He must have been furious. I think to myself. That's the only reasoning I can come up with that remotely makes sense.
In my experience, a red face means either fury or embarrassment. And I know that it's not the latter. There's no way. Plus, I've seen the red of fury too many times.
Peeta didn't say a word as I told Mr. Mellark I would come back the next day to give him an answer about taking the job. I also thanked Peeta for showing me how to make cookies, and all that I received in response was a nod while he walked away to the front of the bakery.
I don't know why this is bothering me so much. I think it's because, since I have decided to take the job, I know that I'll be working with him almost every day and I just don't want it to be awkward.
I decided to take the job for a couple of different reasons. Reason one, it's summer and I didn't want to hang around the Undersee's home all day.
I would be there alone.
Mr. Undersee is always at work and Madge is doing an internship with him. I'm not always sure what Mrs. Undersee does all day, but she's rarely home. And Prim… well, she is the complete opposite of me. She loves people and has already made a couple of friends doing some sort of summer camp to keep her busy. It completely shocks me that she can still trust people. That she's strong enough to do that.
That little girl is so resilient.
The thought makes me tear up as I walk towards the bakery. I never used to be this emotional. Damn hormones.
That's another reason why I took the job.
I needed something to do during the day to take my mind off what's going on with my body. Hunting and gathering in the woods already does a great job of that, but I know that I won't be able to that for very much longer. And if I want to be on my own someday, I need to keep a steady income. I figured I'd be safe with a job at the bakery.
As I reach the steps of the bakery, I stop and my mind goes back to Peeta.
Why would he be mad about me working here? Does he think I'll just screw everything up? Is it because he doesn't like me? He's always seemed fine towards me. He did give me cheese buns (twice) and even gave Prim a gift. But I've never spent a significant amount of time with him- until yesterday. We seemed to be having fun… that was probably just my imagination, though. I'm sure he was just being nice to me because I'm new and I've been helping his dad get food for the bakery.
Stupid. I've been so stupid.
Maybe this isn't such a good idea…
No. I have to do this. Even just for Prim. To be able to provide for her. She deserves that.
I imagine being able to have my own home where Prim can have her own room and there is always food on the table and we spend our nights by the fire talking or reading or laughing.
I smile and open the front door.
I hear the bell ring and see Mr. Mellark look up from the front counter.
"Good morning, Katniss. How can I help you?" He asks and smiles.
"Um… well," I begin. I've never been good at conversation. "I came to let you know that, well, if you would still have me, I would love to work here."
"I was hoping you would say yes." Mr. Mellark says and smiles once again. "Well, welcome aboard! If you want, I can have you start tomorrow so that you can have one more day of freedom."
I shrug. I have nothing else to do. "I'm really fine to start today if you would like me to."
"It's up to you. We have had a lot of orders come in over the past few weeks. Especially wedding cakes. Summer is prime time for weddings. We could use the help."
"No problem." I tell him.
"Ok then. Peeta is already in the back if you want to start there."
I freeze for a moment, but I nod and take a deep breath. I can do this. It's just a job. I stand up straight and prepare myself for the worst.
As I walk into the back of the bakery, I see Peeta putting a few loaves of bread into the oven.
"Hello, Peeta." I say as I try to greet him as professionally as possible.
"Hello, yourself." Peeta says in response. "I'm guessing you've decided to take my dad's offer then?"
"You guessed correctly." I tell him and he chuckles a little bit.
He really needs to stop this act.
"Well then, I also guess now I won't feel so bad putting you to work then."
"Guess not. So… what can I do for you guys today?" I want to get right to the point and do my job.
"We have some cupcakes that need to be frosted. Do you…" He pauses and looks at me. "Do you know how to do that?"
"Uh… no. I don't. I'm sorry." I say and look down at the floor. I feel stupid, realizing that I know nothing about working in a bakery. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.
"There's no need to apologize, Katniss. I can show you." He tells me.
And he does.
He shows me how put the frosting in an icing back and how to swirl it on top of the cupcake. His look so perfect that I know there is no possible way that I will be able to match it. And boy, was I right.
"Just try it." He tells me. And I bite my lip.
"Peeta… I can't do it."
"Katniss, yes you can. Just watch me one more time."
I watch his hands and try to analyze every little movement as best as I can.
"Ok, your turn." He tells me and hands me the bag.
