He made me walk out of the room with my shame on my thighs, I hated him... hated him with a passion, and hated him even more when the audience parted for us. He held me by the leash, my hands tied in front of me attached to the collar so I couldn't pull my hands down. They laughed, but they didn't touch me, I think it had something to do with the look on Sesshoumaru's face, which I couldn't see but by the way they would glance at his face before turning their attention to me said enough. He walked me back to his room and into the bathroom where he all but thrust me into the tub of steaming water. I surfaced and he was kneeling at the edge, reaching to me before I could react he released my wrists and took off the binds, than took the gag from my mouth.
"Clean yourself," It was all he said...
I stared at him, "How dare you!" I screamed it and for a split second I wanted to take it back, "What did I do to deserve such humiliation! Why did you do that to me! I've been nothing but obedient and you humiliate me like that!" I yelled.
His face never changed, just stared at me until I finished and than he smirked, "You sound like your ready for round two?" I shut up and just stared at him, there was no winning. "I didn't think so. Remember, Kagome, you belong to me, I don't need a reason for what I do, but it only gets worse if you fight." I didn't know what could be worse than what he'd done to me in the dinning hall but I didn't want to find out. I remained silent and put my head down, I didn't want to see his face, but I did see his feet when he turned and left.
I cried because I hated him so much, I hated him for torturing me in ways my body loved, but were so humiliating and degrading, I hated that the entire time it happened I loved it and only once I thought clearly again did it bother me. He's let strange demons touch me and now this? Why all the public humiliation... because you like it... and I hated that I did. Some where in the mist of my crying Naomi had come in, she climbed into the water with me and wrapped her arms around my waist from behind, nuzzling into my shoulder, she didn't speak, just held me while I cried. I didn't know if she knew what happened, I wanted to tell her how horrible it was but at the same time I didn't want her to know, she didn't need my sorrow when she had so much of her own to deal with. I turned towards her and hugged her back, resting my cheek against her collar; she kissed the top of my head.
I hated hearing her cry, I thought I wanted her anger, thought I wanted something other than the emotions that had been brewing between us, but now that it was in front of me I wasn't sure what to do with it. I sent Naomi in after her and left because I couldn't ignore the sound of her crying.
I went to check on Jaken, I'd left him days ago to see to the smaller villages - because I couldn't trust him with the bigger ones - and also to see how the reconstruction of the slayers tribe was coming along. The slayers tribe had once been a great village of human warriors who would take care of lesser vermin so I wouldn't have to be bothered with them, since Naraku destroyed it I've had all these little complaints on my door step so it was one of the first things on my list of to-do-things: see the slayer's tribe brought back to its former glory.
I found Jaken squawking at a servant about mindless house chores, I liked my palace clean and I never seemed to have a problem with the cleanliness of it, perhaps it was Jaken who stayed on top of them, I never really stopped to think about it. "Jaken," he stiffened visibly and instantly turned, falling onto his knees as he did. I don't understand why that little toad shows such an extreme amount of fear, if I haven't killed him yet what makes him think I will now? He was chanting his apologies and begging for my mercy, it really did start to get irritating, "Reports for the slayer's tribe?"
He jumped up suddenly I could imagine the action hurt his back, not my problem. "Oh yes, milord, I've placed them on your desk!" My study, good, I turned and left. I had given him a writer so he could have reports written for me instead of having to listen to him stutter on and on about whatever the issue was. I arrived in my study and went to see the report, it was short, direct and to the point, just how I liked it. They had started rebuilding the huts, but repopulating the village was going to be difficult, he was requesting to take some of the western soldiers and use them as trainers for the human recruits. We would go to over populated villages and take volunteers first but if the village offered none, I told them to draft. I signed off the report and set it into a separate pile for Jaken to see to. I turned to the massive pile of still unread reports and mail... there were days I hated this job. I picked up the first sheet and began the tedious task.
I think I'd only been reading for about ten minutes before a servant knocked on the door, I gave her entrance and she sat down a tray of sake and glasses, it was almost mandatory by now, they just knew that when I went into my study to bring me sake. I stared at it and the servant asked if I would like anything else, I thought, I did want something else, but it probably wasn't appropriate to bring her in here. She would surely distract me, though, honestly I'm still not sure what I've been reading these past ten minutes, it kind of went in and went out without ever stopping to say hello. Hell with it, maybe she'd stopped crying, she calmed me to a strange solitude that nothing has ever done for me, I wanted her around, I admit it, so there.
