things, recommendations letters, financial documents, etcetera."
"Waiting for the results is like hell," Sasuke muttered.
"Well, if it's based on merit, you're a shoe in," Kisame told him.
"Don't jinx it."
Itachi rolled his eyes. "Thank you, Kisame. Sasuke only enjoys being difficult."
"Do I, now?" He sighed, leaning his back against the couch. "Itachi's been laboring away to put me through college. This is the one damn thing I can do to help out, and if the fuckers don't choose me—"
"If the judges choose someone else, you will continue through your education as if none of this ever happened," Itachi interrupted.
Sasuke glowered. "Yeah, but I'll be pissed off the whole time."
Kisame chuckled. "Then for all our sakes, we should hope you get in."
Itachi got sleepy in not too long, so they turned the television off and headed their separate ways for bed. It was kind of quiet between Itachi and Kisame as they brushed their teeth and changed. Kisame didn't have much to say, which wasn't bad, but Itachi couldn't help but think that he was feeling off.
"Could you braid my hair for me?" Itachi asked as they settled onto the bed in Itachi's room, tugging at the hairband at his wrist.
Kisame grunted, motioning him forward.
Itachi leaned into his chest, rubbing himself into place so he was comfortable. "Thank you," he murmured, one hand resting on Kisame's knee.
"It's good practice."
"Because you need so much practice braiding."
"You never know."
When Itachi's hair was done he got out of bed and turned off the light. Kisame was already getting under the covers when he slipped into bed.
Both of them were laying on their sides in the darkness, Itachi gazing softly at Kisame's face, enough mellow light to make out each other's facial features. Eventually Kisame reached a hand out to stroke Itachi's cheek, scooting a little closer.
"He told me it was the only thing that would make me worth it," Itachi said suddenly in a gentle voice, shifting on the bed.
"What?" Kisame asked, confused.
"Marcus."
Kisame shook his head. "Itachi, you really don't—"
"I'm telling you, Kisame."
He went quiet for a second. "What would make you worth it?" He asked hesitantly, quite sure he wouldn't like the answer one way or another.
"Sex," Itachi answered. The word was splintered in his mouth, a delicate project gone wrong that still nicked the edges of his tongue.
Kisame's eyes flicked up, one hand shirking across the bed to touch Itachi's fingers.
"That's how it started, at least. I was a virgin when I fell in love with him and had all these…hopeless romantic ideas about how it should be your first time. Candles and rose petals—something like that. Not in a grimy bathroom stall of a sleazy bar," he snorted a little when he said it, and then went soft in his voice again. "He was so respectful when we started dating, never pushed for anything when I held back. But then, that day, he took me to a bar, drank too much beer, and pinned me in the bathroom, and when I told him I didn't want to sleep with him—at least not there—he said, 'What other reason would I keep you around? Are you ever going to be worth my time?'"
And Kisame's heart broke just a little bit—not because of what Marcus told him, but because Itachi had it imprinted in his memory word for word.
"It surprised me, at first, but then—I just went with it, and figured he would explain himself later." He huffed out a chuckle, darting his eyes away from Kisame's. "It was awkward, which is probably obvious, and it hurt so bad I remember wondering why anyone would ever do it on their own volition. I kept telling him it hurt, and he assured me it was fine even though I could feel the blood dripping down my legs a little."
Kisame's entire face blanched. "What the fuck, Itachi?" He whispered.
Itachi looked up and shrugged—just shrugged. "It wasn't that bad, but I'm sure you aren't supposed to bleed."
Kisame reached forward and pulled Itachi closer. Protectively, defensively.
"It wasn't as bad the next times. He did it right—or, not right, but at least didn't make me bleed, I suppose. I didn't want to get back in bed with him, but he kept saying 'don't you love me?' and 'this is what lovers do.'" He ran a hand over his face. "I went along with it, but the more it made me want to crawl out of my own skin every time he so much as looked at me. I started panicking when he took me home with him, even faked having the stomach flu once just so he wouldn't touch me."
Kisame's jaw was locked, trying to channel all the emotion he felt in that one moment, trying to hold back all the questions, all the insults he could pour out. Instead he carefully lifted his hand up, running it along Itachi's neck, knuckled brushing his skin along the way, and settled on his shoulder. He nudged forward just a little closer. "But he didn't rape you."
"No," Itachi said slowly, "not rape. I consented to everything, even if it was less than pleasant sometimes. It was just…."
"Manipulation," Kisame finished for him, eyes tracing the thick eyelashes fluttering against Itachi's cheek.
"Yeah." He paused. "But that was just the sex," Itachi whispered.
