Mako: Here we are, again, in Chapter 7. Continuation of the last chapter. Warnings: swearing, just plain weirdness. Sorry if it's confusing, which I guess most of our chapter are. Unless you read the last one. To prevent major confusion, read pervious chapters if you have not done so yet. Also, the drunk talk might be a tad confusing.

Nova: And if you haven't you better read them. Cuz I guess this chapter is weird, Kirby rapping, Link dealing, Jigglypuff modeling, Pikachu in a bubble, etc. So, now start reading!

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Mako: *running away from the male Smashers, including Zelda, who is now Sheik, and is male, and thinks he's Spiderman* Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh! Help *pant* me *pant* Nova *pant* or*pant* Chaos *pant* One! *pant*

Chaos One: *pops up* What'd you want? *gets trampled by the Smashers chasing Mako, now he's a puddle* I'm guess that's your problem *pops back to normal shape, and changes huge and steps on them all, thoroughly soaking them, since he is made of watery stuff. But they only get up and start running even faster*

Mako: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!! You're no *pant* help!

Mario: *falls back down from the stratosphere and lands in front of the Smashers and they all trip over him*

Mako: *jumps onto one of Nova's platforms* Safe. Thanks Mario I mean Mr. Top Secret!

Mario: *gets up and brushes himself off* No problem. Did I miss something?

Mako: *hiding on her platform*

Nova: Geez, who'd have thought they'd ALL go after her, I mean, even the gay one…

Luigi: I wasn't chasing-s her I was ….uh…. chasing-s Black Market Bob-s.

Link: *runs away in terror*

Nova: Get back here. Luigi if you even touch anyone, I'll be forced to kill you. Something I will take very much please in. *flies up to Mako* Gay people are the face of evil.

Mako: But normally Marth and Roy are gay.

Nova: … Luigi is the face of evil.

Chaos One: *somehow gets up there* And what an ugly face it is.

Nova: *flies back down* Now, it's time for you guys to get wardrobe changes and houses.

***later***

*once again, all the Smashers are assembled in the town center in new wardrobes, and Mako is observing from a safe distance*

Peach: *wearing a long, black, hooded grim reaper robe, black nail polish, and she's dyed her hair black* Much better. Now I won't get kicked out of the Goth club.

Link: *wearing a black hooded sweater, dark baggy jeans with 25 pockets, both on the inside and out* Jacked up, good to go.

Kirby: *wearing a big, purple pimp hat with a giant pink feather. He flashes a smile showing sharp, platinum teeth* You like my sharp, platinum caps? Well now I'm ready to rap!

Ganondorf: *dressed in a red Roots jacket, white shirt with a Canadian leaf on it, faded blue jeans, and a toque and has a giant ax slung over his shoulder* If you people are sacred of this ax, you guys are pretty wimp, eh.

Captain Falcon: *has a shirt tucked in his plaid pants, and has giant Coca- cola glasses*

Samus: *surprisingly not wearing her suit, but is dressed in a typical cheerleading uniform, pompoms included* Ready? Ok!

Sheik: *decked out in the, you guessed it, Spiderman costume. Big surprise there* I'm ready to protect Gotham city!

Nova: This is Faketown.

Sheik: I'm ready to protect Faketown!

Nova: Plus, Batman protects Gotham city.

Sheik: I'm ready to protect Batman! …. Wait a sec…

DK: *comes out wearing cardboard boxes wrapped in aluminum foil, and has a little box cut out in the front so he can see* DK-turned-on.

Nova: That doesn't sound right *sweatbubble*

Bowser: *comes out with two giant plastic butterfly wings taped to his back and starts running around in circles flapping his arms*

Pikachu: *rolls out in the bubble, looking much like a hamster in a rolling ball, which is pretty accurate*

Falco: *wearing a fake gray mustache and gouty which look very wrong with a beak, and a red jacket with black dress pants*

Marth: *wearing a blue trench coat, blue spy hat, blue combat boots, and blue pants. The pants are unidentified for now*

Roy: *has the same things as Marth on, only red*

Roy & Marth: *both glare at each other and look suspiciously at each other*

Mewtwo: *dressed up as…. Himself, except the top of his head is painted purple to look more Frieza like*

Yoshi: *has a Toon Blue Eyes White Dragon costume on, and then he looks at Nova* Oh my Exodia! It's the Black Skull Dragon!!