"Yes, bring Kagome to me." The servant nodded without a question and headed out of the room. I waited... and waited... and waited... alright sake... and waited some more, where the hell was she. Than I could hear her down the hall screaming at the top of her lungs, I hissed because it wasn't what I had been hoping for. I could hear her struggling and the grunts of several other servants, or maybe they were guards, as they dragged her down the hall. A knock came and I stood up and went to the door this time. I saw Kagome and reached out grabbing her chin, "Stop this nonsense." I commanded her and the look she gave me almost made ME recoil. She glared at me as if I were Satan himself. I growled at her and grabbed her arm as she continued to struggle and scream, yanking her into the study and all but throwing her into the corner. I gave her my back to close and lock the door and that was a mistake - she attacked me. She jumped onto my back and I was reminded of how light and delicate she was with her futile attempts at taking me down.
I grabbed Kagome's wrist and pulled her around and partially over my shoulder, flipping her onto a large seating pillow. I climbed on top of her and straddled her waist, grabbing her wrists and holding her back, she screamed so I covered her mouth with mine, she bit me and I bit her back. I was getting frustrated with this, so I pulled the white tie to her simple kimono that she used when I wasn't forcing her to leave naked, yanking the material open to expose her skin. I used the tie to wrap around her wrists and tying them behind her back which was a bit difficult but I managed. I pulled away from her mouth and she started screaming again so I smacked her, it was really a light hit for what I could have done but it knocked her to the side and when she turned her head back her lip was bleeding, but she'd stopped screaming. I grabbed her by the chin and kissed her mouth, she didn't respond at all, she didn't shift or move as I licked the blood from her mouth that might have been a worse response... I think I preferred her fighting me to her sudden apathy.
I picked her up and sat down in the chair, sitting her on one thigh with her knees turned in between my legs. I nuzzled into her shoulder and picked up the page I was reading and went back to it with Kagome sitting silently in my lap. I could smell her anger, hell it was etched into her face but her scent was still sweet and it still was better than sitting here without her, perhaps she would relax if I didn't touch her.
I hated him, I hated him so much, I didn't want to be here, but there was nothing I could do, so I ignored him, if he touched me I refused to respond, I don't care why my body wanted, I'm stopping now. To my utter surprise he sat me on his lap like children sit when they go to see Santa and picked up a sheet of paper and started reading it. My curiosity got the better of me and I started reading it as well, the hand writing was beautiful, probably technically called calligraphy, each letter was a piece of art. I read it, it was talking about a coming out party for one of the Lord's daughters, his name was Lord Akatsu, though I didn't know what quarter of the lands he held, his daughter was Lady Yuki. The letter seemed to go on and on about how they would be eager to see Sesshoumaru there and how delighted they would be with his presence, it seemed a bit over done.
Sesshoumaru put the sheet down and pulled out a blank one, I watch him write in just a beautiful writing... I was jealous, my hand writing was miserable, but they wrote in mini masterpieces. He wrote a response saying he would attend, his was much shorter, straight to the point, I guess it wasn't necessary to be so elaborate and full of mush and bullshit.
I don't know how long I sat on his lap while he read through the papers; he would shift me on his lap every now and then. At one point he made me agree to not struggle or fight him and he would let me go, I agreed of course. With the use of my hands back I pulled the kimono closed and tied the belt back around it, keeping it in place. He told me to pull a pillow up that he wanted me beside him; I thought it was strange that he wanted me around at all and wasn't molesting me, but I did as he asked and sat beside his chair. I was only sitting there for about five minutes before I got on my knees and looked over the arm of the chair at what he was doing, reading each page as he went through them.
Sesshoumaru looked back at me and I quickly sat back down, he actually smiled at me, "You can read..." it wasn't much of a question, it sounded more like a statement but I nodded. "Where did you learn to read?"
I looked at him, "Back home everyone has schooling," I realized only after I said it that it wasn't the best answer; I should have lied or been less blunt.
"Where are you from that they teach their women?" And that was why I shouldn't have said it.
