3:34PM
William Lewis had to admit, he was pretty damn proud of himself. Four years out of the game hadn't lessened his skills and it wasn't as if this was some garden variety victim. This was THE Olivia Benson and her little boy. Two hours outside of Manhattan, in a secluded cabin in the woods.
So he would wait, as he'd done with some many other victims countless other times. The longer he waited, the more hope they had that he wouldn't do it, or, in Olivia's case, that her team would rescue her before he got the chance to have his way with her. Four years had made him, well, incredibly bitter, about the whole situation and he wanted to see the hope in her eyes die when he finally took her, he wanted to break her so badly that she would beg him to end her life, beg him to spare her the shame of facing her team, the world, and especially her son.
So he figured he could pass the time by screwing around with the brat. He had to admit, he had some sort of...fascination with the boy. Noah was, by default, an extension of his mother. Yet he was also something entirely different; something innocent and moldable.
When he entered the tiny bedroom he had shoved the boy into he noted that immediately Noah's eyes were on him, holding his breath as if waiting for something bad to happen. Lewis lingered in the door frame for a minute, just staring at him.
"Where's mommy?" The boy's voice was barely above a whisper and he hesitated saying it for fear of what the answer might be.
"She's in the basement and she's fine," He paused, "for now." And with that he took a step into the room and shut the door behind him, leaning against it, "You're still scared of me." It was more a statement than a question.
"You're a bad man."
"Oh? And why is that, because your mommy told you? You can't trust everything your mommy says. At some point you have to make up your own opinions." He walked slowly over to the side of the bed, noting the way Noah tensed up, ready to scramble away at any second. Instead he stood there by the side of the bed and pulled out the phone, "Let me give you a little life lesson Noah. Don't be so trusting. There were plenty of smart ladies like your mama who trusted me. Do you know where they are now?"
Noah shook his head.
"They're all hiding, just like your mama tried to hide from me, tried to hide you from me." He smiled at the thought of his living victims, cowering in fear, unable to form relationships, their lives crumbling before them. All except Olivia Benson.
"You hurt me." Noah finally whispered, looking up at Lewis with fearful eyes.
"I didn't hurt you, if you thought that was hurting you then I'm afraid you haven't seen anything yet. Besides, it's not like I wanted to; I had to. Your mommy had to be taught a lesson, and that was that she can't lie to me anymore."
Noah looked as if he wanted to protest, as if he wanted to tell him that his mommy wasn't a liar. But after the events of that morning Noah didn't know what to believe, he didn't know if his mommy really was telling the truth.
"Who do you miss the most?" He asked suddenly changing the subject.
"Huh?" Noah asked confused.
"Who do you miss the most?" He repeated, giving a slight groan out of frustration at the confusion playing out on the boy's face, "From home, I mean." He clarified.
"Uncle Rafa." Noah didn't have to think about it. He loved all of his family, but he particularly liked Uncle Rafa; he was nice, he would bring him little gifts and if he was there at bedtime he would read Noah a bedtime story.
"Uncle Rafa?" It took him a couple moments to put it all together, figure out who Uncle Rafa was and then, just like that, it clicked. "They're your family aren't they? They helped her raise you." Lewis mumbled, more to himself than to Noah. It made sense and suddenly he felt stupid for not realizing it sooner! Olivia's family was her squad, they supported her throughout his entire trial, they fought like hell to make sure he got put away and now? Now they were helping her raise this little boy that sat in front of him.
It also meant that this was personal for the entire unit. They all hated him, they all knew what he was capable of and now he had two of the most important people in their lives. The closer they were the harder this fall would be for them, all of them. He couldn't help but chuckle, this was almost too perfect!
"Hey Noah? You wanna make another phone call?"
3:57PM
"Damn alright, if something pops up make sure you call us immediately." Fin hung up the phone. Another call to another precinct and nothing. Not many places up there by the mountains had street cams that would have picked up Lewis and even if they had he could have switched the plates. A black SUV was like finding a needle in a haystack, they didn't expect to get anywhere with it anyway.
"Nothing?" Barba asked after observing the sergeant's frustration.
"Nothing, I mean this-"
The soft chime of a phone broke their conversation. Barba turned; it was his phone, he told Carmen to take call of his calls, there was no reason for someone to call his cell phone when they could have called his office! He sure as hell wasn't much good to anyone right then! Plucking it off the table carefully he took a look at the bright screen.
