Chapter Six
Sometime during that night, Buffy awoke to sounds of whimpering with her enhanced hearing. She got out of bed to see who it was and found the sounds coming from Fred's room. She went inside to see Fred tossing and turning in her bed, muttering incoherently. "No no no." "Stop!" Fred cried out.
Buffy couldn't take it anymore and gathered up Fred in her arms. She quietly offered her words of comfort, trying to make her feel safe. "Shh. No one's going to hurt you. You're safe now. You're not in Pylea anymore." She kissed Fred on the forehead and rocked her gently. Eventually, Fred quieted down and Buffy went back to her room.
The next day Buffy woke up and got ready for her first official day of work. She went downstairs and made herself some cereal and coffee for breakfast. A short while later, Fred came down the stairs. Tara and Willow were still asleep.
"Hey there. How are you feeling?" Buffy asked concerned.
"I'm fine. Was I dreaming you in my room or not?" Fred was still a little confused.
"You were having a nightmare and it woke me up. I went into you room to check on you and calmed you down before I left."
"Sorry." Fred put her head down.
Buffy took her chin and lifted it gently, looking into Fred's eyes. "Hey, it's okay. I get nightmares too. There is nothing to be ashamed about. Okay?" Fred nodded. "Good. I need to go to work and I'll probably patrol after so I'll be back late. Don't wait up for me alright?"
"Okay. I think I'll go to the college and see if I can get a job in the science department. Do you have a computer so I can make a resume?" Fred asked.
"Yea, you can use the one in the office. Everything in there should work. If you have problems, I'm sure you can fix it or get Willow to help you. Now I gotta go or I'll be late." Buffy ran out the door.
Later, Fred went to the college and found a job in the science department. They were impressed with her credentials and gave her a job as a researcher. They also allowed her to apply for several grants so she could continue her studies. She couldn't wait to tell Buffy her good news.
Buffy walked through the cemetery on patrol after she got done with work. She had grease and all sorts of grime in her hair and she hated it there. The manager was an ass. She was feeling sorry for herself when she came across a certain platinum haired vamp.
"Hello luv." Spike greeted.
"Spike. What are you doing here?" Buffy asked.
"Just doing a quick patrol. You know fighting evil and all that rot."
"Great. Must be fulfilling." Buffy snarked.
"Have you told them where you really were yet?"
"No, and I don't think I will anytime soon. Why?"
"Just wondering why you saw it to tell me?"
"I had a lapse in judgement."
"Really? Or could it mean something else?"
"Like what?"
"Like maybe you want to lose yourself in the darkness and I can help you with that. You belong in the dark. You know you haven't felt like yourself in a long time." Buffy knew this was partially true. She did feel like she came back wrong, and she did want to hide in the darkness. It would be so easy to give in, but then she thought of Fred and her resolve kicked in. Fred represented everything Buffy needed: hope, life, light, and love. She'd choose that over the darkness that was threatening her anytime.
"Listen up Spikey, I'll never want to be with you. Just get over it and move on already."
"Then why did you confide in me and not your precious Scoobies?" He sneered. "You know why? It's because you can see darkness in yourself. You see yourself in me."
"That's crap. And guess what? You aren't the only one that knows my secret. Fred, Cordy, Gunn, and Wesley all know where I really was." Spike's face fell. "Yea, guess you aren't as special as you thought huh? Spike, just leave it alone. I appreciated everything you did to help, but I will never be with you. Ever!" Buffy turned around and headed home leaving a sulking vampire behind.
It was after midnight when Buffy walked through the door. She was exhausted and frustrated at the same time. Buffy had worked from the time she left in the morning until 8pm. Then she after work she went on patrol until now which had her all worked up with no release. She went upstairs, grabbed her pajamas, and went into the bathroom for a long, self-gratifying shower. Thirty minutes later, Buffy felt slightly better and could only feel her tiredness pushing through. She slipped into bed and fell asleep.
Buffy was happy. She was laying out in the sun. Her mom was sitting on the porch drinking iced tea. Her cousin, Celia, was laying right next to her. They were just enjoying the warmth. Buffy knew that her sister, Dawn, was okay. She felt herself drift away in peace. She could hear her mom and cousin calling her name, but she couldn't answer.
She woke up gasping for air in a dark place. When she tried to get up, she realized that she was trapped, buried in a coffin. She began to scream, punching the box, crawling out, digging her way through the dirt.
Buffy woke up gasping and clawing at the air. She was soaked in sweat and shaking. She turned to her nightstand to look at her clock. It read 4:45 am. 'Shit! Another nightmare. There's no way I'll be able to sleep now and I have to be at work at 9. Guess I'll go make me some coffee and breakfast.' Buffy got out of bed, brushed her teeth, and started to go downstairs when she heard whimpering coming from Fred's room again. She quickly went into the room to see Fred tossing around. As she did the night before, Buffy gathered Fred into her arms and rocked her gently.
Fred woke up to see concerned green eyes staring back at her. "How are you feeling?" Buffy inquired.
"Better. Thanks for being here." Fred said softly.
"It was no biggie. Want to talk about it?" Fred shook her head.
"Okay. Do you want me to leave?"
"No, I feel better when you're here." Fred glanced at Buffy. "I'm sorry I woke you up again."
"You didn't. I had just had my own little nightmare and couldn't go back to sleep. I was about to go downstairs when I heard you. Sure you don't want to talk about it? You might feel better."