Nova: *looking around* Where? Where?

Yoshi: *points straight at Nova* You!

Nova: *points at himself* Me?

Yoshi: *nod* And I must destroy you! White Lightning! *picks up a screwed up ray gun which fires white shots and shoots at Nova*

Nova: *blink, blink, totally unfazed*

Yoshi: Hm, change of plans! Dragon Headbutt! *headbutts Nova, but does nothing except bounce off of Nova's chest*

Nova: *sweatbubble* Um…….. Super Black Kick? *kicks Yoshi and he flies away and the sound of someone loosing Life Points is heard, and then there's a big white flash*

Young Link: *for anyone who's seen 'What's the Andy?', he looks like that, baggy jeans, white t-shirt with red on the sleeves, bottom and collar of the shirt, plus, backpack and no hat*

Luigi: *has an earring in the right ear, yellow t-shirt with a happy sun on it, and pants*

Mario: *wearing a black tux, and dark sunglasses*

Dr. Mario: *giant headphones on, Echo pants, shirt, sweater, undies… didn't need to know that…*

Pichu: *looks the same as normal, only wearing a backwards baseball cap, and does some more moves*

Popo: *has a fake mustache on, black cape, top hat, your regular villain get up from really old cartoons* Nia, nia, nia!

Nana: *wearing a Nun's full nun outfit complete with rosary* Return to the light my children!

Nova: *glare* Oath of silence.

Nana: ………

Ness: *slicked back hair, cape, and looks much like a vampire* My army of ghost men shall destroy you all! *evil cackle*

Nova: Hm, I wonder if we got any spare straight jackets around here…

Jigglypuff: *looks much the same, except has a designer bow on her head, which is a plaid of a bunch of pastel colours*

Fox: *has a bandana on his head, jacket, turtleneck, and fancy pants*

Nova: Ok, now that that's over with… go home!

Peach: What do you mean go home?

Nova: Go home!!! I said GO HOME!!!

Link: Ok, what should we do now?

Mako: *from on top of her platform* Go home!

Marth: Why?

Mako: Because I said so!

All guys: Ok! *run home*

Girls: *go home because they got nothing better to do*

Nova: How come they listen to you?

Mako: You mean you haven't even noticed yet? The guys are like all in love with me.

Nova: Scary, although it may have some advantages.

***even later***

Nova: *calls to everyone over a speaker thing* Come out of you houses now!!!!

*everyone come outside and into the town square*

Nova: Ok, so we have a little problem now. When I said go home, I mean to go to your real home.

Link: What are you talking about? We don't got any houses here. And, how are we suppose to know which houses are ours?

Nova: *looks at the houses and that have giant banners on them that tell them which house belongs to who* You guys are truly pathetic… *sweatbubble*

Fox: Oh ya, I knew that. I just didn't say anything to see if I could fake everyone else out.

Nova: Oh ya, Kirby, you don't live in the frat house.

Kirby: But I don't mind the strippers in my house, and the occasional mouse. But I'm ok, cuz I can still hire some anyway.

Nova: Ok there. You may think your rich… but you live in a normal house. *points to a neon purple house with a FOX banner on it*

Fox: But that says it's my house… *scratches him head*

Nova: Ya, it is your house. But RaP-tOr lives in your house, in a cardboard box in the basement.

Kirby: That's not cool. Now where do I put my pool?

Nova: No, I was lying. You live in the house behind it. *points to giant purple mansion with RaP-tOr on a banner*

Kirby: Whoo Hoo!!! *runs away to his mansion*

Fox: So, that means the neon purple house is… mine?

Nova: Ya.

Fox: That's not fair! I wanna live in a big house too! *pulls out a cell phone, dials a number, and millions of people come, tear down the house, and fly the White House in and place it on the spot where the neon purple house used to be* Much better. *walks into the White House*

*George Bush walks out* What! No! My white house!

