Food Groups
Whenever the class had English first period, they knew from experience that they would find Yukari-sensei asleep. Today was no exception. With her hands folded in a substitute for a pillow, her head cushioned in the crease of her elbow so she couldn't see anyone, the class were free to do as they wished.
Despite this, most worked or just blankly stared into space.
The exceptions were Tomo, who was folding a sheet of paper to make a paper aeroplane, her tongue sticking out in concentration, Osaka, who was asleep and Kaorin, who wasn't staring into space but gazing at the back of Sakaki's head.
A direct hit on Yomi's head with a papery whoosh, Yomi finally honoured Tomo with her attention (because really that was all Tomo wanted to achieve) to pick up the plane and, despite Tomo's protests, scrunch it up in a ravaging frenzy.
"Hey – Yomi!"
"Do some work." Yomi hissed quietly. Yukari snored.
"It's not like Yukari-sensei is watching." Tomo said, "She never teaches us properly anyway - "
Yukari suddenly sprung up from the comment, unfortunately mistaking Kaorin to have said it, and commanded her to get out and stand in the corridor. Kaorin complied, dejected to no longer be able to stare at Sakaki's hair – or at least the back of it – and was even more dejected when Kimura suddenly sprung outside the door to greet her.
"Yukari-sensei..." Tomo said slowly, "Why do you always sleep in our first lesson?"
Yukari looked around the class, who were now paying attention to her instead of waiting for the lesson to end. Yukari pondered her answer for a few moments, and then grinned.
"Has Nyamo taught you about food?" Yukari answered.
The whole class visibly slumped with a depressed blue aura. Why is Yukari-sensei always so fixated on food?
Chiyo-chan outstretched her arm eagerly, waving it in the air that looked adorable instead of looking irritatingly stuck up if anyone else had done it.
"Chiyo-chan." Yukari said, "Stand up so we can see you and tell us all about it."
She stood up, (although there really wasn't much difference), and held up her hand in the air. A backdrop of a pie chart came out of nowhere, and she pointed to each of the five segments with a pointer stick that equally came out of nowhere.
"There are the five main food groups," Chiyo-chan recited, "They are split up into fruit and vegetables - " She tapped the green triangle which had an arrangement of different fruit and vegetables.
" - meat, fish and eggs - " A tap of the red triangle.
" - dairy products - " A tap of the blue triangle.
" bread, cereal and potatoes - " A tap of the orange triangle.
"And sweets." She finished, pointing her pointer stick to the smallest pink triangle. Yomi nodded her head knowingly as Chiyo-chan told the class that they should keep everything in moderation when they eat, and to not each too much from the pink triangle.
"No, no, no." Yukari sighed, pulling the pie chart back to wherever it came from, Chiyo-chan's pointer stick vanishing in a pop. Chiyo-chan slunk back in her seat, trying not to cry because she got it wrong.
"Who cares about that stuff? That's not important." Yukari said with a wave of her hand, "No. We need to talk about food. For example - " she picked up a stick of white chalk and turned around to the blackboard, "Now. This is me."
She drew a picture of a rectangle, with some more rectangles on top. Realising this didn't make sense, she rubbed it out, and drew out a candy wrapper. Tomo clicked and said that it was a chocolate bar.
"Yes!" Yukari pointed at Tomo to say she had got it right, and then wrote 'chocolate' beside it, "I am a chocolate bar. Now – this is Nyamo..."
This time she drew a bowl with some small round ovals inside. Tomo clicked again and said that it was a bowl of rice.
"You're on a roll today, Tomo!" Yukari said, writing 'rice' next to the picture, before entitling both of them 'Yukari' and 'Minamo', "Now. Can anyone tell me, why I am a chocolate bar and why Nyamo is a bowl of rice?"
She looked expectantly at Tomo, and not used to being under so much pressure to get an answer right, she thought and thought of what it could be. Kagura raised her hand.
"Is it because a chocolate bar is more exciting than a bowl of rice?" She asked. Yukari gave a smug grin.
"You would think that, wouldn't you?" Yukari said, "That is one reason, but there is another one which is more applicable for this lesson."
This is a lesson? Yomi thought to herself. The class were silent and Yukari cackled.
"Looks like Nyamo hasn't been teaching you about food that much." Yukari said, "Now. Nyamo is a stupid Phys. Ed teacher, yes?"
"Well, I wouldn't say she was stupid..." Kagura said, but Yukari ignored her.
"So. She runs around all day, and needs a lot of energy. That's why she's a bowl of rice. If you eat a bowl of rice, you have sustainable amounts of energy to last you throughout the day."
"Oh!" Kagura clicked, "Like when you do a marathon?"
"Yes!" Yukari pointed at her in her correctness, "Now, I am a chocolate bar. If you eat a chocolate bar, it is tasty yes, but it gives you a mega load of super powerful energy!" She punched her fist into her hand.
"When you eat a chocolate bar, you get energy in short motivational bursts! So, therefore, I will teach you in short motivational bursts of pure teaching energy and sleep for the rest."
She finished abruptly, still standing in her declaration. There was silence, and if the class were listening, they could half hear Kaorin in the background screeching at Kimura-sensei to go back to his class.
Tomo stood up slowly, looking at her in comprehension.
"I think I'm a chocolate bar too."
Yukari glared at her.
"We are not the same." She said in a low serious voice, a slight hint of a threat hiding behind it.
Tomo sat down, unsure of whether to take that as a compliment or an insult. Yukari looked around the classroom edgily, and managing to trick them again (god some kids would believe such spontaneous nonsense) went back to sleep.