Glaring back at him was an 'Unknown Number' on the screen, the phone vibrating in his hands, chiming away, alerting him endlessly to this video call, "I don't know what to do." Suddenly panic gripped him. An unknown number meant one of two things; another death threat, or William Lewis. Rafael almost wished it was a death threat, "What do I do?" He choked out, clutching the phone so hard his knuckles turned white.
"Answer it, you have to answer it." Fin herded him into Liv's office.
"What about TARU?"
"We don't have time for that Barba, you need to answer it." Fin glanced outside of the office; there was no way that he would be on the phone long enough for a trace, he was smarter than that.
Rafael stared at the screen of his phone, still hearing the chime of his ringtone, almost mockingly. It was such a pleasant little tone, it didn't quite match the severity, the foreboding energy that was radiating out of his phone with every chime. He had to answer, he had to be strong and he had to be prepared for whatever horrors awaited him on the other side of that screen. He sucked down a deep breath before hitting the little green telephone, the screen popping up to reveal nothing but blackness. Fin and Rafael both held their breaths.
"Is this ADA Rafael Barba?"
Rafael resisted the urge to shudder at his voice, it was almost too calm, "Yes."
Not a moment later did the blackness on screen fade away and lift to reveal little Noah sitting on a bed, teary eyed, "Noah say hi to your Uncle Ra-fa." Lewis teased, putting an emphasis on the nickname.
"Uncle Rafa…" Noah said softly.
Rafael and Fin could only watch in horror and dismay as Noah's expression devolved from composed and afraid into a panicked expression as the tears started, "Uncle Rafa I'm scared! I want to go home!" He hiccuped in between sobs.
"Noah, mijo, " His voice cracked slightly, inwardly cursing himself, "We are going to find you and mommy okay? I need you to stay strong for her, she needs you okay?" Rafael didn't know what else to say. There was nothing he could do, he was completely powerless in this situation and he hated it. Here was the little boy he loved and adored, scared and in danger and there was nothing he could do to help him. So he decided he would have to take a risk, "Noah? Noah where's mommy?" He asked, praying that Lewis would let the game get to his head. He needed the bastard to slip up, just once that's all he needed.
"She's in the basement, he won't let me see her anymore!" Noah wept.
"I know you're not a detective Mr. Barba so I don't expect your questions to be perfect but isn't there a more important question you should be asking little Noah here?" He taunted.
Rafael swallowed dryly, "Noah, can you tell me where you are?"
Noah shook his head, "I don't know." His eyes darted from side to side anxiously, "I'm sorry…" He whimpered.
"Aw it's okay Noah." Lewis pretended to comfort the boy, "It's not your fault you don't know, you were sleep-ing." Again he placed the emphasis on the syllables of the last two words and Rafael knew exactly what he was doing. This wasn't just a phone call to taunt them , this was to tear Noah apart, piece by little piece. He didn't need to be physically violent towards Noah, what he was doing mentally to the boy was torture enough.
"I-It's okay Noah, it's okay." Rafael comforted, "We are going to find you and your momma, okay?" He knew it probably sounded dumb, it was probably something that Olivia had already told Noah but he didn't know what else he could say to calm the boy. He just wanted to see him smile, he wanted to cuddle him and sit on the couch and watch disney movies again.
"He's gonna hurt mommy," Noah's bottom lip quivered as he wiped at her teary eyes, "Mommy said so, she said I have to be good, but I don't want to, I want to go home and I want mommy to be okay!" He blurted out, "We're in a cab-" There was a loud rustling noise then.
"Ah, ah, ah! Noah! I told you the rules, why do you have to try and break them? Be a little less like your mama, if she didn't break the rules you wouldn't be here!" He scolded.
"I hate you, I hate you!" Noah screamed. That was the last thing Rafael and Fin heard for 10 seconds, when everything came back into focus, Rafael was staring face to face with Lewis, a smirk on his face.
" Mijo, " he imitated, "That means 'son' right? You and Olivia get that close huh? That's a serious conflict of interest Mr. Barba."
"Leave him alone." Rafael hissed, shaking his head, "You leave Noah alone."
"No I don't think so. I think I'm gonna keep him." Lewis started, "You know before this I never thought about what would happen when I died, what legacy I'm gonna leave behind...Who's gonna take over for me." Rafael could tell what he was getting at and he didn't like it not one bit, "When you fail to find me, by the time you find Olivia's body I'll be long gone and so will Noah."
