Disclaimer Apologies to Ian McEwan, who wrote a wonderful book, to Christopher Hampton, who wrote the script. Thank you to Joe Wright for his vision, and to Keira Knightley, James McAvoy, Romola Garai and the rest of the cast for bringing Joe's vision to life.

All rights to those who own them. I claim nothing.

A "What if...?" Story. "What if Robbie made it home?

Love Never Dies

by

Ninja Elizabeth

Chapter 7: Home

Cecilia arrived at the Tallis house lodge that belonged to Grace Turner. She visited Robbie's mother as often as she could but felt that it wasn't enough. She wanted to do so much more for her. The last time she visited was shortly after learning of the Army's withdrawal from France. She had left with some hope that Robbie might be coming home. She knocked on the door but there was no answer. Having a key, Cecilia let herself in and called out in case the older woman was taking an afternoon nap and had not heard her knock. No answer. She set her overnight bag down by Grace's favorite chair, and proceeded to the kitchen. By the looks of the dirty dishes in the sink, Grace had an early start and rushed to the main house.

Taking off her coat and placing in on the back of the chair, she returned to the kitchen to wash the dirty dishes.

After the dished were dried and put away, she gathered up her courage and swallowed a bit of pride, making the decision not to wait for the older woman but to seek her out. This meant walking down the Surrey path to the main house. Cecilia wanted to see Grace and tell her the news about Robbie personally. She did not want the older woman to hear the news from anyone else. Perhaps she would attempt to make amends with her family or at least pay them a visit. She would need their support after all if she and Briony had any hope of freeing Robbie.

As she locked the door behind her and turned toward the path she looked down at herself and laughed. She was a far cry from the slightly snobbish, defiant rich girl who lad left home five years ago. The only thing the dress she now wore had in common with anything she had worn back then was that it was green. It was plain and simple, almost cheap by comparison. The green halter gown she wore for Robbie would cost her today about three months rent at least. Her hair was longer and her make up more subtle. She no longer felt the need to impress anyone.

She walked down the path toward the main house. Her thoughts turned to Robbie. How many times had he made the same journey? He must have made the journey hundreds or even thousands of times. She thought of him making what would end up being his last journey that fateful afternoon, in his best suit, full of anticipation and fear, while she was in her room feeling the same trying to find 'the perfect dress' from her wardrobe.

Crossing the bridge over the dried overgrown creek bed, Cecilia realized that she was further down the path than she had ever been since leaving home.

The house she had sworn never to return to came into view. It was ugly. It had always been ugly, but it was once her home. Once her home, she thought as she got closer. It was no longer her home and she didn't' feel right merely entering it as she had when she lived there. Knocking on the door would be uncomfortable, and there was the possibility of a confrontation she was not ready for, so she opted to enter by the servant's door which led to the kitchen.

Grace Turner had finished polishing the last of the silver. She had saved the spoons for last. As she set them aside to set the table later, the door opened.

Betty turned angrily to yell at the twins who had been running about all morning long. Both women were stunned not to see the twins but familiar young woman enter.

"Cecilia?" Betty asked.

"Cecilia!" Grace responded.

"Hello, Betty, Grace." She replied noticing the polished silver. "What's the special occasion? I know it's not for the prodigal daughter's homecoming because I wasn't even planning on coming to see Grace until yesterday and I didn't inform her of my change of plans."

Betty grumbled. "Paul Marshall and his new bride are here for dinner. Everything must be perfect for 'Mr. Prima Donna' and your cousin 'Mrs. I'm rich, you're not and I don't have to work, you do.' Not that she does or ever has done anything. The twins have been running wild since breakfast and have already blasted through the kitchen more than once. The only ones they listen to are your father who has yet to arrive and your mother who is in her room claiming to have one of her migraines again."

Cecilia resented Betty's remark about her mother claiming to have a migraine. Having inherited her mother's tendency to suffer from the painful and often times debilitating headaches she felt the need to defend her. "Betty, I can assure you that my mother would not shrug off her responsibilities claiming to have a mere headache. Believe me, at the moment she is the first person in this house who would like the twins to stop running about."

Grace turned to Cecilia with the look of a worried mother. "Cecilia? Do you suffer from migraines as well?"

"Yes, I do." She answered. "In addition to the throbbing headaches, Betty, often comes sensitivity to lights and sound. And occasionally, even nausea."