Fox: George, common, you're a party person. You aught to live in a frat house!

George Bush: Wait a second, you're going to make me act like Bill Clinton. Wait, you're the one who destroyed his career.

Fox: *smile and nod*

Nova: That's enough of the prez of the US of A…. *pulls a cord and George Bush falls into a hole and ends up…. Somewhere else. Nova salutes and starts singing* Oh say can you pee! On American property.

Mako: Nova, stop. Or else we'll get a flock of patriotic Americans sending the mafia after us.

Nova: *stops* Wait, does America even have a mafia?

Mako: I dunno, I think they're in Afghanistan now.

Nova: Stop lying.

Mako: Who's gonna stop me?

Nova: The secret service. Not like they got anything better to do…

Mako: Ya, I guess you're right. It's not like Osama's gonna catch a plain to the US.

Nova: Ya, they got that Osama watch set up and all…. Damn the Royal Canadian Air Farce is hilarious!

Mako: Unless he's already here…. I think he was my taxi driver last night… @.@

Nova: Ok, that's nice. Now, everyone go to your LABELED houses. Good bye.

*all leave to their house, except Young Link who pulls out a roll of toilet paper and grins evilly. And Marth and Roy who are chasing each other with guns trying to blow the other up*

**even even later**

Nova: We gathered here today, to mourn over the departure of many people. Due to alcohol poisoning, from beer that is so strong which is illegal. Except at this bar.

Fox: Then why can we drink it here.

Nova: Because Faketown has all the best things in the world.

Fox: Hm, that's a pretty good slogan. Wonder why we don't get tourists….

Nova: That's because… uh… Faketown… is uh…. Only open to the ….uh… best of the best.

Kirby: He's right. I am the best. I deserve better then all the rest.

Nova: Ok, so now the Ox bar.

Falco: Why is it called the Ox bar?

Nova: Because our beer is stronger then an ox.

Ganondorf: Then must mean we're in Canada. Welcome to my country. Wait, my homeland! Where have all the trees gone?!?!? *breathes* Oh wait, you people are just pulling a funny, eh?

Nova: How do you figure.

Ganondorf: Oh, well in Canada, we have a little thing called pure air.

Young Link: Oh, what's that?

Ganondorf: It's the best thing you've even breathed. The smell of fresh pine in the morning.

Link: I resent that! Through extensive studies I have found out the smog and pollution is healthier!

All: *sweatbubble*

Nova: Actually, we ain't in Canada, home of the strongest beer, or the USA. We're in Dragonia. We're actually in a small box which is also portal into an alternate universe. Now, get in there and drink!

Roy: What do you mean? *glares at Marth*

Nova: Man, you guys are dense. I mean, go in there and drink so much you can't remember you where ever drunk.

Marth: And how much would this be? *glares at Roy*

Nova: Dude, you guys ask too many questions. You guys totally wasted after about 3 bottle. You'll be so wasted the janitor might mistake you for garbage. Actually, I bet 10 buck no one can drink 10 bottles.

Everyone except Ganondorf: Score! 10 bucks!

Ganondorf: Eh, I can drink more then 10 beers. If I drink more than 25, you have to pay for all the drinks.

Nova: You're on. No one can last that long! Now, go and DRINK!!!!!

*inside the bar*

*everyone sits down somewhere and drink…*

*10 minutes and 3 bottles each later*

Marth: *drunkenly talking to Roy* You know wut I hate aboot you…. You likesh blue sho much…

Roy: *half awake* But, you likesh blue…

Marth: Wut yoush talkin abootsh. *hiccup* I likesh red…

Roy: But, yoush wearin all *hicc* blue…

Marth: Wut yoush talking aboutsh boy. I likesh yellow….

Roy: At leasht I'm not wearing gold shequin pantsh.

