Beyond this point, there be spoilers for the first eight minutes of The Western Air Temple. I haven't seen the rest, because my computer is utter evil.
Disclaimer : If I owned avatar, Zuko would have covered himself in honey so that Katara would lick him.
All I can say is, I am truly, deeply sorry. 'Tis the season, expect more odd things. Next chapter is Christmas flavored.
What Might Have Been
"Alright, you can stay."
"Sokka! What are you thinking?!"
Said Water Tribe warrior held up a hand, interrupting his now completely irate sister, and turned again to address the (former?) Fire Prince. "You can stay, but you have to be Appa's uke."
The only sound for a few moments was a dull thump as Zuko fell to the ground, fainted dead.
"Sokka," Katara began slowly, weighing her words as best she could, looking for something that might be more politically correct and not playing so much off of the stereotypes her brother embodied. "Yaoi is for girls," she finally settled on, concerned over what Aang might hear.
"Yeah, seriously, Snoozles, you're not mature enough to read anything like that," Toph continued.
Aang was at a loss. Not only could Toph not read, but . . . "What's Yaoi? And what's an uke?"
"Nothing!" the Water tribe siblings shouted, quickly restraining Toph so that they could continue their argument. "How do you even know what that is? You never read!"
"Oh, like those sicko gay-porn picture books count as reading. You gotta find a better place to hide your smut, little sis."
"It's not smut! And why would you read it?!"
"I got bored," Sokka shrugged. "But we have more important things to worry about, like what we're going to do with a mentally and physically scarred mental-deficient."
"That's easy, leave him."
"We can't just . . . ." Aang trailed off, risking a glance at the prince. "Never mind. I agree with Katara. Let's leave him."
"I sort of like Snoozles' idea better," Toph said, finally freeing herself from the waterbender. "That way, Aang gets a Firebending master, and Appa gets some loving."
"I still don't get what that has to do with anything," Aang muttered. Uke . . . yaoi . . . where had he heard this before?
"The entertainment value, Twinkletoes. It's so funny how insecure you boys are in your own sexuality to be bothered by concepts like yaoi and bestiality."
"Beastiality? Wha–? Oh." Another thump, and Aang and Sokka joined Zuko in his yaoi-induced coma.
Alright, two for one! Toph did a mental victory dance. At least now I know how to get revenge for Iroh. Toph smirked evilly at the thought. "What I don't get is why Snoozles fainted at that one. He brought it up."
"He probably didn't think it through completely," Katara replied. She glanced around at the comatose boys. "You know, if we had the earth kingdom represented, we'd have a matching set."
"Hey, guys, what's— ?" Haru paused, the Duke and Teo right behind him. "What happened here?"
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the Uke-est of them all? You thought it was going to be serious, didn't you? Once again, I am truly, deeply sorry.
Poor, poor Haru. Who knows what Katara and Toph have in mind for them? Alas, I do not know. I'm not sure I want to.
Allowing for that, my brother now fears deviantart, not just for yaoi. Isaia-san and BooterFreak-sama, I love you. Zhao's bringing sexy back, and my brother really doesn't want it.