"There's more," Kisame responded quietly, thumb rubbing gentle circles into the soft skin of Itachi's shoulder.
Itachi's gaze was steady, calm. Reassuring, almost, and Kisame knew he would be near raging if Itachi wasn't so…grounding. "I suppose it was all your text book stuff. He told me how to eat and dress, when I could go out and do something. He yelled at me for no reason, always told me that if I loved him I would do what he instructed." He picked at the seam of the pillow his head was resting on. "Called me stupid, invalidated my opinions. If I ever became upset with him, he would twist it around until he could blame me for the whole situation."
Kisame's eyebrows drew in. "And it never bothered you?"
"…honestly? Not really. It wasn't until—" Itachi broke off, wrinkling his nose. "I used to work at a bookstore in Greystone. He came in one day and brought up my parents. Related some book on the shelf where a main character's parents died to me. And then—said something really causally, like 'oh, just how you killed your parents, then?' Something like that." He sighed. "My coworker was a really sweet girl, but what are you going to do when you hear something like that? Marcus kept going on about it, how I orchestrated the whole thing and—" he cut off for a second and cleared his throat. "He said that I did it all to cripple Sasuke, to hurt him—" his voice caught in his throat.
Kisame near yanked him into his chest, anchoring Itachi's legs down with his own. "I know, baby, you would never," he murmured into his hair, giving him a squeeze. "Fuck," he hissed. He was angry, and his fingers were twitching every now and again, but he wasn't going to lose it when Itachi was pouring his heart out.
"He started trying to convince me that I did it. Told me that he knew I did it, that I was lying, and only started telling other people because they deserved to know the truth." He paused. "I almost started believing him. He was quite a convincing person."
"And you just let him?" Kisame asked.
"No," he started, shaking his head which was still buried against Kisame's neck. "After I got fired from the bookstore, which was expected, I realized that things needed to come to an end. I was…scared," he said the word slowly, like he was trying to find the right one, "so it took a lot of courage the day I told him we were breaking up." He sighed a little. "That was the first and only time he ever hit me."
Kisame grunted. "Suigetsu said something about bruises."
"Yeah. I think that Marcus thought he had a deeper hook in me. He never guessed that I would pull away on my own."
"What did he do?"
"Originally, he tried to force himself on me."
Kisame pulled back to stare at him. What bothered him the most was how Itachi said it so casually, like it didn't really matter.
"He did not succeed."
"I gathered that," Kisame grinded between his teeth. "What happened?"
"Well—Marcus was physically stronger than me, but I was much more coordinated. He got a couple of blows in—I believe that he was trying to render me unconscious—but I managed to get far enough away from him."
"And…?"
"And…that was kind of that. I told him to not come near me or Sasuke ever again. I left his house, and he didn't try to follow me. Sasuke was…relieved, to say the least, when I told him the news, and as soon as the month was over and we could leave the apartment, the two of us packed up and moved here."
"And he never tried to contact you?"
Itachi shook his head. "Thank goodness."
Kisame looked over Itachi's shoulder at the wall for a few seconds. "C'mere," he eventually muttered, pulling Itachi into his chest and holding him close. Itachi relaxed into him, nuzzling the top of his shoulder and humming.
Kisame was nearly trembling from everything he had just heard, he was so upset, so angry, so in pain….
And it was then, in that moment, with so many different things running through his head and his heart, that he understood the strange feeling in the car.
He was completely, and hopelessly, and undeniably in love.
He loved Itachi like he didn't know he could love another human. He loved him fully, every little piece of him, even the broken pieces, even the bitter pieces. He realized he had probably felt that way for a really long time, but it just now hit him, and he had to hold Itachi tighter just to stay grounded with how forceful it was.
The words came bubbling to his lips, but he choked them down, forced himself to hold it within himself. Itachi had already had an emotional day—Kisame wouldn't throw anything else at him. And it was an awkward time; he didn't want it to feel forced. So he would wait. He was okay with that.
"Itachi?"
"Hm?" Itachi hummed, tilting his head back and nudging Kisame's chin with his nose.
"Why did you stay with him?"
"With Marcus?"
"Yeah. You did…know that what he was doing was wrong, right?"
Itachi hummed, lips finding a small little hollow under Kisame's jaw. "No, at first I didn't. It made sense, how he said things. We were in a relationship, he was my boyfriend, so he deserved sex whenever he felt like it and I didn't get a say. I thought that was just how relationships worked, and he had the right to control me." He pulled back just enough to look Kisame in the eye, pressing a hand to his face. "I know it will upset you, Kisame, but I did love him."
Kisame's grip tightened a little darkly.