"No!" Rafael shook his head, sudden panic gripping him.
Lewis didn't respond to that, simply smirking, "Now if you don't mind I believe Olivia and I have a date with destiny. Bye bye, Uncle Rafa. "
And then the screen went black.
6:32PM
Olivia woke up with a sharp inhale at the sound of the door opening. She scrambled upright, hissing when the cuff bit into her wrist. The lights switched on and Olivia squinted from the sharp and sudden brightness. She wondered what time it was, how long she'd been out but she didn't get the chance to try and gauge it before he had come down the stairs and turned to her, expression unreadable as usual.
"What time is it?" Olivia dared to ask.
Lewis shrugged, "I don't know, I would ask you but seeing as you're down here in the dark you can't be tell. I got bored of Noah so I decided to come back down here, maybe you're up to being a little more agreeable now."
Olivia immediately felt a wave of anxiety wash over her, "What did you do."
"Nothing yet. He and I talked." He lit up a cigarette casually "You know he's probably one of the most innocent kids I've ever met? I guess that's no surprise seeing as he's got a paranoid sheltering mother whose only family is the people she works with." There was a pause as he took a long drag before looking at her, "I'm gonna be the one to take away all that innocence. No matter how this ends I can promise you he will never ever be that little boy again."
Olivia closed her eyes and took a deep breath, willing away that thought. She couldn't bring herself to think about that, not yet anyway.
"Well I guess...we should get to the main event hm?" Lewis asked lazily, side eyeing her to gauge a reaction.
Olivia swallowed thickly, finding that her throat had become dry and constricted. This was coming, she had known that, but it didn't make it any easier to come to terms with. She didn't want to panic, she wanted to keep a stone cold expression and maybe if she didn't fight him he wouldn't go through with it…She knew what to expect, she'd only gone over his case file maybe 100 times in the past 4 years, she knew what he did to his victims and she had seen just about the worst of the worst in her 19 years at SVU. It wasn't even the physical pain she was worried about shockingly, so much as it was the emotional scars she would face once it was over. If she made it out alive would she be able to return to SVU, everyone knowing she was a victim? How would she explain all of this to Noah now versus when he grows old enough to understand what was done to her? Would she be able to live with herself knowing that she was violate in much the same way as her mother, as if it truly was her fate?
The sound of the cuff around her wrist falling to the ground with a dull scrape brought her back from her thoughts, she jumped slightly at it, pulling her wrist to her chest and rubbing the raw area, "What-?" She was about to ask, confused as to why now would he uncuff her.
"You are going to comply with my every demand, now." Again his tone was cold, unemotional as he gestured to her clothing with the gun as leverage. He didn't need to say it for her to know what he wanted.
Olivia saw where this was headed and she wasn't going to stand for it, shaking her head, "No, I am not going to..to be complicit. If you're going to rape me then you're going to rape me, there's no other way around it." She couldn't bear the thought of listening to him, taking her clothes off because he asked, doing what he asked her to do. She knew in her head it would still be rape but she also knew how much doubt it would cast if she complied now, how much people already had trouble believing her because of what he said in the courtroom…
Surprisingly Lewis stayed eerily calm, she had expected him to snap again but no, he shrugged, "Well alright." He took a step towards her, "How about we play a game then, hm? A game with Noah." Olivia didn't like where this was headed, "It's a fairly simple game, you and I played it and I'm sure you'll remember." He turned away from her and walked towards the stairs, stopping when his foot hit the bottom step, "It's the same game I played with you and Liz Mayer. If don't feel like cooperating then Noah will sit here and he will watch every awful thing I do to you and if he dares to close his eyes then well...you'll suffer the consequences. How do you think a game like that would affect him?"
Olivia's eyes widening and she shook her head, "No don't-" But he was already headed up the stairs, "Lewis don't-! Don't!" She yelled, a sob catching in her throat, "Please! Please, I'll do whatever you want." She cried out in defeat, a last ditch attempt to spare Noah that trauma.
He stopped at the door and turned around, heading back down the stairs, a smirk on his face, "I thought that might change your mind. Now…" He gestured again to her, waiting expectantly.