"Oh... humm... I'm from... ya know... far away..." that was smooth...
He looked at me with a brow raised, he leaned over and picked me up from the ground, positioning me on his lap again as he had earlier, it bugged me how he could practically throw me around like I was nothing. "I know you have a better answer than that." He kissed me; it was so quick and ended just as quickly that I was left blinking, not sure if it had actually happened. "I ask again, where are you from?"
"Really... I ahh..." I looked down at the plush rug beneath the chair and desk, trying to come up with a good answer, "I live by the well..." Well in the well really.
He kissed me again, this time for a split second longer, taking my bottom lip and suckling it before pulling back, "Does this place by the well have a name?"
What the hell was he doing? I tried for honesty, "Tokyo..."
Again he kissed me, this time he gripped my chin while he slid his tongue into my mouth, I didn't respond, I was still mad at him, but that didn't seem to detour him as he wedged his tongue into my mouth and explored, dancing across my teeth and grazing the top of my mouth, reaching to touch my tongue. I pulled away and to my surprise he let me. "I've never heard of Tokyo before, but the well is within my lands, I know all villages within my lands... but you're not lying either. Perhaps you will take me to this village some time." I didn't speak just nodded, hopefully he would never ask again.
He kissed me again, this time his hands ran into my hair, cradling the back of my neck, his other hand ran down my shoulders and over my back, he didn't pull the kimono off and I was grateful to keep my clothes for now. I touched his chest while he kissed me, he licked my lips and I finally opened my mouth and ran my tongue against his. He purred and I moaned into his mouth. He held me between my shoulder blades and I kept my hands on his chest keeping a certain distance between us while we kissed. He was an amazing kisser, and I couldn't help but submit, I loved when he kissed me even if I didn't like what he'd done to me earlier, his kisses were still divine.
He pulled away slowly and I realized I was panting. His eyes were on my, those molten amber eyes, staring into me, piercing me, but I got the impression he was just as trapped by me. He picked me up and carried me bridal style out of the room, taking me a direction I did not recognize but knew it wasn't back to his room. I stayed silent as he walked me down several flights of stairs and finally out large double doors to the outside.
I smiled at the sight of the gardens, the sakura trees were beautiful with light pink petals, the ground was a thick layer of plushy green from grass to bushes, sprouting out colors of flowers, pink, blue, purple, orange, all of them arranged so they complimented each other. He walked a stone pathway, past a koi pond with colorful fish swimming around and back into the trees, past the sakura trees and into a thicket of willows where their branches seemed like a curtain. I wanted to ask him to put me down and let me walk but just as I was about to he stopped in the middle of a small clearing, obviously arranged that way, by the way flowers circled the patch of grass.
He laid me down and laid beside me, traping me with one leg and one arm thrown over me, he nuzzled into my neck and I squirmed and looked over at him. His eyes were closed and there was a slight curve to his lip, it was strange but he looked unreal with the sun dancing between the leaves and caressing his skin. A stray strand of silver hair fell over his face just as his eyes opened and he stared at me, suddenly he wasn't the cold hearted killer, he wasn't the one who tortured and humiliated me, he was someone else, someone beautiful and peaceful, someone who seemed unphased and pure of the darkness. It was strange to see him that way. I brushed the strand of hair back and he watched my fingers, resting his head on my collar, I laid my head back as well and we laid there, it didn't seem right to be so comfortable with him, to feel so serene with his head upon my breasts. I placed one hand over his hand on my waist and the other at the back of his neck, burying my fingers into his hair, he purred while I ran my fingers through his hair.
"You're scent is divine..." I didn't see his face when he spoke but when I looked down his eyes were closed again and he just seemed serene, I didn't know what to say so I didn't say anything at all, just laid my head back and went back to petting his hair.
I thought about his scent, it was strong and earthy, the few times I wasn't haunted by the cruel things he did to me I could find comfort in his scent, it was so stable and powerful, and I felt like that power extended to me when I was close to him and he wasn't torturing me. I wanted to tell him, but I was afraid it would destroy the peace of the moment. I closed my eyes and felt tired with him so close, his scent lulled me into an abyss of bliss. I felt myself fading into sleep, his claw was drawing small circles on my stomach and I didn't care. I vaguely remembered the sound of his voice, "What are you doing to me?"