"And I thought he loved me back, I really did."
"But—Itachi—" Kisame didn't want to upset Itachi again, he didn't want to argue. He just could not fathom how any of this made sense in Itachi's mind. "How could you think that he loved you? You had Sasuke, you had to know the difference between actual love and…pure malice."
"Well, yes," Itachi agreed, not very defensive at all. "He never told me that he loved me…." He trailed off all of the sudden, looking lost in his own world of thought that Kisame couldn't peer into.
"Babe?" He nudged his nose with his lips.
"Ah, sorry, I was thinking about something."
Kisame sighed. "Alright, well—once you did understand how fucked up he was, you still stayed with him."
Itachi was very quiet. "Yes."
"So—why."
Itachi fingers picked at the hem of the pillow his head was resting on. "I don't want to tell you."
Kisame stroked a steady hand over Itachi's black hair, staying calm. "And you don't have to if it will upset you. But I really wanna know, babe, I'm not going to pretend that I don't."
Itachi pursed his lips. "You'll be very angry with me."
"I'm only angry at him, not you."
"We'll see," Itachi muttered. He took a little breath, avoiding eye contact. "After…Sasuke understood what was going on, he went crazy. He confronted Marcus, threatened him and cursed at him. I thought…I don't know what I thought. I don't know why I didn't trust my own brother, but I didn't. If Sasuke had said, 'break up with him for me,' I would have. But it would have broken my heart, and Sasuke would never manipulate me like that. I was just blind to what was going on." He sighed. "I became so hyper-aware of my own naked body, because of how awful it made me feel when he touched me, I refused to ever undress. One day I was standing in the shower with a pair of jeans and a button down shirt on—" He smiled a little, but Kisame didn't see what was humorous, "—and I realized that something was wrong."
"And your first logical thought was to keep dating him."
Itachi rolled his eyes up to glare at him. "You are being awfully rude."
"I'm sorry," Kisame grit. "I can't help it."
Itachi shifted a little, pressing a hand against Kisame's chest. His lips smiled fondly of their own right when Kisame took a hold of it, keeping it pressed firmly against his heart. "I stayed with him because…I didn't think that I would get any better than him."
"…excuse me?"
"I—"
"You thought that someone who regularly abused you was the best you would ever get?"
"I told you you'd be mad," Itachi sighed, eyes still diverted.
"'Infuriated' is a better word."
"What would you like me to tell you, besides the truth?" Itachi asked.
"I'd like you to tell me that you know how bullshit that is now," he ground out.
"I do know," Itachi replied aloofly. "I think that it's hard for someone who has never been in that position to understand how one thinks."
"Itachi," Kisame started. "You are—you are so much, Itachi, how can you not understand that? You are smart beyond words. You're thoughtful and considerate, you have a diamond heart and a golden soul and—" He buried his head into Itachi's neck. "You are so beautiful. In every way." He kissed his skin softly. "I—" he didn't finish his sentence. "The fact that you ever thought that you deserved to be hurt makes me—" He cut himself off again, letting out a sharp exhale. "Well, I'm sure you can tell."
Itachi began combing fingers through his hair. "Thank you, Kisame." He snuggled a little closer. "I'm not going to pretend I completely…see what you do in me. But—sometimes, when you tell me how wonderful I am, I believe it." He paused. "If it makes you feel any better, if you ever tried to pull that I would have kicked you to the curb."
"Good." Kisame nuzzled his throat. "I swear, if I ever see Marcus I'm gonna kick his ass," he grumbled.
"Please do not," Itachi quipped lightly. "He will likely charge you with assault."
"I could break his neck with one hand."
"You surely could. But I don't approve of physical violence."
"No? I got into lots of fights in high school."
"I can imagine," Itachi said dryly. "Please, I ask, do not fight anyone on my behalf."
"I promise…with the exception of Marcus."
"But—Kisame," Itachi sighed a little abruptly. "Part of the reason I don't make a big deal out of this is because I don't take to feeling like a victim. Someone hurt me—okay. But that's it. I'm not a victim, or a survivor. It just happened, and that's all I want it to be."
Kisame pulled away to stare at him in the quiet darkness. "Alright."
And, again, he felt the words bubble to his lips. I love you, Itachi, I fucking love you so much. But it just felt…wrong to say it now, after all that, after Itachi's entire heart and souls was spilled out and sticky all over the bed in between them. "Alright," he said again, voice only a little thick. "That's fine."
"Thank you," Itachi murmured, settling down on his pillow.
A pause. "I still might kick his ass, though."
Itachi snorted a little. "Shut up and come snuggle."
Kisame did, and Itachi slept very well that night.