"I will if you tell me about yours. Deal?" Fred wheedled.
"Alright. You first." Buffy sighed.
"Okay." Fred took a deep breath before explaining her dream. She told Buffy of how it was when she first arrived. She was made a slave and had to wear a shock collar. Everytime she did something wrong she would get shocked. A lot of the times she was shocked just because it gave her owner pleasure. It was so bad that she thought her previous life was fake. She finally ran away, but spent a lot of the time hiding in a cave. Buffy just sat and listened and rubbed Fred back soothingly, occasionally kissing her on her forehead to give comfort.
"It was horrible. Sometimes I think I'm going to wake up and find myself back as a cow." Fred sobbed.
"Ssshhh. It's okay baby. You're here with me and you're safe now. I won't let anything happen to you." Buffy held Fred with one arm and used her free hand to run through Fred's hair.
"I know you won't. I always feel safe when I'm with you." When Fred got herself together, she told Buffy, "Your turn."
Buffy chuckled. "It started off nice. I was with my mom and my cousin and just laying around soaking up the warmth of the sun. Then I start drifting to sleep with them calling my name. Next thing I know, I'm gasping for air and digging myself out of my grave. I woke up in bed clawing at air and drenched in my perspiration."
"I'm sorry that you had to go through that. You must have been so scared." Fred stated.
"Well your life hasn't been roses either. But yes, I was terrified. I thought I was kicked out of Heaven and landed in Hell. I think that waking up in a coffin with no air made me slightly claustrophobic." Buffy said sadly.
Fred looked at Buffy and said, "Well I'm always here for you if you need to talk."
"Same here. I think we can help heal each other."
"Thank you again for seeing if I was okay." Fred pressed her lips against Buffy's softly.
Buffy tightened her hold on Fred and deepened the kiss, running her tongue along Fred's mouth begging for entrance. She slipped her tongue in when Fred complied, sensually massaging Fred's own tongue with hers. They battled for a little while before running out of breath. When Buffy finally released Fred, she smiled at her. "I hope I can get more thanks like that in the future." Fred blushed, but smiled in return.
"I think that can be arranged. I've been wanting to do that for a long time." She said shyly.
"You and me both. I think I've wanted to do that the moment I walked into the Hyperion and saw you." Buffy told her. "Do you want to go get something to eat?" Fred nodded.
"Sure. Let me make a quick trip to the bathroom first." Fred got up and left Buffy in bed. Ten minutes later, they made their way downstairs for breakfast.
Since Buffy wasn't a great cook, she made the coffee while Fred made them eggs and bacon. "Mmm... Smells good sweetie." Buffy wrapped her arms around Fred and nipped her ear lightly. Fred let out a soft moan.
"Keep it up and I'll burn the food." Fred admonished. Buffy snickered and ran her tongue lightly along Fred's ear. Then she gave her another quick nip before letting go.
"Do you want to patrol with me tonight?" Buffy asked as they were eating.
"When?" Fred responded.
"After I finish work, I can come here and pick you up." Buffy answered.
"Alright. Oh I almost forgot! I got a job at Sunnydale University as a researcher. I start there tomorrow."
"That's great! Are you just working during the day or will there be night shifts?"
"I'm not sure yet. I think it's mostly during the day."
"Well if you end up working late, let me know and I'll come and get you. I don't want you out at night on your own. It's too dangerous, even with your cool weapons. Promise me?
"Okay I promise, but if I'm out late, then we patrol together."
"Deal." Buffy leaned over to give Fred another kiss.
"Buffy---" Dawn interrupted. They broke apart blushing. "Oh my God! I didn't see anything. I was never here!" She started to back out.
"Dawnie, don't be ridiculous. Yes, Fred and I were kissing. I like her and I hope you aren't going to make a big deal out of it." Buffy stated.
"Uh, sure. I have no problem with it. Fred is nice."
"Umm. Thanks?" Fred said hesitantly.
"Sure thing. Buffy, when did you start liking girls?" Dawn wondered.
"I dunno. I guess there might have been an attraction with Faith, but she went evil so I never tried to explore it. I've never really looked at another girl except for Fred."
"Well I am happy for you if you guys are happy. What are you going to tell the others?"
Buffy looked at Fred who shrugged. "I'm not planning on making a huge announcement, but I'm not hiding anything either. I figure if they ask me, then I'll answer, but until then we'll just go on as we were." Fred shook her head in agreement. The Scoobies made her nervous and she didn't want to do the whole spotlight thing.
"Huh. I hope I get to see their faces when they figure it out." Dawn squealed excitedly.
Buffy shook her head in exasperation. "You're evil. I gotta get ready for work." Buffy got up and gave Fred a hard passionate kiss leaving her dazed.
"You're in deep, aren't you?" Dawn smirked. Fred blushed.
"Yea, I felt something the first time we met and when I first saw her practice Tai Chi, I knew I loved her. She was so graceful. It was like a beautiful dance." Fred confessed. "I don't want to seem pushy though. I don't wanna scare her off.
"I don't think that you have to worry. I've never seen Buffy look so at peace before. And she's not one to show her feelings, so the fact that she kissed you with an audience without any shame, says a lot." Dawn said reassuringly. "I know Buffy feels something important for you because she didn't try to hide it." Fred gave her a soft smile. 'Oh yea, she's a goner.' Dawn mused.