Marth: *looks down* I aintsh wearin no gold shequin pantsh either… he ish. *points at Link who is indeed wearing gold sequin pants*

Marth & Roy: *burst out laughing and soon pass out from lack of oxygen to their alcohol fogged brains*

*somewhere in another corner of the bar*

Kirby: *dancing on top of a cooler with a wasted Jigglypuff*

Jigglypuff: *giggling madly the whole time she's dancing with Kirby*

Mewtwo: *looking around drunkenly at the crowds until he spots Young Link* Ack! It'sh Goku! Why won't yoush leave me alone! *charges up an energy attack*

Young Link: *looks around* Goku! Wheresh… *looks down at himself and starts thinking he's Goku out of drunken stupidity* You shall neversh defeatsh me evil Friezer!

Mewtwo: Die! *fires his attack and Young Link who drunkingly dodges the attack and it hits Kirby, who is propelled backwards and falls, bringing Jigglypuff down with him*

Young Link: You cansh hit da drunk monkey! Now eatsh my attack! *throws a blue rubber bouncy ball at Mewtwo while yelling 'ka me ha me ha' but Mewtwo drunkenly dodge the bouncy ball which pegs bartender, who is Bill Clinton, and it bounces off his head and hits the cooler which survived Mewtwo's attack. Since the ball was also wasted, it thought it was a bomb and blew up the cooler*

Mewtwo: I'msh ash slippery ash a shtoned shalamander!

Kirby: *picks himself up off the ground and help Jigglypuff up* What! No! I had moola in dat coola! Frieza you gonna die, since you made my money fry!

Jigglypuff: *giggles more and hangs off of Kirby's arm half awake* My hero! *gives him a quick peck on the cheek*

Kirby: *smiles at Jigglypuff, but then pulls his face off and throws it at Mewtwo like he does when using the cutter power in Kirby 64*

Mewtwo: I didnsh knowsh you could throwsh your face.

Kirby: *catches his face and puts it back on* Same with me, my hommie.

*elsewhere*

Ganondorf: *making a pyramid out of all the beer cans he's drank so far*

Nova: *staring at him in amazement* He's had 15 so far, and he's not even fazed. Damn, they must have some really strong beer in Canada. *takes a look at one of the cans. It says 'Imported from Canada'* … figures…

Nana: *sitting there not drinking a drop* Drinking beer is sacrilegious!

Link: *stumbles by* It dependsh on you're religion! *hiccups and stumbles away, tripping over a chair which magically appeared there…. Actually is was shoved in front of him by one of Ness' minions and does a face plant on the floor*

Nana: Drinking beer shows no respect for your body! And since we are all temples of God, he resides in our souls. If we a disrespect to our bodies, we are disrespecting God since he is part of our very existence!

Link: *rolls back over to this area and stands up* Ya! But we'sh can alsho dishreshpect other peoplesh bodish too! *hiccups and leaves once again* Yoush knowsh wut I'm shayin?

Nana: All of our actions show the attitude we have towards God and all of creation! The commandments sent by God call us to respect human dignity and-

Nova: Enough preaching. You're still on that oath of silence if I'm not mistaken.

Nana: *pretends she hasn't said anything all day* ………..

Mario: *standing by the door and acting like a security guard now*

Pichu: *bounces by singing* They call me Sonic, cause I am faster then sound, I keep on jumping around! *starts jumping from table to table* Blue hedgehog Sonic, with incredible speed, I'm moving my feet! *starts shuffle dancing on a table*

Dr. Mario: *walks up to a turn table and puts on some of his techno music to drown out the sound of Pichu's drunken singing*

Pikachu: *sitting depressed in a corner since it can't seem to find a door to the bubble and can't get any beer inside until Pichu jumps onto the top of the ball, and the movement causes Pikachu to start rolling away* Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!! Help me!!!! *crashes into a wall and lays there knocked out* @.@

Captain Falcon: *sitting at a table reading a book about physics* I have no time to idly sit around and let precious time slip away! I don't need those frivolous things. *goes back to reading his book and doesn't even notice Pichu hop onto the table and start doing a shuffle dance again*

Bowser: *running around in circles pretending he's flying* Fly, fly, buttafly! *sees a spill on the table where Marth and Roy are passed out and starts drinking the beer off the table thinking it's pollen from a flower* Whee! *hicc* Fly pretty buttafly, fly! *starts looking for more spills to drink from* Ooooooooh, light… *looks at the light and jumps at it and gets shocked* Ouch! *looks back at the light* Oooooooooooh, light. *and the process repeats itself*