Betty apologized. She explained that it was just all the built up frustration. With all the demands of the guest of honor who had arrived late last night and the uncontrollable twins, she was at her wits end. "The twins are spoiled brats. They take full advantage of your mother's migraines and father's absence. When your cousin is here all hell breaks loose as she tells your mother that she is being too harsh on them. She won't take them in because 'taking care of young children' is beneath her, yet she won't let anyone 'take care of them' when she is here. The war is keeping your father working late at the Ministry. Paul Marshall of course can't be bothered as he's a millionaire and has his factories to attend to. All he seems to do if you ask me, all he does is wave his money around and your cousin loves to spend it."

Cecilia felt a knot in the pit of her stomach. Paul Marshall it seemed had already had his claws into her family permanently by marrying her cousin Lola. Had he charmed his way into the hearts of her other family members as well? Did she and Briony really have any chance of proving Robbie's innocence?

"Are you all right, Cecilia? You look a bit pale." Betty asked.

Before Cecilia could respond, the servant door swung open wildly and the twins burst into the kitchen covered in mud. One of them was holding a frog from the bog.

"Stop right there!" Cecilia responded with the authority she used in the hospital ward.

To the amazement of Grace and Betty, the twins froze in their tracks and looked at Cecilia.

"How dare the two of you enter this kitchen covered in mud! Do you want mud in your soup?" Cecilia responded in a firm authoritative tone.

"N-no, ma'am." one of the twins replied.

"And what is the purpose of bringing that frog inside? Would you like Betty to clean it up and cook it for your supper?" Cecilia teased.

"No!" The twin holding the frog responded clutching the frog to his chest.

"Well then, I suggest to two of you march out the way you came, leave the frog outside and clean yourselves up before entering this kitchen again." Cecilia ordered. "And the next time you choose to set foot in here, I expect the two of you to act like proper gentlemen. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, ma'am." the twins replied in unison before turning to leave in a hurry, slamming the door behind them. Only a puddle of mud where they had been standing was left as evidence that they were there only moments ago.

Betty was stunned and began to laugh. "Well, that was different. How did you do that?"

Cecilia chuckled. "Ward Sister mode." she answered. "I never imagined I would need it outside of the hospital."

"You're a Ward Sister now?" Betty asked quite impressed.

"Yes, I am." Cecilia replied. "I was working at the EMS hospital near Morden until about a month ago. I'm back at St Thomas at present."

"I believe that is where your sister is doing her nurses training." Betty responded. "Did you know that she did not take her position at Cambridge? Your father was quite upset."

"Briony found my address and sent me a letter, so yes on both accounts." Cecilia replied.

Grace turned to Cecilia. "So what made you decide to walk all this way to the house? You know you are more than welcome to make yourself at home in the bungalow. That is why I gave you a key."

"I wanted to talk to you, Grace. I didn't want to wait because I wanted you to hear the news from me, not someone else." She replied. "Betty, may I steal Grace away for a few moments?"

Betty looked at her kitchen and all the work that still needed to be done. Her two kitchen hands were busy. With the twins' intrusions and Paul Marshall's insistence that everything be perfect for his bride and constant changing of the menu things were a little behind schedule. "Can it wait until later, Cecilia?" Betty asked. "We are already behind schedule and you are taking away my 'right hand'."

"I promise it won't be long. Give me a few minutes and then I'll bring her back and lend a hand."

Grace hoped Betty would say yes. She was anxious about Cecilia coming to the main house and now the news she had had to be about her son, Robbie. She wanted to know; was it good news or bad news? Either way she did not want to wait until they were allowed to sit down and have supper.

"You can't help!" The head of the kitchen exclaimed.

"Why not? I don't live here anymore." Cecilia responded. "I don't mind. I like being in the kitchen. Granted I never have the time or money to prepare anything fancy, but I can hold my own. I'm not the same person I was five years ago. Just tell me what to do, Betty."

Betty smiled. Cecilia had changed. She could see that. "All right. You can take her aside for a few minutes, but when you return, Cecilia I'm going to put you to work. No favors."

"I understand. We won't be long. Like I said, I just want Grace to hear things from me, not on the wireless, or unfriendly ears."

"We have a lot of work to do, and we do not want to disappoint 'his highness'." Betty replied as Grace and Cecilia walked out to the servants' dining area.