Olivia's carefully built facade cracked, her shaking hands gave away her absolute despair in that moment as she peeled back the layers of her clothing. First her shoes, then her sweater, even slower her pants. Standing there in the basement she felt a sudden chill hit her, causing her to shiver though she didn't think it was because of the temperature. She looked at him, standing there in her undergarments while his eyes raked over every inch of her.
When he chuckled Olivia betrayed herself, the tears started streaming down her face and no matter how hard she tried to wipe all of them away it kept coming. Part of her wished that he would just get it over with instead of dragging it out like this.
"Crying already? I haven't even touched you yet." He sauntered up to her, she couldn't look at him, still blinding wiping away her tears. He idly played with a piece of her hair, fully intent on dragging this assault out as long as possible, "Your hair," He started, "I'm glad you grew it out, it looks nice. I can't tell you how upset I was to see you chopped all of it off after our time together, I always did say it was one of your better features."
"You don't wanna do this…" Her voice was thick with tears yet unshed, her tone was sullen. She knew it was a stupid thing to say, it didn't make any sense.
Of course all he gave a dry laugh, "Actually I think I do." She didn't understand how he could sound so...she wasn't quite sure, it seemed to be a mix of amusement and power, lusting in a way.
"I should've shot you when I had the chance."
"Well you didn't honey, and it's a little late now." He brushed the gun across her collarbone, intentionally pressing the cold steal a little harder on her burn, causing her to whimper and pull back, "I didn't say you could stop there."
Olivia resisted the urge to hit him, she resisted everything inside of her that screamed to fight him, to do something to subdue him. It was unrealistic, there was no way that she was going to be able to subdue him, he would put a bullet in her without a second thought and then she'd be leaving her son alone with him. She couldn't do that. Instead she would have to listen and she would have bare the scars, she would close her eyes and endure.
Shaky hands went behind her to unclip her bra, letting it fall to the ground in front of her and immediately wrapping her arms around her chest modestly. Suddenly she couldn't remember a time in her life when she was this vulnerable. Exposed to the last man on earth she wanted to be exposed to. She heard him clear his throat, not daring to look up to read his expression, she didn't have to, already knowing what was catching his impatience.
Her arms felt heavy all of a sudden and that feeling of despair gripped her so tightly she didn't think she could move. Suddenly she looked up at him, a deer in the headlights look in watery, tear-filled eyes. She didn't even think she could speak.
"You're beautiful," Lewis brought a hand up to caress her cheek, relishing in the confused look on Olivia's face; the way her brow furrowed, tears dripping down her cheeks, the way her nose scrunched up slightly and when she inhaled, seemingly with a question on her lips, "You know, I've never wanted anyone more." His voice was soft, endearingly almost, his hand trailing down her face, resting on her shoulder lightly.
He saw the confused look melt into a despair that seemed entirely new to her, a sob gurgling in the back of her throat, threatening to force its way out.
"You should consider yourself lucky, not many men would escape prison and then come back for a woman." His hand trailed lazily across her collarbone, suddenly she became hyper aware that she still had her necklace on, "I could have been in Canada by now, but I came back for you now if that's not love, I don't know what is." A silence settled across them, his fingers curled around the pendant, Olivia closed her eyes, "Fearlessness huh?" He chuckled and for a split second Olivia thought my might rip it off of her neck, but he let it fall back against her chest, "Not so fearless now are you?" His voice was barely above a whisper.
She didn't understand how he was able to lay utter waste to her mental space, how he hadn't even touched her yet, he hadn't even raped her yet and she was already utterly devastated. Love, yeah, that was laughable. Obsession was more like it, some fucked up psycho obsessed with tearing her life apart so he could be king of the ashes. When she tried to speak up she found her voice was quiet, crackling on every word, "You aren't capable of love you just want to make others suffer. You're a psychopath."
He stifled a laugh, "Tell that to my lawyers. They all thought I loved them, that I was an innocent man in the wrong place at the wrong time, unfairly persecuted by the authorities. How is Vanessa by the way? Could she even face you knowing that she's the only reason I was able to get to you and, of course, her dear old mom and dad."
Olivia shook her head, turning away from him, sniffling. She couldn't stand the way he was staring at her, it burned her skin, she just wanted the humiliation to be over.
However she supposed her body had not yet resigned to it because when she felt a cold hand move down and tug lightly at the waistband of her underwear on reflex she shoved him, scrambling backwards out of fear.
He had of course, seemed to anticipate this, because it barely seemed to affect him. The only telltale sign of emotion was an irritated roll of the eyes, "Gimme your hands."