DK: *helping the bartender (Bill Clinton) serve drinks to the already drunk Smashers* DK-help-by-serving-beer. *slides and glass of pop down to Luigi who's barely had anything so far*

Luigi: *smiles* I just love watching people get drunk. Not only is it amusing, but you can actually get guys to sleep with you if they're wasted enough. *looks at the others and smirks*

Yoshi: *creeps up on Nova and jumps onto his back*

Nova: *looks at Yoshi* Um… Ultimate dark wings slap. *flaps both of his wings together and hits Yoshi from both sides*

Yoshi: @.@ *falls off of Nova and lays there on the ground, twitching every once in a while*

Nova: He's just getting sad. *grabs a beer and goes to drink it, but shakes the beer bottle, lights a fuse into it and throws the bottle at Yoshi* Flaming cocktail!

Chaos One: Huh?

Everyone else conscious: Cocktail! *somehow manage to run toward it*

Mario: *walks out the door*

Nova: Clinton! Dive!

Bill Clinton: *turns around in slow motion* What the hell!

Nova: *does a slow mo dive at Clinton and grabs Chaos One at the same time*

Chaos One: *totally lost and surprised* What the fuck!

*meanwhile the bottle is spinning around and spewing out flames and it hits Yoshi, who gets his ass lit on fire, and he flies away through the ceiling. Once again the sound of loosing life points is heard over the techno music*

Mario: *walks back into though the door after he hears the explosion and takes his position by the door again*

Falco: *starts talking to Link* I think that you're abusive behavior of alcohol may have something to do with your childhood. Tell me more about yourself.

Link: Yoush watsh to knowsh wut I hate aboot you? You alwasyh makin fun of doesh childrensh.

Falco: I think this obsession with children, comes from a tramatic childhood of your own. Now come and tell me more. *motions for Link to sit down, who complies and lays down between two chairs facing each other*

Ness: *sitting at a table chatting away to his ghost friends who no one except him see, making him sound more insane then everyone previously thought him to be* Oh Charlie! How many drinks have you had? *pause* Wow, that many eh. I didn't even know you guys could get wasted, let alone eat or drink! *pause* Geez, ok. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you guys. Want another drink? *beer bottle floats in the air and the beer magically disappears*

Everyone: How does he do that?

Nova: *turns around and looks at Charlie* Charlie, don't hit me.

Ness: You can see them too?

Nova: Sure, I got magic, so I can see them. Mako probably could too if she was here.

Chaos One: I can see them too!

Nova & Chaos One: *go and sit with Ness and his ghost friends and starts talking to them*

Samus & Peach: *sitting at table talking to each other and laughing at the stupid things the others are doing*

Sheik: What are you all doing? Drinking like this is illegal! I'm going to have to arrest you all.

Mario: *walks up to Sheik and puts him into a head lock while a ghost comes and forces Sheik to drink all of the beer*

Sheik: *gets as drunk as everyone else*

Nova: Guess that Spiderman can do illegal things too. But it doesn't matter since it's legal here. Plus, no one needs to drive home, so no drunk driving!

Samus: Wow, where did you get those clothes! Black is so your colour!

Peach: You think so? I always heard black makes you looks fat.

Samus: Nonsense! You look great.

Peach & Samus: *keep talking about girly things like that*

Ganondorf: *making a 9 story pyramid out of all of the cans he's had* Looks like you got the tab, eh Nova?

Nova: *grumbles*

Dr. Mario: *changes the music to dance music, so anyone who's conscious and able to walk can dance*

Pichu: *stops singing and bouncing from table to table and starts break dancing*

Kirby & Jigglypuff: *start dancing too since they lost their cooler to dance on*

Samus & Peach: *shrug and gets up and start dancing too*

DK: *starts doing the robot behind the counter and spills half of the beer, which Bowser comes and drinks up*

Fox: *walks up to Samus and asks her to dance. She agrees and they start dancing together*

*Bunch more people join in too and soon all of the conscious Smashers are all dancing together, most of them drunkenly*