Cecilia chuckled. "Tell me, does he still have pubic hair growing out of his ears?" she asked as they disappeared into the dining area. She heard Betty burst out laughing. She took that as a 'yes'.

Cecilia turned to Grace. She could already see that the older woman feared the worst about what Cecilia was going to say.

"It's bad news, Cecilia, isn't it?" Grace asked.

"Not entirely." Cecilia replied. "I'm not here to tell you that's he's dead. He's alive. However he's not coming home just yet."

"Has he been sent out again?" Grace asked very worried about her baby boy. "Where has he gone? I worry about him so much when he's out there somewhere fighting."

Cecilia took a deep breath. "He's back in prison. They took him back this morning."

Grace did not know whether what Cecilia had told her was good news or bad news.

"I got to see him, Grace." Cecilia responded. "He was brought to St Thomas and I nursed him back to health."

Robbie's mother smiled. "He must have liked that." she replied. She didn't know what she hated more, her son falsely imprisoned or off abroad fighting the war. At least in prison she didn't have to worry about him being left behind, and forgotten... just another fallen soldier.

"He asked me to marry him." Cecilia smiled. "Naturally, I said 'yes'. I don't know when we will officially be able to marry, but now we are officially engaged. He said he wanted to marry me in one of his letters from the field."

"That is wonderful. You know I consider you my daughter already. I know you will make my son a fine wife." Grace replied. "I hope I get to witness the two of you getting married one day, even it's in prison."

"Briony and I are going to do what we can to free him, Grace."

"Briony?" Grace asked. "Have you forgiven her? I won't hold it against you if you have, but I don't think I can."

"I haven't forgiven her, but I have accepted her apology. She's my little sister, Grace. She's going to tell the truth in front of a solicitor and change her evidence. If we can get the case reopened I have two soldiers who are willing to testify as character witnesses on Robbie's behalf."

"The truth? How do you know she's not going to lie again?"

"How do you know she wasn't telling the truth that night, Grace, and we were wrong about Robbie?"

Grace was stunned at what she heard. "Cecilia! How can you even think that Robbie could have raped that girl!"

"I don't, Grace. I was just saying... I'm sorry. I was just making a point." Cecilia responded. "I was shocked that everyone so readily believed that Robbie could have attacked my cousin. It hurt when mother accepted Briony's story over my version. Briony told me who it really was, Grace, and based on certain events and what Betty has said, it's not going to be easy. I fear all is lost if he's gotten to the old man."

It was Grace's turn to feel sick. Cecilia didn't actually state who the real attacker was but Grace could figure it out. "Your father, Cee, believes in Robbie. He has told me time and time again that he is sorry for not standing up for you. But he loves your mother very much and he did not want to hurt her by going against her. He's told me many times that he made the wrong decisions. He excused himself by telling himself that he wasn't there that night and should not get involved, but when Robbie was convicted he realized it was too late. Talk to your father. He's due to arrive soon. Talk to him and tell him how much you love Robbie."

She hadn't seen anyone from her family save Leon who waited for her outside the hospital on a few occasions since she left home. She hadn't carried on any kind of a serious conversation with him since returning less than triumphantly from Cambridge and that one wasn't the most pleasant. The exchanged words every once in a while, the last time was on the phone when he told her Robbie was going to medical school. She knew that he wasn't actually telling her that Robbie was going to medical school, but again chastising her about her poor finish and asking her what she was going to be doing with her life. "I haven't really talked to him in years. I did a lot of things with him when I was little... but then he got busy."

"He's been so busy with work lately, but when he comes home he's always here for the family. He loves to spend time with your mother." Grace replied. "He regrets not standing up for Robbie. He's been looking for a chance to redeem himself. Talk to him. Give him a chance, Cee."

Cecilia nodded. "I'll talk to him."

At that moment, Betty burst into the dining area. Exasperated, the kitchen head spoke. "I'm sorry, but I need you back. His highness has just paid us a visit and insists we make him and his guests a 'scrumptious desert' with the delicious chocolate he had delivered. Honestly, I don't know what he thinks we can do with fifty pounds of chocolate." she replied. "Mind you, Grace, he still wants us to make the cobblers as requested this morning."

Grace sighed, and she and Cecilia followed Betty back into the kitchen. As if it there wasn't enough going on in the kitchen already, now there were fifty pounds of chocolate taking up much needed space.