"What?"
"You heard me, give me your hands."
"No." Olivia shook her head. It would mean that she would be exposed to him and the thought of that was too much to bare. When he pulled at her arms with an irritated look she fought him, shaking her head, "No!" It didn't take more than a minute for him to let go of her before backhanding her. This time Olivia wasn't able to keep her footing, hitting the ground with a thud and a dazed expression on her face.
"What the fuck did I say about fighting me, huh?" He seemed a little out of breath, his hands shaking slightly from anger, "That was really, really stupid Olivia. I don't know if I can forgive you for that one."
Olivia turned him, biting her lip so hard she could have drawn blood. She had a split second to make a decision. She could comply and PRAY that he forgave her actions, or she could continue in her defiance, resulting in traumatizing mental scars that likely would last Noah the rest of his life. So she decided, turning to him and pulling her arms away from her chest, holding them out to him, "I'm sorry…" She said quietly, her voice thick and garbled with tears.
"Really?" Lewis shook his head, "You think you can just say you're sorry and I'll forgive you? Come on Olivia, that's really fucking weak." Nonetheless he had harshly grabbed one of her wrists and slapped a cuff on it, "You're lucky I'm too turned on to go through the process of dragging your brat down here and explaining the game to him, he won't get lucky a second time." With that he looped the other cuff behind the support pole before yanking Olivia's other arm backwards and cuffing it, giving a smirk, "It'll be a little harder to pull this out than it was with the bedpost."
Olivia couldn't hold back a whimper, squeezing her eyes closed when she saw him staring at her. It was when she felt his hand run down her stomach and play with the hemline of her underwear that she had to swallow the sobs that threatened to come out. Unspoken pleas died in her throat before they even reached her lips. She knew that neither words nor tears would save her, not now, and especially not for him.
The tears came with reckless abandon when pulled down her underwear, leaving her completely exposed. The tears seeped out despite keeping her eyes closed. There was nothing left for her to pray for. The cavalry was not going to rescue her in time and for that a part of her felt disappointed. But another part of her had known the whole time that the reason she risked a text to Amanda was for Noah. This wasn't about keeping herself safe anymore, this was about keeping Noah safe; safe from harm both physically and mentally.
So she would keep her eyes closed and endure.
The next thing she felt was her back against the cold ground, her arms stretched almost painful above of her head because of the cuffs. She felt his hands on her body, barely ghosting over her skin. No amount of showers would erase that feeling; it was a part of her body's memory now. She would live with it for the rest of her life, no matter how long or short that would be.
"Olivia…" He purred, teasing her. It was entirely William Lewis, entirely how he lingered in her memories and manifested in her nightmares. She was sure that she would never forget that voice, no matter how hard she tried, "Open your eyes baby, look at me."
She shook her head, a whine gurgling in her throat, eyes squeezed tightly. She felt one of his hands trail up her body before grabbing her face harshly, "I'm only gonna ask once, sweetheart." Again his tone was teasing but underlying was something...dangerous. His fuse was short and it was growing shorter by the second.
Olivia took a gulp of air, opening her eyes to see him staring down at her, their faces inches apart. He wore such a smug look on his face, so superior...He flashed her a grin, "There you are!" For a moment she imagined knocking his damned teeth out, she wished she really could.
And just like that she felt the boiling rage turn down to a simmer, until it boiled no longer and instead turned cold and to Olivia's horror the fear set in, and so did the tears that burned her eyes.
"Don't-" She choked out.
"Oh honey," He chuckled, "It's a little late for that." And with that he forced a kiss on her, grabbing and squeezing her with rough hands, relishing in the whimpers and whines that forced themselves up from Olivia's throat, pressing kisses to her face and tasting the salt from her tears.
When he pulled back briefly she was breathing deeply, on the brink of sobs but not quite there yet, she had her eyes squeezed shut, struggling to keep calm.
"I would take a nice deep breath if I were you, I have a feeling that this might hurt."
And he had been right.
The feeling of him forcing himself inside of her felt as if she was being ripped in two. She cried out in agony, biting down on her bottom lip so hard it bled. There was only one thing Olivia was certain of in that moment, that he had ripped away a piece of her that had been buried deep down inside. A piece of her that she would never get back.
For the first time since the trial of William Lewis 4 years prior, Olivia Benson wished she was dead.