Popo: Hahahahahahaha! *grabs a keg and ties it up and places it onto train tracks he painted on the ground*

Everyone: No! Not the keg! *all run at him to try to save the keg*

Fox: I know what to do! I'll just copy that big dragon dude. *grabs a beer bottle and it starts spewing out fire and the keg ignites and everything starts burning and they all start cheering*

Mario: *grabs a fire extinguisher*

Nova: You guys are wasting beer…

Everyone: Nnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrr! *all start trying to put out the flames*

Nova: *signs and summons a bunch of robots to come and fix everything. Minutes later, everything looks brand new*

Kirby: *walks up to Dr. Mario and shoves him out of the way and starts talking in a microphone* Yo dudes, you wanna hear my verbal cruise?

Chaos One: No!

Kirby: Did I hear a yes?

Chaos One: NO way!

Kirby: *starts singing anyways*

Sometimes when I don't rhyme,

I sit around, watchin' the town,

That stupid cheerleader's doing her cheer,

While I'm sitting here, guzzling a beer.

Spiderman's swinging around,

Kinda flying around, above the ground.

Trying to bust Black Market Bob,

Who's only tryin' to do his job.

That Goth is ridin' around on that horse Binky,

And Fox just made a major stinky.

I sit around, watching the neighborhood,

While that psychiatrist's talking about childhood,

And that butterfly's trying to fly,

While there's a battle between the blue and red spy.

They're all trying to get that chick Mako,

While I'm sitting with Jigglypuff my ho,

And there's that creature only known as Nova,

And I just found a four leaf clova'.

He's working on that GS machine,

Pikachu's telling me keep my words clean.

And there's that stupid DK cyborg,

And I'm bribing Nova to chuck him in a gorge.

And there's Joe that lumberjack,

Maurice's pulling up his nerdy slacks,

And then there's that water guy Chaos One,

That little short guy's pulling pranks for fun.

Luigi's the gay guy,

Who I just love to fry.

And D.M. only plays techno,

But everyone eats my dust wherever I go.

Pichu's a midget break dancer,

But if you ask me I can do a backspin faster.

Mewtwo thinks he' from an anime,

And for blowing up my cooler he's gonna pay.

Man, I'd pay to see that show,

And I'd bring my bodyguard Mario.

Popo thinks he's a western villain,

Even though he ain't done much killin'.

Nana's a nun who's holy,

But she's seen more porn than me boyee.

Yoshi's a mental retard,

Obsessed with those Duel Monster's cards.

And Ness is a psycho,

That I sadly know.

They're all crampin' my style,

And they're all in denial.

Cuz I'm cooler then them.

They got nothin' to defend.

And they're all a bunch of fools,

Except for Black Market Bob, he's cool.

Whenever you see me, you better bow,

And that's it boy-ohs and gurli-ohs, chow.

*runs off the mini stage*

Nova: That was… interesting. Oh well, you guys can all go home, and sleep, while I'm off!

Ganondorf: Where too?

Nova: Oh, I have to work on a little…. Project. I need parts for it. So I have to go, and since Mako's hiding on her platform…. As scared as I am to say this… Chaos One…. You're *gulp* in charge.

Chaos One: Whoo hoo!

Nova: *flies away to wherever he's getting his parts from*

Mako: *waves goodbye to him from he platform* Bye!

Chaos One: *sees Nova's gone and grins evilly. Then he runs up to a keg and jumps on it* You are conquered! *hops off and runs away to conquer more things*

Link: Dude, let's go and get some more beer man. *talks to Fox who agrees and he walks up to the keg*

Chaos One: *appears out of now where* Don't touch the keg! It's mine! I have conquered it! I have conquered the beer inside, I have conquered the metal shell, I have even conquered the nozzle!

Link: Ok there… *backing away slowly*

**********************

Mako: Another chapter done! Um, sorry about the cracks about the presidents of the USA, but we thought I'd be funny. Blah.

Nova: It was kinda short, well, by our standards anyways.

Mako: Ya, but we're trying to cut down a bit. Um, if anyone had problem understanding the drunk talk, just tell us and we can put a little translation thingy beside all of it.