Jack Tallis drove up the Surrey path toward his home. Finally! He did not feel the least bit guilty leaving the fellows back at the Ministry. He missed his wife, and just wanted to get away. He hated this war. It was making everybody crazy. There were those who wanted to 'kill them all' and those who believed in 'negotiations'. Jack agreed with his colleges that Hitler a mad man who needed to be stopped at all costs, but by no means did he want to 'kill them all'. No, that would be no better than Hitler's 'Jewish cleansing'.

He continued his drive and pushed thoughts of the war and work away. His home was his getaway. Never bring work home he always told himself. He thought of his beautiful wife. He knew she probably suspected he was having an affair with a beautiful young secretary or something. The truth was, he did have a beautiful young secretary, and she did come on to him. It disturbed him, however. One, he was married and still loved his wife dearly. Two, she was young enough to be his daughter and that was very wrong. The very thought of having an affair with her would be like having an affair with his own daughter.

He pulled up to the house only to find his parking spot occupied by a grey Rolls Royce Phantom III. He grumbled. This was his home. He did not care how much money Paul Marshall had, this was his home and Marshall's car was in his parking spot. He had married his wife's niece but that did not give him the right to park in his parking spot. He sighed and parked elsewhere.

Entering the house, Jack called out to his wife. "Emmie! Emmie, dear." He got the attention of not his wife, but Paul Marshall who immediately went into a pitch to buy stock in his chocolate factory. Ignoring him he called out to his wife again. "Emily!"

This time his son acknowledged. At least he was informative.

"Daddy, Emily is up in her room with one of her migraines again." Leon replied.

Jack could tell by his son's tone that he did not believe in his mother's illness. "Thank you, Leon." he responded trying to push by Paul Marshall and get up the stairs to his room to check on Emily. Marshall was insistent on speaking to him about investing. Jack saw no other choice but to acknowledge him. "Mr. Marshall, I have not been home in several months. I have not seen my wife in all that time. I am home. When at home, I do not wish to discuss business." he responded. "I have a beautiful secretary. If you wish to discuss business with me, stop by the Ministry and talk to her. Make an appointment."

"You need to act fast." Marshall responded as though he had not heard a single word Jack had said. "I'm holding some prime stock for you. I can't do that forever. With our busy schedules, I'm sure you will agree that now is the best time to talk. Even the common folk are clamoring to buy stock in my 'Army Ammo' bars."

Jack sighed. He did not want to invest in Marshall's chocolate, especially the Army Ammo bars. As a member of the Ministry of Defense, he was part of the committee formed to decide what went into the soldiers' packs and had a taste of the chocolate. He hated it. He and a couple others were outnumbered and the Army Ammo was included. Boost morale? Whose morale? Certainly hard as rock sugar casing covered horrid tasting chocolate wouldn't be boosting any hungry soldier's morale. No, the only morale boosting the chocolate did was for the pompous man standing between him and his dear Emily. "Right now, I am going to see my wife. Please excuse me." He shoved Marshall out of his way.

"We will work out the deal later, Jack." Marshall responded completely undaunted.

Jack half expected Marshall to follow him up the stairs, but he remained where he had shoved him. He had liked Marshall at first. Originally he thought that his son's friendship with the man would give Leon some backbone, a sense of taking charge. Instead, his son picked up the worst attributes most noted, a sense of self indulgence.

He reached the door to the bedroom he shared with his wife and opened it slowly so not to make too much noise and disturb her. She lay on her back eye mask over her eyes to keep out the light. She did not stir as he closed the door slowly behind him.

"Emmie, dear." he replied softly.

Now, she stirred lifting her eye mask, squinting painfully in the light. "Jack, darling. You made it. How is everything?"

"Not so good I'm afraid." he responded as he made his way to her side and kissed her on the cheek.

"Would you be a dear and check on Betty in the kitchen?" Emily asked. "I'm afraid I haven't been much of a hostess today, and I'm sure that retched man has been overwhelming her with demands about dinner preparations. Will you tell her that I'm sorry?"

"Of course." Jack left his wife's side to allow her to wait out her migraine. There were those, like his son who thought Emily was faking her headaches. Leon even told him to his face to stop falling for her tricks. He did not scold his son at the time, but instead told him to keep his opinions to about how he treated his wife until he had one of his own. Then and only then would he be allowed to give him council on the matter.