I take a deep breath and look at the frosting in my hands. I need to do this if I want to keep this job. I begin in the center of the cupcake just as Peeta did, and begin to swirl. I can feel my hands shaking and it becomes even more prevalent in the design that I'm trying to make. It looks absolutely awful. I stop and sigh.
"I can't do this."
Peeta sighs. "Let's try this." He says as he comes up behind me. I freeze. He begins to put his arms around me and I push him off and turn to face him. I don't let anybody touch me. Not anymore.
"Katniss, I'm just going to show you how to move your hands so that you can get used to it."
I give him a questioning look but turn back to the cupcake and let him put his hands on top of mine. It's been so long since somebody has touched me. Especially a man. But for some reason, the warmth of Peeta's hands seem to make me want to run towards it, not away from it. The contrast between the roughness of a baker's hands and the softness that they also bring makes my stomach flip.
He slowly starts in the middle of another cupcake and begins to swirl, showing me the pressure needed to push the frosting out and the steadiness to perfect it.
"There." He says. "That's not so bad, right?"
I nod and bite my lip. Of course it's easy for him. I'm sure he's been frosting things since he was in diapers.
I try again and, to my surprise, it's not completely unfortunate looking. It's definitely not up to Peeta's standards, but it's decent.
"Well, that looks better." Peeta says as he looks at my work and smiles.
"Um, thanks." I say and work on another one. After about six cupcakes, I feel like I'm starting to get the hang of it and place myself into a "frosting zone".
"So, why did you decide to take the job?" Peeta asks and takes me out of my trance.
"Oh, um… I guess I didn't want to be around the Undersee's house all day by myself this summer. I mean, I appreciate all that they've done for me, but I'm pretty used to being on my own." I keep my eyes on the cupcake I'm frosting.
"I see." He says. "I wondered if maybe Madge's parents said something to you after my dad had talked to them. They said…"
"Wait, he did what?" I ask sternly and turn around. I can feel the heat building up inside of me and I squeeze the icing bag a little too hard, squirting frosting everywhere. "Damn it." I say under my breath and start to try to clean everything up.
"Katniss, it's ok." Peeta says as he starts to help me.
"No. It's not." I tell him and push his hands out of the way. "None of this is ok, Peeta. What exactly did your father talk to the Mr. and Mrs. Undersee about?"
I look him right in the eye. He looks confused.
"I don't know exactly. But I know that Madge's parents have been concerned about how you've been adjusting here. So my dad thought it might be a good idea for you to work here to get to know people in the neighborhood and have something to do."
I look at him. Completely shocked. Why would they be concerned about me? They aren't my parents.
"Well," I begin. "I appreciate their concern and for your dad's generosity. But I'm nobody's charity case. I'm more than capable of taking care of myself. I've been doing it for half of my life now." I tell him and turn away.
I look at the counter and notice that there is still some frosting on my hand. I start to lick it off, and the nausea hits my like a brick wall.
Great. Perfect timing.
I guess I should have been expecting this. It seems to be around lunchtime. That's when the second wave usually hits, but it's never been set off by sugar before. I brace myself on the counter, take a deep breath and close my eyes, hoping it'll pass.
"Katniss," I hear Peeta say behind me, but I don't turn around. I just keep breathing in and out of my nose.
"Katniss, please turn around."
I hear him walking towards me, and I can feel my mouth watering. I'm not going to make it.
I cover my mouth and run out of the back door. I make it to the bush and empty my stomach of it's contents. When I finally finish, I sit in the dirt and put my head in my hands.
All of these questions start circling in my head: Did that honestly just happen? Why would the Undersee's do that? Why would Mr. Mellark do that? Why do I feel so betrayed by it? They were just trying to help me.
"Katniss?" I hear Peeta say behind me and I moan. I really wish he didn't just witness me. "Katniss, are you ok?" I hear and edge of concern in his voice and I just nod my head, still keeping my face in my hands.
"Can I do anything for you?" He asks and I shake my head while I lift it up to look at him.
"I'm just… I'm not feeling well. I think I'm going to head back to Madge's house."
He nods and helps me up.
"Do you want me to give you a ride?" He asks.
"No, no. The fresh air will do me good. It's not that far."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah. Tell your dad I'm so sorry." I tell him and begin my walk home.
A/N: Planning on giving a little more backstory next chapter. Hope you guys enjoyed this! And thank you so much for the kind words. Ya'll are the greatest. Truly. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review and favorite and let me know what you would like to see :)
